criss-crossed veins for the trigger girliii.criss-crossed veins for the trigger girl in Free Verse More Like This
"you're not okay."
"no, you're lying. i can tell. everyone has a trigger."
she's walking around in circles
and trying to pick up her broken pieces, but they're
not fitting like they used to,
something's damaged beyond repair.
"Why are you doing this to yourself?"
"because i've forgotten what it feels like to heal."
she regrets not cutting deeper, when she sees the life
still running through her veins, and her parents asleep
on the hospital chairs.
she comes to school the next day with a bandaged hand
and blue eyes that seem a bit dimmer.
"i broke a mirror."
her cracks speak louder than her words.
she slams her locker door and almost hits the boy walking past
and if this was a movie, she thinks, they'd fall in love
but this is real life, and she is too damaged to even
she's too broken and he's too oblivious
and it's too goddamn late, no matter how pretty h
count to infinity before you sleep.cause i knowcount to infinity before you sleep. in Free Verse More Like This
there are days when
it's painful to even breathe,
your throat closing up on the knowledge
that you don't know
how much longer you'll be waiting on this
band-aided, superglued planet.
every cell in your body vying to be the next to die,
and all you have to tell them is
maybe. maybe next time.
those are the days you spend
cutting rose thorns into your palms
and clenching your fists tight around
jagged reflections and prismed rainbows.
the days you realize
we're losing so much faster than we're learning.
we're maturing faster than we're growing.
adults stuck in the bodies of kids,
moving around, making the mistakes
no one ever wants to look back on.
those are the days you realize
it's not worth living here anymore.
you're using too many burnt-like sugar words
to get what you want, a mistaken human in wolf's clothing.
your lies are becoming louder than your screams,
but if the knife fits wear it on your skin.
this is the age where you feel caught between
fast-forward through the goodbyesthis is the beginning of the endfast-forward through the goodbyes in Free Verse More Like This
“i know you,” he says.
and he looks defeated, he looks sad, he looks like
he's a boy who may one day realize how much
he cares for you, so you cut him off and say,
“minus all the secrets i don’t tell anyone.”
“well, yeah, minus those.”
“then you don’t know me at all.”
and then you tell him,
i love you. but you don’t use those words
because those are taboo. are jinxed.
are knock on wood three times fast.
instead you press him in a hug and say,
i’m sorry, knowing he won’t understand
that this is the first time you ever cared for something
enough to try and fix it after you hurt it.
you hope he doesn’t ever realize what you’re saying
and his response will always be ‘what for?’ because
if he figures out he loves you nothing changes.
he’s just going to be in love with a corpse, a memory,
a pair of trigger happy hands,
not all humans go to heavencock itnot all humans go to heaven in Free Verse More Like This
april 23 2008
“bye mom. i love you so much, i swear
i’ll be home soon.”
“please, you’re only eighteen, you have your
whole life ahead of you, please
don’t throw it away.”
“i’m going, mom. i’m going overseas
but i swear i’ll be back before you
miss me. love you!”
most nights he shakes himself awake
with the vision of bombs and fire and bullets
still imprinted on his eyelids.
he doesn’t know what to call them.
the dreams, i mean.
what do you call bad dreams when
you’ve already lived the nightmare?
his therapist says his problem
is he thinks he’s not normal, that he doesn’t fit,
that he’s a special kind of monster.
she tells him that the key is figuring out the ways
that he’s the same.
so when he’s alone, or worried or stressed
or tired or hurt or wishing he were dead,
he traces over his collarbone and says
tear the skeleton from his comfortzonei want to build a skyscraper, seventeen stories hightear the skeleton from his comfortzone in Free Verse More Like This
and fill each floor with a story from the people who never said goodbye.
a middle child, born in 1994,
she always wanted to be loved the most
until she learned how to give a blowjob
in an alley behind Miss China’s Takeaway
at knife point.
she lost her childhood
to an ocean who always thought it was small
and never stopped pushing its borders.
he’s not sure how he’s supposed to live without her.
staring at the closed coffin, he loses the ability to want to.
it’s not fair, she thinks,
that the house creaks when she’s trying to sleep,
but when he leaves, it doesn’t make a sound.
nine months and a small coffin later,
she thinks she likes the name “amber”
“tomorrow,” he says as she passes him in the hallway—
him from math, her to english. “i’ll tell her tomorrow,”
a thought he had had for the
The Problem with Self InsertsThe Problem with Self InsertsThe Problem with Self Inserts in Reviews & Guides More Like This
There is nothing wrong with inserting yourself into a story. Like anything, it can be well done or... not so well done. The fact is, the majority of people who tend to write about self inserts happen to be beginners. Naturally, that causes there to be a pattern of certain, specific mistakes that are frequently found whilst reading anything on the internet. The purpose of this deviation isn't to say that self inserts are bad. I'm simply going to point out the most common mistakes that we usually encounter.
1. Making ourselves better than we really are.
Don't be fooled by the word "better." This can be replaced with mysterious, deep, dark, tragic, romantic, lovable... anything we want. Maybe a mix of a few of those things. The point is, the version of ourselves will be biased.
2. Not making anything bad happen to yourself
Let's talk about the word "bad." Does this mean something, perhaps, like... getting a disease? No. It means anything that interferes with
The Problems With Stories Written by TeenagersDon't be offended at the title. "Teenagers" is just my way of saying "people who write unprofessional/shallow stories." Not all teenagers write shallow stories, it just sounds catchier.... Anyway.The Problems With Stories Written by Teenagers in Reviews & Guides More Like This
The first thing I want to make clear is: I'm not talking about anything mechanical in this deviation. Grammar/spelling is important (obviously), but that point has been beaten to death by people on the internet already. My purpose, as always, is to talk about the stories themselves, regardless of the way they are communicated. Whether it be through written word or on-the-spot narration, I believe there are certain tricks to telling good stories. Not rules, mind you. Tricks.
I don't believe that telling good stories is about what you "should" do, rather than what you shouldn't. Example: people generally hate Mary Sues, right? Well, sometimes I notice things that are "like" Mary Sues, in the sense that they're equally as shallow/unprofessional ways of telling stories. The purpose of this deviat
Is she Mary Sue? Clarifying Mary SueIs she Mary Sue? in Free Verse More Like This
So, I realize that everyone has heard of Mary Sue characters, but the thing that bothers me is that Mary has never really been as clarified as she could be. Girls go around crying Mary Sue at every character with long pink hair, then go and create even worse Mary Sue characters in the false illusion that they're making nonMary Sue characters (or even anti-Sues) when in fact they're doing the opposite. Allow me to explain how this seems to happen.
First of all the term "Mary Sue" desperately needs to be clarified to these people, so this brings us to the very important question: What IS a Mary Sue?
At least everyone can agree on one thing. Mary Sues are characters that are so perfect it's annoying.
But. What do they mean by perfect? Everyone has different ideas of that, naturally. Unfortunately, this is how many fanfiction (and other) writers make their biggest mistakes.
When you hear the name Mary Sue what pops up in your mind? A be
How Not to Tell a StoryAfter being on DeviantArt for a few years now, I've noticed patterns in people's stories. Patterns, that I can't say I've ever seen until I started using the internet. I believe that's because these kind of patterns are thoroughly unprofessional. The pattern in short is this:How Not to Tell a Story in Reviews & Guides More Like This
Character = victim
Plot = bad things happening to said victim
Maybe this sounds harsh. It's not if you understand that is ALL there is to these stories. They take any character, hurl them into a tragedy and that's it.
Let's get this straight: We do not know your character well enough to care about them yet. No matter how bloody and gutty their injuries are, no matter how many of their family members are deceased, no matter what their boyfriend did to them, no matter what kind of disease they have, WE. DO. NOT. CARE!!!!!
These kind of things are sad in themselves, but WHO is this person we're supposed to feel so horrible for? Establish THAT. It should be your absolute FIRST priority: no exceptions.
No more pasting
Gablade Despair: The IntroGablade Despair: The Intro in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
A chilling wind swept through the long black hair of a sleeping teenage girl. The cold sensation hitting the youth’s face awoke her. She rubbed her eyes and looked around, trying to gain bearings of where she had dozed off for the time being. However, upon further inspection of the room she was in, something certainly didn’t feel right. She was in a bedroom, but it wasn’t her’s.
The drowsy eyes of the girl couldn’t recognize a single feature within the walls of this room. Of course, this did feel like a bedroom. She had been sleeping on a rather comfortable bed, perhaps Temperpedic. There was an open dresser to her right, filled to the brim with clothes that not only would she wear, but they fit her perfectly. Common sense claims that they were her clothes, but nothing was certain yet. With a flick of a lamp on a side table, the entire room became illuminated, revealing the true mystery behind what was going on here. Everything in this room was pain
Grubble Gum (Chowder Review)I'll be the first to admit that I grew up in an era of bad television. I mean, when I truly started trying to get into TV, Cartoon Network was primarily airing Johnny Test. This will probably explain my love for Total Drama, since it was a beacon of light amidst the world of dark on my favorite broadcasting network, in case you were wondering. However, there were a few shows I remember from back in the day that have stuck around and become really memorable for me, one of them being Chowder. Chowder was a heavily comedy based show with characters all based around food, from the main characters either cooking or selling food, to their names literally being food related. The other major gag is in how the world works. The food in this show is actually sentient in most episodes, or at least are alive and like normal beings. The other gag is that the world of Chowder is incredibly out of the ordinary, with animals of all varieties inhabiting it. Basically, it's like Pokemon Mystery DunGrubble Gum (Chowder Review) in Reviews & Guides More Like This
Legends of Luxury: Kingdom Reference SheetBeing as it is, many people wanted to know more information on the empires themselves, and how the world is laid out. Unfortunately, I have neither the time or ability to create a fully fledged map with the empire's boundaries, or at least a good one at that. However, I will do my best with this sheet to explain the extents of specific nations and kingdoms. It should be noted that when I tried putting this all together, the boundaries of the kingdoms were created with the legendary Pokemon in mind, and only those existing during this period were allowed a section of land in the downfall of Arceus. Hoopa, though an existing legendary now, was not existing during the time of this creation period. All legendaries up to Diance should be within the story though. If I missed any, feel free to correct me. Now, onward with the kingdoms!Legends of Luxury: Kingdom Reference Sheet in Reviews & Guides More Like This
The Eonic Empire:
The Eonic Empire was one of the most peaceful of the fallout of Arceus, hosting siblings Latios and Latias as it's king and queen. How
Rotund Mistress of the Red Moon 2The ballroom was slowly showing signs of life, as a few humans and youkai who recieved word of Remilia's party began to congregate within the spacious room. The fairy maids greeted the guests and told of how the party will be starting as soon as the mistress makes her entrance. Naturally, many were unaware as to why this party was even being thrown or what it is Remilia was celebrating. But, most seemed to come anyhow to sate their curiosity and, maybe, get in on the free food. Among this steadily swelling crowd were the more well known residents of Gensokyo, more present for the same reasons everyone else was. The only difference seeming to be in Aya and Hatate who appeared to only be around to document what the vampire was going to say and publish it in their respective newspapers.Rotund Mistress of the Red Moon 2 in Humor More Like This
"Huh, s'been a while since we last seen a party at this place." Marisa noted, shifting her black and white evening gown in a sense of discomfort. The fancy gown clung to her figure almost like that of a se
Rotund Mistress of the Red Moon 1The setting sun marked the end of an otherwise, average day in the realm of Gensokyo. The diurnal creatures of this fantasy world returned to their homes and prepared to fall into the relaxing abyss of sleep and dream of what the days of the future would hold. For others, the sun leaving the sky and giving the moon a chance to take over was the trigger for their biological alarm clocks. Indeed, the night's coming was the signal for the creatures of the dark to come crawling out and assume the dominant role of roaming the lands as they please. Among them in Gensokyo was a well known vampiress that everyone knew as Remilia Scarlet, the aristocratic devil taking up residence in the finest of western mansions in all of Gensokyo (if at all, the ONLY western styled mansion).Rotund Mistress of the Red Moon 1 in Humor More Like This
Nocturnal by nature of her species, Remilia was only known to be active during the night, the entire mansion itself seeming to bend to her will as even the functions of the many servants of the scarlet manor only peeked
Haganai: I don't get any exerciseGlorious and dazzling, the sun shone down from a cloudless sky, a beautiful day for countless young people to make precious memories with their friends.Haganai: I don't get any exercise in General Fiction More Like This
In contrast, inside the school building, the friendless loners of the “Neighbour’s Club” sat in silence. The arrogant beauty with long raven black hair, Yozora, sat at the table intently reading a complex novel. A delightful scent of fresh tea filled the room, as the incredibly androgynous maid, Yukimura, prepared drinks for the rest of the club. Rikka, the perverted scientist girl, was apparently working hard on some new disastrous project in her lab. Kodaka, the sole male member with dirty blonde hair, had left moments earlier to chase down the two bickering children that also enjoyed using the room, Kobato and Maria. It was almost a perfectly peaceful day to read and relax, but Yozora’s purple eyes couldn’t help but stray over to the television in the room. There, her hated rival sat knelt on the floor
GodYou murdered two childrenGod in Free Verse More Like This
with your bare hands
and thanked God
that He saved you
from getting the death penalty,
bloody hands and all
I saved two children
from a burning fire
and hate the God
I no longer believe in
for burning my skin,
and with it my faith
It seems God
works in mysterious ways,
he doesn't work at all.
50 Signs of the Apocalypse1. A man burns down New York City trying to microwave Canned Bread.50 Signs of the Apocalypse in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
2. Alaska passes a law enforcing a mandatory bikini dress code for all persons outdoors.
3. Texas becomes its own Republic (again) and invades Oklahoma.
4. North and South finally settle their differences and become one big Dakota.
5. A Mary-Sue becomes an International Best-Selling Author.
6. The Government hires zombies and trains them to eat vegans.
7. North Korea has a Nuclear Misfire and blows itself to kingdom come.
8. A private detective reveals a clan of lethargic, overweight ninjas.
9. The Earth's core spontaneously turns into fondue.
10. Violent Riots of angry Pacifists strike major streets across the nation.
11. The USA suddenly turns to Soviet-Dictatorship rule by Evil Robots.
12. Artificial Intelligence becomes a reality, soon followed by Artificial Stupidity (think GIR from I