1. Insist on calling Bill and Tom Thing 1 and Thing 2.
2. Read Green Eggs and Ham out loud late at night.
3. When they come back to their home town after a concert yell Yea, youre back! and hug them like youll never let go. After about five minutes constantly glance at the clock and say Shouldnt you be going somewhere?
4. Sell all four of them on eBay.
5. Tattoo your name on each of their foreheads in the middle of the night in permanent marker.
6. Dress up as a chicken and sing their songs loudly and off-key.
7. Constantly remind them that the female of the species is more deadly than the male.
8. Let a very large, non-poisonous, spider loose in the recording studio.
9. Record their loud, girly screams.
10. Poke Tom in the side non-stop, making him squeak. (This will not only annoy Tom, but his high-pitched squeaking will annoy the others too!)
11. Watch The Others a
1. Call him a perv in any way, shape, or form in every sentence you say.
2. Ask if hes Jamaican.
3. Whenever an advertisement for any feminine product comes on the TV, turn the volume all the way up and stare at him with wide, fascinated eyes.
4. Loudly tell anyone who happens to walk by that Kelly Clarkson is his personal hero.
5. Smack him upside the head every time he tries to flirt with someone and say Bad Tom! Bad!
6. Give away his every location to his fans.
7. Snip off a lock of his hair, set it on the floor, light candles all around it, and dance around the whole mess in some sort of cannibalistic ritual.
8. Steal all his hats and mail them to Peru.
9. In the middle of a concert run up to him and yell: How can you perform when were destroying the Ozone layer?
10. When hes watching TV place a spinney office chair in his direct line of vision and start spinning around like a mad person yelling Im n
1. Accidentally call him a girl in public.
2. Laugh hysterically every time he speaks the word what.
3. Steal all his eyeliner and begin drawing strange pictures all over his walls. When he asks what you are doing turn your back to him and mutter something about Georg doing you wrong.
4. Sing very loudly and very off-key to any Green Day song he might be playing.
5. At 4:27 in the morning, jump on his bed and scream The leprechauns are attacking! The leprechauns are attacking! Run for your life!
6. Rename him Phillip Johnny Bob and refuse to call him by any other name.
7. Give away the ending to any movie he may be watching.
8. Every time he beats you at a video game smack him with a pillow and accuse him of cheating.
9. Make fun of his dancing.
10. Tell him he looks like Michael Jackson.
11. Let a rabid monkey loose in his room while hes asleep.
12. Tell him his voice reminds you of a dying constipated cow.