(At Logan's School; Logan opens up his locker, but someone pantsed him.)
Logan: What the?! (hears someone laughing and sees it was Ronnie Anne) Dang it, Ronnie Anne!
Ronnie Anne: Nice undies, Loud!
(The other kids laugh at and take photos of his expense. Logan growls in anger. Beginning of class, Ronnie Anne gets to her desk, she opens her desk and gets pie splats all over her face.)
Logan: (laughs) Way to get creamed, Ronnie Anne! Literally!
(The other kids laugh and photos of her expense. Ronnie Anne scowls at Logan. At lunch, Logan sits down in his favorite lunch seat only to hear something snap. He shouts in pains and finds that he sat on a mousetrap.)
Logan: A mousetrap! Seriously?!
(The other kids laugh and photograph this too. At gym class, the students were playing dodgeball. Ronnie Anne catches one. She notice the ball was covered with red paint. She sees the timer on the ball and it goes off revealing that it was a stink bomb.)
Ronnie Anne: *cough* *cough* Why that Logan Loud!
(The other kids laugh and photograph again. The bell rings and Logan checks his locker only for a bucket to fall onto him and cover him in yellow paint; the kids do what they did before again.)
Logan: (takes the bucket off his head and slams it on the ground; not taking it anymore) All right! That's it! I have had just about enough of this!
(Logan and Rusty are walking home from school.)
Rusty: So, you actually confronted Ronnie Anne?
Logan: Oh yeah. I said to meet me at my house, 3:30 and we're gonna settle this.
Rusty: Whoa! You're gonna fight her?!
Logan: Eh, close. I plan to challenge her into a paintball fight in the backyard. There I will SLAUGHTER HER! Ha, ha! I’ll teach her not to make another fool out of me.
Rusty: (noticing something) Hey, Logan. What’s that one your head?
Logan: Huh? (sees a sticky note on his head, pulls it off, and reads it) "Lame-O.” (There's also a piece of gum in Logan’s hair. Logan growls in anger and tears up the note) She’ll suffer for this!
Rusty: (sniffs the gum) Ooh! Lemon mango!
Logan: Dang it, I can’t let my sisters see this. If they do then they'll want to get involved and make things worse, the way they always do.
Rusty: Are you sure? Maybe they can help you with your problem.
Logan: Rusty, trust me. I’m talking from experience. You have no idea what it's like to have ten meddling sisters.
(Flashback to what looks like Logan being sick; Lori puts a thermometer in his mouth and checks his temperature; Lisa comes in with an X-Ray machine.)
Logan: Wait, no,no,no,no...
(Lisa already takes his X-rays, leaving him with glowing radiation; Luan dressed as a doctor with a clown nose and Luna bandaged him up real tight; Logan muffles and Luan removes the bandages covering his mouth so he can breathe.)
Leni: (carrying a bowl of piping hot soup) Here comes the airplane! (spills it all over Logan’s crotch) Oopsie.
Logan: (agonized) Gaaaaaaahh! My nuggets! (as Leni walks off screen embarrassed)
(Luna and Luan bandage up his crotch and Logan grunts in anger; end flashback.)
Logan: (holds up his foot and points at it) And I only just stub my toe!
Rusty: Well, then you'd better get that gum out or else Ronnie Anne won’t think you’re intimidating.
Logan: If there’s one I am it’s intimidating, Rusty. (tries to pull it out, but it's too grody to touch for him) Aw, gross! It’s still fresh!
(A squirrel approaches behind Logan. The squirrel sees the gum and laughs at him. Logan notices the squirrel and growls like a wolf at it. Frighten, the squirrel dashes off.)
Rusty: Hey, you should try using peanut butter. That will definitely get the gum out.
Logan: Chunky or smooth?
Rusty: Smooth, chunky will just make it worse.
Logan: Good point. Thanks, pal. Wish me luck.
(Logan goes into his house and looks around to see if any of his sisters are lurking; the coast is clear and he steps in and puts his backpack on the floor; just then, a news broadcast weather board appears next to him with his face in the sun.)
LHN 6 LIVE
WEATHER REPORT: CLEAR SKIES
KEEP UMBRELLA HANDY
Logan: The National Weather Service reports clear skies with only a 20% chance of meddling sisters. But we advise keeping your umbrella handy.
(Lily is playing with some of her toys and notices Logan coming in.)
Logan: Shh… (steps on a squeaky toy and lifts his foot up with some squeaking aftershocks from said toy) Stupid toy. (picks up the toy and tosses it away)
Logan: (grunts) Shh… (sneaks off)
Lori: (from the other room) Hold it right there!
(Logan thinks Lori has spotted him, but she's really talking to a friend of hers on her phone.)
Lori: He wore cargo shorts on your date? That is literally the worst thing I have ever heard.
Logan: Phew. (sneaks into the kitchen and gets to the fridge and looks for the peanut butter) Peanut butter, peanut butter… dang it, where's that stupid peanut butter?
(Lola comes in humming. Logan quickly closes the fridge and hides inside the freezer. Lola gets to the fridge and takes out a full plate of cupcakes.)
Lola: Just what I need for my tea party.
(Lana walks in.)
Lana: Oh, cupcakes. Can I have one?
Lola: No! This is for my tea party and you’re not invited!
Lana: Aw come on, just one!
Lola: NO! (runs off)
(Lana chases after Lola. The freezer door then opens up. Logan falls out shivering, with blue skin, icicles under his nose and a popsicle on the gum. Logan gets up from the floor and shakes it off. He opens the fridge and finds the peanut butter jar.)
Logan: Peanut butter! Yes! (opens the jar and discovers that it's empty; frustrated) What?! Are you kidding me?! What kind of idiot puts an empty jar in the fridge?! (grunts in anger and tosses the jar away) Well now what am I gonna do? I need to think of something.
Lori: (still on the phone) Socks and sandals? Cut it out!
Logan: "Cut it out." That’ll work! (sneaks past Lori)
Lori: Now that is literally the worst thing I have ever heard.
(Logan sneaks into his parents' room and grabs a pair of scissors to cut the gum out with; as he makes his way to the staircase, Lucy is coming down and Logan sticks the gum to the wall to hide it.)
Logan: Hey, Luc.
Lucy: Hey, Logan. Do you think you can help me with this poem? I need a rhyme for “fear”.
Logan: Uh… Near? Clear? Tear? Oh, back rear!
Lucy: Hmm… I think I can work with those. Thanks, Logan.
(Logan heads up the stairs and makes it to the door to his room, but his mother calls him.)
Rita: (off-screen) Logan, sweetie! I need you to take out the trash!
Logan: Okay, Mom! Five minutes!
Rita: Not five minutes! Now!
Logan: Three minutes, tops! That’s all I’m asking!
Lynn Sr.: Logan, listen to your mother!
(Logan groans. He grumbles as he sneaks around to avoid his sisters, and takes the trash out; Leni is coming and he puts the trash lid on the gum to hide it.)
Leni: Hey, Logan. Is my desk lamp in there? I can't find it anywhere.
Logan: Leni, it’s called a “desk lamp” for a reason. Where do you think it is?
Leni: (thinks) My… desk?
Logan: There you go.
Leni: Oh. (sees the lid on Logan’s head) What's up with that hat?
Logan: Oh, this? (striking a few poses) These are all the rage right now. I'm surprised you didn't know.
Leni: (inspired) Hmm…
(Logan sneaks back to the door to his room.)
Logan: Phew, I finally made it. And no one suspects a thing. (gets ready to open the door, but Lisa catches him)
Lisa: Greetings, human. There's Liquidambar Styraciflua in your follicular area.
Logan: Say what?
Lisa: You've got gum in your hair.
Logan: Oh, that. Well funny story. What happened is…
Lisa: I assume that being of average intelligence, you didn't place it there yourself. Therefore, I can only deduce that someone has been picking on you.
Logan: (threatening his genius sister) Lisa, you better not tell anyone about this! The last thing I want is you or anyone of our sisters getting involved.
Lisa: Don't worry. I do not have enough room in my brain for this kind of tomfoolery. (walks away)
Logan: Oh, thank goodness (enters his room and sighs relief)
Lincoln: (laying on his bed reading comics) Oh hey Logan. (notices the gum) Wait, is that…
Logan: Yes. It’s gum in my hair.
Lincoln: Ronnie Anne again, huh?
Lincoln: Do our sisters know about this?
Logan: Heck no! And let’s keep it that way. You know how our sisters get when they meddle. Now make yourself useful and cut this gum off my hair.
Lincoln: Alright, alright. (puts down his comic book and gets off from his bed)
(Lincoln takes the scissors and snips the gum out of Logan’s hair, but just as they were about to dispose of it, Lynn kicks the door open with every sister there.)
Lynn: You're being picked on!
Logan: (irritated) Lisa, you four-eyed rat! You said you weren't going to say anything!
Lisa: No. What I said was I did not have room in my brain for your secret. Hence, I removed it and transferred it to Lynn, whose brain apparently has ample room.
Lynn: Thanks. (beat) Hey!
Luna: So, you are being picked on!
Logan: (nervous) What? Me? Picked on? No, never.
Luan: (points to the gum) Then what's that?
Logan: Oh this? This is… um… it’s… uh… (looks at Lincoln) This is Lincoln’s gum!
Lincoln: What?! (Logan stuffs the gum in his mouth) I mean, uh yeah this is my gum. Thanks, Logan. (chews it trying to cover it up but obviously disgusted by it) Mmm… lemon mango. And hair! (coughs it out)
Logan: Dang it, Lincoln! You had one job! One! (the girls start demanding him to let them help him) Guys! Guys! Stay out of this! You'll only make it worse!
Lori: If by worse you mean better, I agree.
Logan: No, by worse I mean WORSE!
Lola: You should go straight to the school principal!
Lori: Forget that. You should literally text an embarrassing picture of him to all his friends.
Luan: I'm gonna write an insult comedy routine that will leave him in tears!
Logan: Well first off, (points at Lola) I’m not a snitch, (points at Lori) your plan is lame, (points at Luan) and just listening to your puns in general puts me into tears and not in a good way.
Luan: Hey! Save the roasting for the bully!
Lynn: (flips at Lincoln) Hoo-wah! (kicks him) Basic stealth ninja kick. That's how you're gonna take him down.
Logan: (groans, Lynn grabs him) Aw crud. (gets pulled away)
(Lincoln gives us an update on the weather of his life with storm clouds coming in over Logan’s face.)
SISTERNADO WARNING: CATEGORY 1 BUTTING IN
PRIMARY RISK: Making things worse for me
BREAKING NEWS: FIRST ALERT SEVERE SISTWISTER THREAT
Lincoln: Well, folks, the National Weather Service has just released a Category 1 Sisternado Watch. We advise boarding up your windows and preparing your emergency supplies. (dashes off to join the others)
Lynn: (has Logan in a hold) That's the camel clutch. Another good option for ya. (gets off him)
Logan: For the last time, I don't want any-
Leni: You know what you should do? You should tell that bully that he’s a big meanie and to stop picking on you.
Lola: Ooh I know! I'll invite him to a tea party and make him use the chipped cup! (has a sinister smile with a sinister sting to accompany it) I'm so evil, sometimes I scare even me.
Logan: (annoyed, facepalms) Oh for crying out loud. (notices Lynn standing in a strange pose) Lynn, what the heck are you doing?
Lynn: (pulls Logan's shirt over his face) Surprise mime attack! I invented that one myself.
Logan: (pulls his shirt back down) Lynn, I'm not gonna do it your way! I-
Lynn: Ugh! Fine! I'll take care of this myself. (walks off)
Luna: You should do this! (slams a pair of cymbals right in Logan's ears) His ears will be ringing for days!
Lucy: I say you should cast curse onto this bully. That will haunt him for all eternity.
Logan: (his ears still ringing) What?!
(Lynn returns with a boy and is carrying him by the seat of his pants.)
Lynn: Look! I found him!
(The girls surround him and are not very happy with him.)
Lori: How dare you bully our brother! Only we get to do that.
Logan: (sarcastic) Gee, that’s comforting.
Lana: (spits the gum right into Logan's hand) Smoosh your lemon mango gum in his hair, Logan!
Logan: (disgusted) Ew, Lana! Come on!
Lana: Fine. I'll do it.
Logan: No! Stop! This guy isn't my enemy! Although, thanks to you, he probably is now.
(The boy growls at him for what he's been put through.)
Lynn: Oh. (kicks the boy out) Why are you still here?
Lana: I can't believe I almost wasted perfectly good gum on him. (takes gum back and chews it)
Lynn: I'll go get another boy. (proceeds to do so)
Logan: (stops Lynn) No! Lynn, just stop! All of you just stop!
Lori: Logan, what is your problem?
Logan: My problem is all of you! I mean seriously, what part of “stay out of this, you’ll make things worse” do you guys not understand?!
Leni: The “worse” part.
Luna: We’re just trying to help you out, dude.
Lana: Yeah, let us teach that bully of yours a lesson or two.
Logan: How can you help me if you don’t even know who she is?!
Loud Sisters: SHE?!
Logan: Aw crud. (sighs) Yes the bully is a girl.
(The girls turn to Lincoln.)
Lincoln: It’s true.
(The girls are flabbergasted and gasp to hear the news, but then, all of them except Lisa start squealing with delight.)
Logan: (perplexed) Wait, what?
(All the girls except Lisa give Logan a big group hug and suffocate him.)
Lisa: Normally, I don't care for inane human emotions, but… (squeals just as delighted as they did and joins the hug)
Luna: Logan! Why didn't you tell us you had a girlfriend?
Lola: She sounds so pretty.
Logan: PRETTY?! What the heck are you guys even talking about?!
(They all release Logan from their hug.)
Lori: When a girl picks on you, that only ever means one thing: she likes you~.
(The girls all squeal again and Logan is just dumbfounded at this explanation.)
Logan: (Disbelieving) That is the most stupidest thing I have ever heard! She shoved a rat down my shirt! I covered in so many bite marks and scratches all over!
(The girls swoon over such a flirty prank.)
Leni: So romantic…
Lori: That's a classic.
Logan: Yep, it’s official. You idiots have lost your minds! This girl hates to the core! That’s why I'm seeing her later today to give her a piece of my mind!
Lori: You need to give her a piece of your heart instead.
Logan: (scared) My what?!
Leni: I think he needs to kiss her.
(Lily makes kissy faces in agreement.)
Logan: (petrified) Kiss who?!
Loud Sisters: Kiss her! Kiss her! Kiss her!
(At that moment, as the girls continue chanting Logan to kiss his bully, they all start forming miniature tornadoes around them and merge together to create the Sisternado; a weather warning pops up with the tornadoes taking over Logan space.)
SISTERNADO RED ALERT
Logan: This just in from the National Weather Service! The Sisternado watch has been upgraded to a Sisternado warning. Hit the deck!
Sisternado: Kiss her! Kiss her! (traps Logan inside) Kiss her! Kiss her!
(Lincoln quickly runs into his room. He comes back out carrying a lasso)
Lincoln: Hang on, Logan! I’ll get you out!
(Lincoln throws the lasso and manages to catch Logan. He pulls him out of the Sisternado. The boys then retreat into the bathroom to seek shelter.)
Logan: This is getting out of hand. What am I going to do?
Lincoln: Well unless you agree to kiss Ronnie Anne, they’ll never calm down.
Logan: What?! Are you insane!?
Lincoln: What other choice do we have?
Logan: I choose back up. (pulls out his phone and dials the number) Pick up,pick up,pick up,pick up,pick up,pick up!
Rusty: (answers his phone) Hello?
Logan: (panicking) Rusty, my sisters have gone insane! They think Ronnie Anne likes me! They want me to kiss her!
Rusty: Wait, seriously? Sweet!
Logan: SWEET?! What do you mean sweet?!
Rusty: I mean your sisters might be onto something. I say go for it.
Logan: You too?! Is there no one sane in this twisted world?!
Rusty: Logan, they're girls. If there’s one thing girls know it’s girl stuff.
Logan: Yeah, girl stuff! But this is Ronnie Anne we’re talking about! And the last time I check, she doesn’t qualify in girl stuff category! I mean come on! If there’s one thing Ronnie Anne isn’t, it’s girly! (suddenly gets an idea) Lightbulb.
Rusty: Uh, Logan?
Logan: (makes a sinister smile) On second thought, I think I will give it a shot.
Logan: Yeah. After all, how often does a guy get a chance to kiss a girl, right?
Rusty: Alright, Logan! Go get her, buddy!
Logan: Oh, I will. (hangs up the phone and chuckles sinisterly)
Lincoln: (concerned, to the viewers) Uh oh, something tells me he has something else planned.
(Logan goes out to confront the Sisternado.)
Sisternado: Kiss her! Kiss her! Kiss her!
(The Sisternado comes to a stop and the sisters turn back to normal.)
Logan: So, do guys honestly think that this chick is into me? (the sisters nod yes) Well then, are you guys going to help me seize my moment or what? (smirks)
(The girls sans Lisa squeal again.)
Lisa: Again… (squeals again)
Logan: It's 3:30. Lori, breath mint. (Lori puts it in his mouth) Lola, cologne. (Lola sprays some on him) Alright, it’s go time. (heads on out to meet Ronnie Anne)
Lynn: Go get her, Romeo.
Lori: You so got this, little bro.
Lola: Aw, our little Logan.
Lana: All grown up.
(Lola hands Lana a tissue for her to blow her nose.)
Leni: (wearing the trash lid on her head having believed Logan’s lie) All the bridesmaids should wear these hats at Logan wedding. These are all the rage right now.
(Logan steps outside, marches up to Ronnie Anne.)
Ronnie Anne: Alright, Logan, I’m here. So how do you settle this? We can either do the easy way or as I prefer (cracks her knuckles) the hard way.
Logan: Oh, Ronnie Anne. Sweet, lovable, Ronnie Anne. I actually have something else in mind.
Ronnie Anne: (confused) Huh? Lovable?
Logan: Instead of being at each other's throats as usual, I thought I use this opportunity to finally confess.
Ronnie Anne: Confess? About what?
Lori: Oh my gosh. Does Logan have feelings for her?
Logan: Now I know that I tend to be kind of a jerk towards, (blushes) but that’s because I have other feelings for you and didn’t know how to express them.
Ronnie Anne: (surprised, blushing) What?!
Lola: (squeals) He does have feelings for her!
Logan: (grabs Ronnie Anne’s hand) But now I have the confidence to finally tell you. (gets down on one knee) Something I’ve been dying tell you all day.
(Ronnie Anne started to look nervous. The girls gasp with excitement.)
Logan: Ronnie Anne…
Ronnie Anne: (blushing, nervous) Y-yeah?
Logan: See ya!
Ronnie Anne: (confused) What?
Loud Sisters: (confused) What?
(Logan jumps away from Ronnie Anne. She notice a beeping sound and sees she’s holding a bomb like device in her hand Logan grabbed. It goes off and splatters Ronnie Anne with green paint. Logan was laughing.)
Logan: (laughing) Oh man, I can’t believe you fell for that! You are so stupid! (laughing) The look on your face was priceless! You were all “Oh no, is Logan in love with?!” (laughing)
(Both Ronnie Anne and the Loud Sisters were flabbergasted of Logan’s little stunt.)
Logan: (sighs of relief) Oh that was good. That was really good. You know, when I mentioned you to my sisters, they said that you have a thing for me. I thought it was stupid and judging by the look on your face I’m not the only one who thinks so. Well, I had fun. Later.
(As Logan starts heading back inside, Ronnie Anne stops him by grabbing his shoulder. Logan turns around and sees a furious expression on her face.)
Logan: (scared) Aw crud.
(Ronnie Anne punches Logan in the face.)
Loud Sisters: (concerned) Ooh!
(Later in Lincoln & Logan’s room, Logan is on his bed with a black eye.)
Logan: (gently touches his black eye) Ow, ow, ow! (groans) Man, that girl hits hard.
Lori: Well you literally deserved it. I can’t believe you did that.
Logan: I still can’t believe she fell for it.
Luna: That was really harsh, dude.
Lola: Yeah, we told you to kiss her! Not give her a paint bomb!
Logan: And I told you guys you’re insane if you think she’s into me.
Luan: Well thanks to your little stunt, she probably hates you!
Logan: Uh hello, she already does hate me. Did you not hear me mention the rat incident?
Leni: Logan, you just don’t understand girls.
Logan: Oh whatever, you guys are just mad because you were wrong about the whole thing.
Lynn: Oh forget! You’re hopeless!
(Lily blows raspberries in agreement)
Lori: Come on, girls. Let’s leave Logan to enjoy his so called victory.
Logan: Thank you.
(The girls leave the room.)
Lincoln: Well, I hope everything was worth it.
Logan: Oh it was totally worth it.
Lincoln: Even though Ronnie Anne slugged out?
Logan: Still worth it.
Lincoln: Okay then. Hey I’m gonna grab myself a soda. You want one?
Logan: Yeah, sure. Just don’t get me diet.
(Lincoln leaves the room. Someone whistles from outside to get Logan’s attention.)
Logan: Hm? (looks out his window on one end as a rock comes flying in through the other end and sees there's a note attached to it and reads it) “Dear, Lame-o. I just want to say that little stunt you pulled was pretty good. Harsh, but good.” Huh, didn’t expect her to be sportsmen like. “I really didn’t expect you to go all Romeo on me. That caught me off guard.” That was really clever of me. “Sorry for slugging you. As for your sisters, they were right about one thing.” Wait, what? “Here’s my number?” “Text me?!” “XOXO, RONNIE ANNE?!” (Surprised, looks out the window and gets a steak thrown at his eye; notices it has a note too and reads it) “For your eye. Hope it helps?”
(Logan was utterly confused. But as he thought about it, he smiles hopefully. He places steak over his black eye.)
Logan: I guess Ronnie Anne really does like me. (realized something) Wait, if Ronnie Anne likes me? Then that means… (gasp) Oh, oh no. (facepalms, groans and lays down on his bed) That means my sisters were right about the whole thing. (gasp, gets up) If they find about this, they’ll never let me live this down. I can’t let them know about this! They must never know about this! NEVER!
(Something else get through Logan’s window. Logan sees an object wrapped in paper. He unravels the paper and sees that it was another note. He reads it.)
Logan: “P.S. It’s payback time?”
(Logan got confused about that last statement. He then turned his attention to the object and sees that it was some small device. The device went off and triggers an alarm. Logan jumped out shock and tried to shut it off. He then dropped it on the floor and stomped on. He eventually breaks it, shutting of the alarm.)
(His siblings rush into his room.)
Lori: Logan, are you okay?!
Luan: We heard a loud commotion and for once it wasn’t from any of us.
Lincoln: What happened?
Logan: I’m fine! Everything is fine.
Lucy: (notices the steak) Hey, where did you get that steak?
Lana: (notices something on the floor) What are these? (picks up Ronnie Anne’s notes)
Logan: (panicking) No, don’t!
(The Loud Siblings read the notes. They all were flabbergasted and gasp to what they have just read. They all look at Logan. All the girls started to slowly smile and eventually making a full grin.)
Lincoln: (knew where this was going) Sorry, Logan. You’re on your own on this one. (dashes off)
Logan: Oh, that’s what she meant by payback. Aw crud.
(The girls burst out of the room as a Sisternado squealing with Logan trapped inside screaming.)
Logan: (angry) Curse you, Ronnie Anne! CURSE YOU!!!
(From outside, Ronnie Anne heard the whole thing.)
Ronnie Anne: (giggles, sighs) I love it when he’s angry. It’s so cute.