Thu Feb 2, 2012, 9:22 AM
- Listening to: Invincible - Machine Gun Kelly
OPEN FOR COMMISSIONS for details click the avimharz.deviantart.com/journa…
just note me if you're interested.
It's been sort of terrible this past few weeks. *sigh It's not really showing because I'm posting artworks quite a lot but yeah it's terrible not on drawing stuff but stuff that actually isn't related to this somehow.
First, well you must have known that I opened up my commission business but since then I haven't got a single client yet. I'm not saying it's easy. I am aware it's extremely hard. It's not like I'm famous and popular like my idol and my skill is world's apart from hers. Normally, I wouldn't mind taking long in finding my first commission but the fact that my father is retired now, let's just say... that money is stressing me out. I can't really rely on my siblings for that cuz they have their own families to worry. So as of now I am pressured by these things.
Second, yeah probably the only thing that can solve the money problem is to get a job. I thought about that. The thing is, I don't really want to work on something I don't want like in I.T. industry. Seriously, if I ever work on any corporate companies I might commit something really terrible to me or to others. I really show my attitude when I'm angry. So I tried to apply to some art and animation companies but unfortunately, they just ignore or reject me and I feel like a piece of sh*t in the society because I don't have any income. When my mother gets back here in the country I'll feel even bigger piece of sh*t than I feel now. (my mom is not really appreciative of me doing art) I'm pretty much screwed.
So, in order to drown my sorrowness(?) away, I draw!
Which brings me to the third, I am currently working on an artwork now. I'll probably finish it tomorrow night if things go well because my computer is screwing me up as well. I don't know what's going on (it's pretty pathetic really despite the fact that I graduated from a computer course), it's the first time I encountered this stuff. So the only programs that are open are my browser, explorer and Photoshop. (i'm making youtube my mp3 player.) Then suddenly, the youtube and the other tabs in my browser crash then Photoshop begins to malfunction. (When I try to save it says "Cannot save because of disk error" and at times, when I'm just using the brush tool, it's saying "Could not perform brush tool because scratch disk are full" but it's absolutely impossible because I have tons of space in my hard drive.) And to that, I restart my PC and waste so many precious time.
So all in all, my life screws everywhere.
I apologize for my insanely long rant because I just need to get this off my chest. I don't really have people to talk to about this and this silly idiot is just gonna post this insane rant that will be seen by some deviantart people even though she should really keep her problems to herself.
Let's look on the bright side, I have many pageviews yesterday and today. I don't know what happened. Yesterday I had 73 pageviews which is an all-time high and today I have 54. So my overall pageviews boosted from 400-something to 600+ Which is pretty nice. I'm closing in on 1000.
I'm currently listening to Invincible by Machine Gun Kelly. I first heard it when I watched a WWE video about John Cena and the song is pretty nice so I looked it up.
I'm pretty sleepy now so I'm gonna stop this silliness. I'm gonna draw and paint tomorrow and forever. Once again, I apologize for all my ranting.
thanks! I'll find a way somehow... maghahanap ako ng himala... hehehe...