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A Letter - FrUKDear Stupid Frog,
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I hate you. I hate everything about you.
You're a bloody pervert. You know just the right spots to make me moan louder.
Just because I'm bad at cooking, doesn't mean you make good food. So stop waking up extra-early on Sunday to make me my favourite breakfast. Even if it is one of the most delicious things I've ever tasted.
You're such a pansy. If we fight about something, you always end up backing off, even if we both know you're right, just so that I don't look stupid or anything.
You're weak, but you protect me anyway. That one day in the park, yeah, don't think I forgot. I remember how that guy tried to kidnap me when I fell asleep and you walked off to the bathroom for a little bit. You don't know how to fight. Yet you tried to beat him up, and you ended up getting beat up anyway, just for me.
You're a stupid hopeless romantic. Every day, you write a new romantic thing on the dumb whiteboard in my favourite colour of pen.
You don't stop saying things in Fr