What a week! Let's vent about some silly stuff, eh?
Believe me, there are quite a few intellectual subjects that I want to write right now, but it's pretty hard to focus with a headache. More thoughts on beauty, ideas about science fiction, excitement in response to the advancing technological leaps of our world, even ideas that I've been pondering about Allen Daughtry in regards to some suggestions from a fellow Deviant! I even need to take some time to put down my thoughts on Allen and what he means as a character and as a traveler in his own world.
But for now I simply do not have the energy for any of that right now. Instead, I feel like confessing some of the wild things going on in my life this week. Since Sunday, I've been diligently working with my uncle to improve my resume and prepare an effective strategy for finding work. This has entailed a lot of rethinking on the part of my accomplishments, and it's been one exciting discovery after another. One thing that I had completely ignored were some school newspaper articles that I had written back in late 2008 and early 2009. While it didn't mean much for my resume (I'm not trained nor interested in the media industry, so it's just another example of my writing competencies) it was pretty cool to look back at that time and see a younger me.
Back then, I was still at community college, I hadn't yet accepted my transition to university, my mother was still with us, and I hadn't met my (ex) girlfriend yet, so my life was pretty different from how it is now. Just think about that: not even three years later and so much has changed! I've graduated from school, which is now a thing of the past; I'm an aspiring professional ready to experience the rest of his twenties, and yet I'm still tormented by the shadows of my recent life. I don't want to reveal much, but it's been a tough period accepting my mother's passing - which was back in February - and now that I'm finally starting to accept the reality of my life without her, I have other significant people in my life coming back around. At the same time, there's the possibility that I might even move away to another State, leaving them all behind. Some of those people I'd miss, but a select few would be hard to let go - they know who they are. I'll just say this: doors are never shut all that well, no matter how hard you try to keep something in.
So that's the gist of how this year's been in a nutshell. And just this week, I've had two major stressors to handle, neither of which directly affect me (though are themselves pretty strong indirect forces). First, my brother has been participating in the campaign of a local politician as an intern for the past couple of months, and he's made quite a reputation for himself around the office, so they recommended that he apply to join a team working for the Presidential campaign. He's been called to work in Colorado - he's thankfully getting paid. We live near the nation's capital, so that's a pretty big transition for him, and they expect him by Monday. Long story short: he's been going crazy figuring out the logistics, and I'd been his stress reliever (a.k.a. punching bag/wall to vent at). So that's been fun, and further, I'm going to be without my brother for a six week period. We haven't been apart for years, and it's going to be REAL weird being in my mother's home all by my lonesome. Without work. Without many to see. So it's going to be... interesting. Don't get me wrong, I'm enthralled for him; this is the kind of thing that builds careers, in an industry that he loves. But it doesn't mean I'm all good on my end, you know? I love the kid, he's just a pain in the ass, that's all. The other stressor is just a lot of emotional shit involving someone very important to me. Again, I'll just say this: we've had a sudden and intense reawakening of our friendship, and it's gotten me pretty flustered.
*Big ass mofoin' sigh*
So... yeah. One of the beneficial escapes this week has been DA. I haven't read much, but I've read a few pieces and made an effort to comment for each person. Some have been real smooth to read - two or three artists and their works were a real pleasure to follow, and I've made a new comrade out of it! Others have been more work, but it was great to balance out the good and bad and post critically for the author to help them - and I've gotten some great feedback from them, heard their rationale and reactions, even understood some of their choices which otherwise clashed with mine and managed to help them develop. And then there were the guilty pleasures: celestial art and pretty photographic ladies, because I do LOVE my pretty ladies!
God, I sound like such a douche right about now. Please forgive me: it's not merely the appearance of these models which attracts me, it's the aura of the person before the camera. If you don't quite know what I mean, check out those which I've planted in my favorites collection. They're pretty, they're gorgeous, that whole shebang, but you can sense that they're BEAUTIFUL, too. What exactly does that mean? Hell if I know. That's why I wrote about it earlier!
Like how I made a call back to an earlier journal entry? Yeah, I know, I'm so smart.
And that randomly reminds me: I FINALLY discovered PSY's Gangnam Style! And if you've somehow not seen this video yourself, click the linky: youtu.be/9bZkp7q19f0
The song's brilliant when you get past the absurdly silly K-Pop. Just remember: once you overcome the really catchy beat, the wild outfits, the gorgeous girls (sorry ladies, the singer's not all that good looking, but he's got some serious SWAG, whatever the hell that means) and the great production, it's actually meant as a satirical piece on current upper class Korean culture. "Gangnam style" actually refers to the wealthiest district in South Korea, where the government encourages its wealthiest to incur up to 155% credit debt! It's pretty fun, and it's got some intelligence!
This has got to be the most neurotic journal entry yet. Okay: I'll admit, it's kind of a diary today. But you'll let it slide just once, right?
Next time, we'll get into some more productive material, I promise! Really!
See you, Deviants.