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Made From Scratch

:iconpinkiepieplz: ...And that's how Equestria was made!
:iconcelestiaunamusedplz: Now 'ang on a second! You can't just plop that "that's 'ow Equestria was made" nonsense on our laps and expect us to swallow it!
:iconcelestiaunamusedplz: So the big bang happened... then what? :iconpinkiepieplz: Our whole universe was in a hot dense state, then nearly fourteen billion years ago-
:iconpinkiepieplz:expansion started. :iconcelestiaunamusedplz: Wait... :iconpinkiepieplz: Earth ponies were pretty cool, the autographs began to drool, oni-chan developed tools, we went AWOL.
:iconmaudpieplz: We invented Spearmint :iconhappytwilightplz: 
Mad science, histarectomine, forgetting every line to speak- that all started with a big bang!
:iconpinkiehappyplz: ALLAHU AKBAR! :iconpsychotwilightclap: ALLAHU AKBAR! :iconrarityrapefaceplz::iconfluttershyscreamplz::icondashienuuuplz: ALLAHU AKBAR!!! :iconthemapplesplz: :iconexplosionplz:
:iconapplejackderpplz: Great. Now ah gotta gather all this matter and remake the universe. Jerks. :iconcarlsaganplz: Alright, I'm back. Wait- what happened to this thread?
:iconajawkwardsmileplz: A dawn of billions and billions of suns, apparently. Guess I may as well make that apple pie from scratch. :iconcarlsaganplz: Won't I need a body first?
:iconhappyapplejackplz: Oh there'll be plenty o' time fer that. We got all the time in the world- :iconajfillytrollfaceplz: Well; ya know what I mean, right?

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reminds me of a silly customer story: someone was told to make something from scratch, so he walked into a store and asked to buy some "Scratch"...