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Chaos, Incorporatedno one should ever try to
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access my brain.
it is a whirling, chaotic, thunderous storm,
27 years in the making,
blazing furiously with its array
of scars, fears, and anxieties on display,
preening for that poor soul who
misses a turn and ends up here;
90 miles an hour and fifteen hundred directions
is my mind in first gear.
logic gets unceremoniously sucked
into the vacuum of what if's
and if only's
creativity fractures at the mere
consideration of the near future -
dreams of hope light the brazier
and help the buzzing of uncertainty
stay warm until morning.
i have yet to find a way to
shut this off.
even at night,
on the verge of sleep
(or even while asleep!)
i wake gasping from my mental alarm clock
raging like it may, in fact, combust.
hey, do you remember this?
it screeches at me.
and before i can even muster a response,
the tornado lands,
all two thousand directions at various speeds -
i work to exhaustion
just to try and dodge the fly