Hi everyone! how are you all?
I owe you a BIG BIG apologize for not being around! I've been busy till the point I really forget there are times for resting and so.
WHERE HAVE I BEEN?
Kiddos; I'm not in my country.
I'm currently working as an Au pair in the north of Belgium since 2 months ago and it's been a true rollercoaster.
The whole proccess of how did it happen is in my blog here: arepaflamenca.blogspot.be
It's been really exciting and part of a new cultural exchange which I love, but taking care of three toddlers is not easy at all.
I do my best though, but I'm slowly tiring myself and just hope not to get sick (which many of you know it can happen if you've been here around for a while) so I keep my hopes up and being finally out of my country represents emotionally speaking so many things.
You are free from that hell of insecurity and lack of opportunities
You get to know the world and a complete different culture
You are in a strange place
Nobody you know is with you, nor your family, friends... nobody.
You'll probably not see again people you love due to the circumstances
You were told not to come back
You don't know if your loved ones will be fine or their way out as well
You meet new friends and get to know incredible places
You enjoy your Host family and the new experiences they give you
You have to rebuild all the things that make you happy and evaluate if they still do
You had to say goodbye to your pets knowing they can't go out of the country
On the more personal side I had also the experience that one of my cats passed away 4 days before I left due to genetic and diet reasons, he was small and very delicate baby, It was so heartbreaking yet I had to stay strong all the way and once I arrived here I realized the whole thing and broke, completely. I had to take him to the person who would make his crematorium with all my family crying, they didn't even want to touch the box where he was in with this favorite blanket so I took it in my arms and stood there all the time without crying and acting strong but that was all a lie, when I was out of the proccess of all the final paperwork and already on the plane to Europe I stopped for a second and said to myself "it's all over, say goodbye and start again"
And it's so hard. So hard and it hurts so much I can't hold it properly sometimes, I can' pretend I'm okay so I hide in my room like just now.
But I will be better; I already am. And I love it.
I've already met with awesome girls who do the same job and it's what gave me oxygen from all of this
I hope to keep more active around here but my tablet isn't working properly with this laptop so let's see how can this be fixed.
Thank you for still reading me despite of being such a bad user and letting down all my watchers for so long ;___;
I hope you're doing well yourself and take care properly!
Loving you always,
IG: Elbereth Rojas
Facebook: Elbereth Daniela Rojas Rodriguez
Feel free to message me, it'd make me happy.
This Journal entry was so emotionally tiring, but I feel better now.