Published: April 17, 2018
"My worst fear is being alone,
Terribly frightened when there's no one else home.
This is the time when my demons come out,
Inside my head they scream and they shout.
Overwhelming feelings, chaos and destruction.
I believe this is what they call an overproduction,
Of cortisol and hormones flooding my brain,
Absolutely panicking, feeling so insane.
As I'm shaking,
My whole world is quaking.
My heart races so fast.
Oh, please, let this pass.
I don't want to feel this way.
I want to get back to being okay.
So I write and I rhyme.
The same things over with different lines.
I feel bad, honestly,
To have these problems chronically.
Downward spiral, makes me feel worse.
This is my burden and my curse.
Separation anxiety is very real to me.
I wish it didn't affect me so greatly.
In my life, it causes so many problems,
How I wish I could just get to the bottom,
Of figuring out how to conquer it.
But I don't give up and I won't quit,
Trying to figure myself out,
And how to do it better the next bout.
Just one thing, before I go,
That when I'm honest and let my feelings show,
It always helps me to feel better.
Each and every word and letter.
My heart has slowed back down,
I just may have come back around.
Back to happy Alisa again,
Where the sun shines, and the rainbow never ends."