Thank you for the support. Everyone that left comments or private messages. I'm sorry I can't reply to them all because my heads in a loop right now (I'm currently fighting for my house) so I have my adult hours, then good memory hours; Playing Crash Bandicoot.
Sorry I have not been on but the title speaks for itself. The person I have been caring for the past few years was one of my best mates. Mum.
She had been suffering though and growing up she was such a strong yet feisty woman. As my aunty would say, mum had the tact of an ox. It was painful to see her from such a strong woman to a tired and fragile thing.
(Of course being the youngest, I got the most attention compared to my siblings who were/are much older. Yes I came as a surprise when she was 42 lol). So it explains what kind of woman she was, someone who knew they weren't perfect and obviously did have negatives and a few issues, but was absolutely selfless and always there for those that needed her. This means volunteering at bloody Op shops and taking perkies home, gifting them away to those who wanted or needed things. From the view as the youngest, mum was one of the best mothers you could ever get. She had the toughness but right amount of love. But I think it was just because mum mellowed out as she got older.
I don't want to go into detail of the last moments. But if you should know, the last thing she said to me and my sister was "Go home you two, hurry up" at the respite home. The following morning my sis got the message from the nurse (who ironically, is a gay man who mum used to work with at the op shops years ago and even nursed my father in the same home when he passed.) about her condition so my sis picked me up and...well yeah.
Knowing mum she was like "Bugger this"
If you are wondering mum did have COPD (Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disorder) so it started small and then progressed more over time. She was an extremely heavy smoker. That yeah, I DID get my name Ashleigh from an ashtray she balanced on her pregnant belly
(I kicked that off while within the womb
So to those that do smoke. No hate here, but don't make it a pack a day like mum did. She said she'd kill or haunt me if I smoked. (she said I can smoke socially so I gotta keep that lol)
Funeral was yesterday but I'm having a few beers right now to myself. She's with my oldest brother and sister now. She outlived two adult children and I love to think she is reunited with them. (no worries to anyone with or without spirituality here. I'm a science believer with some Anglican tenancies)
Oh, and dad (to those who remember my journal about his passing back in 2010) I can imagine her turning up and doing the whole Matriarch thing like she was with everyone still on earth and dad bearing the brunt of it, jks <3
But yeah. I'm one of those 24-year-olds that have lost brother parents but treasure the memories of having parents of the like. We never had much money but hell there were a lot of good memories. If its sounding long or whatever I'm having a few beers right now.
But who I also thank and take my hat off to is Tara Lurking-Leanne
who put two jobs on hold to come and support me. Seeing mum over the few years an also getting to know her too.