Love AgainHear my worries, fear my criesLove Again in Free Verse More Like This
Dread the whispered lullabies
Drown beneath the spinning skies
Feel the truth you can't deny
Taste the blood upon your tongue
Feel the poison fill your lungs
I am she who lies among
Those who know where things belong
Feel the weapons kiss your skin
Listen to the screeching wind
See my power, watch me win…
And never fall in love again…
Does that make me Different?I wear make up. Does that make me fake?Does that make me Different? in Free Verse More Like This
I cry. Does that make me emo?
I have male friends. Does that make me slutty?
I smile a lot. Does that make me weird?
I laugh loud. Does that make me preppy?
I have anxiety. Does that make me a freak?
I have Bipolar Disorder. Does that make me abnormal?
I respect people. I change for me, and only me. I have a past, but I know I have a future.
Does that make me different?
But at least it makes me
I tried.I tried.I tried. in Free Verse More Like This
I tried to save you,
But you kept falling.
You wanted to crash.
But I tried.
I tried to protect you
But you kept escaping the shelter.
You wanted the disaster.
But I tried.
I tried to keep us together.
But you kept running.
You wanted to leave me.
But I tried.
I tried to do everything to please you.
But you didn't accept it.
You didn't notice it.
You didn't appreciate it.
You didn't love me for it.
You didn't even care.
You wanted it your way, more than you wanted me.
But I tried.
You'll Never Understand...You'll never understand...You'll Never Understand... in Free Verse More Like This
But I'm glad you don't.
Because that would mean
You'd have to go through my pain.
And I'd never wish that
Sometimes, when I'm sadSometimes, when I'm sadSometimes, when I'm sad in Free Verse More Like This
I remember that one time,
All I had to worry about was
If the bubbles I had blown, were about to
Sometimes, when I'm sad
I remember that one time,
I began to worry about the day that
My childhood would simply
Sometimes, when I'm sad
I remember that some day,
When I'm sitting with my husband
In the old old house... my days will simply
And that day,
The day when my heartbeat is
The day when my breath
Truly gets taken away.
That's the day
When my worries, my concerns, my fears...
Can't you hear the voices?Can't you hear the voices? in Free Verse More Like This
Can't you hear the voices?
As they ring inside my head
Can't you see the faces?
Painted in the blood so red
Can't you taste the poison?
As it rests upon your tongue
Can't you hear the voices?
Then you do not belong.
One special personEveryone leaves you.One special person in Free Verse More Like This
Everyone gives up.
Everyone stops loving you, and stops believing in you, and stops caring about you.
Everyone will say something to hurt you.
Everyone will eventually agree with you when you say “I feel worthless”.
And everyone will eventually say something about you.
And everyone will hurt you intentionally.
Everyone leaves you.
And everyone gives up.
But one person, one special person
Will never leave you.
Will never give up on you.
Will never stop loving you, and never stop believing in you, and never stop caring about you.
Never say anything to hurt you.
Never let you say “I feel worthless”, because with them, you won’t.
Never say or listen to anything bad about you.
And never hurt you.
Never leave you.
GravityI promise I’m not like everybody else.Gravity in Free Verse More Like This
I’m not here to
I’m not here to
I’m here to
I’m here to
I’m here to
Please don’t say I’m like everybody else.
Because I’m not here to
But sometimes, gravity is
Sometimes you’re going to
But I promise, even if I’m not there…
I’ll still be there, for you.
In My MindI like to talk to my best friendsIn My Mind in Free Verse More Like This
Whenever i'm feeling down.
A precious lick of happiness
From their sweet and lovely sound.
I cry the tears of melancholy
Upon their reliable shoulders
A kiss among my scars
As the night grows colder.
A feeling of pure pulchritude
As our friendship does prove true
Yes, i confide in my best friend
If only you could hear them, too.
HeyHey.Hey in Free Verse More Like This
We're your friends
And we know you have asthma
And we think it's time you got over it.
Your cerebral palsy is stupid
Why don't you just suck it up
Other people have it worse than you.
You don't really have HIV
You just think you do
If you stop thinking about it, it'll go away.
We've been talking about it
And we think that you're faking your cancer
Stop trying to get attention.
You can't do any of that?
Then stop telling me to do the same about my depression.
Please?PleasePlease? in Free Verse More Like This
Will you talk to me,
And let me know I'm not invisible?
Will you hold my hand
And let me know I have a friend?
Will you hold me close
And let me know I'm wanted?
Will you kiss me
And let me know I'm loved?
Will you do these things
And let me feel alive?
I Am AliveI am alive.I Am Alive in Free Verse More Like This
Sometimes I wish I wasn't.
Why am I here?
Why do I exist?
I shouldn't be alive.
Sometimes I hate my parents.
Why did they make me?
Why was I born?
I am alive.
Sometimes I see the dead on the news.
Is it wrong that I envy them?
Why do they know peace, whilst I suffer?
I shouldn't be alive.
So the bullies remind me daily.
Why do they hate me?
Why do they hurt me?
I am alive.
Maybe I shouldn't be.
Would my family be able to make ends meet?
Would my family know less pain?
I shouldn't be alive.
With a gun in my hand.
With a noose around my neck
With a knife to my wrist.
But I am alive.
And I'll make the most of it.
And I grit my teeth.
And I scream to the heavens:
The Monster InsideThere is a monster in meThe Monster Inside in Free Verse More Like This
Deep within my mind
This monster grows day by day
Fed by those who are unkind
I desperately seal it away
Locked in a cage without a key.
Only the cage is made of glass
Fragile, brittle; it is easily freed.
When I'm told I'm not good enough,
Not smart enough, not fast enough,
Not tall enough, not strong enough.
When I'm told I'm too small
They are like stones thrown at the cage
Hitting and cracking the walls.
And the monster smiles, its grin savage.
As my cage weakens, it strengthens.
Finally the cage shatters
And the monster is unleashed
And I'm drowning in the sensation
In pain, as I lash out in anger.
In pleasure, as I hurt those who hurt me.
In horror, as I break bones and draw blood.
In sorrow, as I lose control.
This is the monster in me
This creature of violence and rage
There's a monster inside you too
How strong is your cage?
MasksI have many masksMasks in Free Verse More Like This
For different people
For different places
For different times
All constructed by fear
The fear of losing, of pain, of being known
One I wear for my friends
Who I cannot live without
I smile and laugh with them
But the smile is shallow, the laugh hollow
It is a mask, all a lie
One I wear for my family
Who worry endlessly for me
I do my best to ease their fears
But I'm just hiding the pain inside
It is a mask, all a lie
One I wear for my therapist
Who is paid to care for me
I tell her I'm better, everything's fine
But I've never felt worse in my life
It is a mask, all a lie.
When I'm alone the masks drop
And I tell myself they were needed
But it is a lie, don't you see?
It is a mask like any other
The one who must be fooled is me.
I Am An ArtistI am an artist.I Am An Artist in Free Verse More Like This
Some people insist I am not
But I am.
People say I do not draw
But I do.
People say I do not paint
But I do.
People say I do not construct things of beauty
But I do.
It is true that I do not hold a brush
It is true that I do not know different shades of blue
It is true that my work does not belong on walls or in museums.
But I am an artist all the same.
Words are my ink and paint
Paragraphs my brushstrokes
With these I create my art.
I draw a war
With little children crying
As their fathers are killed keeping them safe.
I draw a field
Where men hunt animals
Knowing that should they fail, they will go hungry.
I draw a moonlit boat
With forbidden lovers entwined
Their lips bruised from frantic kisses.
My words surround and enchant
And with them I paint pictures.
I am a writer.
I am an artist.
I WishI wishI Wish in Free Verse More Like This
One day, the past will leave me be.
Crawl back into the shadows
Release its hold on me.
One day, I can hold my head up high.
Ignoring the cruel remarks
That make me want to curl up and cry.
One day, the pain will fade.
The constant ache in both heart and body
So I won't always be afraid.
One day, everybody can get along.
Mom and Dad won't fight anymore
And everyone can feel like they belong.
One day, I won't want to die.
But there's so much suffering
Why should I even try?
But most of all
I wish for a friend
Someone who is caring.
Someone who is loyal.
Someone who is kind.
One day, I will have a friend.
Someone whom I can trust
Someone who won't pretend.
I Am Not AloneAll it takes is one kind wordI Am Not Alone in Free Verse More Like This
To brighten up my day.
All it takes is one small smile
To make the pain go away.
When I fell, you helped me up.
When I cried, you held me close.
When I hurt, you kissed it away.
When I choked, you gave me breath.
All it takes is one little hug
And all my troubles cease.
All it takes is one stray laugh
And this fog in my mind decreases.
When I burned, you put me out.
When I cut, you helped me heal.
When I died, you brought me back.
When I left, you made me stay.
You refused to let me hurt.
You refused to let me drown.
You refused to let me go.
And you let me know,
I am not alone.
You have a choice.Life. Full of laughter, full of smiles.You have a choice. in Free Verse More Like This
Full of love and happiness.
Life. Full of tears, full of bruises.
Choose a path. Ashes or rose petals?
Black or blue eyes.
Loud or soft cries.
Cherish the smiles.
Wipe away the tears.
Because life is too short, to be living in fear.
BrokenBroken.Broken in Free Verse More Like This
Broken hearts, broken promises
Broken eyes, broken souls
These are the traits ive come to known
I look in the mirror
and what do i see?
A broken person staring back at me.
ForbiddenI need youForbidden in Free Verse More Like This
But I cant have you
I want you
But youre forbidden
I love you
You love me
Im in love with you
But youre not in love with me too
(not) strongShe's so strong(not) strong in Free Verse More Like This
I don't know how she does it
She's been through so much
Yet she keeps standing tall
No I dont know how she gets through it all
She's so strong...
She cries at night
behind closed doors
feeling like shes just been stabbed with a sword
All this is hidden behind a smile
she doesnt wanna seem like she is just a child
She hides it so well
hides it with fake happiness
And just when she thinks she will break free
Her old friend pain comes back to decree
That it will be even more difficult
for her to be happy
she's so strong...
Days of usSay somethingDays of us in Free Verse More Like This
Cuz im giving up on you
Youre no longer the one i want
not the one I need
Youre no good for me
Even though it hurts
I must leave you
For this is the end
of the days of us
Nothing.You dont know how I feelNothing. in Free Verse More Like This
You dont understand my life
You dont want to know how I feel
You dont want to understand my life
Youre just supposed to KNOW.
Youre just supposed to UNDERSTAND.
That is what is supposed to happen
when you are in love
But you dont get it.
You sit there and tell me Im wrong.
Nothing I say is right.
Nothing I do is right.
Im just nothing.
WhyI guess I deserve itWhy in Free Verse More Like This
I got too attached
I should never have let open
My heart that has a latch
You ignore me now
Like I dont even exist
But something about you is so hard to resist
What did I do wrong?
Oh thats right Im clingy
Im sorry I thought
That wouldnt be so spooky
I dont deserve you I guess
Because I dont deserve much
Except for this hurt
that youre unable to touch
You.Ask for an apology? No i wouldnt dareYou. in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
Cuz even if you did apologize I know itd sound sheer
How dare you say i cant
Theres no way that imma let myself look bent
I wont let muself look weak
When you try and stop my speech
First amendment chick
ever heard of it?
You gave up, so how about you just shut up
I wont make the same mistakes you did
Im not a little kid
I refuse to be like you
always waiting for the other shoe (to drop)
so try and take me down
Im waiting for the sound
But in the end Ill be celebrating
and youll be suffocating
me.A little girl sits on a hard stool at her kitchen counter, just waiting for the knock at the door. She waits for a second, than a minute, than an hour. Then two hours have gone by, and there still has not been a hollow wooden knock at the door. I sat as this little girl, year after year for four years, waiting for daddy to come pick me up. Then one day, he just stopped coming. It took a while for the absolute agony to take its full effect on me, but once it did I vowed that he was no longer my father. I started to hate him and chose to love the real father figure in my life, who was my stepfather.me. in Emotional More Like This
Eight years later, that stepfather is gone. He had a new daughter, a new fiancé and an entirely new life. Once again I found myself as that little girl who I had thought I had left behind. That little girl inside me was hurt and she cried out all her tears for seconds that turned to minutes, minutes that turned to hours and then hours that turned to days. I sat and I thought about this
DieDie:Die in Free Verse More Like This
Such a simple word, spewed without thought.
"I wish you'd die, I wish you'd be killed."
But what if we actually gave meaning to those words?
Can you understand the emotion, the magnitude, the weight,
Of actually seeing the life of an individual depart?
Can you look them in the eyes, as they bleed into your hands;
Observing their final moments, as the light fades from their eyes?
Or are you simply a soft-hearted coward,
Sitting fat behind a computer, wishing death upon others?
To say that one is deserving of death,
Suggests that you are ready to kill.
And if indeed you are ready to kill,
Then you too must be prepared to die.
"Now please, stop those tears my good man, we've only removed three of your toes so far (^_^)"
-Chen Yuan Wen, 9th July 2013
DesperationI wonder how many days you've spent feeling lost.Desperation in Free Verse More Like This
Thinking that you're going somewhere.
Never actually getting anywhere.
You look at the same four walls over and over again.
You can paint them in different colours,
But you know they're still the same.
And you convince yourself that you're making progress,
Nothing's changed, but you're making progress.
Things are getting worse, but you're making progress.
And then you wake up and realise,
That shit has hit the fan...
Suddenly you're forced to do the things you couldn't,
The kind of things that you were never comfortable with.
And you find out you can do them.
You find out that the only reason you couldn't,
Was because you were afraid to try.
It's hard - trying to take that first step.
It's hard - trying to convince yourself to take that chance.
My FirstYour loving smile,My First in Free Verse More Like This
On luscious lips,
In shades of blue.
My only mistake,
When I stole your breath,
Was falling in love with you...
You've suffered enough...My dearest child, do not weep, for I am here to wipe your tears away. Come, let us be free of these blankets; let us walk from these dim halls.You've suffered enough... in Emotional More Like This
There lies what once was your body, fevered and eaten by disease. Your lips are cracked and bleeding, your arms are both thin and sallow. Do not fear them now, for they are long passed.
Come away now, for we must say your final goodbyes. Here to the mother and father that came to your bedside each day. Here to the brother, who shall honour your name. Do not be jealous of them, my dearest child. For you are simply moving ahead; you have not fallen behind.
“But why, why does it hurt so much?”
Why? Because the memories are still carried within you. Your attachments are still strong in this world. That which you didn’t achieve, that which you haven’t done. All of it is carried as chains upon your body and they will stop you from
We Poets Are Frustrated...We Poets Are Frustrated...We Poets Are Frustrated... in Free Verse More Like This
I am sure that you have all experienced this feeling:
A masterpiece eclipsed by the baying of a brat!
A raucous rhyme, so emotionally raw;
Shadowed by a child's melancholia...
Alone in the darkness, you lick your lips and growl.
Your anger, so evidently understandable; yet you forget your own abilities!
In despair, my dearest sibling, you have forgotten — yourself
Why fear an obstacle so easily overcome?
Why shred your works with such heavy tears?
Have you forgotten that we are the original craftsman?
Our tongues birthed as our chisels and axe!
We need only take these simple themes
And corrupt them with all our twisted fears...
This hatred inside of you, this bubble of frustration and anxiety —
Let it swell like a pus-filled abscess of anger!
And with your words unleash this vicarious plague!
Take the unblemished works that have scorned you,
And inject them with the very darkness of your soul!
Let bleeding lips,
Sit down, I want to tell you something!Sit down for a second,Sit down, I want to tell you something! in Free Verse More Like This
Because I want to tell you something.
I want to tell you and everybody else that walked over me.
That today, I have become something!
Just walk with me for a second,
I want to show you something.
You remember this; is it all falling into place?
Cause this is where you shut me down.
Now I didn't know what I was supposed to do;
Excuse me for being a loser, right?
I had to work up a lot of courage to ask you out.
But you didn't even look at anything beneath the surface.
So of course, you just flipped me off and walked away.
Because of you I went to the gym every single day.
Because of you I started lifting iron over my head.
And you know what it feels pretty damn good to be getting my pump.
Yeah, that's something that you did for me!
And now, over to my phone,
Let's call up Michael.
What up man?
You remember me?
Yeah, I'm the guy who could never fit in!
That kid who was
Run Little Rabbit, RunYou sit silently, painfully pondering, torn.Run Little Rabbit, Run in Free Verse More Like This
Wondering if your nightmares will stop.
You shake as you start awake,
Twisting beneath the covers, eyes flickering.
Panic seizes your heart, bile rising.
You hold it back, barely; panting.
You watch quietly as shadows dance.
Glad for your freedom from dreams.
You turn on your side, sighing,
Believing that your torment is over...
But that is when you realize,
As the ceiling sprouts blooded eyes
And as the walls crumble. That
Your terror has only just begun...
So run little rabbit, run away.
Or it won't be fun, this game we play...
-Siddhartha Chen, 29th May 2014
Secrets Should be SilentSecrets Should be Silent:Secrets Should be Silent in Free Verse More Like This
What is in the nature of a secret?
It is not to be known, nor to be seen.
It is that which we bury beneath layers of deceit.
Why then, do we bury poetry?
why then, do we bury prose?
Why secret that which is meant to be seen,
And showcase that which is meant to be secret?
Are the words of our soul less important,
Than mere phrases designed to seek attention?
Are the words that we carve from experience,
Taken as less than a general phrase of emotion?
...No, I would hope not.
For I do as any other might,
And my skeletons are kept under lock and key.
For a secret displayed remains secret no longer;
Merely a gossip's fancy.
-Chen Yuan Wen, 6th July 2013
Memories of WarMemories of War:Memories of War in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
What is this long-lost memory inside?
Where oceans turn; what have we left behind
With star-burned wings out above the sky.
The sleeping sons are lovingly left to lie...
A thousand tears you've cried for all,
Now its time for you to fall!
Will you open up the door,
To the future we ignore?
Are you simply lying broken,
From the memory awoken;
Are you simply living lies,
Bitter taste with ropes you tie...
And the world will soon forget.
Fill my heart with this regret?
For the victims written in stone.
Unspoken sin you now atone...
Yeah I've seen this world where we livin' in pain,
Wrap my body round with chain.
Now we both know we be broken;
Give this man his smokin' token.
Held up guns with both his hands;
Not a boy he's cause he's a man.
Order comes by a suit and hand.
Will you flee or will you stand?
This is a memory of our war,
Of all the things that we can't ignore.
And staying blind to the cries of pain...
Will lonely ashes be what remai
Love Beyond the WindowWhen I was young, I believed in fairy tales.Love Beyond the Window in Free Verse More Like This
I believed that if your heart willed it,
That love could overcome anything.
That one day, two lovers could always be together.
But those were simple lies I think...
After all, how does one reach across a window;
Reach across a screen...
To hold someone on the other side,
Before they slip through your fingers.
Like a lonely dance between air and water,
I can only stand on the surface of the lake,
And see her smiling on the other side.
Sometimes, I would draw pictures on the surface;
These thin useless arms of mine scrawling tiny doodles,
And she would smile and reply to each one:
Including a heart, for 'I love you'...
And each time I would feel,
As though I could soar through any distance,
As though I could run a hundred miles.
If only so I could see you;
If only because I missed you...
But enough I say...
Enough of this life
Suicide Is Not An OptionI find myself weaving the final stitchesSuicide Is Not An Option in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Of a noose I have been working on for a while
I swore I’d use it by the time it was complete
If me and my sanity hadn’t reconciled
Each thread representing a flawed emotion
Which tightly woven together makes up my life
If you’re the one to cut me down from the rafters
Love, patience and understanding must be your knife
I find myself with a gun in my right hand
With only one bullet left in the cold chamber
I hand the loaded pistol with safety off
Blindly in to the hands of a complete stranger
Does this represent me opening my heart
And risking a life of abject, dismal sorrow
This God given gift of love is worth the risk
And cupid’s bullets can pierce deeper than arrows
I find myself perched on the edge of a cliff
And at this point in time I am feeling unsure
If the wind that’s blowing me towards the verge
Is real or in fact just another metaphor
That is representing all of the worries
Which try to push me to the seas
Her Daily MasqueradeToday her parents ask how her day has beenHer Daily Masquerade in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
By now the answer has been well rehearsed
She insists to them that everything is fine
But the reality is the reverse
In fact she’s the antonym of the word ‘fine’
This is due to her creatively cursed mind
Steeped in a world of such simplicity
Yesterday friends asked how she has been coping
Waiting for their turn to talk, do they care?
They just see a happy, contented princess
Not a pensive, vacant, glazed over stare
In fact she’s the opposite of contented
Restless and at war with reality
Battling feelings of alienation
From unsupportive friends and family
Tomorrow strangers will ask her what is wrong
But in white lies she has become well versed
Knowing that the tar black pit of torrid truth
Will not dilute and only make things worse
She’s living the antonym of the word ‘truth’
But her lies are not designed to betray
Just to cover the cracks and to smother those
BlackI always wear the colour blackBlack in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
As it reflects my inner mood
Black is the absence of colour
Now I feel the absence of you
Black is my inert, withered heart
Immobilised since you’ve been gone
A vacuous hole of nothing
Lifeless, vapid and monochrome
Black is the frayed material
Of the grim reaper’s deathly cloak
So in the darkest evening sky
You would never see his approach
Black is the colour and the shade
Of the star speckled, moonlit sky
And the shadow which you once cast
In the early morning sunshine
Black is my weeping mascara
As down my face the tears will stream
From the little puddles of ink
My pupils nowhere to be seen
Black are those things I've gazed upon
With my sorrowful eyes shut tight
Even rainbows become polluted
Within the filth of my mind’s eye
Black is how I’m feeling today
But should I not be feeling blue
Like my blood before you cut it red
Like your blood before I cut you
Black is t
Can Your Parents Relate?You, the girl in the corner of your bedroomCan Your Parents Relate? in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
That with each passing year since birth
Has had her confidence sold to those that stare
For so much less than it is worth
When it should be a priceless commodity
Especially to a doting dad
Is he not supposed to give to his child
All the things that he never had?
You, the girl in the corner of the classroom
That has forgotten how to smile
Are you tired of being told it’s just a phase
And you’ll snap out of it in a while?
It should be obvious that you are struggling
Especially to a loving mum
As she's already lived through those tearful days
That for you have yet to come
You, the girl hiding in the shadow you cast
Please accept your parent’s flaws
No matter what success or failure you taste
Do not let them be the cause
They created a life in love or in lust
Now nurturing has turned to neglect
A bird feeds her young till the day they can fly
So maybe now you should leave the nest
Target WeightI am afraid because I knowTarget Weight in Free Verse More Like This
That I will never arrive
At a point where I am nourished
And emotionally satisfied
So to regulate my mood
I consume levels that disgrace
They suppose that this is greed
That assumption is misplaced
I’m addicted to the feeling
The short term stimulation
But that only makes me more prone
To those feelings of deflation
And stomach cramps and pains
Loose skin hanging from my bones
Eyes sinking into my skull
And those deathly grey skin tones
Will I ever fill the hole
Silence those voices for a while
I prepare my gut for sorrow
While I am spoon fed on denial
But life’s too much to digest
An acid reflux episode
Regurgitate my memories
Before my stomach explodes
In a culture such as ours
The blame lays nowhere but my plate
I chose the fats, sugars and salts
The impossible target weight
Now I’m afraid because I know
The end has already arrived
In the form of this addiction
To a staple we need to survive
What Lovers DoWhen I was lost you found meWhat Lovers Do in Free Verse More Like This
So now you’re lost let me find you
Fall into my arms sweetheart
No questions, it’s what lovers do
Cradled in my arms tonight
Till the morning after ensues
Maybe then you can see things
From a different point of view
We can sit here all night babe
I’m no saint to offer guidance
Just some whispered words of love
I’ll be here when you break your silence
There is no doctrine of life
But only second hand wisdom
Each person is their own jailor
And inmate begging for freedom
Some of those are there by choice
Others will just misplace the key
You are indeed the latter
But please know you can rely on me
May this torrid time tick away
This is no requiem to our love
As I refuse to mourn the end
Of you, of me and of us
Repulsive By DesignLet me tell you this my friendRepulsive By Design in Free Verse More Like This
And I will tell you no more
If my passion is your crime
Then your love should be my law
I’m the exception to the rule
And the end of this blood line
I should hang my head in shame
I am repulsive by design
Allow me to elucidate
And I will tell you no lie
I am charged with being charmless
And I have no alibi
Feloniously you broke my heart
One chamber at a time
Though I’d expect nothing less
I am repulsive by design
Beware of the broken hearted
Indeed consider with caution
Repulsion cleansed my sorry soul
Such a spiritual abortion
But when a full term of sorrow
And low self esteem combine
I still remain unloveable
I am repulsive by design
Learn To Be StrongThis is normally the time when the tears comeLearn To Be Strong in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
When the words hurt and the bruises sting
But little did they know you have grown inside
Now you are immune to their bullying
The chances are that they may have suffered too
But this is no reason to be so vile
Now you’re twelve angry men finding them guilty
Of stealing your taut, tremulous smile
This is normally the time when you tremble
Huddle yourself up into a ball
But the only spherical shape they’ll be seeing
Is the flail as it maims and appals
The chances are that you will shatter their skull
And with that become as bad as them
Where were their morals when you were the victim?
You just want good old fashioned revenge
This is normally the time you’re rendered silent
But today you’ve at last found your voice
Now both weapon and word are lay beside you
You are no beast, you’ll make the right choice
And the chances are that when they’re confronted
The shamed predator will know they’ve done wrong
I Feel Your AbsenceWe will not be sharing a kiss tonightI Feel Your Absence in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
And no one else’s lips will ever do
Patience is a virtue, not a hindrance
It will be a pleasure waiting for you
Though I’m in love with your body and soul
And dream of a shared passion between us
I’ll wait to hear your body sing my name
There can indeed be innocence in lust
Alas, I cannot dance with you tonight
As we find ourselves many miles apart
But still you dance around my cluttered mind
Quickstep to the beat of my hollow heart
Though I’m in love with your past and present
I shall slowly remove the hurt and hate
Replacing it with a loving future
In accordance with my belief in fate
A pain that only you can imagine
To be apart, now that our love has grown
And arms feeling as empty as my soul
When I can’t cradle your quivering bones
Though I now wonder how I ever coped
In the days, months and years before you came
I feel lucky to have you in my life
So for this absence I cannot complain
I Was In A Bad PlaceI’ll indite my crude and clumsy rhymesI Was In A Bad Place in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
From my place in the pitch dark
And will wait all night if needs must
For that one creative spark
That will manifest thoughts in my mind
Into a charged lightning bolt
Strike my memories, open my wounds
And let writing be my salt
So cut me and see the metaphors
Floating around my blood stream
Pour salt on the literal lesions
To punctuate my primal scream
As painful at first as the memory
But after the initial sting
Wounds will heel, leaving only scars
Numbness replaces everything
This lack of feeling is temporary
As a writer I live for the pain
Of opening up new abrasions
To keep me lucid and sane
Deviant words in dank surroundings
Disturbed thoughts I can not waste
I apologise in retrospect
But I was in such a bad place
Completely.I am darkness personified.Completely. in Free Verse More Like This
An abyss so drenched in black
That it leaves me
My heart is a facade
It’s a useless beating lie
Because I've never felt a thing
Except for dead inside.
It’s a war I wage
Inside of my ribcage
That kills me a little more
I like to pretend too
That somewhere beneath the pain
There’s a way I can break through
But I already know…
Things will never be the same.
I lost absolutely everything
I can’t apologize enough
That I didn’t know who to be
When you said that you needed me
My scars are like chains
That keep me from falling apart
Missing Pieces.I am a missing piece. Something that someone needs.Missing Pieces. in Visual & Found Poetry More Like This
But at the same time, I feel so incomplete.
I’ve wandered way too far, wondered for far too long
Am I a missing piece? Or a piece that won’t belong?
Is it possible I’m damaged and not missing at all?
That I’m just as dysfunctional as everybody else?
Pretending to be perfect never softened a single fall.
But neither did admitting that you’re broken and flawed.
A broken missing piece. Is that all I’m meant to be?
There is no master plan that includes the likes of me.
Being all alone, it’s a hurt that will not cease.
A hundred thousand years from now
I’ll still be
Let Them In.With my back to the doorLet Them In. in Free Verse More Like This
I can’t help but fall to the floor
Out of breath, out of time
Out of sight, out of my mind
They’re tempting me; they lead astray
They mark my words; I am their prey
I can’t fight them anymore
So let them in and end this war
Leave me to my demons
Let them have at me
And strip me of my reasons
To ever be happy
I am broken enough
So that they fit in the cracks
I never wanted to be this
But now there’s no turning back
Let them take control
Because without you in my life
This is how a person like myself
Can ever become whole.
Wonder.Do you fear your own death?Wonder. in Free Verse More Like This
Is it hard to conceive?
Draw in your last breath, then-
Your last breath will leave.
Isn't it strange to think,
That there's a timer above your head?
A countdown you can't see,
That finishes when you're dead.
Don't you ever wonder,
What it'll be like when you're gone?
I bet the world will keep on spinning.
There will be another dawn.
But the harsh reality behind it-
We're all going to die.
There's no reason to try to fight it
Not even to question why.
It makes me wish that I could have a little more to give,
Because I'm not afraid of how I'll die...
I'm afraid of how I'll
Poets And Artists.I am self-destructive.Poets And Artists. in Free Verse More Like This
You are the affected.
I’m a thought that’s still in motion.
You’re an idea perfected.
I’m a sacrifice without you.
But with your life, I’m injected.
I’m a thousand puzzle pieces.
You’re the way to connect it.
Awareness.She writes such lovely poemsAwareness. in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
But nobody really cares
She hides them all the time
To avoid the judging stares
She wrote one yesterday
About a boy who said he loved her
But to her own dismay
She caught him with another
She wrote one about school
And the words painted on her locker
“No one likes you, stupid bitch.
You’re lucky I’m at soccer.”
She wrote about her parents
And how she wished they were together
But she knows that won’t ever happen
And forgetting’s probably better
Yes, she writes such lovely poems
But there’s so much more to this
See, her pencil is a razor
And the paper is her wrist.
Take It All Away.There’s a tear between each smile and a fracture on my heartTake It All Away. in Free Verse More Like This
And a thousand feelings breaking me and tearing me apart
Knowing when it’s over I may lose my sanity
Embrace the mess I am and the storm inside of me
In the dark I have a chance to fight away my problems
To ignore them all away instead of trying to solve them
All I saw when I looked back was a mass of insecurity
Laying waste to who I am and ripping at the seam
Lowering my already non-existent self-esteem
And I couldn’t help admitting I’m a self-made failure
Walking a broken path as a second-hand savior
And it all adds up to nothing; me in a nutshell
Yanking on the chain that tethers me to hell…
Heartless.Happiness is an emotion I was never meant to captureHeartless. in Free Verse More Like This
Every beat produces another microscopic fracture
And my heart is a toy because it’s played with and abused
Ripped up and torn apart thought it’s never even used
Tiny pieces falling, falling all the same
Losing all the meaning that was tattooed in my veins
Each fragment is calling, calling me by name
Sending shivers through my spine as I fight to break the chains
Showing me the mirror when I don’t know who to blame
Acceptance.Friends all stand in front of me...Acceptance. in Free Verse More Like This
Laughing, joking carelessly...
I hide my arms so they can't see...
What it is I've done to me...
And though I try to hang around...
They often leave me feeling lost...
What will it take just to be found?
How much more will my joy cost..?
('Cause I don't live, I just survive)
(Among the crowd, I'm ostracized)
(I can not be indemnified)
(I fell too hard, I broke this time)
My parents always yell at me...
Like I won't get it unless they scream...
But I never do know what they mean...
Why do they have to smother me?!
I've got my back pressed to the fences...
I'm sorry that I'm such a hinderance...
I long to feel some kind of presence...
Something more than this hated essence..
Suffered from my unjust sentence...
All I ask for from this world...
Is a little bit of pure acceptance...
ThinkYou say I`m cold.Think in Free Verse More Like This
You say I don`t want to be friends.
You say I keep to the shadows.
You say I don`t like people.
You say I`m weird.
I`m not cold, I`m shards of a person.
I`d love to be friends, but I`m scared.
I keep to the shadows to stay out of sight.
I like people but I can`t trust them.
Would you be warm if you`d been broken?
Would you be friendly if stabbed in the back?
Would you walk in light if darkness surrounded you?
Would you like people who made you want to die?
Would you be different?
Before you judge, make an effort to see.
Surfaces have depths, people have sadness beneath.
BeautyHer hair, a shining dark waterfall.Beauty in Free Verse More Like This
Her eyes, opalescent jewels.
Her skin, cream and roses.
Her body, graceful.
She is Beauty.
But she changes.
Her hair, fake and plastic.
Her eyes, you can`t see them under the makeup.
Her skin, smeared thickly with tan.
Her body, curves grotesquely accented.
She is your version of Beauty.
I Met MeToday I met a girl,I Met Me in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
and she asked, "How are you?"
"Just fine," I replied.
She said, "No, tell me what's true."
Perplexed, I stopped and stared.
She was young, no older than eight.
Her eyes were still innocent.
They knew no hate.
"What did you say?"
I asked in confusion.
"You know what I mean," she said.
This girl was in a delusion.
Trying to be kind,I replied,
"No I do not."
She frowned and replied,
"You lie quite a lot."
Now I was agitated.
What does this girl know?
Acting like she's so intelligent.
I'll just tell her to go.
"Let me explain!"
She exclaimed in haste.
"I know you're not alright.
I know you feel misplaced."
How in the world?
Who is this little girl?
"But I'm here to say you'll be alright.
Though your friends will leave,
leave you feeling alone and cold,
you'll find a reprieve."
"So just stay strong
because I know you can do it."
How? Who are you?
I wished she would quit.
Suddenly it was silent,
and I turned to see,
but there was no one there at al
Screamed NoYou said no,Screamed No in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
but he said yes.
How were you to know
what would happen next?
How could you know
that he'd push you down?
How could you know
you'd hit the ground?
How could you know
he'd rip off your shirt?
Tossed it away,
covered in dirt.
You didn't know
he'd have you pinned.
Because how could you know
that this would happen?
That your shirt would come off,
That your heart would falter
with the rhythm of his hips.
That you would scream no,
as he groaned yes.
My smileMy smile was once so easy,My smile in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
a thing of joy and pride,
but over these years of darkness,
the ease has slowly died.
I find it's no longer truth,
but simply a lying mask.
It hides away the misery,
the hauntings of my past.
I refuse to look at pictures.
I see what others ignore.
The uneasiness of my smile.
How it has turned into a chore.
Will I ever truly smile,
with joy, pride, and truth,
or will I never know a smile?
Will it die with the rest of my youth?
Please, i wish to laugh,
to smile without a care,
but I'm not good enough for this,
and I guess that is fair.
With YouHold me tight,With You in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Please don't go.
I'm falling apart,
falling down so low.
Like a rag doll I'm tearing,
seams falling apart.
I can't sew them back up,
wouldn't know where to start.
I need your help,
but I'm too scared to say,
too scared to reach out,
tell you to stay.
You're my only hope,
like it or not.
My chances are slim,
but I'll give it a shot.
So hold me up,
don't let me fall,
just tell me it's okay,
answer my call.
That's all you need to do,
and I'll be alright.
With you by my side,
I'll stand up and fight.
House of MirrorsThey say I spinHouse of Mirrors in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
a web of lies,
but webs are for spiders.
They catch their flies.
No, my lies are mirrors,
each a different reflection.
They fill up my house,
my sinful collection.
Sometimes I get lost.
There's so much confusion.
Which ones are real?
Which are illusions?
I try to back track,
but the mirrors turn me around.
I cry out for help,
but the mirrors block the sound.
I give up.
Hang another mirror.
In this one I'm cruel and cold
on the exterior.
How many reflections
will I become?
Which one is real?
Where have I gone?
Just a Dream. Please.I feel...Just a Dream. Please. in Free Verse More Like This
that this is a dream.
None of it's real.
Nothing's what it seems.
But sometimes I wake
with a gasp and a start.
Like being thrown in a lake,
the cold waking my heart.
And I look up in fear
at what I've done.
It's bringing me to tear,
this monster I've become.
The things I've said,
the people I've hurt.
I wish I were dead,
Six feet in the dirt.
This can't be real.
I won't let it be.
I don't want to feel.
I don't want to be me.
So I slip back into dreams,
where everything's okay.
Nothing's as it seems,
but I get through the day.
You didn't dare.She smiled,You didn't dare. in Concrete Poetry More Like This
but it was fake.
but she's about to break.
She reached out,
but no one came,
tried to fake it,
but the pain stayed the same.
This girl, she called to you,
but you didn't care.
Something told you to help,
but you didn't dare.
What would the others say?
The ones who called her a freak.
They may taunt or shun you,
so you choose not to speak.
Then she decides to leave.
Because no one wants her here.
You'll never see her cry.
She'll never shed another tear.
Her SideTomorrow she'll be gone,Her Side in Free Verse More Like This
but what can you say?
Nothing can help her.
The pain won't go away.
But she would've stopped,
you could've said no.
That's what she wanted,
someone to say don't go.
That someone wanted her,
or at least would try.
That someone would grieve
if she were to die.
But you just stared,
nodding your head,
and she realized the truth
with a feeling of dread.
No one wanted her.
No one cared.
Not even you,
with the the love you shared.
So she said good-bye,
and you watched her leave.
She may have had the rope,
but now you can't breathe.
Memories?How do you stay sane,Memories? in Concrete Poetry More Like This
when the screams echo in your ears?
This is not a game,
these are living fears.
I'm searching for the truth,
but find only confusion.
Was it a secret in my youth,
or just an illusion?
Did he really hit her,
or was it a dream?
It's all such a blur,
and things aren't always as they seem.
Should I ask them?
No, they'd never tell.
Was it enough to condemn?
Will he go to hell?
Did he really do it?
Do I even want to know?
Maybe I should quit,
let the memories go.
Ignorance is bliss,
that I know too well.
The memories, I dismiss.
Send them all to hell.
Pretty Blue PillsPretty blue pills,Pretty Blue Pills in Free Verse More Like This
shiny in my palm,
the ticket to my peace,
to my eternal calm.
They're so perfectly round,
and soon they'll be in me.
The closest to perfect
that I'll ever be.
They go down so smooth.
Five, ten, fifteen and twenty.
Soon I'll be gone.
Twenty-five and Thirty.
That should be enough,
but I'll play it safe.
Thirty-five and forty.
Now I have no more to take.
The bottle is empty,
as empty as I feel.
None of this is happening,
too good to be real.
But soon I start to drift
into a dark unknown fog.
Somewhere quite distantly.
I hear a muffled sob.
But I blow it off as fake.
Nobody could possibly care.
I doubt anyone's noticed
that I'm no longer there.
But then I hear my name,
just a distant call.
I feel myself lift higher.
No! I want to fall!
I ignore the voice in earnest,
but it's calling me up, up, up.
Please let me be.
That life was too tough.
I like this fog,
this numbing haze,
free from the ridicule,
from the judging gaze.
But inevitably I come up,
eyes open so slight.
after midnight.the nightmares dangleafter midnight. in Free Verse More Like This
in front of bruised and red-lined eyes,
taunts and hands that creep
under paper skin in dream-land
( the minutes trace
lines up the knobs of her
right up until they
reach the fur of hair
on her neck,
when her eyes fly open with
Nothing stays pure foreverThe waves crashed in a noisy remembrance of time:Nothing stays pure forever in Free Verse More Like This
seagulls screamed and
mermaids peered out from under
their safe home and
the smell of salt rode the wind like
it belonged there.
I am lost among the art of the breeze;
carried somewhere far away, like the land above
the clouds, haunted by angels and their purity.
There is someone crying,
perched up on the hill overlooking the sea and
sometimes, I think it may be me.
The earth is also crying for the lost souls
evermore, I am the misty ghost
above the spray of the waves, watching
newly formed families and
couples holding hands as they tread down the
sand that has never been good enough.
The sea holds the secrets of many,
especially those who entrust it with their
shells cut into the land, unbroken,
unbearably pretty, giving
life another beauty to admire.
There is a curtain over the horizon
draw it aside, little one, and watch the
over the lands, gracing it with a
presence that kept
tales under it
My Winter GirlShe had eyelashes of snow.My Winter Girl in Free Verse More Like This
I saw her as a winter girl, cold and sharp and sometimes unfeeling,
and she lasted like a tree in a blizzard:
laden down with ice and snow, crippled by the frost in her very bones,
her branches crack and splinter.
Every girl comes crashing down at some point
but she wore brokenness as if it were a cloak, shielding her from other
tragedies that may hunt her down and stab her
heart, leaving her frantically trying to scoop up the blood
and pour it back in.
you can't break someone who's already
Because you can think a million thoughts.There is a bite mark on my wrist,Because you can think a million thoughts. in Free Verse More Like This
smeared with red and purple,
teeth indents grinning at me
We are all the same,
at the very essence writers
stuck in words, artists stuck
in images, readers stuck in books.
Together, we destroy our
world by distracting ourselves
Tomorrow, I shall starve,
promising off food because I lust
over your soft layer in a way
that's more envy than want.
Other people deserve the
gift of food more
Tears are shed by millions
do you still feel alone?
I have a little belly
as if I have a child in there
and I think sometimes maybe my night-
mares are right after all.
I watch the pinkish-red tears of
bloodied water spiral down the
drain and stare at the gash in
feeling my desires settle down
20% of people in my country are depressed;
2% have eating disorders;
1 in 5 has some mental disorder.
42% of women have had a violent partner;
in one year, over 46,000 children were abused;
1 in 3 gir
you against mesplashes of blue explode likeyou against me in Free Verse More Like This
a torn sky
let's rip this grey-streaked
world to pieces with
(your hips are cotton,
collecting dirt stains
and thorns, my frozen fingers
indents on scarred skin
magnet to magnet
or mosquito to the call of blood on a summer's
your eyes, they're blank, glimmering like moonlight,
or picture-perfect frames,
of melted violence stuck to the pink gums
of your mouth the
seductive bow of cherry-red
how many times do you need to
tear them ragged?
above dusk-light's glare,
in constellations on our thighs, sunbursts
of crimson-red, a painter's
to describe the vivid
tragedy of a blood sunrise.
if the birds didn't chirp at early-morning syllables
from between chapped
swollen lips such as ours
how would we surface? the cupboard holds
too much temptation for our glass bones and
dead skin to fold
into lengthy arms and curved shoulders
broken eyes and emptiness1.broken eyes and emptiness in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
It is a Saturday when she feels herself slipping. For a couple of months now, she has been clinging to recovery with bloody fingers but today
She looks in the mirror and there is extra extra extra, rolls of disgusting fat over her stomach, her thighs, her arms, and she wonders where she's been to let herself go to disaster. The scales are dusty with not enough use and she steps on them, her paper skin bare for all the ghosts in the walls to see. Curly hair tumbles just past her shoulders. Blue veins stand out on her forearms.
The point of a red needle swivels to stab her eyes out and
she is 39
jumping off the cliff with a sigh from bloody fingers,
she is 39 kilograms of too much,
of substance someone can grab and grope and eat with sharpened teeth
she is 39, breathing pieces of glass in her vision.
I want to see my bones, she reads in slightly-scary poetry. And each time a trigger screams in her head, set off by the mere mention of rib bones
The Examinationa) This is a test:The Examination in Free Verse More Like This
now step back and take a breath and pretend you know the answers
because, hun, we're going to mark you wrong anyway;
dingdingding your time is up:
present your answers in the space provided, please
unicorns do exist, i swear,
and breaking bones bleed on the inside with tears
you're too sour to taste
wait, where was the question there anyway?
b) Onto round two, better luck this time, darling;
flaw-fullsometimes i wonderflaw-full in Free Verse More Like This
what it would be like if i cut the insides of my cheeks
out, like crescent moons, like hollow balloons, and
stitched the ripped seams together,
so the slimy jagged sides looking to the
greener grass on the other side of my teeth can
mend back into each other,
without the substance of my face;
and to be
a broken doll, strung up with strings, grinning
with cherry-stained lips,
the scars on the inside instead of glaring outwardly
oh, that would be
irreversibly and undeniably flawless.
through the glass of a time-turner you really have no idea how it isthrough the glass of a time-turner in Free Verse More Like This
to be another hourglass to knock over, to
remain something vile and used, so
i'll hope for your innocence all
over again. and he'll force
me down in my night-
falling like a
don't fall asleep,or they'll eat your ankles until you can see flesh and bone,don't fall asleep, in Free Verse More Like This
the tangy scent of blood heavy in the air, like salt and desire:
she barrelled through another day, screeching on tires that never had
any breaks, screaming obscenities while everyone's ears were bandaged up,
their eyes glued shut with obliviousness;
oh, she had lovely hands, she did, but they were covered in scars of pink and
brown and white, bristled with protection to hide the secrets
moonlight burns away at. someone tell her to hide
there's a monster on her heels, her ankles already bleeding with teeth marks,
circular and indented with
they shriek back at her when they unbutton their lips, perfect flesh moulded
into red instruments of destruction, but they always turn away, away, away,
blacked out windows, boarded up and birthed and named upon
bite your fingernails some more, honey, maybe this
time they'll bleed
and another day passed her by in a blur, ripping the brakes out of her