WARNING: This is a crossover with Fifty Shades of Grey but it isn't really approving of it (at all). If you are fans of the books/movie you are free not to read this but for those that are going to read the story BE AWARE THAT THE READER USED TO BE ONE OF CHRISTIAN'S SUBMISSIVES. So you know what that means.
Safe - Dean Winchester x Reader (Office AU) - Part 2
"Mr. Winchester-" you started speaking, voice barely audible but the look - or more like glare - he shot you made you shut up. You pursed your lips and looked down at your hands. He poured some more whisky into his glass and turned to look at you, taking a seat on the couch opposite you.
"Please-" your voice was soft "-You've had enough drinks for today. The bottle is almost empty." you said, always worried about his well-being no matter how you were.
"I'll stop drinking when you tell me the truth" he said sternly and once again you averted your eyes from his.
How could you tell him?
After his 'surprise' to visit you previous boss, Christian Grey, you had not stopped shaking but you tried not to make it too obvious to him anyway. He had gotten really worried when he saw the way you reacted to even the sight of the Enterprises. It seemed as if you were on the verge of having a panic attack, all color drained of your face and tears never stopping to roll your eyes as if you were in immense pain. You could still vividly remember how you had felt, as well, because that was always a feeling he brought to you. You shook your head and tried to push the thought of him away but no matter how many times or how hard you tried you never succeeded.
If it wasn't for Dean, though, you didn't know where you'd be right now. He had managed to effectively break your trail of thoughts and bring you out of a situation you never wanted to be again in. The memories were so vivid that it felt as if you were again in that place... with him. As if all the things he had done to you in the past so many times were being repeated. And you hated it.
One thing was for sure, other than how much all those memories hurt. It was that if it wasn't for the man in front of you, Dean, then you would had never been able to stand on your own feet ever again.
Sure, once he saw the condition you were in, Dean didn't miss a beat to scoop you up and walk you to the car - after you told him not to go inside the building for help. After that, though, you were surprised to find him not wanting to let go of you - not that you wanted to let go of him either. You had never felt more safe in a man's arms than his. He held onto you during the whole ride, or more like you held onto him while his arms were constantly around you, but you were stunned to find out once opening your eyes that you were at his place. You had passed out for a while because you felt exhausted. All of those memories flashed back; making you feel as if you were actually back there experiencing all of those things that you had long ago tried to run away from. It drained every bit of energy you had, just like when you would actually go through it in the past, so you weren't really surprised to find yourself fading in and out of consciousness every now and then.
But it wasn't just him taking care of you now that you owed him. It was much more. You started working in the Winchester Enterprises once you had quit from your job at the Grey Enterprises as Christian's personal assistant. The pain, both emotional and physical, of what had happened between you and him was still there like a fresh wound he had made (both metaphorically and literally) that had not healed yet. You met Dean just a few days after you started working on the Winchester Enterprises and you could not be more happy about it. The man was amazing in every meaning of the word. He always managed to make you laugh, even if you weren't feeling like it, and he always managed to make you forget. You could never realize how quickly time passed by when you were at work and every time, you remember clearly, you couldn't wait for the next day to come so that you would get to work again and of course see Dean. You soon realized you had many things in common and therefore a friendship formed quickly between the two of you. Of course for you he became much more but you doubted he felt that way, even though he would not stop flirting with you.
It was evening anymore. Dean had let you sleep in his bed for a good few hours, after the doctor recommending you to, and you gave into your guilty pleasure. Although you wanted to deny it, because Dean was your boss, you had always caught yourself daydreaming about how it would be to lay in Dean's soft-looking bed. The bed from which many times you dragged him in the mornings. To cover yourself with the same blankets he did, to lay under the blankets he did - many times not wearing much. To bury your face in the soft white pillows he laid his head on and breath in his scent that seemed to be imprinted on them. You wanted, even for a moment, to feel as if he actually was there with you his arm wrapped around your waist protectively and the same feeling of safety washing over you. You wanted, even if it was not true, to feel as if that's where the two of you belonged, with him looking at you while you were sleeping and running his fingers through your hair and over your cheeks. Something that at some point you felt happening but brushed off as just a fraction of your imagination.
Once you had woken up, or at least felt as if you could stand on your own feet, you got up and made your way to the living room were you found Dean in the situation he was now. Drinking. You had tried to argue, of course, to stop him from drinking more but all he did was insist on you telling him the truth as to why you had almost passed out back there. Every time, though, you tried to change the subject and manage not to answer his question.
You could not tell him the truth. How could you?
How could you tell him of all the things Christian had did to you with your own concession? No, you certainly couldn't. Who knew what Dean was going to think of you.
Maybe he would fire you. That certainly was something you did not want at all. Not because of the money but because of the happiness it brought to you to work with this man. He was like no boss you've ever had before - certainly not Christian - and you didn't want this to end here.
"(Y/n)?" Dean's voice broke you long trail of thoughts.
"I-" you opened your mouth but no more words could be formed.
You took in a deep breath and dared to look at him "I-I'm sorry, Mr. Winchester. But I can't. It's nothing you should worry yourself with and certainly not important."
"Not important?" he looked at you in disbelief "(Y/n) you were about to have a panic attack back there. Do you have any idea how you looked? Do you have any idea that you seemed as if you were about to have a heart attack? Do you have any idea that you were a wreck? Do you have any idea how fucking worried I got seeing you like that and not knowing what to do? Do you have any idea how crazy I'm going not knowing what's going on with you? Do you?!" he all-but-shouted as you only stared at him wide-eyed.
"I-" you swallowed the lump in your throat "I'm sorry for worrying you Mr. Winchester. I should have probably just left earlier as well" you mumbled and got up from the couch.
Dean let out a sigh "Damn it, (Y/n). You know I don't mean that." he spoke in a much softer voice, letting his glass on the table and coming by your side.
He held onto your shoulders and forced you to sit.
"(Y/n), I just want to know the truth. I promise I'm not going to judge or say anything for that matter. Just, hell, I want to know what's going on. I've never seen you like that before, sweetheart" he said, voice softer than you'd heard him ever before, and one of his hands moved to cup you cheek; his thumb brushing over it and making you blush.
"I-" it seemed like the only thing you could say lately.
"Come on, tell me. Does it have to do with Grey?" he asked and before you could hold yourself you flinched at the mention of his name, just like you did every time he would hit you with some whip.
"(Y/n)?" Dean's voice was heard but it sounded distant as all the memories started coming back again, along with the tears.
"(Y/n)?" he sounded more worried "(Y/n) what's going on, please talk to me!" he was frantic now. He cupped your face and forced you to look at him. The sobs that had started shaking your whole body were now lessening as you found yourself gazing at the man you had fallen in love over the course of time.
The tears did not stop, though.
"(Y/n) please calm down and tell me" he said looking at you with a deep frown.
"I- I can't. I'm sorry but I can't Mr. Winchester. Please not yet. Please don't make me say it. I- I-" you shook your head, tears still rolling, and buried your face in your hands "It hurts"
"Oh (Y/n)" Dean said and wrapped his arms around you, standing still till you calmed down.
"I-I'm fine, Mr. Winchester. You don't have to worry about me" you mumbled pushing him away "I- I just need some time to calm down. Yeah that's what I need." you said mostly trying to convince yourself.
"Then take a shower" he said and you looked at him frowning "Come on, take a shower. It will help" he said and taking your hand he led you upstairs.
"N-no, Mr. Winchester. I can't. I really can't. I've already overstayed my welcome. I should probably be already leaving" you tried to reason with him.
He merely scoffed "Bullshit. No you haven't. I brought you here to be sure that you are alright and you're not leaving until I say so. I'm the boss after all. And now I say that you should take a shower. Come on. I'll have some clothes waiting here for you wen you get out." he said with a forced smile that he obviously put on to lighten the mood.
"Don't worry. Just take your time and relax. And if you don't want to, we don't have to talk about it" he said and the only thing you could do was stare at him like a love-struck teenager "I'll be downstairs, making something for us to eat later, ok?" he asked and you gave him a small nod.
You made your way to his room and then the bathroom, after sneaking a last glance at him, and closed the door behind you. You rested your forehead against it for a while and took in a deep breath to try calm down your nerves. You ran a hand through your hair and after a final sigh you started undressing to take that much-needed shower.
You walked down the stairs after having taken a long shower. You took your time, that was for sure, but you couldn't stop yourself from looking around and trying to take in as much as possible from Dean's room.
You hadn't really payed attention to how it was earlier, but now that you had time and were actually feeling better, why not? It was elegant, that was for sure, not too luxurious or expensive but really modern. You'd say it quite fitted Dean's personality although you were kind of disappointed not to find some AC/DC or Led Zeppelin posters on his walls. Sure he was no teenager anymore to have posters on his room but he surely acted like one and... who cared whether he should be a teen or not to have posters of his favorite bands on his room. You attributed it to the fact, though, that he did not spend much time at his place especially now that he was the CEO of the Enterprises and had to work lots of hours per day.
You were dressed in the clothes Dean had let for you on the bed, a simple t-shirt and a pair of faded blue jeans that fitted you perfectly. You frowned when you thought of where he might have gotten these but brushed it of anyway. You followed the smell of something being cooked, and the sound of humming, until you found your way to the kitchen. Dean's back was turned to you but you could not say you minded, not in the least bit. You could see his muscles flex under his light blue shirt, the sleeves were rolled up living nothing to the imagination as his exposed arms worked perfectly with the pan. He was humming some Metallica tune, tapping his foot and slightly shaking his waist.
This was a sight you could certainly get used to.
Sadly though Dean turned to put something on a plate and stopped his small show once he saw you.
"Uh how long have you been there?" he asked you, almost fearing to hear your answer.
You had a hard time stifling a giggle at the look on his face "Uh let's say long enough to know your little dirty secret" you said with a teasing smirk.
"You talk to anyone about this, I'm firing you" he said half-threateningly, half-seriously.
You shrugged a little bit "You've got some good moves, though" you said and saw him roll his eyes, although a smile was forming on his face.
"So what's on the menu?" you stood behind him and on your toes to look over his shoulder what he was cooking.
"Well I figured something quick, easy and yet tasty would be ideal so I have pasta with sauce made by yours truly" he said with a proud smile and winked at you.
"Sounds good to me" you shrugged slightly and took a seat on the kitchen table as Dean started putting the last bits of sauce on the pasta.
"I see they fit well" he said glancing at you "The clothes I mean" he added.
"Oh yeah, they're pretty comfortable. Where did you get them anyway?" you asked him.
"Uh well they belonged to a one-night-stand that was smart enough to bring a change of clothes with her" he said and then his eyes widened when he realized what he had just voiced.
"Oh" you only said, look hardening "So much for sleeping at their places then, huh?" you said bitterly.
Dean didn't say anything but just handed you your plate and sat in front of you with his own. He poured some wine for you and himself and the both of you started eating in silence. Dean cursed himself in his mind for making such a slip up. Of course that one-night-stand was a long time ago and it didn't matter to him but he was truly a fool for saying it out loud in front of you.
Especially when he was trying his best to win you over. He had made a deal with himself to prove to you that he was worth a chance, that you could trust him and form a relationship with him, that you wouldn't have to worry about him being faithful yet he seemed to be failing miserably.
"Sorry" he said before he could comprehend.
"What?" you asked in a low voice, looking at him.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to say that. Hell, I don't even know why I said it. That's been like eight months ago. And I was drunk. But- yeah, sorry" he mumbled and went back to playing with his food, a small pout was on his lips.
You stared at him for a quite while and smiled softly.
"Well that's what you get for drinking a lot. I've warned you before but as always you refuse to listen to me" you said and he had to look up at hearing the playful tone in your voice.
He saw the smirk on your face and immediately lightened up. He scoffed and playfully rolled his eyes at you "Says the woman that still has to finish a glass of wine" he pointed to your half full glass.
"Well excuse me but I like to go slow on things. Makes the pleasure last longer" you said and soon felt a blush creep up your cheeks upon realizing what had actually come out of your mouth and how Dean was probably going to interpreted it. And, considering the forming smirk and raised eyebrow, he had caught it that way.
You cleared your throat and went back to eating, Dean doing the same but not missing the chance to send you looks that certainly had you blushing. But you couldn't deny the fact that you enjoyed it, as well. Hell you enjoyed the whole dinner with Dean. You soon started talking about different topics that interested you both and you caught yourself having a good time. Something that was to be expected when it comes to Dean. You even moved to the living room to watch a few movies but didn't stop talking nonetheless. You laughed and shared lame jokes, recounted stories about yourselves and you could admit he had some really interesting ones to say as far as his childhood was concerned. You caught yourself forgetting that this was actually your boss and you should be more formal with him, even outside the job.
Time passed by quickly and before you could realize it it was dark outside. What matter was that Dean had once again made you forget all of the things that hurt you and you didn't want to remember. He had made you forget about what had happened earlier this day and how you had felt. He had made you forget about Christian and actually have a good time. And you could never be more thankful to him about that.
Silence had now surrounded you but it didn't feel uncomfortable at all. It felt as if you were at peace. A small smile was on your lips as you looked down at the almost empty glass of wine and Dean was doing the same. Your mind would not stop thinking though, even if you didn't want it to and for the first time in a long while you felt as if it was time to speak up.
"He wasn't just my boss" you blurted out and Dean looked up from his glass to you with a frown.
You took in a deep breath as you prepared to speak "Christian Grey. He wasn't just my boss"
"And-" the deep frown on Dean's face showed the confusion, worry and fear he truly felt. Fear of what he was about to hear.
"What was he, (Y/n)?" he asked cautiously.
"He-" you took in a deep breath and looked at Dean deep in his eyes. There was still a chance to back away. To take everything back and not tell him the truth. To make up some sort of lie. You didn't know how Dean was going to react to finding out the truth. You didn't know what he was going to do, say or think about you when he found out.
Kicking you out of his house, the Enterprises and his life seemed as the most possible option but when you saw that weird yet interesting flash of emotion in his eyes you knew that everything would probably be ok. That flash of emotion in Dean's eyes was something you had never seen before and surely something you couldn't exactly name but it made you feel warm inside and above all...
"He was my lover, Dean. Christian and I were lovers" you breathed out.