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A is for OrangatanA is for OrangutanMore Like This
I dig my nails into the doorway. My throat is burning and dry. Tears drip off my chin and soak into the red musty carpet. My body is parallel to the floor below me as my teacher tries to pull me off the doorway. My mom attempts to reassure me in between screams but her voice is muffled by fear and determination to not let go. I can't give in. I just want to go home and hide in my bed with my blankie where I feel safe. My little fingers can't hold on anymore and finally I am inside the classroom. I cower in the corner on the beanbag chair. I feel so empty and alone and betrayed. "Why are they doing this to me? Are they jus
To Suffer In SilenceDo you see the little girl sitting in the corner, not eating her snack nor playing with the other kids-- just sitting all alone? The one who's twirling her hair, who has a blank expression on her face, like she‘s too intimidated to take in her surroundings? That was me.More Like This
I sat alone most days; this was nothing new. I had plenty of friends, of course, but they usually preferred to spend recess outside, running and playing and screaming rather than being quietly seated with me. And it's not the running and playing I had a problem with (Dad always used to tell me I could run really fast for a girl my age!); I quite enjoyed both. It's the sc
Being BraveSo you think you know meMore Like This
You think you've got me all figured out
But you don't know what it's like
To have all this insecurity and doubt.
So you want to know what's wrong
When tears are streaming down my face
You say you want to help me
But some scars you can't erase.
You plead for me to explain
As you squeeze my trembling hand
But I don't know what to say
That will make you understand.
These fears that haunt me daily
May seem small and dumb to you
But they control my mind
And there's nothing I can do.
You tell me to get over it
To step outside my cave
But you see, I cannot comprehend
This concept of being brave.
UnderstandingI see your smiles, and I smile back.More Like This
Ouch.
Something about the nice way you're treating me makes me feel even more left out.
Ouch.
I don't understand why you're being nice to me.
I don't understand why I can't just take the fact that you're being nice to me and just run with it.
Ouch.
Being around you guys is intoxicating, it makes me smile.
But you don't know me.
You'll never know me.
You'll never want to.
Ouch.
Even now, You give me this look like you accept me. How can you possibly accept me?
Ouch.
And then you treat me...like I'm nice.
You treat me like...you care about me.
Ouch.
I think you're lying.
Ouch.
But then I l
The TruthYou want to know the truth?More Like This
I envy you a lot
The bonds that you all share
Are what I've always sought
I don't think that I can
Ever have such things
Because of who I am
With my insecurities
I crave the touch of a friend
But I'm too scared to ask
I don't want to seem needy
So I'll just wear a mask
I'll keep it all inside
The loneliness and pain
Otherwise I'll burden you
Which will make me so ashamed
Although I don't deserve you
I don't want to be alone
To keep you from leaving me
I'll give up everything I own
FearToo scared to moveMore Like This
From the seat that I'm in
Too scared to speak,
I'm practically frozen.
Too scared to sleep
'Cause I know I'll soon wake
Too scared to stay up
I might make a mistake
Too scared to cry
Because people might see
And then they will wonder
What's the matter with me?
They'll ask me what's wrong
Prepared to give aid
But I cannot tell them
'Cause I'm too afraid.
Sta.sh
