Shop Forum More Submit  Join Login
Contrails
cross skies
like bridges;
board-walks built
between clouds
in the blue --

Or pull
as patchwork stitches,
patterns cast in winds adrift
to wash upon earth

As sails:
a canvas to cover oceans
beyond the bridges
in the blue.
Updated: 05/01/2010 @ 15:50
Project2010: 009 of 375 (January 5th)



A short entry after watching a plane fly past my window.

It's quickly-composed in less than half an hour, and a little rough around the edges; I have been told that this one isn't very good. That would be something that'd usually stop me from releasing the work but following precedent would go against this increasingly difficult challenge I have set myself.

Work might start entering straight into scraps before long; either that, or I'll revert to my original intention of producing photography only.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconlimnides:
limnides Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2010   Artist
It being stuffed into a comment with no physical cues of breaks lead me to read it in different metre. It was hard to understand and even when I attempted to create the breaks myself. and I was wrong, hah. I broke on different lines that what I see before me. :B

This has an air of surreality to it. Almost in line with something I'd imagine Dalí painting.
Reply
:iconarctoa:
arctoa Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2010  Student Photographer
Yeah, yeah. Yak yak yak.

Dali, hmm? I can live with that.
Reply
:iconcorvidophiliac:
corvidophiliac Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2010
I have been told that this one isn't very good.

I don't know about that. Is the quality up to par with your best pieces? Well, no. But that could be said for a number of things, couldn't it.
In all, I'm not sure I find it terribly comparable to your usual writing.
It's light, child-like. Not in a juvenility sort of way, but in its nature; the simple state of observation.

I rather like it.
Reply
:iconarctoa:
arctoa Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2010  Student Photographer
I rather like it too, ahaha. Despite the simplicity that you've accurately described. It is what it is, I wasn't trying to be grand or pretentious about what I was doing. It's just a statement upon an observation I had. I guess that's the definition of what dA calls Journal Poetry, but placing it in such sticks it straight into Scraps.
Reply
:iconcorvidophiliac:
corvidophiliac Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2010
Perhaps you could do more, and publish a book of postmodern children's poetry. Ahah.

I've always wondered about that; why exactly is it called "journal" poetry, and why is it that they don't consider them to be finished/complete enough pieces?
Reply
:iconarctoa:
arctoa Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2010  Student Photographer
Ahah, that would be an interesting collection.

I'm not entirely sure but there should be some sort of section for observational poetry and it shouldn't pass straight to jail.

I mean, Scraps. Eh, I end up sticking almost everything into what they've coined Human Nature.
Reply
Add a Comment:
 
×

:iconarctoa: More from arctoa


More from DeviantArt



Details

Submitted on
January 5, 2010
File Size
400 bytes
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
628
Favourites
3 (who?)
Comments
6