Hello my friends! This...is a bit difficult for me.
Most of you know I don't like to brag, but, well, have you ever felt you had so much to offer the world, and you've just unfortunately been handed the worst of circumstances in life and haven't been able to live up to your potential yet? That's my life at the moment.
I'm not here to give some long sob story so I'll try to keep this brief. Things haven't been easy over the last few months for me. The quality of my "home" life has gone downhill so much that I've had to force myself to make some major choices to try to have a better life for myself.
So I'm leaving home. My education will have to be put on hold for a minute until I can get a job and save up for a little while. I'll probably be hopping friends' home for awhile. If I'm lucky, this offer I have to live in another state for a few years will come through and I can just get away from my family entirely and start working on building my own life. I should have left sooner...but we all have our weaknesses and mine was caring too much what other people thought of me.
I've done so many great things, I feel, and didn't want to let all who have been there for me down because I raised their expectations so high. All my friends, teachers in high school, I've made so many wonderful connections outside home and it saddens me that, at least for a small time, I can't really be as great as I was. But that's okay, because I believe it's about time I care about myself more and do something that benefits me than someone else.
So that's why I am doing this. I know the road will be hard, but because of all the connections with people I have made, because of who I am, I know it could be a whole lot worse and I'm extremely lucky in the sense that I know I will get by just fine. I might be a little late at the "life" game than my peers and graduate much later than any of them or whatever, but that's okay too. Sometimes life happens. Just have to roll with what you've been handed you know?
I still intend to accomplish all I like to talk about, like improving education here in America, writing my books (I'm working on two atm woohoo!), continue to inspire and help anyone I come across, and stay my silly Rarity generous and Pinkie Pie optimistic self. It's who I am! And I'm proud of it.
Saying all this to say that I will be gone for awhile, if not ever (well, not ever, maybe just start anew with a different account sometime in the future). I don't know if I'm going to delete this one yet, too many wonderful people here that I don't want to forget or leave. I am sorry this chapter in my life has occurred, but I do hope you all will continue to support me as you have graciously been doing since I've known you.
I've had some beautiful memories made here...and made even more golden-hearted friends. I'll never be able to convey my gratitude and appreciation for each of you in a mere journal, but I do hope you can sense and feel just how much I mean it when I say these things, that you're special and important to me, that just talking to you alone was happiness enough and...sigh, if I go on I'll cry. Looking at my watcher list, it seems we're all getting busy haha. Anyways, for those of you who want to reconnect with me when I'm able to be more active in this difficult journey, please note me where I can reach you and I'll do my best to respond as soon as possible. For everyone else, do me a favor and smile. Be happy. Appreciate the little things in life. Indeed they are what help us get by, though we often don't realize it.
Thank you all for everything you've given me... I hope to return someday. Please, have a very happy day/night wherever you are. I love you! Goodbye.