aratak

So it's been a few months since I last wrote anything here, and it turned out to be the translated lyrics of a song. I guess I don't feel like this is a personal place where I can write about myself much. A lot has changed, and happened, but none of that actually matters. We're all living creatures standing on a blue ball in the middle of nothing, and we're all going to die sooner or later. HAH.
Life is coming back to normal for a lot of people, and those are their lives and it's okay, and I have doubts about everything and that's just what normal people do and have.

I know I'm not the only one thinking the way I think about things, but sometimes it's like perceiving an entirely different dimension some people have no idea it's even there. And they are stuck and there's nothing to do about it I'm not into drugs and being an alcoholic.

Grouper is coming to play here this year, which sort of completes the list of everything I needed to see live. Maybe I won't be so obsessed with [her] music after. Maybe it'll be worse. For now, it just calms me down. It reminds me of VALIS a lot, which I thought would get away, I've read like a dozen good books since. It's like past all the bullshit, and past all thought, and all the bullshit again, and all clearance of mind and spirit, and all the bullshit that comes after that, there should still be something left. Pure knowledge. And whatever it is, it's completely rogue and powerless.


To sleep tonight I will try listening to Selvaggina Go Back Into the Woods, and think about Jhonn and all he meant for a bit. And ponder if a tattoo with the Coil symbol little sticky man is a good idea.

I'm so, so tired.


I wanna live in a bathysphere