In a Little Girl's MindThere sits the girl with the things in her eyes
Monsters, destruction, and sweet butterflies
Hopscotch and daisies, surrounded by screams
Beautiful dresses now torn at the seams
Crayons and paintbrushes, villains and grins
Young, gladsome innocence, hatred and sins
Little red houses on roads left to fade
Gorgeous moonlight shining off of the blade
Blood pouring out as she cries her own name
Knowing she's forced to take each bit of blame
She could have stopped it and left it behind
All of these things in her troubled young mind
She could have saved them if she dared to try
Rather, though, she left herself there to die.
Now, others watch as she sits on the ground
Keeping their distance and letting her drown
In her own worries and things she won't tell
Waiting for her mind to kill her as well…
Tired, Exhausted, DrainedTired, Exhausted, Drained:Tired, Exhausted, Drained in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
I am bloody exhausted! Drained to the core of my soul.
I wake up every morning with bags; burning ever deeper into my eyes.
Sunken masses of flesh, reminding me that the dreamscape -
One in which I sought refuge; is now buried where it lies.
Yet still I force myself to trudge through this wilderness.
Forever caught in a moon drenched, delusory twilight.
An endless cycle of failure and renewed hope;
Giving rise to the very stubbornness that defines me.
-Chen Yuan Wen, 5th February 2013
The Flower of EvilThe Flower of Evil:The Flower of Evil in Free Verse More Like This
Evil is but a blooming flower,
It is born from a humble seed
And grows to corrupt a forest.
To watch its infection spread;
To be a part of its existence...
I can think of no better prospect,
Indeed one might baulk at the idea,
Of seeing millions suffer.
To watch worlds scream and writhe;
To see them suffer and die, with living eyes...
Yet there is a mysterious beauty in such devastation,
Fear that shakes me to my very core;
Is transfigured into a twisted pleasure:
As I am frightened, so too am I aroused.
I am addicted to the ephemeral sensation;
To the borderline between rapture and rupture.
To see my own blood soaking from splitting wounds;
Leaves me maddened amongst these blooming flowers
-Chen Yuan Wen, 1st May 2013
These Words Aren't PrettyThese Words Aren't Pretty:These Words Aren't Pretty in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
My verses are ugly and I admit to the fact
I can't use pretty language when I'm working with rap
Because the things that I write, are just the things that I feel
I ain't an Edgar Allan Poe or a Danielle Steel
And I'll be honest with you, I've got an envy inside
Because some poets got a flow that's as smooth as the tide
I read some stuff that they write, it's just so dope I ignite
Burning shame and my anger at the beautiful sight
And like birds of a feather, they're flocking together
These poets are the Gods and I'm nailed by the weather
But as the rain pours down, lightning resound;
I try to write pretty words but my lips remain bound
So deeply silenced by fear - the darkness I hear,
Afraid to be unloved by the ones I hold dear
I've hit the limit of time; my lyrical crime
These words that I've lived are just turning to grime.
So I wish I had their talent; just a sliver of that
If their skill was a mountain then I've broken my back
It's like t
Memories of WarMemories of War:Memories of War in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
What is this long-lost memory inside?
Where oceans turn; what have we left behind
With star-burned wings out above the sky.
The sleeping sons are lovingly left to lie...
A thousand tears you've cried for all,
Now its time for you to fall!
Will you open up the door,
To the future we ignore?
Are you simply lying broken,
From the memory awoken;
Are you simply living lies,
Bitter taste with ropes you tie...
And the world will soon forget.
Fill my heart with this regret?
For the victims written in stone.
Unspoken sin you now atone...
Yeah I've seen this world where we livin' in pain,
Wrap my body round with chain.
Now we both know we be broken;
Give this man his smokin' token.
Held up guns with both his hands;
Not a boy he's cause he's a man.
Order comes by a suit and hand.
Will you flee or will you stand?
This is a memory of our war,
Of all the things that we can't ignore.
And staying blind to the cries of pain...
Will lonely ashes be what remai
The Way We LiveThe Way We Live:The Way We Live in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
We all have our own little struggles;
Pushing on forward as the tragedies double.
A life led with pain and exhaustion too immense,
I'm pushing down walls as my muscles go tense.
But these are the words that you'll never hear me spit.
I'd never say I'm 'giving up' or if I should 'quit'.
I'm really freaking stupid so just tell it to my face,
And even then I'd never give up the right to race.
I'm like a lone arrow drawn and shot from a bow,
Blustered by the winds of all the things I don't know.
I'd never figure out if I'd reach the final mark,
But I know that I'd never lose my glowing inner spark.
And that's all it takes just to keep this body going.
With calloused hands in this ocean I'm still rowing
Searching for some land out amidst a sea of black;
A wandering gypsy bearing burdens on his back.
- Chen Yuan Wen, 14th January 2013
These Tears Would Come:These Tears Would Come:These Tears Would Come: in Free Verse More Like This
If my tears could tell a story of two -
What would they have to say about you?
Of a boy who spent his whole life seeking
And a girl who found it in the arms of another…
Would they tell us of laughter? Beneath a starlit sky,
Or of harsh words exchanged on bitter nights.
Would they speak of moments, so beautifully captured;
To be enjoyed in memory, like a perfect wine.
Or perhaps they would tell us of an untampered truth:
Of the lonely nights spent longing, for an Eden lost.
Captivated, habituated, to this lonely habit of you;
For her alone, these tears would come.
-Chen Yuan Wen, 31st march 2013
Poetic Practice - Love Like AshPoetic Practice - Love Like Ash:Poetic Practice - Love Like Ash in Free Verse More Like This
Yes sir, he is clinging to insanity.
He remembers all the things he said, profanity.
Bare the shame on his naked old humanity.
He is the doll claiming love for his vanity-
When he woke up, desire!
He made a move like fire.
His whispers; a liar,
His heart snaps, like wire!
But what are you thinking of this man as I make him out?
Is it an image or a type that you seem to tout.
was it all his fault with no one else to blame,
Or were there cracks in the story that they both will claim-
Spit that and live that,
Hate when you love that!
You rip that and tear that,
Scream like you know that!
Stop for a moment and just listen to this silent cry,
Time has stopped now for both of us to say goodbye.
Both turning on these clocks, living lies that have stopped;
And when the love turns to ash, let the gloves be dropped...
- Chen Yuan Wen, 17th January 2013
Painted SkinPainted Skin:Painted Skin in Free Verse More Like This
He smiles at you, as you enter the office;
Wearing eyeliner made of contempt and disdain.
His cheap cologne invades your nostrils immediately
And you quickly suppress a cough.
"Yes, yes, indeed we have to review this...er, many things are involved."
His face is powdered with a layer of self-importance;
Lips reddened by the polite harshness he spews.
His forked tongue flickers as he prattles on
And you're really getting quite tired.
"Oh I'm sorry! Of course, of course I understand; but my way is much better!"
You're getting really bored now, so you take a look around the room.
The expectation is to see it bedecked with acolades;
Yet bare walls, cold and empty, are all that greets you.
"Are you listening to me, I'm telling you why this isn't good enough. LISTEN TO ME!"
You take a look at the cup of coffee you were offered,
Cheap and lukewarm; you narrow your eyes.
"Is there a problem? I'm being honest, this is for YOUR OWN GOOD!"
Alone but AliveAlone but Alive:Alone but Alive in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
Oh here I am standing,
A lost soul is landing.
The coldest December,
Can you still remember?
Do you even hear me?
There's no one around me!
Oh shadow that I see,
The void right behind me.
Yet still I am breathing;
Yet still I am feeling.
The coldest sensation,
Oh worthless creation!
Are you still crying?
Oh why are you lying - abandoned and cold
Cold like what was left of soul,
Made of all the life you stole.
Walk divine but made of sin,
Worm of hatred squrim within.
Sin of lust and sin of pride,
Lash the tongue that last has lied.
Yours was silver with a promise,
Kiss of death and then you vomit.
Burning bile of ugly treason,
No one else can know the reason.
Left a soul behind to burn;
You are the reason I have turned...
On this cold and endless night...
When I'm finally pierced by the light...
And I awaken from this hell...
ALONE - BUT ALIVE!
Alive and again oh do I dare?
To give this heart and to lay it bare.
When heaven cast its fate
The PoetThe Poet:The Poet in Free Verse More Like This
He smiles as he sees her sleeping
& gently covers her with a blanket.
He goes to the window and looks out
watching snow fall, ever so slowly...
He sees people in the streets,
Chatting, walking. Some happy,
Others sad. Hearts beating,
Hearts broken; some warm, some cold.
He looks back at her, as she stirs in bed.
A yawn from her, brings another smile to him:
"How cute," he chuckles as he strokes her head.
He runs his fingers through her hair and is content.
Yet, even if he is happy here, again -
He is drawn to that window and finds himself
Staring out at the street and watching;
Marveling at the disparity and wondering -
Isn't there something that I can do?
Isn't there a better way for us all?
He looks back at her, sleeping peacefully;
He thinks about the future and sighs.
He wants a better world for her,
One where she would always be safe,
But unfortunately, he has no power.
He is just one man with little to his name.
He picks up a piece of paper, one found lyin
The Face At The DoorThe face at the door is a demon, a godThe Face At The Door in Free Verse More Like This
He smiles through stitches, his stare rather odd
The face at the door is a cruel, silent being
Yet, people are calm, and the children aren't fleeing
Quiet yourself, for you're the only one
Crying for help at the point of a gun
Learn how to fly, rather, learn how to fall,
The face at the door... well... there's no face at all.
I Love You, DaddyDaddy, please don't touch me.I Love You, Daddy in Free Verse More Like This
It doesn't feel good.
It makes me feel..
Daddy, please don't hit me.
I didn't mean to disappoint you.
When you hit me, it makes me feel...
Daddy, please don't hurt her.
Mommy didn't do anything.
When you hit her, it makes me feel..
Daddy, please don't say you love me.
I know you're lying.
When you say you still want me, it makes me feel...
Daddy, please stop screaming at her.
You already killed her.
When you scream at her, it makes me feel..
Daddy, stay there.
Let me sink the knife into your throat.
When you bleed, it makes me feel..
Daddy, aren't you happy now?
As you lie there, lifeless.
I'm only following your footsteps.
This makes me feel...
Daddy, please listen.
I know you can't hear me, but...
I still love you.
The same way you always loved me.
And it makes me feel...
It makes me feel..
Good Enough... for YOU.As I sit here cradling the blade in my handsGood Enough... for YOU. in Free Verse More Like This
Treasuring the moments I wish that I had
I can't stop growing more lost and confused
I can't stop thinking... am I good enough for you?
As I sit here, wrapping the rope around my neck
No one will understand a meaning so complex
I simply can't stop thinking about it somehow
Thinking, am I good enough for you now?
As I sit here, pulling the trigger on the gun
I think, maybe I was never meant for "the one"...
goes the bullet.
For when I think it through...
I really won't ever be good enough for you.
Words on the WallThe sun melted into the glamorous skyWords on the Wall in Free Verse More Like This
The moon stood there, hidden by sweet lullabies.
But mommy was crying, her day had been hard
The tears in her eyes twinkled just like the stars.
Her face wasn't happy like it should have been
And though she was saddened, she forcefully grinned.
I wanted to see Mommy smile through it all...
I painted a picture on her bedroom walls.
I told her to look, just to come in and see
But Mommy was angry... she wasn't happy.
She threw me down hard on the cold wooden floor
Then picked me up, slamming my head on the door.
She yelled and she screamed, then she hit me once more
She slapped me till I couldn't see anymore.
My heart then stopped beating, my laugh went unheard
Then Mommy got up without saying a word.
She looked at the walls splattered with my young blood
Then fell to the ground in her tears with a thud.
She looked at my face, then she looked all around
Then wrote on the walls with the first thing she found.
Then, after she finished, she wanted self h
Little Red HousesLittle red house on the corner left to fadeLittle Red Houses in Free Verse More Like This
Tire swing swaying above a sparkling blade
Silver gown, just for the hour
Starts out sweet then you taste the sour
A little girl's heart doesn't last for long
When a little girl gone right goes horribly wrong
One little fall means blood on the breeze
Little red house with a ghost to please.
Love AgainHear my worries, fear my criesLove Again in Free Verse More Like This
Dread the whispered lullabies
Drown beneath the spinning skies
Feel the truth you can't deny
Taste the blood upon your tongue
Feel the poison fill your lungs
I am she who lies among
Those who know where things belong
Feel the weapons kiss your skin
Listen to the screeching wind
See my power, watch me win…
And never fall in love again…
SchizophreniaShh.Schizophrenia in Free Verse More Like This
Look behind you.
"Are you okay?"
Shapes, forms, bodies, animals, plants
Shifting, moving, being
"What's wrong with you?"
You're a freak.
No one wants you.
You should kill yourself, let them out of their misery
Or we'll do the job for you.
"They're fake, you know."
No they're not.
"What are you doing?"
This is how I live.
Save me, from the monsters, the shadows
"What can I do?"
You can stop.
You can stop being ignorant
What Happened?I used to think make upWhat Happened? in Free Verse More Like This
Made people ugly.
Now I think I'm ugly without it.
I used to think people
Always loved me.
Now I think everyone hates me.
I used to think everybody
Was my best friend.
Now I think no one truly is.
I used to think
Boys were icky!
Now I wish I had one.
What happened to being
Bipolar DisorderI am a victim of a shadow named fourteenBipolar Disorder in Free Verse More Like This
And a little girl, my old best friend who turned into a demon.
Fourteen human figures without a face… they attack my soul
And everybody’s staring at me without an honest reason.
I am a victim of the people of the world
Who only want to hurt me, and my innocent family
Terrified of the ones around me, even those I love
When a nightmare becomes my reality.
I can’t take a shower without peeking outside the curtain
And I can’t close my eyes when I wash my hair
Because I’m horrified, afraid that when I open them
I’ll see somebody with a bloody face angrily standing there.
Sometimes I unlock the doors and then lock them again
And to be honest, I’m not completely sure why
And I can’t go upstairs at night, because what if there’s a fire?
I won’t be able to make it out in time.
I am a victim of a shadow named fourteen
And a little girl, my old best friend who turned into a demon.
And somehow, ou
I am Me. Who are You?I am thirteen years old.I am Me. Who are You? in Free Verse More Like This
I am not typical.
I am not average.
I am me.
I have been in two mental facilities.
Both times for thoughts of suicide.
I am not emo.
I am not a freak.
I am me.
My mother attempted suicide about six months ago.
My sister attempted suicide when i was eight.
But, I am not a victim.
I am not tortured.
I am me.
My father had a heart attack just over a week ago.
He was hospitalized for nine days.
He recently returned to the hospital for kidney problems.
I suffer from Bipolar Disorder with Psychotic Features.
I have hallucinations.
I have delusions.
But I am not a disorder.
I am not my difficulties.
I am not my troubles.
I am me.
she knows her paper cuts by name.Rose bloodshe knows her paper cuts by name. in Free Verse More Like This
on her tongue
reminds her of yesterday's.
A heart's hoarded secrets,
love me pretties, &
scarlet letter dreams.
do these boys know
of the bitter winter
like a blizzard
in her veins?
The sharp edges
or the crisscross
of origami limbs?
as deep &
as the ocean;
Please, forgive me.Like lies, you saidPlease, forgive me. in Free Verse More Like This
I make breathing the cosmos
through rose colored lungs
look easy- vertebrae stretched
toward the moon.
& I'm hanging my bones
out to dry, carving Saturn's
rings into my wrists- my
star burst ankles.
I swore then I'd keep my
black tongued poetry
& uprooted limbs far,
far away from you.
But, like lies, galaxies,
& night fevers, you
are the destination
on my star map skin.
A lion among sheep.There are ghosts in my bloodstreamA lion among sheep. in Free Verse More Like This
kissing concrete cells &
the bedroom eyes of nerve endings.
( foreign words
engraved into my marrow, birds in my chest
& wars not yet fought between my hips. )
I've taken myself apart every night
since I learned how to swallow a pen
limb by steady limb.
Passed around by grabby hands,
a sold, & borrowed daughter;
I am a lion among sheep,
drunk on life & ink.
Ways to conquer heartbreakDance with fistfuls of roses, shred their petals one by one and wear their thorns like armor.Ways to conquer heartbreak in Free Verse More Like This
Write your secrets between the folds of paper cranes and tuck them safely between the empty spaces of your castle ribs.
Open your broken heart to hummingbirds, allow them the warmth and shelter of your arms.
Rebel. Tape poetry to your limbs, Cummings and Sandburg and Sexton.
Take a walk outside of your skin for a while, run with wolves.
Extinguish that forest fire that’s been curling too long in your lungs.
Be that lionhearted girl those snobby poets always write about.
Allow that cavern of stars in your throat to speak your truths in uppercase letters, in free verse yet to be proofread.
Write about wars and victory.
Be the hero.
Milky Waymy body is a road mapMilky Way in Free Verse More Like This
of hazard signs
but on the days
when the mirror
is nice to me,
i can hear
like little racing
beneath my skin:
you are not worthless.
you are strong.
your ribcage has a meaning-
these bruises are
ste ti & you are the Milky Way.
I want to forget names,& faces,I want to forget names, in Free Verse More Like This
I want to forget their veins,
fingerprints forever burned into my eyelids;
wrists I can't look at
without longing to tear apart.
Spine full, and spiteful:
I want to cry
roses in my midnight tea
for these star collapsed lungs.
I want to cry for her
& for me.
she wont allow me the courtesy.
RelapseIt’s like countingRelapse in Free Verse More Like This
along your limbs -
remembering a time
‘just one more’
made you feel better.
- & you’re sitting there
Draco, stuck in limbo
always looks like he’s
Therapists, I don't like their taste.i.Therapists, I don't like their taste. in Free Verse More Like This
in 7th grade
i didn’t know depression
until she told me her name,
carving forever scratches
along my limbs like
little love notes on the bark
of a tree.
she stole my rings
and left me hollow.
i had only ever met anxiety
in passing, until one day
he handed me power and told me
to hurt someone else with it.
with an uncontrollable
quivering in my fingers,
he whispered, “ to survive,
you must learn quickly.”
as i shoved the bevel of a needle
into a strangers arm.
so, if a therapist
could talk away my scars
like iodine disinfects,
guide the ships
through the storm of my mind
like a lighthouse-
instead of pills,
if a therapist could
give me the strength
i might just
take my chances.
It's all about her,-I had never wished to know the moon,It's all about her, in Free Verse More Like This
or the burning gaze of her lover.
I am merely a forest of silences,
old dogwoods & untamed hair.
-But, I made a promise
to a bone collector once.
He could have my spine,
my kneecaps, &
one flowered rib,
wrapped & bowed-up
like a present
-if he could fall in love
with things that slip through his fingers:
-“It would be a sin to love you,
my dear sweet wolf;
you will always cry for the moon.”
FrostI am devouring chaos,Frost in Free Verse More Like This
chasing it down with winter's chill.
Spare me your fingerprints,
summer's lovechild. Those knowing owl eyes
have me second guessing the wild churning
in my bones. You are the sleep that sweeps
my eyelashes, drowning me in my own daydreams.
When was it...
that you plastered yourself to my ribcage?
Sleeping Souls Never Liethey buried youSleeping Souls Never Lie in Free Verse More Like This
with stars in your palms, because
they thought it was a crime
you'd never made a wish in your life
the dirt and darkness
was enough to extinguish
their dying lights
(it's okay, your silent skin
said, softly, I always wanted
the sky to bring me to sleep)
the priest begged, believing you
might rise from the hole
you'd dug for yourself
he wanted to let you know
there was something bigger than all of us,
someplace farther than 6 feet under
(I'm alright, your stony eyes
swore, sometimes falling
feels enough like flying)
their voices all filled with tears
even though you said you weren't worth
their worries, they wept for the future
you wouldn't get to live
(I wouldn't have lived it anyways,
they buried you
near the ocean, where the moon
always shone too bright
so you'd never again have to fear
any monsters of the night
they left flowers, photos, notes
and a little bit of themselves, too
when they finally left you
you believed it was right
Amnesiacsmaybe you forgot how toAmnesiacs in Free Verse More Like This
wake up without screaming.
she smiles like a broken dawn
and the meek will inherit the
earth, if they don't drown,
first. she's barely breathing;
trying to grow gills because
it's only in the state of dying
that we adapt.
and you won't see the colors
pouring out of her chest, you
won't hear the ebbing swansong
she hums so quietly.
you didn't come to be reminded.
you inject a little further, a little
closer to the heart. numb.
(she died the day she
was given a name)
she made you promise never
to be a number, or a majority;
she made your heart beat in a way
that made you think you were alive,
but you can't believe in anything
that lasts longer than a minute.
you shut down. fingers
close around an empty bottle,
a flaccid tongue writhes
and it tastes bitter.
she's too close, you can hear
her thoughts unwind, you can
taste her mistakes. it's too real.
you were never human, you
tell yourself so you can be
convinced it was never valid.
she's too close and
on how I need youtoday is a six-word story:on how I need you in Free Verse More Like This
I’m tired of waking up
I will peel back your
every insecurity and anxiety
and watch them fall to the floor
like vodka petals, regurgitated mosaics,
I will see you naked and
reborn and you will break apart
into passive aggressive poetic
dedications and unsent letters and
I will hate and love you
for the very same reasons and
I will move on.
unfilterediunfiltered in Free Verse More Like This
i’d tell you I hated you
if you had a voice or a face,
or any sense of tangibility aside
from the spider fingers you use
to crawl through my brain
you are not beautiful, like
all the other poets protest. you
are the red in my eye, like
a pen bled; the ragged to
my fingernails, the hitch of my breath
when it catches in my throat.
before i go, i’ll write a million letters (a million
pennies for my thoughts, bitter, embedded
under my tongue) and send them to people
i’ve never met, telling them how my eyes were blue
when i was little but now are the same gray
i’m choking on, how i am maddie and how that’s short
for a name i was never graceful enough for, how
i tell myself stories of lives i’ll never live so i
can go to sleep
because when i’m really gone, that’s all that’ll be left
(it’s funny what people
try to justify with words)
you never loved me,
you selfish thing, i wonder why
i wasted so many nights relivin
in which I become beautifulI drown my conscience inin which I become beautiful in Free Verse More Like This
the holy water of my wrists,
I carve hearts from empty
paper for my galaxyboy
with stars written in his skin,
and I swallow moths to
muffle the emptiness and
help me fly away.
CountedI am a number.Counted in Free Verse More Like This
twenty times I broke, fourteen times I lied, six pieces of my heart lent
goodbye, two times I didn't want to make it, one failure
and countless broken things;
infinite words abandoned trembling and lonely and cold.
I'm so cold and it's spring and the ground is alive to make up
for the mistakes I bury; the cherry blossoms are wilting
black, drooping so low to the ground that it is a blanket
as far as the eye can see:
fallen flowers die like starsick soldiers, begging please, oh,
please take me home so
I can leave on my own threshold and kiss the walls of
my own making and see my wife for a final time, please,
take me home where there are lullabies and nightlights
and bedside wishes; where the air isn't thick with the
scent of sinning men, oh god I'm sorry
that life is inevitability and the failure before me is as set
Curing Depression in Seven Easy Steps1. apologize profusely toCuring Depression in Seven Easy Steps in Free Verse More Like This
the ones you were honest with,
the ones who believe in you,
the ones who never cared,
the boy who thought you were
worth it, the girl who stayed up
all night to hear you breakdown,
the doctors, the nurses, the stars,
your scars, your little brother
who told you he hoped your sad
would go away, yourself
2. fall in love with someone
who doesn’t understand you.
write poems about his eyes being
a lighthouse, and his hands
being sirens. tell him he is
your happiness, he makes you
better. tell him his scars are
beautiful, he is so breathtakingly
beautiful that it’s reasonable
you should cry; love him
infinitely, love him like they say
you need to love yourself
3. eat away emotions
you didn’t realize you had. eat
when you’re sad, eat when
you’re bored, eat when he forgets
to call. eat when you think
you’re the only person alive
in a dead universe, eat when
you don’t remember when you
were last happy; pretend
the emptiness is
Growing Upit seems that by now I’ve been diagnosedGrowing Up in Free Verse More Like This
with a mild case of weightlessness, mindless
drifting past empty homes and the emptier people
that purchased them. I remember conversations
with you about existentialism
and the almost intricate fabric of my mind and
everything in between, and you-- the way you
paused before making a point as
the words defined themselves in your head:
I remember the day I told you I was God.
Creator of all things unimportant, trapped
in the body of a girl with nothing left to give, you
it must be a beautiful place
inside your head, with a world
that revolves around hope and expectations
the way it was supposed to; all
storybook-perfect like the
wars promise we’ll one day
[I’d like to think that every great leader
once cried themselves to sleep wondering
if they’d ever mean anything and
did things to stand out like smoking
or drinking or pretending to be someone
they’re not and every morning they’d tilt
Confessionsthere’s a lot I never told youConfessions in Free Verse More Like This
1. I have a habit of lying, about
the simple things (like, yes I
forgot to remember and I swear by
soul mates and I’m in love
with your susurrus voice
and no, I’m really doing fine).
It was not an act of infidelity because
I believed it, too.
2. I’m infatuated with the concept
that I am more or less fictional, the
delusive beauty a million men will
dedicate novels to: I am fragile,
a dust angel sent to save the world
from commonalities and
3. Since I’m not allowed
to remember your name
I will commemorate you
in acts of escapism,
killing off the pieces
of the person you left behind.
4. I believe in a past life
I was a bird with a tendency
towards tall buildings; the sorry kind
of bird with heavy bones and crumpled wings
who never quite learned
to fly away.
5. I miss you. I used to think
you were a person, but now I know
you’re the happiness I will never
6. I'm sorry.
I am the wayward childI wish I had something more to offerI am the wayward child in Free Verse More Like This
when your joints ached and your bones creaked
and you wept dust; (the cobwebs around
your tongue were a comfort once)
but I am three times screwed
over backwards and turned right around,
breathing in gravel and praying on
the only consistencies I know like
on Sun-day we are in the house of God
and it won’t rain and dad won’t speak
and mom will sit with pursed lips counting
all the times we didn’t kiss her goodbye
and everyone will call it normal,
everyone will look at the way I write words
on cracked pavement and get glassy-eyed
when they speak softly and forget the sound
of my own voice when I’m afraid; all those times I
tripped over my own feet and walked away
with wounded knees, and they will call me normal.
I’m at it again, building barricades
from ashes and calling them friends
(this here is fear, he visits me nightly;
and that stale stain in the corner
is actually anxiety, recuperating
from the moment it caught a
.you are dead and buried. in Free Verse More Like This
six feet under yourself,
still feeling the way you did
when you were seventeen
and when you bathe, you still
keep your head under the
water, wrists upturned, red
eyes open, trying to drown yourself
.sometimes. in Free Verse More Like This
in my head
curl up in
the beat of
.you're afraid. in Free Verse More Like This
to let anyone
stoke the fire
in your chest
you will burn
.pour love all. in Free Verse More Like This
over, then strike
the fire will
burn itself out,
but the ruins
.you’ve got. in Free Verse More Like This
.a scalpel from. in Free Verse More Like This
wrist to elbow-
you will not be
living under my
.horrors prey on. in Free Verse More Like This
dreams, and sleep can
do nothing about it
a lamb strays
from the flock;
a wolf grins
MaybeJust give me one dream that isn't see-through.Maybe in Free Verse More Like This
One substantiated claim to reality,
that I might hold onto life with.
Every quivering cell, mid-osmosis, begs you
for a shred of dignity with my tea.
Just one chance for something heavy,
something hard and room temperature. Real.
I don't want to look through my day dreams
and see someone else's face there.
I don't want to dream of those people
who may make, or break me, in the future tense.
I am tired of milky white and reflective black.
It is time for a life of colour and hope -
and not looking back to see if the past
matches up with the jigsaw map to the end game.
I want to be in the game, participating,
feeling, like I might make it there one day.
Just give me something, that I can hold onto;
something harder to see through than a whisper
of that voice in the back of my mind that says
Perfect on PaperWe cut heartsPerfect on Paper in Free Verse More Like This
into paper to make streams
That was my impression of it.
That you ripped
the pieces you didn't want
until you got something that was
It's no wonder
that I can't believe that someone
would think I was paper-perfect,
You'll Never DieHear me read it!You'll Never Die in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
They say that if a writer falls in love with you then you never really die.
Instead your body is laid out in its funerial shrouds and moulds are made. Soft impressions of you to be pressed onto the blank faces of future loves.
Every time I write of taking comfort in a safe place in a storm, it will be your forearm. Every half-made smile will be on your lips, and every touch will be constructed from the residue beneath your fingernails.
When I metaphise of trees' blood, the leaves that give the energy so that a willow can provide shade for those in need, it will be your blood, it will be your light drenched kisses.
Every tear on every face will taste of the sweat that you put into keeping me happy. Every soaring song of love will be played through your windpipe, your trachea my instrument of choice.
For every time that a hero has the strength to walk on, I will use your feet. I will weld them to my own and walk a mile. Wal
In absence of a poem.I chewed my pen to the nibIn absence of a poem. in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
and swallowed the ink thoughtlessly,
but no matter how long I thought,
I couldn't say what you mean to me.
I tried, I tried and I tested,
every word in my diminutive range,
but I screwed up more pieces of paper
and happened upon something strange;
I noticed words, which have served me,
for all of my formative years,
had no power to convey my gratitude
for the times that you dried my tears.
Whenever I doubt myself (often),
You're the one who tells me I'm wrong
You lift up my chin and remind me, wait
for the good things that will come along.
I can't find a way to express how
you are the saving grace in my head.
So words can't tell you how I love you -
I hope my silence will tell you instead.
The PlaylistA group of us lying on the floorThe Playlist in Free Verse More Like This
in a too-small apartment
that can’t hold a fraction of our disorders
syndromes and symptoms
tucked under the kitchen sink
and in between self help books
and in the pages of love poetry
only half meant.
A group of us lying on the floor
wishing we could see the stars.
but thats not how the architecture
has been set up for us
we have to live our lives blinkered
from the celestial
but at least we have each other.
A group of us lying on the floor
letting music replace our immune systems
not caring if a misspent lyric saves us,
not caring if a dropped note kills us
we don’t care about anything but the floor,
these walls, these chains,
that sound so familiar in an acoustic’s voice.
A group of us lying on the floor
caring about nothing but the ceiling
thats blocking out the light.
The GhostAlright, I'll bite.The Ghost in Free Verse More Like This
I'll squirm and fold myself over
as a swelling of dough
pats down into itself;
hunkering down for the night.
I know when to fold
and when to hold; so I'll wait.
Wait while you leave me
packing up the uncomfortable
furniture in my mind.
I'll bubble wrap my dreams
and hold my breath in storage
and leave myself hollow
with only the echo of us inside.
You have me on the hook
So it's alright to let me wriggle
and slip through the carrion;
the wrecked remains of
my maggotous life.
I can't help but drop my head,
lose my pride, wait for death.
Maybe heads will roll
onto happily waiting Guillotine
and depart me from my troubles.
Until then I remain
the pestilent, petulant skeleton
rapping its ivory against the door
- Let me out of your closet.
I don't want to be
a secret that you hide from yourself
in the royal tower in your head;
a delusion, or the girlfriend
of only one personality.
I don't want to drape my cerements here
and let them stick to your floor.
If I must die, le
Framed[ I met him at the county fair.Framed in Free Verse More Like This
It wasn't like the songs predicted;
I had mud up my shins and he
had grass in his hair. What a mess. ]
[ I kissed him at my grandma's house.
He swallowed me and digested me;
I became a part of his simmering self.
We fused together, and I died. ]
[ I married him in a triangular church,
When I turned up in white he grinned
and whispered "what, no muddy knees?".
I put a leaf from my bouquet in his hair. ]
[ He kissed her at my grandma's house.
She had left it to us when she passed.
In the house where I'd learned about love
he taught me all I know about betrayal. ]
[ He left me at the train station.
I'd helped him with his leather suitcase,
struggling to get a grip of the situation
I gave a habitual kiss goodbye. Awkward. ]
[ He met another girl in group therapy.
They had a mad, passionate affair for a year
then, it expired. Shortly after, she did too.
He came to me, life turning to sand. ]
[ I forgave him at my birthday party
surrounded by friends wh
CradlingI lay my swan heartCradling in Free Verse More Like This
in a nest of feather fluff;
sanguine, sweet and soft.
I lay my swan heart
in a frame not strong enough
to keep my love aloft.
I Didn't Mean, I Didn't MeanI didn't mean to make you cringeI Didn't Mean, I Didn't Mean in Free Verse More Like This
when I mentioned the strength of your shoulders
- didn't want to see them fold in
to protect vulnerable organs
from words protruding rudely
out of disguised compliments.
I didn't mean, I didn't mean -
I didn't mean for you to shut your eyes
when I admired the specific shade of chamoisee
- didn't want to see you wince
as you prepared for an unfelt slap
and the long-lasting sting
of a bare, misshapen insult.
I didn't mean, I didn't mean -
I didn't mean for you to laugh
when I said that I find you beautiful
- didn't want to see you shake
and hear your voice choke
on the ridiculousness
of a misspent commendation.
I didn't mean, I didn't mean -
I didn't mean for you to hiss a sharp inhale
when I smiled at the sound of your voice
I didn't mean, I didn't mean -
I didn't mean for you to frown
when I stared at you too long
I didn't mean, I didn'
with a whisperthis is how we rule the world,with a whisper in Free Verse More Like This
the forgotten, lobotom-ised,
of a long lost dystopast.
not with a SHOUT,
we do not argue.
we do not even unsheath
we whisper in your children's ears
the memories of what should have been.
the life we all crave.
the death we all crave.
WE do not discriminate
our opinions onto others
pressing the side of the blade
down onto the flesh
all are bitten
with the fever of our belief.
this is how we rule the world,
we tell stories,
we incite a generation
with their own scar/r/ed lungs
with a whisper.
Venomous: Part 8 (EnglandxReader)Venomous: Part 8Venomous: Part 8 (EnglandxReader) in Drama More Like This
“(F/n)!” you heard someone whisper through the fog of your sleep, “(F/n)!”
Blinking blearily, you opened your eyes to see Matthew. One hand was gently shaking your shoulder while the other held a tin plate of food. He seemed relieved to see you awake.
The quiet boy only said one word to you before slipping out of the storage room to the kitchen. “Eat.”
And you did. Greedily, you scooped the tasteless food of the pirates into your mouth, only wanting a break from the painful hunger of your stomach. When you finished the food, you felt worse then before, nauseous from the sudden weight in your stomach.
The door opened again and you flinched, but it was only Matthew again. He seemed nervous. “Look, I don’t know what happened, but Arthur’s frantic and starting to act a bit strange,” the boy’s voice trailed off a bit before picking up again, “I can’t hide you here anymore, I&
Venomous: Part 5 (EnglandxReader)Venomous: Part 5Venomous: Part 5 (EnglandxReader) in Drama More Like This
Waking up, you found yourself minus one green-eyed pirate captain. You stretched out contently on the bed before closing your eyes again, perfectly happy with sleeping the day away. Someone was out to destroy your happiness, though.
"Oi! Get out of my bed and get yourself decent. I can't have you laying about just because you're a girl." You didn't move. Neither did the captain. "You have your orders!" he said in a menacing tone, causing you to peek open an eye and see the wide grin on his face. With a certain shine in his emerald eyes his voice softened, "Good morning, love."
You groaned and pulled the blankets back over your head, hiding yourself from the captain and the day sure to come with him. Holding your breath, you listened to the sigh of Arthur before he left through the door again.
Rolling over, you stared at the wooden planks above you with fogged over eyes. There was some commotion going on outside, you could hear the angry shouts of
Venomous: Part 10 (EnglandxReader)Venomous: Part 10Venomous: Part 10 (EnglandxReader) in General Fiction More Like This
You woke up with the dried salt of tears on your cheeks and a warmth in your blankets that was left when someone had gotten up just a short while ago.
Blinking your foggy eyes, you sat up and immediately felt that your hair was a wreck. You needed a brush. And a bath. And a new dress. At least something to sleep in.
The door opened and your eyes swiveled slowly to see who was going to see you in the disastrous state you were in.
It was Arthur, obviously. The pirate smiled softly at you, green eyes flooding with concern. When he stepped close enough, he slid one hand onto your cheek, fingers woven in with your rat’s nest of hair.
“Good morning, love,” he muttered, pressing a kiss to your forehead. You pulled away, starting to snap out of your haze.
Arthur seemed a bit taken aback, but his temper didn’t flare, so you considered yourself safe. Looking down at your dress, you took hold of the soiled fabric in your hands.
Venomous: Part 7 (EnglandxReader)Venomous: Part 7Venomous: Part 7 (EnglandxReader) in Drama More Like This
You woke up early, so early that it was dark outside the room and Arthur was still asleep next to you. Carefully, as to not disturb the captain, you slid out of the bed feet first and quietly stepped towards the door.
Upon exiting the captain’s quarters, you quickly scanned the ship for signs of a life boat, but found none. The sun was approaching the horizon and you knew the men would awaken soon, as well as a pirate captain who would not be happy that his prisoner escaped.
At this point of time, you decided to hide.
You ducked through the nearest door and quietly closed the door. However, you were startled to hear a pan clatter on a counter.
Slowly turning around, you saw that the room you had chosen to hide in was the kitchen and eating area, and Matthew was already preparing breakfast.
“Your not supposed to leave your room!” the quiet boy whispered harshly, fear and concern making his violet eyes sharp.
Tears pricked the corn
Venomous: Part 3 (EnglandxReader)Venomous: Part 3Venomous: Part 3 (EnglandxReader) in Drama More Like This
No one was in your room when you woke up again. Instead, you were alone and the room was different. Not different as if you were in a separate room in the same building, but as if you had been completely relocated. Slowly, your senses came back to you and your nose tickled from the salt of the ocean.
When you stood, your legs wobbled due to the rocking of your room. Which caused you to wonder, why was the room rocking?
"Shit," you whispered to yourself as you stumbled over to the only door in the room. You paused upon reaching it, hesitant to see what faced you outside the quiet cabin. Shaking off the uneasy feeling, you quietly pushed open the door, revealing the nearly empty deck of a boat. Curious, you wondered to the edge of the ship and looked over at where you were.
But not where you thought you were, no. You were stopped somewhere you didn't recognize. Still, you were going to take the chance of running. Checking to see if no one wa
Venomous: Part 4 (EnglandxReader)Venomous: Part 4Venomous: Part 4 (EnglandxReader) in General Fiction More Like This
The opium dealer stared at you as Arthur dragged you back through the dark streets and to his ship, where Alfred and Francis were waiting, along with a gentler-looking boy about Alfred's age. His hair was similar in style to the Frenchman, but his violet eyes gazed at you with sympathy as you were shoved back on deck. Alfred seemed annoyed at you, but cowered in fear at the glowering of the captain. Francis only flipped his hair and greeted Yao like a close friend.
Subconsciously, you cringed and shuffled towards the new man.
"Hi," he whispered to you with a small smile. His voice was soft and soothing, something you missed the past few days.
Trying not to draw Arthur's attention from the crewmember he was currently yelling at, you nodded politely at the boy.
His violet eyes followed your's and flickered to the captain before widening at you in understanding. His voice stayed low, lips barely moving as he spoke, "I'm Matthew, the ship's cook." You
Venomous: Part 6 (EnglandxReader)Venomous: Part 6Venomous: Part 6 (EnglandxReader) in Drama More Like This
"You lied to me." His words were cold and dripping with anger as he threw you out of his grasp.
Shrinking back into the wall, you stuttered out your words, "Wh-what do you mean?"
Arthur stepped closer to you, just as slow and calculating as Antonio had. Your breathing became heavy with fear and your (e/c) eyes widened.
He stopped at the edge of his bed, only a few feet of space remaining between the two of you, and fingered his sword's hilt. "You lied to me," he stressed the words, sounding disbelieving.
He tried to keep his tone in check. "Sit down." His words were staccato and threatening.
Gulping, you made your way over to the bed, where you sat on the edge farthest from the captain. His movements were comparable to a snake striking it's prey. He snatched your hands off of your lap and snapped them together. Taking a heavy rope from his desk, Arthur tightly bound your hands together, the pressure enough to bruise.
You winced, but made no o
I'll be okay.No, I'm fine.I'll be okay. in Free Verse More Like This
See? I'm okay,
I've got a smile on my face.
Even if times are rough, I'll pull through
just like I always do.
Stop looking at me, I won't look at you after all.
Because I know, if I do will fall
into your compassion
and I'll scream, shout and
let it out my darkest fears, my deepest regrets and deep seated worry.
Big girls don't cry, that's what they always say.
So why is it that I just want to sob the day away?
I know I'm being selfish,
I know you don't want to see this,
and that I'll cause you trouble.
So that's why I smile and grin,
pinch my pain away
and gulp down the tears.
Being a good liar,
might not always be good.
MaskWho am I?Mask in Free Verse More Like This
More importantly, who do I want people to think I am?
Tears streak down my cheeks,
my arms aching for something
or someone to hold on to.
An anchor of sorts, to tether me
to this infernal world.
I’m sure none of my heroes would have broken down
or cried like this,
like a child who’s lost.
I’m sure they would have relished it,
this feeling of an uncertain wanderer.
would I be able to do that too?
Because I need to find a new mask to hide behind –
the previous lies crumbled on the floor,
mere shards remaining from the image
I’d carved out for myself.
Would someone be able to tell me what to do?
Would I be able to ask anyone who to be?
I’m sure the answer to this from anyone and everyone would be;
But I don’t know who that is.
I can’t ask anyone for help,
though I desperately need it.
For no one to suspect that I’m wearing a mask,
I need to make it so original that one cannot q
I wonderI wonder who’d careI wonder in Free Verse More Like This
If I’d crash and burn
At this very moment.
I no longer do.
I no longer have the fight in me,
Like an engine without oil,
I’m out of juice.
I feel cold.
I wonder what’s wrong with me.
I wonder why I’m still here.
I wonder about these tears rolling down my cheeks,
I wonder if they’re a sign.
I wonder if I've given up.
I feel as though I have.
My body’s still moving
Drawing haggard breaths
That rattle into my aching, empty skull.
I wonder why.
Play at night (AmericaXReader)You walked up to the door, which seemed to magically open. “Heya.” You said, hugging Alfred tightly. He dragged you inside, one of his arms around your waist as he closed the front door. “You know, you’ll go deaf.” He told you, tapping the earphones which were blasting music loudly into your ears.Play at night (AmericaXReader) in Romance More Like This
“You know, you’ll get fat.” You teased, poking his stomach gently. He pouted and you straightened up. “Touché.” You grinned at his remark and planted a kiss on his cheek, using one of your hands to turn down the music.
Interlacing your fingers, he pulled on your hand, tugging you in the familiar direction of his room. “So which one are we playing today?” You questioned, barely keeping up with him as he was taking two steps at a time.
“New one Kiku asked me to test, it’s got a weird name I can’t pronounce though.” He added the last part sheepishly, sinking down in the red beanbag. Joining him
New Years (PrussiaXReader)It was New Years eve and you’d agreed (foolishly) to let your boyfriend invite his two friends over for the celebration. He’d promised it would be fun and said the more the merrier, but still! Well, it was your own fault for allowing it and besides, they’d probably get too drunk and pass out anyway.New Years (PrussiaXReader) in Romance More Like This
You were just finishing up in the kitchen, the red apron that was tied around your neck bearing the brunt of the traces of ingredients. Gilbert was ‘helping’ too by sneaking a taste of whichever nibbly things you created and telling you how awesome they were no matter how many times he got clobbered by the various skillets that were lying around.
He cheered when he heard the doorbell ring and ran off to get tackled by his friends. After greeting each other loudly, they swaggered into the room, completing their Bad Touch Trio, as they called themselves, with identical smirks on their faces.
“Hola chica, I hope you’re going to take as much care of us
Failure is not an optionSilent tears streaked down your cheeks,Failure is not an option in Free Verse More Like This
your lips trembling as you raised the deadly artifact to your head.
Studying in the morning,
studying in the evening.
Going to the gym to stay fit,
not eating much to maintain your poise.
Failure is not an option.
Not at preparing for your future.
Sitting alone at lunch,
your nose always stuck in a book,
makes it hard for people to approach you.
You failed there,
being osctrasized from social groups.
Your former friends turned their backs on you,
all you did was study,
no fun allowed.
Jeering echoed through the hall,
why were you always such a stick in the mud?
Why weren't you ever invited to parties,
why didn't you have a boyfriend?
Cold laughter filled the corridors
as you were tripped,
books flying and glasses cracking.
No helping hand,
nor friendly chastise.
A red handprint clearly visible
on your pale face.
Head in hands,
staring at the moon all night.
a cruel laughing stock.
A quiver of your mou
Mistletoe series (PrussiaXReader)You were in the midst of putting some Christmas presents underneath the huge tree at America’s party when an annoyingly loud voice yelled at you. The Prussian’s shout made you jump, also making you drop the present in your hands to the floor.Mistletoe series (PrussiaXReader) in Romance More Like This
“Hey! Heads up!” You sighed, knowing that if you didn’t turn around quickly you’d probably be pelted with a ball of some sort or even water balloons. What you certainly didn’t expect was the Prussia smashing his lips against yours with fervour as France held a plant above your heads.
Chuckling Spain snapped a picture of your shocked expression. Prussia grinned self-satisfied with being able to kiss you, pulling back from your lips. It was at that point that you realised that the leaves being held aloft graciously by the Frenchman weren’t those of mistletoe.
“You bastards! This is holly!” You cried, chasing the three around the room. “It’s close enough!” They answered in
Anytime (AmericaXTomboy Reader)“C’mon, why the hell is he taking so long?” You muttered to yourself, blowing air from your blown-up cheeks. You’d agreed to go out with Alfred as he needed an honest opinion on some new clothes he wanted.Anytime (AmericaXTomboy Reader) in Romance More Like This
As you rather liked men’s clothes, the foureyes figured you were a perfect choice. Also if something didn’t suit him, you were blunt enough to tell him.
“Hey that guy looks cute, should we talk to him?” You glanced up when you saw a couple of girls hovering in your vicinity.
You sighed, ruffling your short hair. It wasn’t your fault people saw you as a boy, you supposed. You dressed in men’s clothes and acted like one. Though you didn’t really care anymore as you used to, now you’d found people who weren’t weirded out by you and your habits.
“Yo dude! Never fear as the hero is here!” Alfred jumped in front of you, striking a silly pose. You stared at him for a moment then burst out laughing.
The last specimen pt. 2 (ScotlandXLast!Reader)A hand clapped on Allistor’s shoulder, a startled yelp leaving him as he’d been engrossed in staring at the girl. “It seems she’s chosen.” Angry shouts of protest sounded from the now other, unneeded contestants. “That was the test?!”The last specimen pt. 2 (ScotlandXLast!Reader) in Romance More Like This
“No! That’s not fair!!”
The scientist chuckled nervously and shrugged to the outrage and dismay of the angry men around him – who all looked so furious that they could have assaulted the man. “I understand your disappointment, gentlemen,” he tried to calm them, but he only managed to enrage them further. Eventually he was forced to summon the security bots to escort them from the room.
The man sighed and rubbed his neck, sliding his glasses up to his forehead. “Can’t say I didn’t see that coming,” he muttered, casting a tired look at Allistor. “Mr Kirkland was it?” The red-head nodded once, wondering what he would have to do next. “Well
You don't need it (BTTXReader)“Gee (y/n), vhat’s taking you so long?”You don't need it (BTTXReader) in Romance More Like This
“Oui, we’ve been ‘ere for ‘ours already.”
“Amiga, we need to get going soon if we want to catch that movie.”
You groaned, scrubbing your face of the makeup once again. “I’m almost done!” You called from the bathroom, hearing a collective sigh from the three boys. “Ja, zhat’s vhat you said half an hour ago...” Gilbert muttered under his breath, rolling his neck to hear a satisfying crack when he’d managed to get the kink out.
Francis placed a magazine on his face, effectively shutting out the outside world as he started to gently snore. The Spaniard was already fast asleep on Francis’s stomach, muttering to himself in his sleep.
Another ten minutes passed and Gilbert’s annoyance had finally gotten the better of him. “Frau, enough!” He growled, thumping on the door. The sudden noise jolted both Antonio and Francis out of the
you call me an angelyou call me an angelyou call me an angel in Free Verse More Like This
in spite of the bruises left on the fronts of my knees
stains of sin left on my skin;
the knots in my back,
you liken to the wings soon to burst from my shoulders
&tell me you can feel no sadness
when looking at my face-
eyes you analyse
into paints of the colour wheel,
several shades i have yet to see;
despite its crooked nature
thinning enamel from my sickness-
you still find me amongst the heavens.
as this once,
i kissed you to shut you up.
my skin is removing itself after my clothes
in the winter,
too unlike the white night of russian summers.
i kissed you &it was wet because i was crying
&every time our lips parted
another sob stuttered its way through the gap.
you heard what words i couldn't swallow,
the ones straining to pass over my tongue
yet drowned upon existence.
you listen to me until i lose my headstrong aim
to starve back to bones,
to see the angel wings i've lost in my skin
you touch &feel are there;
preemptive breakup poemif anyone ever tells you your sadness isn't physical,preemptive breakup poem in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
show them the ache in your bones,
the raw skin on your arms or wrists or hips or thighs,
the imprint of your foetal body on your mattress from the days you couldn't bear to leave.
and you see this?
this is what hurt looks like.
i want you to look closer, lean in a little until you can feel the sadness on my breath
and i want you to watch my eyes. count how often they blink and count how many of them are forcing back words i still can never say.
i don't want you to miss a second of how you make me feel.
i want to be what keeps you up at night
i want to be the reason you can't eat
or laugh at your favourite tv programs
i want to be the reason
you walk with your eyes on the pavement
because too many things
remind you of me
i want you to feel the soreness of a heart unloved
loudly enough that the beating is mute and slow
loudly enough that you keep your hands in your pockets
when you move through the city so you don't touch any
the thing is i wish i were kidding but man,the sky fell when you left.the thing is i wish i were kidding but man, in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
beauty"you're beautiful."beauty in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
"why don't you understand what i'm saying? you're beautiful."
"because girls tell me it all the time."
"yeah, but they don't mean it like i do."
"your face is beautiful, i'll give you that. sad puppy eyes, birds-in-flight lips, rocker-sloppy floppy hair. but your heart --"
"no, let me finish. your heart is so much more. you could fit the world inside there and feel it ache. that's what your pulse is. it's not blood, no ventricle contraction or atrium expansion, it's love. it's the ache of the world in your chest. that's why you're beautiful."
"why does it hurt so much?"
"because love hurts. and that's why we love. to hurt for others."
"to hurt for, or to just hurt others?"
"i don't want this."
"nobody does. everybody does."
"my heart isn't mine anymore, it's --"
"-- everybody else's. i know."
"what's wrong with me?"
"you're more beautiful than anyone in the world, that's what's wrong with you."
"that's a problem?
man at the cafehe's sitting there at the cafeman at the cafe in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
sandwich on thick white bread
and straggling beansprouts
and i hate the look in his eye.
he is by himself
so he's thinking
and his hat is tilted over his face
so he's in shadow
and he won't look up
from his sandwich
so i am actively watching him.
i know he is sad.
i know he is waiting for a girl
to show up,
or maybe he's just thinking of one,
maybe he's just wishing
she were here
because when she's not,
maybe he's never seen her,
but his heart knows she's out there
and his soul can't sleep
until he's found her.
maybe he thinks he knows her,
and maybe she's an ocean away.
maybe he thinks the longer
he stares at the dangling beansprouts,
the sooner she can be
by his side.
and because maybe he knows her,
he won't look for anyone else
and that hat tipped low over his brow
keeps it so his eyes are really
only for her.
for those who want to be in loveyou want to fall in lovefor those who want to be in love in Free Verse More Like This
hard enough to break your bones and
lighten your feet
lighten your heart
so softly that the butterflies you feel
pattering with their gossamer wings
beneath the cage of your ribs
and the breath,
blue in the summer,
can kiss you and the monarchs
as sweetly as your love
and her lips.
you dream of them at night.
silken like clean bedsheets,
familiar as your favourite chair
when you curl up with
a mug of herbal tea.
you feel at home
with her body curled in yours,
only able to sleep
with her skin under your fingers
scenting the blankets
with something no perfume
could ever mirror.
you write love letters
you dream emptily
unless she is there.
you want to fall in love
the way the gods drink ambrosia,
you want to treat her
better than their nectar,
sweeter than honeybees
and their summer-sticky feet.
you want a love beyond poetry,
from winter flurries
to springtime rosebuds
to summer sweet lemonade
to autumnal red leaves u
if alice in wonderland was set in 2012,i might cut my hair if it didn't remind me of you,if alice in wonderland was set in 2012, in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
but just like the fade from september into the pits of october,
i'm not alice, this isn't wonderland, but i am just as surrounded by things that yell,
"eat me! drink me!" and they don't say it but i know they'll all make me bigger,
sadder, fatter, too big to fit into a house, my arms my legs come shooting out,
everything i feel is just too loud-
i should be better than i am.
i should be taking the world by the shoulders, shaking back its shoulders because i am a storm, i am a force of nature and you will take notice-
but my winds are quiet. my rain is sad.
i'm too afraid to swell up in full vigor,
to take what is mine in case it's taken from me again,
i will never forget what you did- in camera flash moments, in sharp moments-
to leave me broken.
there are some cuts that never close up.
there are some things that never get spoken.
and there are some things yo
i am my motheri am my mother.i am my mother in Free Verse More Like This
i carry empty bottles
for every feeling
i never wanted;
they clatter in my bag
and where they are tied
on my wrists and ankles.
the glass glitters
until dulled by the weights
and dim light of the heavy feelings
that fill them.
i am my mother.
i have felt things
on my skin i have tried
to cut away to no avail,
i have tried to smile
until it hurts my god it hurts
and my bones are fire
but you think i'm okay so i'm okay
i am my mother
because i will never be angry
when others smudge the mud
from their feet onto me,
i will never show a scowl or reddened face
for being treated like wasted space.
i will take every jibe with a nod
and half smile,
lips closed over broken teeth
to prevent the possibility of baring them,
presenting a threat,
projecting confidence instead of regret.
i will drag my weighty bottles
and break myself into shards
that cut me with every move
before i dare let them crack.
(mother, do not worry
i am fine.)
when you're not as much human as you are monsterevery human died. i'm still here.when you're not as much human as you are monster in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
in the gardenyou are breath in my bones,in the garden in Free Verse More Like This
buoyant in the blue bay
outside of your house.
you are in the garden
and i am watching from the window
as you watch me back.
i am wearing nothing
but a long strand of pearls
and pink underwear,
and you cannot keep your mouth closed.
i like it better that way
when we kiss.
i like to feel your body
forget how it is to take in air
at a regular pace,
i like to feel its
it makes me feel like
your soul is dancing
when it meets mine.