The title of my site should, I think, convey the matter is of primary importance in my life, at least in terms of the necessity of managing myself very carefully. As a secondary note I also have a dissociative personality disorder which means that, essentially, I have a complete inability to relate to either myself or other people on anything like an emotional level. I do not need to name this secondary condition. It suffices that I know that it is so.
You might think that the fact of my being bipolar, along with not being able to identify with any feelings that I might have, would speak to a certain dysfunctionality. Such is not the case. Rather I am, as my health professionals keep telling me, highly functioning. There is a singular reason for this fact. I have marshalled my formidable mind, exercised my inordinate will and directed myself across my days with a single teleological purpose in mind.
My aim - to cultivate what there is of my interior landscape in order to achieve an ever shifting balance, proportion and harmony across my days. In this respect I believe that I would refer to the aesthetics of my being in the world, to the kaleidoscopic harmony that is me. I have no care what other see, what they believe that they perceive when they look at me because what they see is not the case, not by a long way. I remain hidden from the world.