Still the Same Girl (first Draft)The Abyss was tempting again tonight. Just a few steps away from Bell-mère's grave it called Nami to take a final rest, too. Let go, It whispered. You gave so much already. Nami was as weary as an old sail hanging limply in the wind. No fierce wind could fill her with joy again, it all seeped through the holes that had been torn into her.
“You're still the same girl.” Nojiko had told her. She couldn't have been more wrong. The girl that was Nami had died along with her mother as Arlong had shot her. Just when Nami had finally been ready to call Bell-mère by that name. Mother. And Nami had died again when she was forced to work for Arlong's crew. The flag that killed her mother forever stitched into her arm as an irremovable stain of sin. And then maybe a third time, as she told the other villagers and was shunned for betraying her own mother. She withheld the real reason why she did so, didn't want to share the burden. She had thought s
Old HandsGrandpa was always the one to do thingsOld Hands in Free Verse More Like This
-with his own hands.
He built his house,
our playhouses, tepees and dream castles
with his own hands.
Age 70 he was still climbing our roof,
(the one of the real house)
with his own hands.
So the worst thing
the worst thing
the worst thing was
when he had to watch our hands
-we all had come to help-
tend to his beloved garden
while his hands could do
The worst thing was
when he died
-on the inside-
'I am so useless.'
And I wished,
and I wished,
Safety Instructions“Warning, weak and fragile!”Safety Instructions in Free Verse More Like This
you labelled me,
because I broke.
“Replace when damaged!”
is your brand of trouble shooting.
You never read half the manual
before (ab)using the product,
otherwise you couldn't have missed this:
Important Safety Instructions
Note: Every human is breakable
without proper care and maintenance.
Caution: Too much pressure can cause mental injury.
Caution: Abrasive words might damage god's product.
Warning! Failure to talk things through can cause electric shock to the heart.
Warning! Persistent ignorance kills!
You didn't even read the signs written all over my face:
Caution, valuable, handle with care!
Frozen Hive MindYou are the mass,Frozen Hive Mind in Free Verse More Like This
I am the lone creature of difference.
You think the single thought
of the hive mind.
Because your strength is unity,
conformity is what you seek.
I seek the aberrant thoughts of innovation.
and an open mind.
I am what you are not:
my own self made individual.
RedecoratingMore persistent thanRedecorating in Free Verse More Like This
an irremovable black marker,
you engraved your words of love
into my practical stone heart.
You decorated that barren place inside of me
with flowers made of
your honest words,
your boyish smile,
your warm touch,
and the colour of your affection.
So gentle feelings began
to grow inside of me,
cracking open my stone heart,
forming a tiny gap,
just big enough for you to slip in.
How to find lost sheepIn case I seem strangely absent:How to find lost sheep in Free Verse More Like This
Please go after me and ask me how I am.
Chances are I am awfully lost.
Might be I am just busy
- lucky you, lucky you -
but please be prepared for an ugly truth.
I am likely to
EarthEarth,Earth in Free Verse More Like This
I crawled to your surface again.
I had been tangled up in
passageways carved through
the soil of my mind.
I grew new roots
to find nutrient matter
buried deeply below
shallow hearts and shallow minds,
buried deeply within
distorted fragments of broken selfs.
I feel your support again.
You gave me back solid ground
below my searching, stumbling feet.
Embracing me with your weathered hands,
you give me what I lost and found:
A place, a whole planet, a home for my soul.
I pray for WindI pray for windI pray for Wind in Free Verse More Like This
to press air into my depressed lungs,
for a gust
to blow my mind,
removing the black clouds,
for a gale
to push me forward,
out of this airless,
lifeless state of mine.
nothing but a dried leaf,
crumpled on the ground.
Please god, breathe
your breath of live
into me (again).
Let me dance
on the invisible wings
of your power.
ScaredGod, god, oh god, I am so scared.Scared in Free Verse More Like This
So so scared, to do what I yearn to do.
Scared, scared, oh so freaking scared,
to do what I need to do to live,
truly live – not just survive.
I am so shaking nervous
to let go of the tiny bird in my hand,
although I know holding on to it
won't do me nor it any good.
So, so, so afraid to fail
when hunting for the two in the bush,
ever evasive birds of peace of mind and freedom.
But I'll need both their wings
to finally fly.
MultiplicityI am not leftMultiplicity in Free Verse More Like This
to keep changing.
I am a landscape,
inviting you to get lost
in the details.
The thousand lives that carve my surface –
Can you feel them?
Can you see
the lingering lilac
is not my deepest colour?
Can you find
my innermost core
and grasp it
as just one
All Together DifferentI'll be your armAll Together Different in Free Verse More Like This
please be my leg.
We can not have too many eyes,
as every viewpoint is different.
My weakness is your strength
and I'll catch you where you fall.
all together different,
adapted just as much,
as required to make room
Because you are
what we have been missing.
We appreciate all your skills
and all our talents
are at your disposal.
Let us eternally rediscover
your new true self.
You are invited:
Be unique, be You.
Be curious, be Us.
Be part of the group
made of individuals.
NaruHina High School Chapter 1 A blonde hair boy was walking through the village trying to get to school. "Naruto!" a voice yelled from a distance. Naruto turned around and saw a girl with bubblegum hair and a boy with raven hair.NaruHina High School Chapter 1 in Romance More Like This
"Sakura! Sasuke!" he said surprised.
"So did you hear?" Sakura asked walking up to Naruto.
"Hear what?" he asked confused.
"That Hinata's coming back!" Sakura said excitedly.
"Who's... Hinata?" Naruto asked trying to remember.
"Baka..." Sasuke said. "How could you not remember who Hinata is?"
"Fine... Remember Shino and Kiba and that they died a long time ago?" Sakura asked another question but upset.
"Well yeah... How can anyone forget that..." Naruto said looking away.
"Hinata was like a sister to them so they died saving her." Sasuke said. "Hinata was blaming herself for what happened. It got to the point where Hinata ran away to get stronger."
NaruHina High School Chapter 2 Hinata kept running until her legs got tired. Soon she found herself at team 8's training field where Hinata, Kiba and Shino use to train together. She remembers the time when Akamaru pissed on Kiba. Hinata starts to remember the good times they had and couldn't help but smile while tears ran down her cheeks.NaruHina High School Chapter 2 in Romance More Like This
"Hinata... Please don't cry..." Hinata heard Kiba's words say as if he was in front of her. Hinata's eyes shot open as she saw Kiba, Akamaru and Shino standing in front of her. "Please stop crying..." Kiba said smiling.
"Kiba-kun... Shino-kun..." Hinata whispered as they started to fade. "No! Please don't go!" she yelled as she got up. "Don't leave me!"
"We want you to know that you've always been our little sister..." Hinata heard Shino tell her.
Hinata ran towards them crying... But then they completely faded away which caused Hinata to fall to the ground. She quickly turned around where they were standing bu
NaruHina High School Chapter 4 Finally Naruto and Hinata was on front of the class and Hinata was about to walk in until Naruto stops her. "Wait here..." he told her. Hinata looked at him confused. "Just trust me." he said smiling. Then walked in the class.NaruHina High School Chapter 4 in Romance More Like This
"Ah! Mr.Uzumaki... What toke you so long?" a woman with long hair asked Naruto.
"You have a visitor outside in the hallway." Naruto said as he toke his seat.
Hinata was looking at the painting that was hung up on the walls. "Hinata?!" she heard a woman's voice. Hinata turned around and was about to cry. "Is that you Hinata?"
Then Hinata drop her bag and ran to the woman and embraced her. "Kurenai-sensai..." Hinata cried.
"It's been so long..." Kurenai said hugging her back. Then pushed her away a little. "You've grown... A lot!" she said surprised. Then hugged Hinata again. "I've missed you."
"I'm sorry..." Hinata apologized crying. "It's my fault... It's all my fault..."
NaruHina High School Chapter 3 Since it was getting late Naruto walked Hinata home. Once Hinata was home Naruto made his way to his house. Naruto unlocked his door and went straight to bed. Then he just plopped on his bed and starred at the ceiling. 'Hinata...' he thought the turned to look at the moon. 'Everytime I look into your eyes... I can see... That you're crying... In darkness where there are no light...' Naruto thought. 'Dont worry Kiba... Shino... I'll be the one to pull Hinata out of the darkness...' he thought. "You better!" Naruto saw Kiba smiling before drifting to sleep. 'I promise...'NaruHina High School Chapter 3 in Romance More Like This
"What the-" Naruto said as he found himself a small white room. "Where am I?" he asks looking around.
"Naruto... Uzumaki..." he heard a woman's voice. Then he turned around and saw Hinata.
"Hinata?!" he said. Hinata was standing five feet away. "Where... Where are we?" he asked her.
"We're in Hinata's peaceful m
NaruHina High School Chapter 5***Naruto's Dream***NaruHina High School Chapter 5 in Romance More Like This
Naruto found himself in a small white room. "This is-"
"I see you're back..." said a voice. Naruto turned around and saw Hinata as a small kid.
"You're..." Naruto said shocked.
"My age gets younger when Hinata's happyness starts to disappear..." Hinata explained. "Right now... It seems to be 14 years old... And when I'm a baby... That's when Hinata truly has no happyness at all..." Naruto looks at her shocked.
"But she looks happy every day! She's smiling and laughing!! Like she is truly happy!!" Naruto yelled.
"She's smiling as if she's happy... But let me ask you something... When you smile... Are you actually smiling?" Hinata asked Naruto looked at her wide eyes. "When you're laughing are you truly laughing? Tell me... Naruto Uzumaki... Since you seem to know Hinata more than I do..."
Naruto looks at the groun
NaruHina High School Chapter 6 Naruto and Hinata were walking to school until a paper bomb was thrown at them. Naruto didn't sense it coming but Hinata did and tackled Naruto out of the way. Then slide in the ground. "Naruto-kun! Are you okay?!" Hinata asked.NaruHina High School Chapter 6 in Romance More Like This
"I'm fine... What about you?" Naruto asked helping Hinata up.
"I'm alright..." Hinata said smiling.
"Who are you and what do you want?!" Naruto yelled. Then five men that was wearing black cloaks with red clouds on them. Naruto looked at then shocked. "Akatsukis!" Naruto said angrily. "You here to take me with you?!"
"No... We're for the girl..." one of then said pointing at Hinata. "We need her power..."
Naruto ran in front of Hinata. "You're not gonna lay a finger on her!" he yelled.
"Naruto-kun..." Hinata said shocked. Then Sasuke, Kurenai and Sakura showed up.
"Naruto! What's going on?!" Sakura asked. Then sees the Akatsukis in front of them. "They're her
Being Okay Is The Hardest Thing We DoBeing Okay Is The Hardest Thing We DoBeing Okay Is The Hardest Thing We Do in Free Verse More Like This
because being okay is expected,
if we’re not okay, that’s not okay,
what can we do to be okay?
we can scribble illegible words
on a canvas made for by painters
masquerading as notebook paper,
and hope that we can sell the burn
of stinging emotions for some paper.
but the funny thing about that thought?
is that american money isn’t paper,
it’s 75% cotton and 25% linen fibers.
so even the money you'd earn from your misery,
isn't anything you can write on
when you realize your money isn't
made to heal. even if it does talk.
but it never really ever says enough, does it?
But that's okay...
being okay is the hardest thing we do
because sticks and stones do break bones,
but you can hide the scars
with a jacket or longer sweatshirt.
or put on pants as opposed to athletic shorts.
words kill, words heal, and words are so much more.
and you can't hide the scars that riddle your face,
the way your
GhostGhostGhost in Free Verse More Like This
i hold my own wrist,
as if it's broken,
'cause there are no hands,
available left to hold it.
to rest in the base
of your touch cannot happen.
it's much too tough to ask.
so i sit staring
into a blank field,
body in reverie,
mind in ennui,
sick of you and i.
i love you
but hate i fell too
deep into the pool,
of what I thought was true.
5 feet, 5 inches,
around my 5'7'' frame,
now left a shell.
my arms hold me,
as i clutch my abdomen,
and rest against the floor.
i lie there,
knowing the pain
will finally stop
that it's just beginning.
because the hardest
part about this,
is loving a ghost
that isn't dead in body,
but in your mind,
and you can't kill her,
no matter how much
you wanna take the gun
and pull the trigger.
so i let pellucid phantoms
perplex the crevices
of my intricate labyrinth.
and i let the apparition
fly around inside,
before it fades and dissipates,
just like the b
Good (Great, Greater, Greatest, You)Good (Great, Greater, Greatest, You)Good (Great, Greater, Greatest, You) in Free Verse More Like This
I hope the title caught your eye,
because this is about you.
Many of us speak in superlatives
and ambiguous language.
In imagery-laden text masquerading
underneath double entendres
keeping us from a part of the truth.
But purple streaks and red bands,
harp strings and soft hands
don't begin to explain
the love I have for you.
So I lay these words down
simple in its vulnerability,
blemished and raw in its purity.
The term lissome fits you in many ways,
but not necessarily it its textbook form.
I speak on the part that is not readily seen
but what is easily most cogent.
Your consciousness' cognizance
is graceful in the way
you fold one syllable over
another, supple in its meaning
that can take many forms
going from idle lies
to how we idolize hollow eyes
and uncovered hip bones.
Elegance is an understatement,
but I refuse to speak in cliche superlatives.
I speak honestly
but not with exaggerated grandeur.
Because your immediate app
ObsoleteObsoleteObsolete in Free Verse More Like This
my mind revels in antiquity,
the shadows of tomorrow.
showing shaded silhouettes
of the future,
while phantoms paint pasts.
parasol the sun.
eclipse of what was,
sprinkling flashes of dust
and what could be.
but what could've been
is nothing but a memory.
and these fading reflections
are not your grandmother's antiques.
Froth And WingsFroth And WingsFroth And Wings in Free Verse More Like This
i reside in the corners
of white-tiled floors,
knees pressed to my chest
like a covetous courtship
brought together by taken lovers.
steam rising from the water
that's sliding down tub walls,
overflowing as the hot liquid
seeps under my worn toes.
ravaged by the road i've taken
and refuse to exit off of.
i nestle my forehead
against the top of my kneecap,
and tighten my arms
around my calves
as if curling into a ball
will help me roll around
from corner to corner,
hitting every insecurity i own
with no way to dodge it.
i pull myself closer together,
tighter and tighter
like a gymnast
and my shoulder blades
stretch my skin,
until the marrow
spreads like wings
across my broken back.
as my eyes shut
like a venus flytrap
wrapping around its meal.
and i sit there,
my frame distorting
and contorting itself
around the withering heart
and sorrow left
like a dying rose.
and the water holds my ankles
MalignmentMalignmentMalignment in Free Verse More Like This
You're so dramatic,
hot and cold in the
same fractured sentence.
You frustrate me;
like a picture frame
that isn't quite centered right.
Left hanging by a thread
that maybe it'll look okay
from a different angle
or a different light.
But us, no matter what angle,
or day or night,
we were like puzzle pieces
that didn't fit.
And it drove me crazy to see
those two pieces
just sitting away from the game,
that we had a misaligned frame.
We were never on the same level.
You, you were a constant
temptation to insanity
with your ill-chosen words,
protestations of 'I love you'
and whispers beneath the sheets.
The road to your goodwill
stretched out to forever,
and I grew so tired of
trying out configurations;
the countless positions
that never quite seemed
to startle my senses,
although they always
Your tongue was a cliché
But it wasn't the polished edge,
I was most concerned about.
It was t
Show love, everyone! It's a beautiful thing.Soooo, I have a journal idea I think everyone will love. I want people to comment on this journal with people they love! Pretty easy, right? Mention/tag (Whatever term you wanna use. ) people that you love for whatever reason! And if you'd like, add a small (Or large! ) blurb why! Here, I'll start!Show love, everyone! It's a beautiful thing. in Personal More Like This
WeirdAndLovely, because she's the most beautiful girl on the planet to me. She's smart, witty, charming, and I'm so glad she's my girlfriend. She's a brilliant artist and I love her so damn much.
SpriteBlayde, because Kelsy is my longest (and best) friend. She's been here for me through thick and thin, when so many people have come, gone, tried to come back and left again, she's been the constant for me for two years. And I couldn't be more grateful for that. She's my sister!
A-Lovely-Anxiety, because she's my favorite 49er. So brilliant, beautiful, intelligent, and a wonderful sister of mine. We'll always be southern 49ers
Bite Your Tongue Till It BleedsBite Your Tongue Till It BleedsBite Your Tongue Till It Bleeds in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Speak now or forever hold your peace,
Or is it piece?
‘Cause if I hold this piece of my mind,
To myself, there will be no peace,
Only an explosion of the mental mine
That riddles mine.
I’m no man, I’m a mime,
Holding his hands over his mouth,
Biting my tongue so these words have no way out,
With my eyes half-lidded, the other half brimmin’,
With tears near the bottom half of the rim,
Ready to fall like rainwater races down a windowsill.
Angry to the point where I wish I could control the skies,
Rain down Hell and fury that has built up inside,
And watch my furious vision destroy the night.
But this is not me,
This not how I am,
Nor how I will ever be.
It’s just that I’ve been holding my peace
For such a long damn time.
Now it just seems the only “peace” I’m holding,
Are pieces of my mind.
CurrentsCurrentsCurrents in Free Verse More Like This
Some men yearn to clasp
The edges of stars by their fingertips
To at least hold onto the debris,
That creates golden iotas
In midnight oceans;
And whispers of olden tales,
Singing of a microscopic sphere,
That twinkles within the vastness of emptiness.
But I yearn to hold wind in a jar,
Capture the oxygen
And never let go of its essence.
Carry it with me.
Take it to a place only she and I know of,
And cradle the edge of her hand,
Into the wrinkles and crevices
Of my solemn grip.
I’m not big, nor very strong,
And I don’t have the power
That could protect you,
From all of the injustices
That could befall you—
But what I do have,
Are my hands to hold yours,
To feel the warmth of my palm,
Meld into your grasp.
A body to shield you from the
Debris of falling dust,
And descending storm.
That can cushion gusts,
And quell hurr
A Week Of KissesA Week Of KissesA Week Of Kisses in Free Verse More Like This
The first day I told you I loved you,
I imagined kissing your shoulder,
Well before I thought about your lips.
Because I don’t know what I am doing, firstly,
But more importantly,
It’s because I know things can spiral quickly,
If things start shifting
After we lay down the concrete.
So I kiss the foundation,
Before we reach the soil.
The second day I told you I loved you,
I imagined kissing your elbow,
Because it holds together the touch
And the flex.
To exhibit it,
I must kiss the joint that bends
And combines us together.
The third day I told you I loved you,
I lay my lips to your temples,
As I learned about the temple of reform,
For the Youth in North America.
Kissing you there signifying I will protect you,
As well as your temple,
As we re-form, into something more.
The fourth day I told you I loved you,
I’d kiss you softly on your forehead.
Because that’s what holds your brillian
Moving OnAll I can tell you isMoving On in Free Verse More Like This
I haven't gotten far
twenty years of yesterday.
Beautiful LiesYou painted a neon yellow streakBeautiful Lies in Free Verse More Like This
across my ankle
and told me I was art.
I raked a venomous red line
across your throat
and replied: and you're a liar.
Unwilling AwakenessThe sea never falls asleepUnwilling Awakeness in Free Verse More Like This
it shuffles, half drowning
in its own unspent dreams,
trying desperately to stay afloat
its glittering eyes reflecting stars
as it shudders and groans
under the weight of another day,
as the sun turns to treacle
and spreads itself thinly
across its ridge-d-back.
It tumbles and trips over,
clumsy in its deprivation state,
and tosses its limbs, its head,
over and again. It stays awake.
It can't afford to dream of rain
drumming upon its lonely door
to accompany it for eternity,
No. The sea can never fall asleep.
GangrenousThe bloated tongue full of heliumGangrenous in Free Verse More Like This
that escapes the ephemeral and lifts up, skyward –
is stuck in a congealed throat
draped with the closed curtains of bile and blood
souping a dam across her vocal chords. No more words.
The hair is brushed, later, out of its nooseloops
until it is straight and lies flush with the velvet,
in a box only just big enough to bury the dreams of a life
lived without pain
bubbling out of the now dead lips with each breath.
Skin soft turns hard – in the way that all girls do as they age
but she does not age.
She couples only with the wooden box, painted falsely white,
that covers her body and face.
It is the concealer, the mascara, the war paint never worn.
The chemicals of her unusually sewn-together body,
combine in a way geneticists cannot explain
to exude the only smell it can. Of her –
but it is not the familiar any longer. Not the smell of milk and dust.
Now, the acids boil together, to purge her of her pain.
The familiarity of her fades
Beneath the RoseI can't burn the street down, the tar will fill our lungs,Beneath the Rose in Free Verse More Like This
I can't fix the bridges, or the bolts bedded in our tongues.
I can't explain the constant, buried deep beneath the rose,
with all the other things I broke; death and all erodes.
How She BurnsShe has astral eyesHow She Burns in Free Verse More Like This
and the tongue of a phoenix
that scorches you
should you dismiss her.
With those milky whites
with a galaxy dropped in
and spooling in the iris
she sees right through.
She has asteroid eyes
that flicker so fast
you might not notice -
you just might not
notice the milky ways
that a galaxy dropped in
spools in the iris
of a phoenix gone wild
Holding a Hostage - Draft One /I daren't close my eyesHolding a Hostage - Draft One / in Free Verse More Like This
The moment I do
You may dissapear.
I clutch at your body
Pressed between you
and the slate flooring we chose together
You and I.
I stroke your hair and murmur
My tearful confessions
- You've heard them a thousand times before.
There are sirens, love
and they come for me
They come for us.
They seek to part us, my darling
and I cannot let them.
No battering ram or tear gas
Could bruise me more
Nor make me cry more
I kiss your face
and try not to remember
How you looked when I fell in love with you.
You're not so different angel,
Not so different
Don't you fret. We will be fine.
He wants you
He is calling for your body
He longs to pull you to his darkened room
and have his evil way with you.
He longs to pour over your every pore
and delight in my misery.
He shall not.
They are smashing windows, sweetheart
and still I cannot move from here
Cannot bring my arms to loosen
From their stronghold round your
DesperationYour spine is a secretDesperation in Free Verse More Like This
my fingers can uncode.
Your vertebrae cracks open,
your secrets are exposed.
I suck out the tender marrow
and scrape flesh off the bone
hoping; if I absorb you
I will no longer feel alone.
How to get more views on your LiteratureHow to get more views on your LiteratureHow to get more views on your Literature in Art Features More Like This
This article is an exploration of a common question on DeviantART in the Literature community; "How do I get more views?" If you read all of this you win a pony.
Lately there has been a lot of discussion around the site about ways to expand the literature community and the visibility of literature on the site. It has been noted that a lot of people believe that site changes by the DeviantART team will help them get more attention for their work. It has also been noted in the past that when new features are instigated (such as more html, better thumbnails and stash) that people often interpret whether or not they have a direct positive effect on their own views as a way of telling if the new feature is worthwhile or not.
It has been suggested that the community and individuals therein should themselves take more responsibility for creating opportunities and maximising poten
For JDBA lot of people talk about when life begins. Some say it begins at conception. Love, however, can begin a long time before that. You can love the idea of a child, the notion, the plans for a future. You can love the dreams and the hopes. Similarly, although a life has a definitive ending, love does not.For JDB in Emotional More Like This
Even when a child is taken from us far too early the love remains, the traces that they were there remain in our hearts and minds, because love is not tied to a finite space of time. It doesn't know days, weeks, hours. All love knows is the beauty of another being and the pain of the loss of them.
The only comfort we can take from all of this is that if our love for a child is not linked with how long they are alive for, it makes sense that neither is their love for us. That is how love endures, and surrounds us all everyday, and helps us survive the difficult business of living on without them. So today is a day for tears and healing and remembering the spaces in our hearts where those
Das Paradies der MottenIch hab mich dafür aufgegeben,Das Paradies der Motten in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Dass dein Flügelpaar verheilt.
Verlernte Fliegen - und mein Leben
Hat das Meer und mich geteilt.
Ich habe sogar Gott verzundert,
Teufel aus dem Staub getanzt
Trotz all dem staune ich verwundert,
Dass du wieder fliegen kannst.
Der Himmel zerrt an deinen Füßen,
Angst verfeinert dein Gesicht
Und lässt mich für das Gute büßen:
Deine Hand hält meine nicht.
Wie könnte ich dich gehen lassen,
Dafür liebe ich zu sehr.
Wenn deine Leiden jetzt verblassen
Wiegen meine doppelt schwer.
Die Schwingen sind mir abgestorben,
Meine Hände schenkten Trost
Und haben deinen Hals umworben,
Weil du unser Glück bedrohst!
Die Hölle ist für wahre Motten
Schöner als das Paradies;
Das Blut soll mir im Fleisch verrotten
Wenn die Liebe uns verstieß.
Am Boden halten meine Arme
Deine Flügel fest wie einst.
Erlaubst du, dass ich mich erbarme?
Kümmert es dich, dass du weinst?
Puppenglanz und ScherenschnittDeine Haut begehrt mein Auge,Puppenglanz und Scherenschnitt in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Weiß und schneidend wie Papier;
Da ich nicht zum Töten tauge,
Nehme ich den Tod von dir.
Gib mir doch auch deine Hände,
Viel zu viel war nie genug;
Deine stillen Angstzustände
Nehme ich mir Zug um Zug.
Atemzüge voller Leere
Fülle ich mit deinem Duft,
In der Hand ruht eine Schere -
Lungenflügel brauchen Luft...
Weil ich dich liebe, weil ich dich begehre,
darf es niemals enden.
Weil mir nichts bliebe, bis auf diese Schere,
scharf in meinen Händen.
Rück´ die Kleidung wieder gerade.
Augen trinken sanften Schein.
Heute wird die Maskerade
Starr wie alle Tage sein.
Niemand will die Narben küssen,
Die ein Kuss doch erst erdacht;
Weil wir leise büßen müssen
birgt ein jeder Laut Verdacht.
Schließ' die Lippen, lächle, lautlos.
Wieso stehst du denn nicht auf?
Wieso wölbt sich deine Haut bloß
Derart in den Stahl hinauf?
Weil ich dich liebe, weil ich dich begehre,
Darf es nicht so enden.
Weil mir nichts bliebe, bis auf diese Schere,
Schlaf in meinen Händen.
RuheturmNoch Gestern war das Leben lichter,Ruheturm in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Als der Leuchtturm Nebel warf;
Der Tag war schlicht, die Angst war schlichter
Und der Dunst begrenzte scharf.
Von allem und uns selbst verlassen
Geh`n wir einsam, Hand in Hand,
Von über Nacht ergrauten Massen
Bis zum weiß betäubten Strand.
Vor allem von mir selbst verlassen,
Weil die Hülle Hölle heißt,
Kann ich den schwarzen Hund nicht fassen,
Der in meine Verse beißt:
Der schwarze Hund der Depression,
Er liebt uns, denn wer liebt uns schon?
seastormI,seastorm in Free Verse More Like This
at the sea(m)s
of tidal vacancy;
I am the ocean, and
the moon has
cling to reason,
I stumbled on
abrupt. bedridden yet
ever chas(m)ing, I
fell to salt-soaked
ground from a
words were all it took
but all you do is take.
I am waking
and I am shaken
tsunami waves that break
in empty frantic fury;
the briefest repose
or instant of stillness,
I yearn; instead
I am abandoned by language,
I am bound to languish beneath
tempests that swell,
even the most desperate of breaks
for the shore.
eggshells in my throatI am cradled,eggshells in my throat in Free Verse More Like This
rustling ribcage bursting
in feathered fragments
through still air,
and you ask what's wrong
but each breath is a triumph;
words would be a desperate freefall
I cannot fly--
I'm barely crawling.
I am embraced,
entwined in almost-whispers,
struggling, and I flinch away
from compassion; it would be kinder
just to leave.
I am caged,
my cries for help flutter in
wing-beat echoes from
larynx to lip
only to collide,
beaten and bruised,
with the towering walls
resurgencelet's make small talk,resurgence in Free Verse More Like This
six month silence swelling;
sticking inside our throats,
filling the space between us.
let's make small talk
and skirt furtive eyes around
the absence we never quite
accustomed ourselves to.
this is easy,
but then it's always been
we move lightly,
an oh-so similar
let's make small talk,
stumble on faux pas promises
and the intimacy between two
who are no longer intimate.
orbiting the past,
we dance in words.
here, stilli must confess,here, still in Free Verse More Like This
i have walked the highway's edge
flirting with the sidewalk, and
wondering whether to take
the one step towards the
rushing waves of traffic
i have balanced upon precipice
after precipice gazing downward,
the finality of flight a strange
and dangerous daydream
that pulls me in
and i have stood at water's ending
the sea a susurrous caress, and
yearned to move forward once,
again, again, until the ocean
can carry me home
so many storms i have weathered
so many burdens i have shouldered
and yet sometimes i forget the
most important thing of all;
i have made it this far,
i am here
i am worthy
i will go on.
post-conflagrationoh, darling, look at us;post-conflagration in Free Verse More Like This
a crooked collection of
ashen-faced chaotic nobodies,
struggling to stand straight.
we used to burn so bright,
but we're just now learning
why no-one loves fireworks
after they've gone out.
rebirth celestialAs craters crackle the skinrebirth celestial in Free Verse More Like This
I hear the tumultuous waves,
crashing down from the hollow bowl.
And the terra firma
begins cracking and creasing,
under the weight of space.
These are the sounds of the Earth,
as we undergo an evolution,
as opposed to infinite revolutions.
I often lie under the atmosphere
and watch melisma pour forth from
the stars, an enchanting acciaccatura
blink of an eye.
It is all too easy to feel alone,
but the vast depths of the sky hold me;
a cold but familiar comfort.
With the soil underneath my feet,
folding under the curl of my toes,
I lay underneath her
bare to the earth.
The brisk winds play cloak
around the piloerection of my skin.
The terrestrial sphere painted
the color of ravens
from the silhouette's tempera.
The jet acrylic kisses my pores,
as I rest under her stygian blanket.
And oh, what a rapturous darkness,
and what ephemeral illuminations;
the starlit path from collarbone to cheek
illustrating infinite shades of forever
in her skin, on her skeleton
cenotaph of stormsthe first thunderstormcenotaph of storms in Free Verse More Like This
was triggered by a blunt pair
of scissors, sparking violently
against the lightning,
shaking in the wind.
the downpour pierced,
tattooed with no ink but
the dark bleakness
of an overcast morning,
infiltrating uniformed wrists.
hid behind the music block,
shaky raindrops rioting
fears, she fractured.
the second storm
wept a two year downpour
outline that dripped from wrist
to hip, sidelong silhouette glances
obscured by the rain.
stalictidal waves shuddered
frozen, until icy glass
fell in stained shards from
the stillness inside.
thinner, brittler, growing
in flurries of sleet and hail,
her outline was never filled,
though the floods threatened
the third thunderstorm
was a mist-ridden melancholia,
a dream for permanence
smeared in ink through
fueled by the hope
that just this once,
the rain would spark a
rebirth beneath the ground.
instead, a tsunami
washed away the ink
as tides so often do.
HopeThere are so many daysHope in Free Verse More Like This
when humanity frightens
the most compassionate
it takes only a knife
or a word or a gun, and
we scare so easy.
I'm tired of living
I'm tired of not believing
There may not be a god above
but believer or not,
there are so many
reasons to love
I'm not giving up
I'm not letting go;
I'm going to dream
and one day
perhaps I will fly
and I will believe
the best of people
until it kills me,
because the moment
that you give up
is the moment
you become the problem.
those who lie behind eyelidsi. benjamin ithose who lie behind eyelids in Free Verse More Like This
we watched silent films.
you bought an excitable child sweets
with money you couldn't spare.
i often wish
you were still
we hid devotion
in quiet moments.
i had always mocked those
who claimed that
innocence is bliss,
your innocence was blissful.
nearly four years past
but you're still so present
a specter spectator
lying arrogant, indolent
on the sidelines of me;
chaining me close.
v. benjamin ii
your lips were always dry
and you gave up too soon.
when you left, i spent
forty-six sleepless nights
on the living room sofa;
i couldn't go near the bed.
you looked right through me,
searching only for the
in his eyes.
heaven closed up shop
when we passed by;
forever fell ill and fled.
i can't help but wonder
if i haunt your silences
the way you inhabit
symphony stellataone of my earliest memories -symphony stellata in Free Verse More Like This
my mother, steadfast mentality
slowly driving her forward, repeating
repeating re-pea-ting bar by bar
nocturne number eight in d flat major;
never anything less than perfection,
even when fingertips wear thin,
when patience wears thinner,
and chopin fades into dusti am a child born of icy constellations,
cigarette smoke, and canorous chords,
composers whispering at the edge of my sensesblack-garbed, it's grandmother's funeral -
my violin cries massenet's méditation.
my thirteen year-old heart has never
felt so incapable of expression,
so goddamn inadequate, and d major
has never sounded so heartbroken.
we return to a phone call from father,
his composure cracking as he tells us
we'll be doing this all over again;
96 hours, two grandmothers gone,
now all i have is massenet and
it isn't fairwe'd never know it by looking at the sky,
but countless stars waxed requiem to
create us; cenotaphs in the empyrean blacksixteen years old and i can breathe -
Things I would Tell Her--C.I want to tell her the thingsThings I would Tell Her--C. in Free Verse More Like This
I'll tell her when she’s older,
but the information terrifies her.
In order of importance:
she has luna moths in her head,
monarch butterflies in her stomach,
and a feral fetus in her womb.
are collapse-clasped and folded
in her lap;
she holds her elbows like wings
away from her ribs,
ready to flap,
I want to tell her
to keep one hand in her purse
so she can always find her keys,
to keep an eye on the door
and the door always open
so she can run if she doesn't feel safe,
but her cheeks are rorschach-splotch red
and the tension in her shoulders
warns me she's not ready
to hear this.
And there is the possibility that
maybe I’m not ready to tell
I’m just as devastated as her;
that she is surrounded by friends and family
who are violated by a community
where no man can say yes all men.
Tell Me What You've Gone and Done NowIt seems like everybody writes about romance,Tell Me What You've Gone and Done Now in Free Verse More Like This
the murmurs left behind,
the lonely strength of men,
the evolution of goodbye.
There will be times when I tell you I can't
be a number on a list.
I was what you are, once--
the dying star of a memory--
but you must have mistaken me
I can bring your candle to glitter again,
but I can't be your oxygen.
Yes, my bed's a single--
where did you sleep last night?
Fragile Magpie MoonsIt's only spring when you first wake up,Fragile Magpie Moons in Free Verse More Like This
two magpies and the dull ache of menstrual cramps
tapping on. Death's window
sleeps in all our bones,
a dripping water faucet.
Brittle things--like love,
a jar of not-quite-nothing--
small and fragile and ours
are the presences we carry
while running from the moon.
Dark AshAbove a cerulean waterfall,Dark Ash in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
a mountain's broken peak
suffocates in an ash-dark sky.
Broken StillnessThere's a stillness to missing youBroken Stillness in Free Verse More Like This
that creeps up, a stalking phantom,
in silent moments. Breathless
and whispering, the night is your
shadow--alive, it scoops
the secrets lining my ribs
with clawed hands. You told me,
once, that watching me flit
around the room
was the best part of your day.
I put googly eyes on all
my pictures of you; maybe tomorrow,
I'll find the strength to admit
you're gone. Lost. Never coming
home. For now, I talk
to these faded print-outs
and tap the glass
to watch your eyes move.
We're Not the Ringlings--C.Please, please say you’ll never let me go.We're Not the Ringlings--C. in Free Verse More Like This
We’re performers (not sure if that’s good though),
Swinging high, flying low,
Dancing around, static love.
Double-talking with multiple meanings in one language.
On the trapeze of a
Time Ticking OnAt the bottom of the ocean,Time Ticking On in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
air bubbles leak like sand--
an inverted hourglass.
AftershocksIn the dark of the cemetery,Aftershocks in Free Verse More Like This
I feed my troubles to ghosts--
a complaint about fickle muses
to Wyoming's Poet Laureate circa 1992
falls on deaf ears;
he's too busy wailing rhymes
over his wife's silent grave
to hear about the silence circling my veins.
A story or two about my health
is given to a doctor who passed three years ago;
he haunts the oldest sections he can find
in his stethoscope pajamas.
Tonight, he diagnoses the cracks
in the headstones. An improvement.
Mostly, he measures his own pulse
and mutters to himself.
Sometimes, a pair of knights on painted stallions
rush each other from across the hills--
the clash of the impact they never make
is more jarring than the screams that come just before dawn
from the Janes and Joes buried without closure.
Between the markers for Iris and Ivanov,
I come across a woman hunched, shoulders shaking,
over a recent dig and I stop to listen.
She reads my favorite Shakespeare sonnets
between her tears, and on the wind,
I catch hints of her vani
Mastering MeIn another universe,Mastering Me in Free Verse More Like This
I have green eyes, curly hair,
and paint smeared across all my fingers--
a war cry of artistry
instead of needlepoint scars.
The pooch of my belly
and the lumps in my thighs
might be from anything else
but the insulin I inject four times a day.
I grow up a child, not a parent,
the master of my destiny
not running away but running toward;
I'm a little bit taller
in spirit and stature,
in all the ways that matter
when darkness creeps under the door
and phantoms howl.
I shave my legs every day
instead of once every month
once every three months
once every only now and again when I feel like it
and I'm confident--
a goddess with the stars
around her neck
instead of pearls--
in any type of heel.
In another universe,
I still trust myself
behind the wheel of a car;
I have mastered winged eyeliner
and smokey lids;
I gave up chocolate
or whatever it is
that brings on migraines
just because I could,
just because it's better for me,
Silhouetting Silence (005)You scrapedSilhouetting Silence (005) in Free Verse More Like This
unbreakable vows to the dead
into red bricks and tile floors
with jagged fingernails,
huffing snarls at the moon
to hide the noise
of your grief.
When the sun peaked
outside time-dusted windows,
you locked yourself away
and left me surrounded
Loss was heavy
on my shoulders,
a corset tight around my ribs,
closest to noon;
I spent my days
silhouetting your words
with numb fingers
and a tongue tied with screams,
if at all--
I was buried.
Erzaehl was"Erzähl du doch mal was über dich"Erzaehl was in Free Verse More Like This
Ich weiß nie was ich darauf erwiedern soll.
Mein ganzes Leben hab ich so viel gelogen,
hab so viel gesagt und getan,
was alles nicht ich selbst war.
In dem ganzen Durcheinander hab ich mich verloren.
Wie sollen andere mehr über mich erfahren,
wenn ich mich nicht mal selbst kenne.
Tag für Tag, mit jedem Atemzug,
werde ich durchsichtiger.
Ich fühle mich wie Papier.
Ich bin ausgemärgelt,
wie zu wenig Butter auf zu viel Brot verstrichen.
"Hi, schön dich kennen zu lernen. Wer bin ich?"
LebenEgal was wir in unserem Leben tun,Leben in Free Verse More Like This
egal welche Entscheidungen
wir "richtig" oder "falsch" treffen,
egal wie wir aussehen oder sind,
das Leben geht weiter.
Irgendwie, auf Umwegen oder Abwegen,
es sucht sich auf jeden Fall seinen Weg.
Ob Scheitern oder Aufstieg,
ob gut oder schlecht,
das Leben geht weiter.
Bis wir uns entscheiden
es zu beenden.
Der noch so kleinste Tropfen,
kann das Fass zum überlaufen bringen.
ich, konsumentSind wir nicht alle nur Elendstouristen,ich, konsument in Free Verse More Like This
die das eigene Level der Zufriedenheit
am Unglück und Verlust anderer messen?
Unser Selbstbild ist bestimmt von den Medien.
Was soll ich essen,
was soll ich trinken,
was soll ich schenken,
was muss ich unbedingt haben.
Oh, große Medienimperien,
sagt mir, wer bin ich?
Die Fettabsaugemaschiene im eigenen Geist.
vergessenEs ist soweit.vergessen in Free Verse More Like This
Ich habe es vergessen.
Und das Schlimmste ist,
ich kann es nicht schreiben.
Meine Gedanken sind nichtssagend.
kein Gefühl in mir,
was zu Blatt gebracht werden kann.
Wie beschreibt man absolute Leere?
Nicht einmal das "Nichts" in mir
Auf Aktion folgt Reaktion.
Zerfließe in meinem Alltag.
Schneemann im Sommer.
GehirnkotzeIch bin der singende, tanzende Abschaum der Gesellschaft.Gehirnkotze in Free Verse More Like This
Mental bepisst vom Publikum meiner verkappten Selbstzerstörung,
deren Auslöseknopf schon bei der Geburt gedrückt wurde.
Fühl mich trotz psychischem Goldregen der Meute mehr old als gold.
Die Leute nennen mich Verrückt. Schlampe. Wrack.
Die Leute sagen vieles.
Dabei haben die doch nur keine Ahnung, wie der Hase läuft.
Hat ganz schön Speed vom ganzen Speed, der Mümmler.
Ich scheiß' auf die Gesellschaft und zieh' mir die nächste Bahn.
Alles Heuchler und Scheinmenschen,
nur den verrückten kannst du unter die Maske schauen.
AllesDu musst es sein.Alles in Free Verse More Like This
Du warst es.
Warst Gefühl und Leidenschaft,
warst Angst und Trauer,
warst Wut, warst Vergebung.
Du warst es,
warst alles und viel mehr,
warst Himmel, warst Erde,
warst Mond und warst Sterne,
warst Sonne, warst Licht.
Du warst wir.
Und du warst ich.
Doch ich war es nicht,
denn ich wollte nicht,
weil ich nicht merkte,
dass du alles bist,
Meine Sehnsucht, meine Liebe,
meine Muse, mein Antrieb,
Geh', und nimm sie mit
Mach mich stolzIch wollte einfach nur in den Spiegel schauenMach mich stolz in Free Verse More Like This
und jemanden sehen, auf den man stolz sein kann.
Das ist mein Gedanke, mein Ansporn.
Egal, wie oft es schief geht,
wie schlimm ich scheitere,
wie tief ich sinke
und wie oft ich falle.
Egal, wie oft du mich fragst,
was ich mir dabei denke
oder wie ich so etwas tun kann,
ich will, dass es irgend etwas gibt,
was du in mir siehst und schätzt.
Auf diesem Weg will ich alles probieren,
jedes Projekt starten, alle Hürden meistern,
um das Eine zu finden, worauf du stolz sein kannst
ich möchte jemand sein.
SeelenwohlImmer erhebst du deine Stimme.Seelenwohl in Free Verse More Like This
Schreist so laut du kannst,
Doch eigentlich sagst du nichts.
Die Worte, die du verlierst,
denn dein Kampf ist vergebens,
der er schon lange verloren ist.
Du weisst es,
doch dem Unmut muss Gestalt,
den leeren Worten Gehör gegeben werden.
.when her love left, it left. in Free Verse More Like This
the house empty
and she says
i hope one day it'll
come back to me,
cos i don't keep this shotgun
on my front porch for nothin'
.she calls down angels. in Free Verse More Like This
just to burn their
to see them rise then
fall, those flailing
she tells them, this
is what it's like
to be human
and they say judgement
will arrive for you, my
girl, you will be
cleansed by burning
and i strike another match
.she wants to taste the moon. in Free Verse More Like This
between forefinger and thumb she
plucks it from the sky, and like
some great pearly gobstopper
rolls it over her tongue,
licks the dust from her
shuts her eyes
.i dream of drowning in. in Free Verse More Like This
lakes, belly up, a petal
shaped bruise of your thumb
on either wrist
i dream that what lays
in my bed is so much
more terrifying than what
lurks underneath it
.they greet me like old friends,. in Free Verse More Like This
ivory hands gripping my
shoulders a little too tight
to be forgiving
i tell them that i'm sorry,
and they know what i mean,
their smiles fade and the black
holes on their faces start to furrow
and i explain that it's not
quite time, not yet
i still haven't worked up the guts
to let them out
but they've heard this spiel before,
and it's getting harder to
silence the rattling, a myriad of
skulls and ribs that i can no longer
.i have loved. in Free Verse More Like This
i have danced
to the music of torture
i can forget the rest
.a lie. in Free Verse More Like This
the body in
.this is not what i want;. in Personal More Like This
the heart muscle pounding
and groaning, the bones
of the darkness collapsing
like scaffold on top of me
(i die, and then i come home)
.they say that you are the. in Free Verse More Like This
work of the devil; you'll have
black orbs for eyes and a tongue
as sharp as your fathers
and i hope you will not feel a thing
when they pull back your blankets
and carry you out, when they leave
me with nothing but creases
SolaceShe never slept well in the dark,Solace in Free Verse More Like This
not without the children of the sun and moon
to guide her weary lids home.
Guided by the aftermath, she was always two steps behind.
What did the world look like to the girl who had been through it all?
Braved the heaviest of storms,
yet skipping over cracks in the pavement.
They said her eyes were the wisps of clouds before the storm.
To him they were reflections of pages overlooked.
She said it was like she lived the life of someone she had never met.
Laid out to dry, yesterdays news.
He knew her as the girl who was built to never collapse.
He wished he was too.
He loved her more than words could say, and yet her pain was such,
that at times, he feared she wouldn’t make it.
But on nights like these, even when it threatened to consume her,
he became convinced that somehow she would.
Bipedalclumsy and unsure,Bipedal in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
you stumble your way into
Coming up For AirTired hands coverComing up For Air in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
a face matted with sweat and
tears from decades lost.
Mother EarthThe arc of her spineMother Earth in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
mimicked the gentle slopes of
the distant mountains.
Life on DisplayShe had grown up in a worldLife on Display in Free Verse More Like This
of coupon clippings, muffled ears
and tip toeing around broken glass.
Bruised feelings towards the world
that looked so narrow and thin;
Felt like a resolutely locked door.
Always grasping for the heavens
with a desire and ferocity
of piercing iron claws.
Dominating the skies with all the
bulk and majesty of a bird of prey.
Boxed in at one corner of a city;
dusty and forgotten.
Yet, always guaranteed to be visible
at night. Raging quietly through
the darkness like the last bit of embers
on the end of her stamped cigarette butt.
Artsy and upscale enclaves beckoned her.
Hidden oases of roasting coffee, hip music
and fresh-cut flowers. So unlike the barren
desert of chain convenience stores and dreary
apartment blocks she called home.
Beautiful young women
clink marble china together, bobbling
around each other like planets bobbling
around the sun; All struggling for recognition
and permanence. All the while, defiantly staring
into the face of the force that ga
After You're GoneEyes towards the skyAfter You're Gone in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
I swear you are watching back,
ever so distant.
At The SeamsShe believed in miracles andAt The Seams in Free Verse More Like This
beautiful things; happy endings
and love at first sight. The unknown
terrified her and the lonely beckoned.
She wanted to see the world as a place
of peace, where everyone lived the life
they sought out and everything
went according to plan. Rose buds
bloomed where they should and casualties
never happened where they shouldn't.
She lived for the day and
danced among the stars at night.
But the glimmer and shine of all things
will come to rust, as all things do.
Her stars will one day fall from their perch
onto unsuspecting dreamers below.
Reality smothers all she holds precious
until she has to come up for air, never
realizing she was even holding
her breath in the first place.
The truth of it all will come to hurt;
it has to. Because everyone will fall apart.
CradleAnd like a flowerCradle in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
emerging from its seed, it’s
now your time to shine.
In RemembranceA day to witherIn Remembrance in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
No cards, hugs, blooming flowers
A day to miss you