SNAPE'S CHAT ADVENTUREMore Like This
SEVERUS SNAPE AND THE ONLINE HOGWARTS TEACHERS' LOUNGE
Snape sat down in front of his faithful tangerine iMac with a mug of cocoa. He had just spent sixteen consecutive hours wiring the castle up for an internal network and was now testing out the interoffice chat option. No one knows why he wanted this installed or what good it would do for the school. Somewhere along the line, Dumbledore had turned to Lupin and said, "Dude...you're gettin' a Dell." And it all went downhill from there.
Snape logged into his account and called up the program.
Login name: $N4P3_RU13$
_**You are now signed into the Hogwarts Staff Online Lounge.**
MacGonagrrl: LOL! No way.
Dmbledork: yeah I saw it on the west wing last night it ruled
$N4P3_RU13$: hey wat's goin on
** M41F0Y_0wnZ_j00 has just entered the room.**
Damn Hogwarts Rules~~~ Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts ~~~More Like This
1. Any resemblence between Dementors and Bin Laden is coincidental.
2. It is a bad idea to slip Professor Snape a powerful love potion.
3. Growing marijuana or cannabis plants is not an extra credit project for Herbology.
4. I should refrain from putting on Death Eater robes, a Death Eater mask and suchlike and go up to Professor Snape, and say, "Dude! Voldemort wants to kill you, he's found out!"
5. I am not allowed to lock Gryffindors and Slytherins in the Room of Requirement and see who comes out alive and who looks like theyve had a right shag.
6. Professor Flitwick's first name is NOT Dobby, no matter how short he is!
7. "OMFG!" is not a spell.
8. I will not refer to Professor McGonagall as 'My Goggly Goo-Goo!" or "McGonalds! McGonalds!"
9. I will not arrange an Aurors meeting in Malfoy Manor OR Nettos!
10. I will not begin Care of Magical Creatures class by singing, 'Can you dance the hippogriff' by the Hobgoblins in a bold voice,
PortraitsThe War was over and fear had been replaced with peace. The wizard's world was trying to slowly recover. The school of Hogwarts had been rebuilt and eventually students and staff had resumed their activities once again.More Like This
Hermione Granger still visited the school once in a while, whenever she had some free time, to help out professor (now headmistress) McGonagall, even though the witch kept assuring her that every problem they could possibly have was under control and that she should take her time to recover herself. But like many knew, she had a bigger heart than brain, and she was the brightest witch of her age.
One particular day she came inside McGonagall's office asking for professor Snape. Severus Snape had died in the War, but his spirit had been preserved on a portrait, much like Dumbledore's, the previous Headmaster. Minerva wasn't very surprised; it wasn't the first time she had asked for professor Snape. But Minerva gave her the typical answer she always gave her, that profess
Out of PracticeDisclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or the world or characters, and am making no money from this fanwork.More Like This
Summary: Severus Snape is not one for Christmas...or rather, he hadn't been until now. (SSxHG)
Out of Practice
It was common knowledge in the halls of the school – and in fact, the entire wizarding world – that Severus Snape Did Not Do Christmas. He did not like the music, the decor or holiday delicacies, nor the festive atmosphere. He did not embrace good will towards his fellow witches and wizards, nor did he tolerate pathetic seasonal gestures. The staff had long given up attempting to give him anything – there were not enough Galleons in Gringotts to make them even try to do so. Even saying “Happy Christmas” in passing to Severus Snape was enough to cause one fall under his Rather Terrifying Scowl. And if one was a student, well, at best your House lost a mere five points. (Not that that stopped him from attempting to take points fr
No One Should Cry AloneHermione moved quickly down the quiet hall. She was on her way to ask her potions master a question, and she was a little nervous. Professor Severus Snape was not particularly known at Hogwarts for his kindness and understanding. But, unfortunately, she had no choice. She had been working on her potions homework in the great hall when Draco Malfroy, a particularly annoying member of Slytherin House, had walked up behind her, peaked over her shoulder at her homework, and began to contradict practically her every pen stroke. They started to argue, and finally Draco dared her to go to Snape and ask him herself which one of them was right. She wasn’t too fond of the idea, but refusing Draco’s dare would probably have been worse.More Like This
So Hermione buckled down and headed quickly towards the office of the motions master. When she finally came to the door of Snape’s office she hesitated. She could feel her stomach churning within her. She reached out her hand to knock, when she he