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About Deviant iohes de eyck me fecit.Female/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 10 Years
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this morning my heart woke
me up to tell me you're taking
your piece with you when you go,
tugging at the distance as your
plane left the runway and i wrenched into
the darkness you left me for and i swore
i could see the stars falling down around me
the minute i said your name and it echoed,
my god, the syllables sunk deep into the pit
of my stomach and rested there like seeds,
watered by the nights i spent telling what was left
of me to forget all of you while my insides
tried to figure out how to be less, necessarily
it never worked. it never does when you
treat hearts like candy bars, like pieces
you deserve to break off & take with you
like the chocolate centre of my soul i gave
you, instead of my blown glass shattering,
the battery that keeps me thinking about
my live wires at the edges where you picked
up & left; you had me making signal fires -
everything went up in smoke and
i found myself on the edge of arson
where i want to burn everything
down at the site, where i want to b
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 13 2
last season's mix tapes
in every story, there is a plot.  
this is called “what happens.”  
what happens is usually someone dies and someone rebuilds, someone buys a wedding ring and maybe she says yes.  
what happens is we lose touch.  
what happens is we stop at the laundromat, and i don’t know if i am inventing the men smoking cigars on the porch, or if it is really thursday. what happens is i am nine and you are a few years older and we are in the laundromat with three baskets full of clothes.
what happens is my parents are waiting in the car and we have quarters weighing down our pockets and we are grown up as we press coins into the slots on the washing machines. we giggle because we are the youngest occupants of the one large room lined with washers and dryers, and we giggle and we wait for the buzzers. we grow unsteady, confused, younger as we realise that we have been wrong. suddenly we are infants and we glance around the room and we feed more quarters into the
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 16 4
leaving the nest
i dreamed of
growing up a
willow but
didn't budge
from the oak
grove, stayed
unsubtle &
strong. where i
tried to feather
out my edges
i stayed firm
& full coarse.
where i tried
to love i lost
limbs & shed
another layer
of calloused
skin. where i
tried to weep
gracefully i
kept tripping
over my own
roots, kept on
sobbing some
thing awful.
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 18 22
reclaiming boston
on the bus with my
legs sprawled over my bags, i
imagine the miles
falling away from
me like hydrangea petals
in a summer breeze
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 15 9
e street shuffle
daylight whitens the scars of the hasty
reenactment, the perfunctory funk
of traincar graffiti crews hunkered over
backalley dumpsters making the news
humdrum the creation never undone, the hard-
won that stays because it stays unseen,
becomes routine, becomes
the sheen of art school dreams
still visible beneath the filth of city streets,
a fantasy decaying in its frame
& heedless with age under the superficial
rage of the blindly worked & blindly paid,
systematic slaves to factories where they make
but don't create, where graffiti is the only
god left to praise, where capitalists' fingers weighed
down with rings snap, start to sway,
pay to have it washed away, begin
to annihilate the day.
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 13 10
love the yarn, love the bestseller
falling for you in december was a cold fiction, myth
rich & beautiful like the frost weighing down the tip
of every blade of grass in the mornings, like heather's
house late at night, bushes swollen thick & obscuring
the street signs, with me scouring evergreen lane
for numbers, waiting for a flicker of the porchlight,
yelling her name to find out i had driven around
evergreen court in stupid sooty circles, down the street
from falling with you in december, when i was trailing
you by entire revolutions, when without your name i
thought i could hunt down your heart in the dark,
when without you i scratched the fable of our love
onto a brick in a house i'll admit i knew wasn't yours.
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 16 10
lose your self by anyimacielgray lose your self :iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 17 10
to giovanna cenami
mother goddess,
your whole deep greens
& your pale yellow slivers of sun
& then the blue sky sleeves
with your open fertile hands blossoming
out of them, small & serene.
your gaze a red innocence, heavy with curiousity
& need.
the white
white veil
won't dare
touch your
cheek bones.
it graces your glowing forehead, forgotten entirely
after the shock of love in your glance.
you know this man's  
profound black browns, his steady eye
the flickering immodest uncaring of calculation
hung over his lids, over the hazy grey
of city sky, this hard bent man stooped
with briefcase in hand, thickly
cloaked, thin lipped, top hatted.
you the warm unnamed bride & he
the sharp nosed Man
you the pleasant & powerful, indulgent
of his every little
lovely evil,
the eternal forgiveness in the curve
of your lips, the unspoken
colour of power. you the patient
the unending source.
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 72 29
i've swallowed continents en masse, & all
their statues too, or their shot glasses (i
admit to a collection) or their calls,
their laughs & hiccups, ornaments in piles
on trees – the odd ingredient in pies
& tickets to museums & that night itch
of metaphysics' batty evil eye.
i listen for the strange ways we debrick
each other, say hello, craft whole triptychs
of queries after dogs & aunts, i wake
with elbows bruised from who knows which
event i tripped into (but i would bake
forever while you read me nietzsche or
the dialogues or charmed me to the floor)
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 15 19
with a single match tossed over the potomac
reckless clouds sky-streaked
slapdash - the whole mess spilled with
oil & lit on fire
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 5 11
i call the basket weaver mother so
she'll curl into my future self but time
does not go lending me a favour, knows
whose accusations fray its essence (mine
might be the least inspired) but she will find
the centre of my soul outside of days,
each reed she plaits a branch of my lifeline
in disbelief of past or coming age.
she grows indefinite & kneeling, prays
with spokes & palms repeated into sky,
each revolution of the wicker maze
another texture for the looping i -
the cursive of this self she'll craft beyond
the memories of selves i'll have, i've lost.
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 12 8
Towards Peace
the Means of Peace, betwixt the Government
almost ever worse than the Disease:
of Justice in the Hands and Mouths of the
Aggressors seldom getting what they seek.
fading enjoyments of this Lower World:
and Greatness of Dominion more than Right
     Men seek their Wills by War rather than Peace
     embrewed their Hands in one another's Blood:
     as they will violate it to obtain
     Possession of Princes and People too.
     Perhaps it may be in a good Degree
     not to destroy the Lives of Men: to give
     as War cannot in any sense be just
     the Maker and Preserver of our Peace
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 1 0
beware of
you my dumpy little cockroach
my forgotten bit of red glass
my not mine
the beautiful driftwood
see how i've made you heavy,
see how i've planted my fingers into the deepness of the deepness & fluttered my eyelids for effect but how i've read the braille of earth & found out your ten thousand names & misplaced just one or two into a decaying notebook once green by incident, by accident.
i'm sorry about calling you a giddy swellbellied politician & about forgetting most of your names. but the nice bit of it is, look, i can figure a language assembled of clicks & berries.
maybe if it's raspberry plickblack pop. pop.
maybe i shouldn't swaddle you in names maybe
i don't want to letter you into a cage
see how i've called you instead by my swelling eyes.
see how the unfolding of my hand
becomes you.
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 13 7
faking halloween: a family pastime
vava drives her old camry smack yellow on the double line. this car's as old as i am i say lisping over plastic vampire teeth & she presses together her purple dry-flower lips humming oh yes – 92 – she counts her feelings in orange lollipops, she arranges the wrapped candy into an elegant JAMES on top of vavo's grave & the trees have gone greening themselves but it doesn't matter, otherwise she'll never sleep so we keep a costume handy all year & black face paint just in case she grows blue underneath her april umbrella.
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 9 6
here is a photograph of a car window during the late day.
it was taken on a cell phone.
the car is light champagne & its window reflects trees.
& it reflects a few words smoothed in with a thin finger
faintly on the inside of a foggy pane
too faintly so you tilt yourself inside the memory.
& it reflects a few words we love you will
you spill into it slowly, in reverse, all of you at once.
here is a man in a black suit & tie.
he is telling you where to park your car.
human beings standing up like ants
unfolding their creaking legs & waiting to be devoured.
human beings or ant beings standing up to talk about it.
we are being devoured they say.
nos están devorandos.
they put their ant hands to their faces.
oh they say
ay ay
we love you will. why
we love you. human beings crawling over each other's tears.
collapsing on top with sobs for the warmth of another body.
there are two faces, one his & one no longer his.
human beings examining his exoskeleton. this physical
stuff. you gr
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 6 0
for my mother, for whom i am never careful enough
i always thought if i kept still enough or grew two
dimensional enough i could tip myself over into space:
honest, bones, i could shrug at gravity & join with you
to fashion a rubber duck for the great & terrible zeus
a universe wide, tipping earth precisely in the right ways.
i always thought if i kept still enough or grew two
orchids, carefully, the way my mother often tried to,
she wouldn't die thinking i refuse to carry her face,
honest bones i could shrug at gravity & join with you.
i walk fast without breaking her back – i can love, too:
oh, mother, your beloved & bitchy brace face, space case,
i always thought if i kept still enough or grew two
new toes, i wouldn't bother about the others being blue
with your poor circulation, or other bizarre malaise,
honest bones i could shrug at gravity & join with you.
but i won't go to space & i promise to wear rain boots.
don't worry if i get arrested at a protest by mistake.
i always thought if i kept still enough or grew two
:iconanyimacielgray:anyimacielgray 159 37

Random Favourites

Water Lilies
I say good-bye to the water lilies
and all the promises they hold
          [pastels, drifting on the bloom]
Disguised among cattails and nails
but unhidden, the lilies
          [pour into a white mold
           a spiked apparition]
Of the end, floating under the moon.
          [that spoke and said not a thing
           of you]
:iconthefoolscribe:thefoolscribe 4 5
Last summer I loved a girl, phoenix haired
and fox heart, who kindled a fire in my eye.
Last summer, a girl, I loved—.
No, that is wrong… it was one-sided
like a blank canvas.
The dance of highways and highways
and interstates and airways got boring.
I imagine we both stayed up late crafting pleasure, wondering.
A song, I wrote for her.
I wrote a song:
Dancing like an automobile, dancing like an automobile,
treading tires like an automobile all over your body.

Fueled on one kiss,
the flight to Louisiana to see the girl who thought me a half-genius
was tedious. It was a smooth flight.
She saw me not with her eyes
but a Nikon lens, unfocused.
Waking in the guestroom,
there was no sunlight.
Some days…
I think I woke in my heart.
Flying back I cried silently
all the way, reading the book by Faulkner that hates women
and when I finished
:iconthefoolscribe:thefoolscribe 6 4
Wonderland. by hauntingmewithsmiles Wonderland. :iconhauntingmewithsmiles:hauntingmewithsmiles 9 19
Theory of Everything
shooting an elephant couldn't be worth it, but i
clutched this rectangular ivory cousin to my heart and considered
the asymmetry of relativity and the tiles and how i never
learned to place them without standing them on their
teeth and closing my eyes when i pushed the saddest of
stars away, these abandoned children of the second
superstring revolution.
i can't speak for the moon but
sometimes i wish i could tie myself up to understand what it
looks like when i vibrate and topple into the blooming, vibrant
world of clock towers and their beloved lighthouses, traveling
into someone else's novel.
i line dominoes up on the top of washing machines while i
wait for my clothes to find the end of this helix, for the manifestation
of widespread anarchy, for this narcolepsy to declare its coup. when
i explain these things i tie them into circles that fell each other
while i sit with a dirty shirt and no way to describe the lattice of
our cleanest slates, the crisscrossed life lines and
:iconcynicalxpoet:cynicalxpoet 9 22
The Purple Bottle by HattTrick The Purple Bottle :iconhatttrick:HattTrick 24 76 technicolor by bailey--elizabeth technicolor :iconbailey--elizabeth:bailey--elizabeth 1,153 376 Dinohippososcerious by HattTrick Dinohippososcerious :iconhatttrick:HattTrick 8 52
I think I've always wanted
to be that girl for you.
I want to be the one who
has to remind you to breathe,
to be the one who has to
beat your heart for you —
it won’t beat on its own —
and I want to be the one
to keep filing away
at the scales
which superimpose themselves
over your skin.
I want to be the one you
because I’ve never been good
at being the one you
:iconvideotaped:videotaped 3 6
Sometimes we're poaching,
we're poaching it all,
and all of us are hoping,
we're hoping you blow it.
We would love nothing more than
to see you explode for
absolutely no reason
to the ignorant observer.
We would like to propose
a toast Hoorah Three Cheers
We're driving down your spirits today,
and when you wonder and begin to ask why
remember to stop and realize that you should
not be asking those kind of questions if you
ever hope to be satisfied with the world around
asking why is the same thing as wanting
to continue
asking why is the same thing as every
other thing
asking why not is the best thing of all
one day you will begin to
no longer understand
that is the day we are waiting for.
That is the day you can expect our call.
We hope you brush your teeth before you go to bed.
We hope you pray to some sort of God or maybe even
to a firm belief in the absence of one.
We hope you never remember what you ate for dinner
last night.
We hope you sometimes wa
:iconnotoday:Notoday 4 10
Distant Heartbeats by bigcitydreams Distant Heartbeats :iconbigcitydreams:bigcitydreams 157 25 Midnight Cobwebs by bigcitydreams Midnight Cobwebs :iconbigcitydreams:bigcitydreams 72 10 i've lost my mind. by bailey--elizabeth i've lost my mind. :iconbailey--elizabeth:bailey--elizabeth 1,221 237 La la land by vampire-zombie La la land :iconvampire-zombie:vampire-zombie 512 34 There was this blue door and by vampire-zombie There was this blue door and :iconvampire-zombie:vampire-zombie 521 33





iohes de eyck me fecit.
United States

love that's all

favourite genre of music: everything, operating system: borrowed spleen, shell of choice: turtle, favourite cartoon character: calvin and hobbes, personal quote: I'VE HELD MANY A BABY WHILE THE HOMEGIRL GOT HER SCRAP ON


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ei9 Featured By Owner May 1, 2018
Happy Early Birthday wishes to you and may it be a most wonderful one!
ei9 Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2017
Happy Early Birthday next week my dear and may it be a most beautiful and blessed one!
ei9 Featured By Owner May 6, 2016
Early birthday wishes goes out to you and may it be totally fabulous!
ei9 Featured By Owner May 7, 2015
Happy Birthday to you and may it be as sweet and lovely as your great poetry and writing!
mel-dickinstein Featured By Owner Feb 23, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
ive always been a fan of your work. keep up the awesome work. you are definitely an inspiration! :heart:
ei9 Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2014
 great writing and poetry that you got here and its awesome with a capital A!
I have a few of your masterpieces in my faves and look forward seeing more from you in the future. keep up the great work and God bless!
spartan-locke Featured By Owner May 7, 2014   Traditional Artist
Happy Birthday!
TheEmptyChest Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2013

Tag a quality deviant, You’re it! Quality doesn’t mean that you have a lot of followers, or a lot of messages. It means that you’re nice to other people, and you deserve to be happy. If you get this message, someone is telling you that they love you as you are, and they don’t care how much followers you have. Send this to 10 deviants who deserve it. If you break the chain, nothing will happen. But it’s just good to let someone know that you love them! ♥

(Just thought you deserved this.)

anyimacielgray Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2013
thank you so so much! i will definitely pass this on <3
TheEmptyChest Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2013
:huggle: Good!
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