Lincoln: (groans) Man, I'm bored.
(Lisa walks downstairs)
Lisa: If that's the case, why don't you play your video games?
Lincoln: Beaten all of them so far. 100%. Still waiting for the next ones.
Lisa: Reading your comics?
Lincoln: Read all of them to this point. Still waiting for the next one.
Lisa: What about playing with your yo-yo?
(Lincoln, with a shocked impression, imagines Lori and Clyde in a wedding hall with wedding bells and wedding music played by a church organ, with Lori wearing a wedding gown and Clyde wearing a tuxedo. The two were about to kiss, until Lincoln pops the thought bubble with his index finger.)
Lincoln: Out of the question. (Smiles cheesily)
Lisa: Well, you gotta think of something.
(Lisa then walks back upstairs.)
Lincoln: (sighs) Best I could do is watch some TV.
(Lincoln picks up the remote and turns on the TV, then a commercial plays, catching Lincoln's interest.)
TV Announcer: Are
I know upon receiving this letter your first reaction will be to disregard it as some kind of joke. I assure you, however, the return address you see scrawled on the back of this envelope is very real, and so am I for quite some time, actually, despite what your history books may say.
But I digress; my existence is hardly the matter I wish to discuss with you. Does the name "Twilight" ring a bell? I should hope so. For that is the topic of the following letter.
I must admit, when I first heard about this series, I felt only a mild twinge of irritation: Just another vampire romance novel, I thought-full of inaccuracies and dark, brooding anti-heroes. While I could go on and on with my quibbles about any sort of romance with a vampire, your "Twilight" particularly caught my attention.
I'll be frank with you, Mrs. Meyer: it was the most inaccurate interpretation of vampi