Call and I Shall Answer by Neshi-Farfarer, literature
Literature
Call and I Shall Answer
When lost seems all light
Not one thing going right
Friends leaving,
Coats turning,
Backs, stabbing
Hidden eyes ever judging
In flaunted lies delighting
Mockeries n... ever... whispering
Blood boiling, yet impotent
Bones ache, of e... very cruelty--- cogent
Secret strains choking at every breath
Hating the urge yet seeking solace in... thought of... rea... death
Pain and problems beyond control
The only vent--- spit and sweat
Blood and tears. Flood of tears,
And when but salt remains
Rasp, gasp, moan, groan
Quake with all sobbing
Blissful oblivion
At sobs' end
And awake
Once more
To sobs...
And yet
And yet
Yet
Yet
Listen to the beat of the w
Wake, wake, awake, awake
Five
Six
Seven
Eight...
...
...
...
...
Why are we still awake? ...
...
...
...
Talking, talking...
I can't understand them
Talking, talking-
I can't understand them
...
...
...
Babbling, babbling...
There's a barrier there
The sound...
Washes over me.
Maybe if I'd spent more time-
...
...
...
It's a blessing and a curse
Because I can't understand
And because I can't understand
...
...
...
And I can't sleep
Can't sleep...
...
...
...
...
I can't understand-
And...
I'm glad
I can't understand-
And...
I think...
I'm s
Asleep.
Loud buzz.
I’m awake?
Why is it dark?
Why is everything wet?
Heartbeat.
Growing urge.
Water?
Draining.
Water draining.
I’m floating.
I’m floating in the draining water.
Standing.
Wobbly legs.
Eyes. Open.
I’m in an observation tank.
Men.
Three of them.
White lab coats.
Experiment.
They smile at me.
Reflection.
My eyes are glowing.
Glowing yellow.
Skin.
Green skin.
Heartbeat.
Open.
Observation tank open.
First thought:
Run.
Running.
Running away.
Scared.
Scared of the men in white coats.
Sudden pain.
Pain in neck.
Falling.
Falling to the ground.
Eyes slowly closing.
Tired.
Awake.
Awake again.
Why can’t
I was Rip Van Winkle
And I slept through and tinkled
in my bed when others were getting mad
I was sleeping and watching reruns of Buffy
On Channel 23 where I saw other guys like me
content to sleep the rest of the week
and others were saying let it go
and I had done that a long time ago
Awesome! I told myself to stop sleeping
but then I had a snooze and felt much better
there is nothing stronger than the body repairing itself
while it rests under a duvet safe in slumber away from harm
and machinery that could take off your arm
But today I am awake
It's no joke
some snake bit me on the throat
now I see death when i close my ey
Haunted by expressions, I walk slowly through the night.
My mind is a forest, dark and grim.
I am alone with my thoughts.
I shouldn't be alone with my thoughts.
Interactions flash by.
The wrong words, the wrong smile, the wrong moment.
Everything wrong.
My incapability for human contact is astounding, truly.
I know what I did wrong, just... too late.
So my mind grows
a forest of failed communications and grave misinterpretations.
It is dark and looming.
I really shouldn't be alone with my thoughts.
They spur on my mind, keep me from sleeping.
Tomorrow, tired, I will only perform worse.
My failures haunt me, so my mind will continue thro