though truthfully it's not a terrible metaphor, as I've been stuck in this prolonged process of recovering /pulling my life back together; every time I start feeling like I could maybe handle it, I lose my footing again
so I never managed to reach a stage where I felt like I had enough 'extra' to be active anywhere
but also it's apparent I need to force myself to do things or I will keep hiding forever!!
I do want to return here, and hopefully soon; I'll keep trying
I actually started on a self-portrait last week to update my portfolio, which tbh is the first real painting I've managed to invest in in years... and even though self-portraits are a rough place to start lol it's really reminded me how much I used to love painting, so I think it's a good sign I'm getting back on the right track! hopefully I'll have something to share with everyone soon
I feel you so much girl. I've been in a similar state of mind for a couple of years, and whenever you think you've clawed yourself out something new hits (such as this pandemic). It's so hard to channel creativity under the circumstances, you can't simply force it like other types of work. I hope you don't let it get to your feelings of self-worth. You're an absolutely brilliant artist and have given so much joy to fellow fans of the IE games. Take care out there and thank you ever so much for giving us a sign of life after all - we were really worried.