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About Deviant Artist AyameFemale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 11 Years
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Between You and Me
There are so many things in my life that I regret,
like that time that I accidentally made that boy cry,
or when I lied to my favorite teacher
and she told me that she was really disappointed in me.
But there are also things in this life that I will never regret,
like being with you and loving you,
and there are no words poetic enough to describe
how sorry I am for having made you think
that I could ever regret all these beautiful memories that you've given me.
You've been my dream catcher for over a year now,
protecting me from nightmares and holding me tightly
whenever I was scared or when I just couldn't stop crying,
and for all the times that I've felt hurt by you,
nothing tore me apart like knowing that I had hurt you so badly.
It's amazing what we're capable of when we're upset
and how we can so easily forget the things we've said and done once we're better
and leave them carelessly for others to find.
It's amazing the way that we can break each other so easily.
But what's even m
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 7 8
+ Heartbreak +
i've lost my faith.
once upon a time, i was a believer.
i believed in magic, real magic,
the kind you see only in your dreams,
and i believed in love, real love
[[ the kind you only see in the movies, i've learned ]]
i gave everything i had and still tried to give more,
until i was too exhausted and there was nothing left to give.
the fire deep inside me finally blew out.
i tried burning everything i had to keep it going,
but it still wasn't enough (for you).
i've lost my faith in you.
once upon a time, you were the tape and the glue
piecing my broken heart back together,
fearlessly reaching for the jagged pieces.
i used to wake up from nightmares in your arms,
and you would take my fears from me, one by one,
and kiss lullabies on my lips until i felt safe again.
you would hold me against you
and i'd press my face to your chest,
listening to your heart sing me the sweetest hymnes
as you caried me to heaven
and rocked me to sleep in your wings.
your voice was
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 10 3
Wisdom of a Dying Old Woman
   My day has come and gone.
Once upon a time, I was you --
smooth, soft skin of the fairest variety,
long, slender legs,
sparkling auburn curls cascading down my back
like the fountain from which I would give anything to drink.
Frivolous spending, short skirts and flirty eyes,
they handed life to me on a silver platter,
and I drank the envy of my peers from a golden goblet.
Now I can scarcely look in the mirror
for the monster I have become.
Taut, wrinkled skin and eyes that barely open,
fingers that cannot move
and a body that always aches,
I am my worst nightmare.
I'm no longer slender but rather skin and bones,
covered in warts and spotting with age,
hideous, a dying old crone with no one but herself to blame
for the way that she abused herself
and the world she toyed with in her foolish youthful years,
that has abandoned her now to her fate.
      My day has come and gone.
So, beautiful girl with eyes that burn passionately
for the tigh
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 10 4
the actress
it stings,
the cold smile she wears
just to keep you out. and it's rancid
like the darkness permeating her rotting core.
the shadow, slung over her shoulder
like a thick black cloak
that rather than protecting her
from the biting cold creates it,
is immense, looming and indestructible.
and it aches,
somewhere deep inside her,
the desire she can neither hide nor deny
to be the one,
something special that no one can resist,
to see her name up in lights,
snatch the leading role,
but instead she's the lead of her own dead-end soap opera,
not even her friends will watch,
and the script is full of lies,
pages of sales pitches.
implants and extensions,
she keeps her eyes on the prize,
but the pages are blank,
novels full of empty lines,
heavy with secrets of the most delicate sort,
like the dark place she hides when she just can't breathe
or where she buried her heart,
or how she cries herself to sleep.
and every night before bed, she's sure to say her prayers,
"take me far away from here, le
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 11 10
I am of strong principles.
I know right from wrong,

I was born and raised in paradise.
The sky is as much my home as it is my right.
It is as much my haven as it is Heaven,
a place not for everyone.
Only those who understand the difference between what is right
and what is heresy may pass through our lands.
Only those who bear no black mark upon the arm may pass.
It is not segregation. They live in their own paradise,
a fiery place to which we dare not journey,
a horrible place where the terrible lie freely with whomever they please,
a tragic place where storybooks speak to the merits of rape and savagery,
of the destruction of this sacred place in which we are spared
from the brutality of the world beneath,
where we need not look at it,
where we need not think of it.
I am of strong principle.
I know right from wrong.

I was taught to understand you,
to understand the dark place in which you were born and raised.
It seemed unfair at first, that children were born into suc
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 11 14
Fated - ...Our Destiny Part2-
    [[Do you believe in fate--
          that one simple, momentary encounter
          will change everything that happens after
          for the rest of our lives?]]

Once upon a time,
the wind stroked my cheeks and told me
that this wasn't an illusion at all.
I believed for a time after that fate would lead me to you,
if I just closed my eyes and dreamed of your smiling face.
The longer I dreamed to see you, the farther away you felt,
so I agonized for months that turned to years,
and I told myself that the stronger I wished to be,
the weaker I would become in inverse proportion,
and simply gave up.
(Do you believe in fate--
   that if we close our eyes and spin in circles,
   our fingers extended in random directions,
   the paths our blindfolded h
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 3 10
neither bliss nor foreboding,
just complete and utter blankness.
slowly, as though a gentle hand to guide me,
the faintest shiver awakens me.
falling faster, eyes open to the horrors of blackness,
of the stained soul that plummets into the flames beneath.
twisting, distorted,
senses return.
faint whispers as the tremors grow,
and the taste and smell of iron and bile rising.
wasted. rejected.
heart of granite crushed on stone.
whispers grow.
breath on the nape of the neck, traveling slowly.
hands close around, tightening,
tugging and dragging.
ice cold against warm flesh.
inaudible, over and over,
"please, no."
        (never sleep, never die,
         never, ever shut your eyes.
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 11 20
That Was Our Destiny
    (Do you believe in fate--
          that one simple, momentary encounter
          will change everything that happens after
          for the rest of our lives?)

fate is a river,
we float helplessly wherever it will carry us,
and the current grows stronger
as our resolve grows weaker
if we place our trust in the universe around us,
if we step back and close our eyes
and take deep breaths
fate will bring us together,
or tear us apart.
my life is left in the hands of destiny now.
(Do you believe in fate--
   that one enchanted look into each others eyes
   from across the train station or across the universe
   could lead us together for a lifetime
   of happiness and joy?)

fate is a river,
we float helplessly wherever it will carry us
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 24 20
Ignorance Must Be Bliss
I am lost in the ocean,
swept beneath waves that crash violently on every side
as salt water fills my eyes and lungs.
My body thrashes and trembles,
and my hands reach desperately towards nothing.
I am thrown roughly against the pier,
and suddenly consciousness is lost.
The threads of fantasy take root,
sweeping me away from all the pain and terror I feel.
but really, that's just another chance to drown.
My mother always told me,
'mind over matter, and your pain will disappear'
but I was never quite that strong.

I wish to be the ocean,
to be the majestic power in the distance
that you watch intently from the pier.
I wish for once to see the look of amazement on your face,
to be the object of your fantasy and desire.
My waves would reach the shore and snatch you away,
pulling you beneath my current.
I want to be on top for once, though not a looming presence.
I don't want you to feel the terror and anxiety that I have felt.
I don't want fleeting, guilty glances and stuttered wor
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 20 34
How to Learn a Language
Have you tried learning a language on your own? It's pretty difficult, which sends most people running. However, learning a language can be really rewarding. Most people where I'm from dream of visiting Italy, Spain, and various other parts of Europe, and it's much safer and more enjoyable to travel if you can speak even a little of the native language. Similarly, most natives prefer tourists who can at least somewhat understand them. Sadly, even with compelling reasons, learning a language on your own can seem impossible, but you don't have to worry. There's only three things you need to learn a language: interest, determination, and the right source.
STEP ONE: Choose your source.
How do you learn best? Do you remember pictures? Can you remember your teachers almost word for word after lectures? Do you prefer to read about something and take notes? There are hundreds of different language learning sources and not a single one of them is the “wrong way to learn.” If y
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 104 70
+ even with a god's power +
last night i lifted my arms above my head
and willed the brightest star in the sky to wink and flash.
i closed my fist and took a sharp breath as i felt the star cry out,
and suddenly in a brilliant explosion of chaos,
it was extinguished.
( What did it feel like to hold my heart in your hands?
                  Did you stare at it for hours wondering,
          or did you decide straight away with a maniacal smile
                       that this beautiful piece of crystal between your fingers
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 17 44
Sunlight trickles in,
prying her eyelids open.
"It's morning, Lilly."
"Wake up, you worthless child,"
cries the sun.
"Wake up, Sweetie,"
her mother utters softly.
"Wake up and see
how beautiful the world is."
Once upon a time, perhaps,
but not anymore.
Once upon a time,
a lot of things.
Like once upon a time,
she had a warm bed,
and her mother
came in every morning
to tell her
it was time,
time to open up
her lovely chocolate eyes
and show the world
her brightest smile.
"Look, Lilly,"
she would say
as she pulled the curtains
gently aside.
"Look at the sun;
isn't she gorgeous?"
"Yes, Mommy,"
she'd whisper, grinning,
"It's morning, Lilly. And every morning, the world is yours. Never forget that."
"I promise, Mommy. I promise."
Once upon a time, perhaps,
but not anymore.
Once upon a Tuesday,
when the sun was highest in the sky,
her mother came home,
and fell
in the doorway,
"Don't worry,
Mommy's just sick."
you said
we don't get sick
in the summer
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 39 47
to replicate the fire you ignited in my chest,
or to fill the emptiness left in its wake
equally impossible.
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 29 29
Countdown to Sunrise
Life is but an empty dream
   for the soul is dead that slumbers
            haunted by dream eaters
                       Life is but an empty glass
                           for no elixir saves a dreamer
                               or a life that fades at first light
                     Life is but a lonely path
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 25 41
Some Wishes Don't Come True
you take my heart in your hands
and burn it to ashes, painting crimson across my cheeks
and igniting my gold rimmed irises
every time your lips curve upwards.
my heart hammers against the walls of my chest
so painfully every time I see you.
my tears are locked up inside, and I'd never let you see me cry,
but at the same time I wish...
I wish that one day, you'll find me crying
and wrap your arms around me,
whispering that it's all right,
and bring your lips to mine
to gently remind me that I'm not alone.
Then you'll whisper three words I've always wished
you were just keeping locked up inside your chest.
I want you to wipe the tear stains from my cheeks,
and leave trails like fire across my lips,
all the while mumbling that there's no reason to cry
because you promise you'll always, always be mine.
but I know you won't,
because no matter what my subconscious would like to think,
and no matter how many cruel dreams rise to appease this aching heart,
in silent agony as I stare at the mid
:icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 32 57
Afraid of the Dark--Close Up by 3v3rdr34m3r Afraid of the Dark--Close Up :icon3v3rdr34m3r:3v3rdr34m3r 11 13


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United States
Favourite genre of music: Rock/Pop Rock/Alternative Rock/ Whatever genre my fav bands are.
Personal Quote: "FACES" xD
Hi, everyone. Sorry that I came back for a short while then left again. I've been having a somewhat rough time lately and I've been busier than ever.

I've been trying to post a new poem, but when I try to change the format (like indenting lines and leaving large spaces like I used to do), DA prevents me from doing so. It shows up as all aligned to the left and won't let me put in any spacing. Does anyone know how to fix this?

Hope everyone's doing well,


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lobishop Featured By Owner May 15, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
One thing to say... you're user name is awesome!!!!!!!!
3v3rdr34m3r Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2011
Thanks! :)
Rev2bn2014 Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2011
thanks for adding my photo to your collection
3v3rdr34m3r Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2011
You're welcome. :)
BetoGDL1 Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2011
Thank you! :+fav: Your support is very appreciated!!! :D:D
3v3rdr34m3r Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2011
You're welcome. :)
Lazy-Flutist Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2011
Thank you for the favorite on "Imperfection"! I am so thankful! :bow:
3v3rdr34m3r Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2011
You're welcome. :)
Jezamin Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you very much for the :+favlove:!
3v3rdr34m3r Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2011
You're welcome! :)
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