Imagine: Social PhobiaImagine being afraidMore Like This
Imagine being afraid every time you have to talk to people
Imagine being afraid every time you have to call someone
Imagine being afraid every time you have to answer the door
Imagine being afraid every time you have to meet new people
Imagine having to isolate yourself just to feel safe
Imagine getting sick of the thought of going to the cinema
Imagine the loneliness
Imagine getting afraid every time a stranger asks you about something
Imagine the urge to change
Imagine the fear
Imagine thinking about what others think of you
Imagine wanting to run
Imagine almost throwing up of the thought of a new school
Imagine the others misunderstandings
Imagine their angry and disappointed faces
Imagine having to say no, even if you know that is the wrong answer
Imagine having the choice between pain and fear
Imagine the darkness
Imagine having to put yourself through fear
Imagine the questions
Imagine the weird glances
Imagine leaving your 'friends' behind
Imagine the fear o
Anxiety is...Anxiety means not eating in front of peopleMore Like This
I can't put a single morsel or crumb into my mouth, so long as there are other people around me
What if something gets stuck in my teeth?
What if I get something around my lips?
What if I just plain look like an idiot dropping the noodles from my fork each time I try to pick them up, with that annoyingly shaky hand of mine?
Anxiety means sitting at the corner of the class
I can't hear the teacher from here
But it beats being anywhere else
At least here I can wipe my nose if I need to whenever I have a cold, and no one will see me
Anxiety means not going to the mall
What if I see someone I know?
What if my mom embarrasses me with her loud talking?
What if people watch me when I'm picking out clothes and jewelry?
I'd rather stay home, sit in my chair the whole day doing nothing but art and writing fan-fictions
Anxiety means I need to use an inhaler
I can't breathe when I'm nervous
I can't talk, and when I do, I sound like a mess
I can't exhale;
Grow UpWhen I was young,More Like This
I knew a girl.
She was so warm and bright,
so I asked her that question
that all children must answer.
'What do you want to be
when you grow up?'
Her eyes lit up with joy
and she jumped with excitement.
No, an astronaut!
I'll be famous
and in movies!
will be everywhere!'
She listed so many more
until she finally just smiled
and looked at me with eyes filled
with child-like wonder.
'I could be anything I wanted.'
Years and years later,
I saw the same girl again
but her eyes no longer
lit up with wonder.
I asked her,
'What did you end up being?'
She smiled the hollow smile
that adults have when talking to the young.
'Not what I wanted to be
when I was young.'
Nothing more was said on the matter
but I could see that there was no more wonder
in the eyes that once shone so brightly.