10. Sing Discovery Channel by the Bloodhound Gang in your head whenever he is near.
9. Hotwire his Volvo and take it on a joyride.
8. Tell him the relationship he is having with Bella is practically paedophilia and he could be sent to jail for it.
7. Ask how Tanya is.
6. End every argument with Bite me, Edward.
5. Call him Romeo both behind his back and to his face.
4. Whenever he complains or argues, reply with What are you gonna do Edward? Go to Italy?
3. Tell him his hair isnt bronze, its ginger, and he should stop denying himself hes a ranga.
2. Whenever he leaves a room or says goodbye, get down on your knees and beg him not to go, not again.
And the Number One way to annoy Edward Cullen?
1. Take his silver cell phone and change the ringtone to Like a Virgin by Madonna.
10. Beg him not to eat you.
9. Inform him that he seems to be the depressed Cullen.
8. Go up to him, look him in the eye and ask if he is hungry.
7. Spell his name with two as (Jaspar) and call him Jaspar Cullen. When he objects, saying his name is Jasper Hale, wave your hand at him and tell him all that blood must have gone to his brain.
6. Tell him only girls feel emotions. Then giggle and run away.
5. Dress up in a cape and fangs and leap out in front of him when he is least expecting it, proclaiming you have come to suck his blood.
4. Send out waves of lust and see how he reacts.
3. When he gets too close made your fingers into the sign of the cross and cry, The power of Christ compels you!.
2. Splatter red paint all over his and Alices room and videotape his reaction.
And the Number One way to annoy Jasper Hale?
10. Never use English around him instead, bark.
9. Call him a space heater.
8. Tell him that dogs make good pets, not good partners.
7. Ask him if he has RSVPed to the wedding yet.
6. Inform him that real men sparkle.
5. Walk up to him and claim you have imprinted. Say you love him and demand his paw in marriage.
4. Tell him that even though he may run at a boiling 108.9 degrees, Bella doesnt find him hot.
3. Inquire as to how Leah is and if he dreams about Sam the way Leah dreams about Bella.
2. Ask him if he likes to do things doggy style.
And the Number One way to annoy Jacob Black?
1. Make him a day-by-day flip calendar, counting down the amount of time Bella will remain human.
10. Tell her that, because everyone thinks she and Jasper are twins, they should get together. When she asks why, say that Incest is in at the moment.
9. Call her Ice Queen behind her back and to her face.
8. Whenever she argues anything, respond with Whatever, bimbo.
7. Claim that being a human aint so great.
6. When she argues the above claim, respond with Whatever, bimbo.
5. Try to exorcise her and her evil ways.
4. Tell everyone that Edward didnt go to Italy because Rosalie said Bella was dead he went to Italy because he envisioned Rosalies ugly face.
3. Call her Hoe-salie at least once, to her face.
2. Remind her that Edward chose a pathetic human girl over her.
And the Number One way to annoy Rosalie Hale?
1. Steal her silver cell phone and change the ringtone to Roxanne by The Polic
10. Tell him only to address you in a cute English accent.
9. Call him Carlisle, but be sure to pronounce the s. When he corrects you, give him a weird look and tell him the q is silent.
8. Ask if blondes really do have more fun.
7. Inquire as to what he actually does on his night shift on the hospital, with all the pretty nurses in the ER.
6. Instead of telling him to get lost in an argument, tell him to swim to France.
5. When he annoys you, respond with times have changed, old man.
4. Ask what type of superhuman power compassion is what does he do in a fight? Love thy enemy to death?
3. Leap out from behind the desk in his study when he isnt expecting it and spray him with Holy Water.
2. Call him McSteamy or McDreamy.
And the Number One way to annoy Carlisle Cullen?
1. Run around the Emergency Room screamin