Mature Content
This content is intended for mature audiences
Log in to confirm your age
airagorncharda's avatar

The Clippy of Gay Sex

169 Favourites
333 Comments
5K Views
The title was suggested by Lex, my boyfriend. In case you don't get it, it references "Clippy" from Microsoft Word. He's pops up and gives unsolicited advice about how to write. Well I'm popping up and giving unsolicited advice about how to write gay sex.

He also suggested "How to write gay sex for gay guys like a gay guy."

The "season" I'm referring to is the spring season. Because I started this in the spring. Also it refers to the Sex Ed. episode of Glee, which I started this shortly after. I considered removing that part now that it's waaay past the season, but meh. It's always the season for sex--I mean, to educate yourself.


Enjoy. I feel, for some reason, like I'm going to get heat for this.



Also, just a note here. I too was once an ignorant thirteen year old who read 18+ fanfic online. And I thought a lot of things were true that are simply not true. I'm not judging anybody.

[EDIT: If I made this comic now, it would not look like this. There are some parts of this that I articulated poorly, in offensive ways. I didn't really understand as much as I do now about gender, biology, ableism, or cisnormativity at the time I wrote/drew this. I do now. I still agree with my overall points, but not how I worded some of them (pretty much anything that comes across as judgmental, condescending, or disdainful). I cringe as some of these drawings, and at how I wrote some of this to seem more mature than I was at the time while still not being able to talk directly about anuses or poop (clearly I wasn't that mature). There's some bad stuff in here, and I'm sorry. I feel that taking it down would be trying to hide the fact that I used to be ignorant on a lot of issues, so I'm leaving it up. I did this, and parts of it aren't great. I own up to that.]
IMAGE DETAILS
Image size
616x9985px 2.02 MB
Published:   |  Mature
© 2011 - 2021 airagorncharda
Comments333
anonymous's avatar
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
LeSnoid's avatar
Some men do produce a sweet pre ejaculate. The viscosity and whether it's salty, sweet or flavorless has to do with diet. Everything else is spot on. Thanks for educating the masses...

smithca1988's avatar
I have actually read  that some stories by gay/bisexual people that refer in there stories to the penis as a shaft, rod, etc. If I wrote one as Bisexual male I would do the same. I have used my vibrator on my but and when I found the male G-spot the prostate I did arch my back a bit and bit my lip. I wear woman's Bikini panties 100% cotton and if you sized right you can wear them comfortably, so most women's bikini type no matter the fabric males could wear comfortably along with the boy short panties I imagine. I do hate the no condom thing in gay sex stories. One guy reddirtwriter.tumblr.com/  www.literotica.com/stories/mem… seems to make safe sex flow right into the story. 
LoverLove78's avatar
But its fan fiction it not suppose to be taken seriously so whats it matter if there are a lot of misconceptions as long as people know its make believe xD
Pagescrawler95's avatar
If it hurts, use some lotion. It acts as a lube during the act, and a painkiller afterwards. XD
Ghostshrike1's avatar
This is a wonderful piece; informative, sarcastic. I absolutely love it.
ChronicScabPicker's avatar
This is so great. I'll admit, when I was a wee teeny bopper and first discovered R rated fanfics, yaoi smut was mind blowing. But then I grew up, got fed up with the cliches like the ones you discussed (about the various alternate ways to call a character THANK. YOU. This drives me NUTS) and started doing actual research on sex tips posted by actual gay men who had actual anal sex and was like 'wow, I knew fanfics were fantasized, but some of this stuff was just physically IMPOSSIBLE!'. I'm actually currently working on an original story in which the two main characters are in a relationship and I plain to have some... well, explicit scenes, so this post was really helpful to me. Because I'm going to be tackling themes like homophobia within the story, and want to portray the relationship as realistically as possible, these kinds of details are really useful to know.
Just for the record though, talking from experience, a clitoris can also be very sensitive to the point of painful post and pre orgasm. ;P
Modest-Elitist's avatar
Being too sensitive after orgasm depends on the guy, I speak from experience. And it's the same with the clitoris, (Though I'm sure you don't care :P) they're actually more similar than you think. It's just not in the place you're usually fucking.

Sex should never hurt you, unless you want it to. :)
Link-DontBlink's avatar
You basically came down hard (pun intended) on most fanfics I've read and some of them were really well written. But I think even though you wouldn't actually refer to a dick as a "throbbing hard member" it provides more variety than dick, cock, and penis. Like, he undid his pants and pulled out his rock-hard penis just sounds weird. He undid his oants and pulled out his rock-hard dick sounds the best, but some originality is fine. Like, he seductively undid his pants (is that possible?) and slowly pulled out his achingly hard member sounds more fun than he whipped out his penis and bam there it was. Just a thought. Other than that, this is really good advice which I'll have to take into account the next time I write 1/4 of a fanfiction and then forget about it.
genkae's avatar
psssssst.....I actually knew a nine-year-old who read smutty slash and het x readers/fanfics ............q-q America o' America
I-Am-Eddie-J's avatar
I completely have to agree with you, even though I myself can be guilty of writing such fantasies, that are none too realistic.  But, sometimes it's hard to maintain a sense of realism when fantasy gets involved.

I thought this was an entertaining read though, and I will definitely have to attempt to write a fic with more realistic actions and wording, maybe as a challenge to myself to veer away from fantasy and stick to the realities of what gay sex involves and not what is stereotypically believed.
JustHereToLook6's avatar
man you called it didn't you ive read some pretty fake manXman fanfics and they sucked compleatly unrealistic
AniObi's avatar
I've written some gay sex scenes that have not been viewed, good to know that I wrote them realistically. There is one thing that does tick me off more then any of these. But it's more to do with the consent not happening. It's the writers who deal with one of the (usually older) guy raping the other and the guy being rape suddenly changes from 'scared, hate, tense, trying to fight' to 'love love love'. Incidentally, right after the rapist finds their prostate.  Oh, and it seems the victim is never ever emotionally scarred. I've read one, one out of a hundreds of fics, that deals with this realistically. That author only wrote it because of how many fics are writing rape like it's romantic and perfectly fine if they both initially love each other.

The excuses are seemingly always 'but they love each other, so it's not rape!'.... I'm not even talking about role playing rape where it is consented beforehand, because that's not rape. What is rape is: the character is literally making the other have sex without their consent. The writers are just sending off a horrible message that it's okay to have sex with a person that loves you, even if they didn't give you consent. Because it's not rape if they love you.  

No. Just no. If one person is not consenting, it is rape. It doesn't matter if they are going out or love each other or even FWB, it is still rape. I find those fics more with same-sex (typically males) then any other. That just erks me more then others especially when they get so many comments/reviews saying how awesome it was and how 'romantic'. It is incredibly sad and horrible at how many comments on those stories use the word 'romantic'. Urgh! *frustrated screams*. 
airagorncharda's avatar
Oh my god I agree 9,000% with this. I didn't add it to this list, because it didn't feel like the same kind of issue to me. I was mostly addressing logistical stuff. But you're completely right and it also drives me nuts. I cannot express enough how right you are.
Yujirushimasen's avatar
well sometimes (i agree with everything you wrote but) just sometimes,
if it fits perfectly to the character of the persons of the pairing,
the a bit forcibly achieved sexual action is realistic and hot :P
(i refer to some GrimmIchi now :3)
AniObi's avatar
When I saw your list, I had just given up on finding better stories. Honestly, soo many of them. The list went in the logic of the 'basic acts' more then plot. 
D-teen91's avatar

Ok I love you for this, I agree with you on the condom thing, heck even if your both safe you should wear them, first off safer second off tops you last longer! Less clean up for the bottom, plus as a guy who is afraid to Solow cum, flavored ones are life savors!

 

I also plan to look back at this should I ever write a sex scene!  

Negracamada's avatar
This should be posted on every fan fiction site.
airagorncharda's avatar
Syniia's avatar
I have to say, i died laughing reading this, it was freaking great!!! BUT! i will say this, Naruto, is human, he does posses a demon in his body but the demon is only chakra, he can only influence that, it's evil chakra so that's one reason naruto wouldn't go into a heat. AND! part of the reason for people saying "it's so hot~" could be because the sensation of going through an orgasm can cause them to feel cloud nine and intensify EVERYTHING so saying "It's so hot~" may only be from the euphoria. sorry for any spelling errors. but yea, i loved the comic! i really did.
airagorncharda's avatar
I agree that orgasm can feel hot, but I've definitely seen/read fics where the semen itself is described as hot. And yeah, there are a lot of reasons why Naruto wouldn't go into heat, but unfortunately there are a lot of fics in which he does. /headdesk. XD

I'm glad you enjoyed!
Syniia's avatar
Haha im glad you wrote it! it was adorable! and most of what you wrote was very accurate. I like it.
CaoimheMorana's avatar
This is awesome! Although I have yet to read a yaoi fic where the author thought men have hymens/that it always hurt just the first time. I have read several that write it out to be like anal sex is horrifically painful until "that magic spot" gets hit...I never understood that. I agree the only time it's painful is if you are doing something wrong. As for you wanting writers to use the characters' names. I prefer mixing it up. If you just use the names, it gets a bit redundant. Otherwise, I pretty much agree with you on this.
airagorncharda's avatar
The hymen thing isn't literally about writers saying that men have hymens; it's about the conversation that I've seen a ridiculous number of times where two guys are about to have sex for the first time and one of them says something like "It always hurts the first time" and the concept is that the guy buttoming has to deal with pain for a couple minutes, and then it'll all be fine after that. Which is ridiculous, and not how it works. /shrug. I'm not even sure where that concept came from.

And god, yes, the "this is the worst pain in my life-- oh wait you found my prostate, not I'm in heaven" thing. /headdesk.

Thank you for your comment!!
anonymous's avatar
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In