Freaky Fred's PoemHello new friend, my name is FredMore Like This
the words you hear are in my head.
I say, I said my name is Fred,
and I've been... very naughty.
The story I'm about to tell,
I tell you, I will tell you well,
Is of my dear aunt Muriel,
and just how I've been... naughty.
Voila the farm. My aunt lives here,
with precious pup, and husband dear.
My heart beats fast as I drew near,
I feel so nice... and naughty.
I thought just how excited they,
must be that I would come today,
they'd shout "come Fred! huzzah! hooray!
Dear boy you look so... naughty."
That's when my tired eyes beheld,
a doggy dog, like dog, he smelled,
D-O-G, is what he spelled,
and that's how I spell... naughty.
Alone was I, with tender Courage,
and all his fur, his furry furrage,
which, I say, did encourage,
me, to be... quite naughty.
Courage... your hair...
it reminds me of the first time I knew just how,
I felt, about hair.
It was a day, I'd not forget,
the day that I first met my pet,
oh what a lovely gift to get,
I'd never felt so..
I Hate the Word Sexy[small rant, come give me advice, friends! ]More Like This
I don't know if it's me and my horrible self image problems, but I really hate when people call me sexy. I find it rude and vulgar, like you're only thinking of sex. Why not come up with a cute nickname like watermelon or cupcake? Then again, it probably doesn't help that my mental age is like 55, so I'm waaaaaay past that point in my life where I'd even consider it okay. Use the goddamned James Bond approach. I'll go with that. Way more classy than caveman style, bro. If I feel like you're horny a lot, that's a mega turn off to me u_u
"Each woman is different, so there is no specific cookie cutter answer; but anything said that objectifies, marginalizes and is too familiar can be deemed annoying and inappropriate." I like this guy. He's pretty smart.