Catapedamaniai know they dont want me to jumpMore Like This
I have forever harbored inside me a fascination with edges.
My first memories are of standing on a cliff, wanting oh so badly for it to crumble under my feet. I saw a line separating earth and sky, and an urge rose in my chest to blur it.
This feeling of always being on the very tip of reality, wishing I could lose my balance and plummet, only intensified as I grew older. I found such sweetness in thoughts of stepping over sidewalk cracks to plunge into a world with nowhere left to stand on.
At the same time I was afraid normal boys didnt think of falling as I did, didnt want its escape from the cold, rigid ground. So I never mentioned it to anyone. But I didnt want to stop the desire blossoming inside me. I feigned interest in hiking and went out looking for the highest places to lose myself.
the throng is seething below, mindless chat