archaii

i often dream that we're sky pirates - flying through the clouds on impossible dreams, high on unbridled smiles. we would keep going higher until we transcended the world, and left it all behind - breaking out on our own - two astronauts who have never been in space before.

we're up to our knees in rushing water, you turn back to smile at me and it reaches your eyes. the current threatens mutiny, but you're there and smiling as if nothing is wrong. fearfully frozen; a vision of being pulled under, free to let go, a ransom to be paid. i mumble something; no doubt searching for childhood pets and long buried parents. we would have been holding hands once, but not today, you are so far ahead - dancing carelessly through the deluge. there are some things we'll never do together - ice skating, bedtime stories, throwing plates maybe some words we'll never get to say.

kiss me, only me, wrap your arms around me like a noose, catch my breath for me, and take it away. your lips glisten, dripping with pity, they strike glass words, shattered into shards, dishonest affairs. dismantle my perfections, like clockwork, take me apart, leave me in pieces, inadequate. throw out your electric nets, asphyxiate every part of me, just to acquire a lustful piece. cauterise my gushing wounds, my empty veins, with your blazing touch, ignited from small dancing sparks. leave your mask on, your eyes could write love letters, but your lips could break the illusion, let me have this.

when i lean against you, the thick, warm rush of it echoes inside me, dancing around the edges of my rib-cage - aching for a path to freedom. shivering teeth, skeleton white cheek-bones, eyes wide, knuckles gripped - burning the mask until it slips, it seeps inside breathless lips, desperate for redemption. it tastes sweet, but it screams bitter. it's you, but it's not you. those crushed rose petals, when you asked for devil-may-care daisies. i promise to listen, just whisper violently, shake the foundations of my reality, climb inside the darkness, and stretch it out until it fits, around you - effortlessly. unleash

his touch works against her like mutinous sandpaper; rough; unyielding- skin on shark leather, a cage of violent flesh and dishonest bones. the air between them is static and chilled, like his eyes, and she remembers, his magnetic presence pulsing behind her, next to her, inside her, against her- when she looks in the unrepentant mirror, it frosts over, to escape, like she wishes she could, and it shatters, like she wishes she could, falls away, and breaks apart, like she wishes she could, the little shards dancing and spinning through the stagnant air, looking up, and reflecting his eyes back at her. let's say that he has a

we're centre stage, and ghost-lit, as we recite our well-rehearsed sentences. our lines perfected by casualties of the heart. violent words drip down your devil-may-care tongue; like acidic bullets down the barrel of a gun; hollow, pointless, self-mutilating, an itinerary of critical shrapnel just waiting to be fired. smoky, warm and confused verbs, mystify envious nerves lying in wait, beneath captivated skin. the hollow words echo within me, reverberating against the walls i've buried myself beneath, they ricochet with endless, piercing quiet. your stare, hauntingly commanding, binds and sears flesh to bone, with blazing wire

bleed me dry and saturate my veins instead in awkward intimacy; and liken my cowardly escapes to calculated retreats- so you never have to write me off your list of guardian angels. your breath liberates itself with distorted celerity. you're made of barbed wire, but i just can't let go, embracing you inside, it's slicing my organs into ribbons, and diluting my gazes with irregular fantasies. you're just a shimmering ghost of freudian aesthetics. there's a thin line between low self-esteem and the apocalypse. this stake you've driven through my heart is as much a part of me, as the skeletons in my closet and your devil-may-care lips

rewrite my scars to break the tortured archetype you never wanted, i'll forget how dishonesty can break spirits, i'll forget how it felt to be abandoned, i'll forget what it means to commit suicide. there are two sides to every story, heads or tails, as if you could actually make a decision, where you had to rely on faith or luck. we're on a narrow path, sheltered by our blind spots, each other, all for the sake of going in a direction, but still too co-dependent to have a destination. you're never meant to achieve your wildest dreams, because your darkest fear is having nothing to care about, but no-one tells you what to do when

sink into the stubborn floorboards with me, the only thing that we can drown in is each other, with our flooding pity and sympathy, consuming free will and fantasies. i feel like i'm so far below the surface, the pressure is crushing me in every direction, like heaven and hell are standing united against me, like my entire world is in perpetual immobilising gravity, but it's only you. the only way to understand beauty is to destroy it, take it apart, make it incomplete, to marvel at its insides, dismantle it in ways ensuring it can never be reborn, it's why we fall to pieces when our fingertips touch. asphyxiation is the path to

watch me watching you, locked gazes, like locked cellar doors, "this is for my own good", if i say it enough, you'll believe it, like you believe in fate and insecurities. i'm hearing the scars you wear so proudly, carried harshly through your vocal cords, lashing out with whips of contradictions, "i just want you to be happy", but i'm glad you're viciously stubborn. lead me down the primrose path, between unfaithful mirrors, and that feeling of disaster lurking just out of eyesight. it's hard to swallow your empty words, on an empty stomach. let me seep inside the chinks in your armour, and infect you, behind enemy lines, wi