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My arms shake and I Can't breathe properly. "Even a child can stand this, what a baby." They're not in my mind, they don't understand why I fear needles. I grab my own hand I grip it tight and my mind crumbles. "It's not time for fight or flight. Now you must freeze." But my legs now, They're running. And my mouth now, It's screaming. The doctor tells me to be calm, I tell him I'm trying. Finally I'm just sitting, Biting my own hand. Closing my eyes so hard, Harder when I feel the metal cold Needle. I didn't even get a lollipop.