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My nine years on dA - thoughts and conclusions

Journal Entry: Mon Jun 2, 2014, 1:21 PM


Hello little ones. :heart:

If you still remember who I am, you probably noticed that my activity in recent years has dramatically decreased. Although being 'quite' alive on Tumblr and sometimes Facebook, I gradually withdrew (is that the right word?) myself from online communities due to lack of submissions and stuff to update in general. Real life struggles and tremendous amount of work took away both my time and will to sit focused during free evenings and create for myself. Doing freelance for living is satisfying, but in the long term becomes a killer for creativity, energy and social life. Especially when you're assigned to three big projects at the same time and suddenly you have no idea where the last five months have gone. O_O (happening to me atm)

But enough of that. Today I realised it'll soon be NINE years since I joined dA. Not only do I feel old (:wtf:), but somehow... proud? Well, I didn't accomplish a lot, especially considering my goals from that time (ya know, being extremely popular, likable, having lots of popular friends, etc - the regular teenage dreams xD), but being aware that I've been part of the biggest art community for almost a decade is... very pleasing. I sometimes like to look back at my beginnings and see how I and the site changed. And I somehow miss those times when everything was new and I was just at the start of my online artistic journey.
During that journey I discovered hundreds of amazing artists who gave me inspiration and motivation to improve. I was a gallery moderator, I organised contests, events, gave first Daily Deviations (when they were still a huge exposure) to people who later evolved into fantastic artists (with Charlie-Bowater or anikakinka among them, whose careers I was lucky to observe almost from the beginning), etc. I got five Daily Deviations myself and got chances to appear on the front page three times or so. I've also had wonderful watchers who've been there with me for most of the time, some for almost as many years as I, which is even more amazing.

Nowadays hardly anyone visits my page anymore, almost half of my watchers is inactive/left dA, I have no time to keep my profile updated and no new stuff to submit anyway, so no wonder I'm being forgotten. It doesn't bother me that much anymore, but remembering how obsessed I used to be with popularity makes me a little sad. xD And you know what? I wish I could start anew with a fresh account, ereasing my whole dA history from the web. To again have that feeling of a start and refreshed motivation. I know I can create a new account, but there's no point in reuploading my pictures somewhere else if they're already everywhere in internet under my current nickname. And I don't want to get rid of 'anako' either. So I'll just sitck to my old account, but for now... will clear it.

You can still find my pictures in my portfolio or tumblr. But I'll put my whole dA on hiatus until I'm ready and free to create for myself again. I'm planning to finish my current jobs until the start of July, so it's not that long from now. Either way... I still don't know if I bring the old deviations back. I'm kind of sick of looking at them when I'm not able to draw in my style and improve. Bleh.

Thank you for still being with me, sweeties. bee... wtf? by bojis

Have a little bonus from 2005:
Devscreen Pgviews3 by Anako-ART

OTHER PLACES WHERE YOU CAN FIND ME [link]~~


CSS by newklear edited by Anako-ART
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:iconjoshuaotero:
joshuaotero Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
I just got back to dA myself. Feeling that position with personal and professional life fluctuating back and forth is tough. We are all here for you still. You got this Anako-ART!
Reply
:icondoodah:
Doodah Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I'm feeling EXACTLY like you lol :hug:
Reply
:iconmcr72:
MCR72 Featured By Owner Jul 12, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Aww, but your art are so gooodd
Okay then :') I hope the best for you :hug:
Reply
:iconveni-scripsi-vici:
Veni-Scripsi-Vici Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
:iconaawplz:
Reply
:iconajinu-okami:
AJInu-Okami Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2014  Student Artist
I will miss you :(
Reply
:iconleradraco69:
LeraDraco69 Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I love you, Miss. Daria!!! I always hope to see new creations from you. You're so sweet and talented, and you've given me the greatest gift in the ENTIRE world!!!  I could never forget you. You'll forever be in my heart. And I plan on befriending you on FB now. <3
Reply
:iconbeholdentolove:
Beholdentolove Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:hug:
Reply
:iconphoneix-faerie:
Phoneix-Faerie Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
:hug: take care
Reply
:icondivby0:
divby0 Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014  Professional Writer
Just broke 10 myself, and I'm not just withdrawing (yes, that's the right word), I'm actually in the process of removing everything, storing it elsewhere, and then leaving for good.
Reply
:icondocmallard:
DocMallard Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
I will sure miss you.

-Doc
Reply
:iconbloodlustserenade:
BloodlustSerenade Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I'm only at 7 years myself but still...I can see where you are coming from.
In that seven years I have spent one or two at a time more or less ignoring DA and opting instead to turn my attention elsewhere.  It really shows since my improvement has not been very steady >_>

Hopefully, like me you will be back soon-ish!  My fingers are crossed that I will not have to wait too long before I can see some of your art again :)

It has been deviants like you who have had me coming back for more.
Your art makes me strive to improve.
I hope you come back but I'd understand if you didn't ... either way good luck!!
Reply
:icondalal-n:
Dalal-N Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Student Digital Artist
I just realized I'm also close to 9 years here (5 days away, to be exact). DANG. 

Wish you the best!
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Thanks a lot and grats to you too! :D
Reply
:iconoo-monkey-oo:
oO-Monkey-Oo Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Hobbyist
I'm still a baby on DA, less than 2 years old! 
 But I've forever been a fan of art. 
 And people like you who have been around for so long, contributing to the machine and making everything move in circles, you paved the road so that we could keep the community alive and keep it going in your absence!
 It's too bad you feel the need to remove your work. Some of it is like a staple to your progress, some of them like scars in your portfolio. But all of them make you and are a part of you :) 
 
I'm running a wee little group if you ever feel like coming back slowly and taking it easy I will be needing a moderator sooner or later ;) 

No matter where you go and what you do, everything still keeps moving. Time never stops. 
So hurry back to us :monkeymote: 
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Not long ago I didn't even think about removing my old work from dA, because of that visible "progress", but I guess I stared at it for enough time. I suppose it will do me more good if I try to forget about old pictures - at least for a moment - to have a fresh mind when I'm finally back to drawing. :)

I don't think my old days of sick activity will ever return though, now I prefer to focus on creating rather than management. :D

Thank you very much for your comment! :heart:
Reply
:iconoo-monkey-oo:
oO-Monkey-Oo Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014  Hobbyist
Perfect. Life is all about creating!
 :D
Reply
:iconmichaelogaz:
michaelogaz Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014
Looking forward to your return.  Good luck at everything else...
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Thanks a lot, comments like yours make me happy :heart:
Reply
:iconormille:
Ormille Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Student Filmographer
aw i'm with you! good luck on whatever's ahead dear!^^
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Thank you very much!! :glomp:
Reply
:iconnamae-san:
Namae-san Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
No to trzymaj się z tymi projektami :) Ależ ten to leci. Kiedy minęły te czasy, gdy dA było całe ciemniutkie o__O
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Nooo, stopniowo i powolutku wszystko rozjaśniają. ;p Ale fajnie byłoby wrócić do starej szaty graficznej.

Dzięki! :)
Reply
:iconstarbat:
Starbat Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I'm still here.  If you end up becoming more active again, I'll be watching.  ;)
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Aww thank you very much :hug: You've been there for a very long time with me and I'm extremely grateful for this. <3
Reply
:iconcontingencyiam:
Contingencyiam Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
I just wanted you to know that your work has touched more hearts than you realize. There are image sharing sites out there (like imgur), who have found your art and sing it's praises. There are people like myself, who find you inspiring and wonderful; and I will say without some of your tutorials, I would not have gotten to where I am now.

Art is a skill of constant change and improvement; and even when you feel like your back is against a wall (that evil one called art block, that tells you that you will never improve, or makes it hard for you to carry on) every experience, even a failed one, is still learning and growing. You may not have many active DA members watching you anymore... but perhaps I can speak for the few voices out there that are currently screaming into the vastness "We are thankful for you. We are still here. We will miss you."

Even when you are facing frustrations that we cannot completely understand, or that we go through ourselves in similar ways... Even when you feel like you've reached a stand still, or need to take some time away. Know this; There are people out there that are creeping towards their own goals, because of your help and inspiration. Please never doubt yourself to the point that you grow blind to your own worth. You are incredible, and you have my personal thanks for helping me grow as an artist; even if you never knew it. You will never be "forgotten".

Come back soon, Anako. It won't be the same without you.
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Oh my gosh, your comments made my day :heart: People don't tell this kind of things very often, so I'm feeling very touched and encouraged by your words! It's hard to have an idea of how myself and my works are perceived when for years I'm constantly jumping through breaks, art blocks or those very few moments of motivation and high self-esteem. It's heart-warming to know that I'm still liked and remembered. Thank you very much, I'll do my best not to disappoint you. :heart:
Reply
:iconcontingencyiam:
Contingencyiam Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
I am happy that I could make you feel encouraged. I struggle with my own art block occasionally, or get frustrated with my pace of improving. I am not sure if it will help you or not, but I have a pretty simple process to keep myself motivated. Whenever I feel I have hit a wall, or I look back on my old work and feel frustrated, I stop for a few minutes, and review.

I go back and I look at each piece I have created and I try to remember if only for a moment, how I felt while making it. My triumphs, my failures. I take them all in stride, and for a few minutes place myself back into the shoes of a past me. I understand looking at old work and feeling frustrated, or disgusted by it, even wanting to hide it away; but when I do this and I really pay attention, I can see how much I truly have improved.

I remember how it felt to make each one. If I felt scared, or inspired, or frustrated. Art is about more than technical skill and we are all our own worst critics. There are times I make something that I really like, and I wake up the next day and look at it, and all I can see are my mistakes. You have to learn to embrace your mistakes and your shortcomings. Accept them, and let them be a fuel source for you to improve. All the flaws you see, I promise most others will not.

It is always going to be hard knowing how others perceive you, or your work; but the worst thing you can do is be afraid of what they might think. Create for yourself, not for us. Be proud of yourself, no matter what. Look back and really remember how good it felt each time you learned something new, or made something you were proud of; and I hope you can find the same joy picking up a pencil and drawing, that you did that very first time. 

Good luck to you, and all the best,
Rae
Reply
:icondarkdragon247:
DarkDragon247 Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Congratz, best of luck to you and hope to see you back soon! ;)
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
thank you! :heart:
Reply
:iconmirz333:
mirz333 Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014   General Artist
Honestly, I don't think it's just your activity. As much as I love dA, I see it slowly dying. People don't comment much anymore. As you mention, a DD isn't the huge exposure it once was. There just isn't that community that there used to be. I know things change, and sites change, and I still love this site. But you can just see that it's not the same. There was always a commercial element, but there was still that family feeling. That's just gone. Because of that, the joy of posting here is not the same. A lot of people are dropping off and it's a shame.

Nevertheless, congratulations on 9 years. I haven't forgotten you. I wish you good luck in the future, be it here or wherever you end up. :hug:
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Thank you very much for kind words! :heart:

And yeah, you are absolutely right. dA has changed, but it's the whole internet community that have changed in past years. People no longer comment like they used to, they rather fav or 'like' stuff instead of writing even a few words that would make artists happier. And they just get tired of old mechanisms like deviantART. I would love to bring the old times back.
Reply
:iconollybird:
Ollybird Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I agree. People don't comment as much anymore. It makes me sad.
Reply
:iconcristii:
cristii Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Professional General Artist
Przede wszystkim gratuluję jakiego sukcesu! ( 9 lat tutaj to dużo) chociaż jak patrzę na Twój screen to mi się łezka w oku kręci (OMG! tak to faktycznie kiedyś wyglądało xD)
Nie mniej powodzenia z projektami i mam nadzieję iż kiedyś jeszcze do nas wrócisz, chociaż sława i ciekawa przyszłość artystyczna stoi przed Tobą otwartymi drzwiami, zarówno na dA jak i wszędzie :clap: :)
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:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Dzięki wielkie :) Wrócę pewnie niebawem, bo czym jest miesiąc/półtora w porównaniu z prawie rokiem braku mojej większej aktywności ;p

I noo, tęsknię za starym dA - trochę z sentymentu, a trochę jednak z faktu, że wszystko było wtedy jakoś mniej chaotyczne i łatwiej było o uwagę. Aw well.
Reply
:iconcristii:
cristii Featured By Owner Jun 9, 2014  Professional General Artist
No tak! ale po tym oczekiwaniu jak już coś wrzucasz to nagle wszyscy się cieszą jak małe dzieci i jest takie "Wowwwwww!! Wrzuciła coś!" :la: :la: :D

Była przejrzyste, teraz stawiamy bardziej na biznes, chociaż ja totalnie nie ogarniam chociażby 'Print Options' czy też nie udzielam się na forum. Za dużo roboty mam już z grupą! :)
Reply
:iconhydropalika:
Hydropalika Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
I wish you the best of luck :hug: Iīm sure everything will turn out like you hope it will ;) Till then I will keep following you on tumblr or here :D
And donīt worry, we will never forget you ;)
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Thank you very much!! it's very comforting to hear this :)
Reply
:iconsheledriia:
Sheledriia Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
<3
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
:heart: !
Reply
:iconaneriana:
Aneriana Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Szczerze powiedziawszy... dopiero niedawno Cię odkryłam i zamierzałam odwiedzać profil. A tu zdecydowałaś zniknąć. :) Czy pochłaniają Cię projekty zlecone jako freelancerowi czy pracujesz w jakimś studio/agencji etc.? :)
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Oh, nie zamierzam nigdzie znikać :D Szczerze powiedziawszy, to pewnie wrócę na dA prędzej, niż trwała moja dotychczasowa przerwa. xD I szybko (mam nadzieję!) uzupełnię galerię nowymi obrazkami. :)

Czas pochłaniają mi freelancerskie projekty - od kilku lat prowadzę firmę i rysuję na zlecenie. I mam już powoli tego dosyć, bo przy trzech dżobach jednocześnie dzieje się to, o czym napisałam w journalu, i już po prostu nie wyrabiam. :P A kiedy mam przerwę od pracy, to z kolei zamiast się relaksować panikuję, że nikt się do mnie nie zgłasza. Nie da się dogodzić. ;p
Reply
:iconaneriana:
Aneriana Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Cieszy mnie, że jest szansa, że chęć powrotu na dA Cię zdominuje i będę mogła wrócić do obserwowania Twojej zacnej galerii. :D Nie wiem jakim cudem przez moje 7 lat na dA (5+2 na innym koncie) tak skutecznie udało mi się nie wpaść na Twoje świetne prace. -_-
Reply
:iconaneriana:
Aneriana Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Ojej prowadzisz firmę? Własną? :) Wybacz, że tak dociekam, ale lubię się dowiadywać od znanych mi grafików czy udało im się pracować w branży związanej z malowaniem i grafiką komputerową. U nas w Polsce wydaje się to niezbyt proste, szczególnie freelancersko. Masz sporo zleceń z zagranicy?
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Tak pół na pół. Różnie z tym bywa. W 2012 roku np miałam tylko zagranicznych klientów, a w kolejnym głównie polskich. Zależy od zlecenia - wbrew pozorom za granicą wcale nie płacą jakoś kosmicznie więcej niż u nas, oczywiście jeśli mówimy o normalnych firmach (a nie poszukiwaczach jeleni ;) ). Często odzywają się do mnie po paru latach (!) od wysłania portfolio.
Ogólnie jakoś idzie, raz bywa lepiej, raz trochę gorzej, ale już powoli kręćka dostaję od monotonii i się zastanawiam czy jednak nie poszukać jakiegoś etatu z normalnym wymiarem godzin i wolnymi weekendami. xd Pytanie czy znajdę takowy, bo wielu ofert nie ma, a tam, gdzie bym chciała, miejsca zajęte są już przez wymiataczy. :D
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:iconnicarox:
NicaRox Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014
I definitely haven't forgotten! I'm in a similar situation haha, but I wish you the best of luck!
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014
Aww thank you :hug: And to you too! It's never cool not having enough time to do fun stuff :(
Reply
:iconkrista-dunaway:
Krista-Dunaway Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I wish you the best of luck and can't wait to see your return! Until then, I'll be following you on Tumblr!
Reply
:iconanako-art:
Anako-ART Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014
Thank you very much, that's very cheering up! :heart:
Reply
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