Mommy and DaddyMommy, Daddy, are you okay?
You haven't talked at all today.
Mommy, Daddy, can't you see?
You're really starting to hurt me.
All you do is scream and fight,
and I hear it all throughout the night.
Sometimes I think my eyes will run dry,
yet whenever I do, I just continue to cry.
"She doesn't care about any of this, she'll be fine by tomorrow!"
Daddy, you don't know how much your words fill me with sorrow.
"Can't you just be civilized?! Stop acting like a child, and apologize right now!"
Mommy, please don't make this worse, or I'll run outside and hide in the snow.
Mommy, Daddy, I wish you would just stop everything and be happy again.
I'm hiding under the blankets, writing these words down with a pen.
Mommy, Daddy, can't you see?
You're tearing my heart into one, two, three.
A piece for each of us, a piece of my heart,
the beating has stopped before it could start.
Two sections I wish I could install into both of you,
yet I'm afraid I have not yet found the proper glue.
"It isn't your
AbsenceShe used to lie awake all nightAbsence in Free Verse More Like This
consuming letters with voracity;
it was the utopian lair she created
to slip away from the turbulent world.
Only too soon she learned
that you can't always hide
within parchment crevices.
(reality always finds you)
Even now, when she yearns to fall between printed canyons,
she can't help but curse those passive and lethargic days;
"It's too damn easy to fall in love with words on a page."
WhisperI want to create an aromatic sea of jasminesWhisper in Free Verse More Like This
and stardust mountains of silver and —
Inkblot skeletons with paper mache
hearts, whose bones shall burn with one glance at the
sun; gravestones of blood diamonds and tears of thistles...
Harp strings ringing in grotesque harmony, screaming
for slender fingers to pluck and caress with devotion.
I want to write
GlacialJanuary wolves stalk her shivering heart;Glacial in Free Verse More Like This
bitter ice-fangs sink into feverish skin.
Frost devours slowly, succinctly, shamelessly;
yet the howling tossed chains around her
paper-thin limbs and dragged her down.
Arctic icebound lips quivering,
silver eyelashes fluttering emptily,
alabaster fingertips reaching out;
frenzied yet frozen and fractured.
"Drowning," she whispers in a winter song,
and places her mouth upon snow-dusted fur.
"Blood freezing in these frostbitten veins."
And then the pack of aurorean wolves bolt away,
leaving her smiling in the blizzard of humanity.
They say beauty is only skin deep,so hand over that defected scalpel in your bloodless handsThey say beauty is only skin deep, in Free Verse More Like This
and watch carefully as I peel away this tainted skin
to make way for my blackened and corrupted
And everyone can finally see
the grotesque monster that lies deep within
this soiled excuse they seem to enjoy calling
If beauty is in the eye of the beholder,
then why is it that I can't stand
gazing upon my reflection
every time I pass by a mirror?
Open Heart SurgeryI've got ink throbbing through fissured veins,Open Heart Surgery in Free Verse More Like This
poisoning every atom of my soul.
"Bite your tongue," they say.
How I'd love to chew the damn thing off
and suck down every filthy syllable
just like the rotten bone marrow it is.
They'd all watch as my body spontaneously combusts
and becomes nothing but convoluted karma.
And so I wrote,
Teach me the ways of ripping out a human heart,
and stitching it onto ink-stained parchment."
The answer that came was rasped from a cauterized throat:
"Read your future in the collapsed palm of the stars;
find the abandoned pulse of your lionhearted muse;
steal their conformed scalpel and make it your own."
Poetry is:Poetry is:Poetry is: in Free Verse More Like This
the adhesive to
a fragmented soul;
broken wings that still dream of
F L Y I N G
how snapdragons breathe stardust
and orchids perform ensembles.
when 'imagination' and 'reality' at last discover a
c r o s s r o a d s,
and rush to embrace one another with fervent limbs.
why gravity seems to f
l, taking the world with it.
what flows through the veins of every pair of [shipwrecked; star-crossed] lovers.
who I am; who I was; and who I want to be.
.I stare at the screen, waiting for some burst of inspiration to rain upon me like a meteor shower sent straight from the gods of literature heaven.. in Emotional More Like This
A sigh escapes my lips, and I haphazardly bash random buttons of the keyboard, watching as the blank document before me is littered with an incoherent placement of characters. The monotone click-clack seems to just resonate with the narcoleptic beating of my heart, further fueling my senseless crusade.
Where has all my writing gone?
It feels like it was just sucked right out of my soul. Ideas constantly plague my mind, yet all I can do is write them down. When I go to type them out, nothing happens. And then, just as quickly as my urge to write appears, it is gone in a flash—and all I can do is slump forward and hope that maybe next week I'll get something productive done.
My fingers halt in their endless assault of the keyboard, and my eyes slide up to scan the nonsense I've created on the bright screen. It's n
-My mind- in Free Verse More Like This
s h u t u p.
Too many "fuck you's"
that morph into
drip off this
Try and make it better. Fail. Try again. Break down.
So many faults
that seem to just
turn me into someone
Look into the mirror. See nothing but a clone. Fabrication. No longer me.
I stare and want
to break that glass
so that I can also
b r e a k.
Try and say something. Turns into nothing but rage. Take it out on you.
This shattered heart
only wants to make it
and become one again.
"I want to hate you."
"But I can't."
"So I hate me instead."
"But why won't this stop?"
"Why can't you make it stop?"
"...it's not my fault."
Say what you want to say. Honest brutality.
"H E L P M E"
It's time for me to
s h u t u p.
Ode to BrasOh bra, dear bra,Ode to Bras in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
such close friends we are.
Never straying by my side,
never going far.
But bra, dear bra,
I must confess it this day:
At times you can be painful,
and my skin tends to flay.
Oh bra, dear bra,
why must you be so conflicting?
Meant to hold up females modestly,
yet force us into awkward itching.
So bra, dear bra,
I am afraid I must ask:
For being such a wondrous garment,
why must you be such an ass?
Oh bra, dear bra,
so tenacious around our chests.
Would it kill your rigid fabric
to alleviate our suffering breasts?
Yes bra, dear bra,
I mean my words today.
Kindly stop your aches and pains
or a dirty game I'll be forced to play.
Oh bra, dear bra,
I wish it this truth to not be so.
If only you were reasonable
and rid us of our feminine woe.
are my words poetic enough for you?maybe not.are my words poetic enough for you? in Free Verse More Like This
because i will never be the fire-hearted girl with remedial stardust lips,
dancing with the astral wolves that hunt beneath her moon-kissed skin,
with the courage to plant wilting lilacs into every crippled soul she finds.
but what if they were?
then i would be the ink blots coating the archives of humankind,
the fractured jewel tucked away in a catastrophic dragon's chest,
and the lyric every mismatched bone engraves into their marrow.
Being A Good Person is a CHOICE!Now, imagine this situation for a moment:Being A Good Person is a CHOICE! in Free Verse More Like This
You are a good father, a wonderful husband.
You go 'pray' every Sunday, doing a wonderful lip-service.
You've taken your kids to soccer practice
And you are ready to enjoy your Sunday.
Tui bu qi, ni ke yi pang wo ma?
You turn around and see an old Chinese lady.
She can't speak English and needs assistance.
You pretend you cannot hear her and drive away.
Smooth-stuff dad, you should return that #1 mug...
To me however, there would be no question.
I was late to a part-time job, it would actually cost me money;
And did I mention I can't speak Chinese either?
Instead I communicated with gestures and signs.
She wanted to go to the train station, as I later learned.
With your car it would have taken five minutes.
But we walked and that is also okay.
To be honest, you might think you've done more good than evil.
You might think there is a welcoming committee for you at the pearly gates.
I regret to inform you however, that
These Words Aren't PrettyThese Words Aren't Pretty:These Words Aren't Pretty in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
My verses are ugly and I admit to the fact
I can't use pretty language when I'm working with rap
Because the things that I write, are just the things that I feel
I ain't an Edgar Allan Poe or a Danielle Steel
And I'll be honest with you, I've got an envy inside
Because some poets got a flow that's as smooth as the tide
I read some stuff that they write, it's just so dope I ignite
Burning shame and my anger at the beautiful sight
And like birds of a feather, they're flocking together
These poets are the Gods and I'm nailed by the weather
But as the rain pours down, lightning resound;
I try to write pretty words but my lips remain bound
So deeply silenced by fear - the darkness I hear,
Afraid to be unloved by the ones I hold dear
I've hit the limit of time; my lyrical crime
These words that I've lived are just turning to grime.
So I wish I had their talent; just a sliver of that
If their skill was a mountain then I've broken my back
It's like t
Six Words for a SlumpSix Words For A Slump:Six Words for a Slump in Free Verse More Like This
You're tired, unable to create anything.
You feel angry; the anatomy's wrong!
Why won't these words come together?
"Nothing's right anymore, my hands tremble..."
Yet the solution is fairly simple...
I'm showing it to you now;
Break up your ideas, smaller sized.
They come together, like in Tetris.
Rotate the blocks; shape your art.
Draw chibis and stick figures too.
Instead of epics, try a haiku.
How about a six word story?
If your mind is blocked, overheated.
Let it cool; take it slow.
By attempting all the smaller things,
Your art is sure to grow.
-Chen Yuan Wen, 5th January 2013
I Know You Hate Me Now But...I Know You Hate Me Now But...:I Know You Hate Me Now But... in Free Verse More Like This
Just give me a chance alright, I'll explain
To me, you're the girl that I notice everything about.
The way you laugh, the way you smile;
We got along great back then, even if we don't now.
And to be honest, I miss that...
You had the most lovely silky smooth hair
You'd give me the cutest anime girl smile
I wish I'd talked to you more about Manga,
Hell you got me started on the whole thing.
You were fantastic at drawing too
Man I was always jealous of that talent,
And I loved your drawings, like I once loved you.
I wish that you could have been a professional.
I would have bought your book every month y'know...
You encouraged me to write.
Back when my stories were shit,
Back when my poems were still baby's rhymes.
You taught me not to give in and I was grateful.
Now just let me finish alright?
I know that you won't speak to me.
That's okay, I admit to being an ass,
But the reason that I'm writing this poem to nobod
I've Changed (Yeah right)I've Changed (Yeah right):I've Changed (Yeah right) in Free Verse More Like This
You know, I tell myself everday,
That I'm going to change - that I'll be different.
'This isn't the same; I'm not the same,' that's what I tell myself...
As I sit in front of the computer, praying time doesn't move.
Coward, you're weak and you'll always be weak! You bloody disgrace...
I pick up some new magazine, get inspired,
'I want to be like that guy,' is what I think to myself.
I give it a try for two or three days - I quit.
Same old shit again...
Making up excuses? It's what you always do, you gutless wonder...
I try to reach out with my hands,
Seeking something, anything that I can find to help myself hold on...
But I don't find it - I just find myself,
Sinking back down into the same black swamp - I'm drowning.
Awww, what's the matter? You gonna cry, you gonna cry?
Yeah, I've hit rock bottom,
And you know what? It feels pretty damn good down here.
Nice, warm, comfortable, familiar.
No pressure, no problems - just like everb
My Beautiful FilthMy Beautiful Filth:My Beautiful Filth in Free Verse More Like This
We'll start with the rose petals
scattered lavishly across the bed
A symbolic collage of my broken thoughts
like memories crushed and thrown into the winds
they lie where they fall, forever forgotten...
Tacks and nails shall line the floor!
A perfect representation of my painful steps
To walk forward was to suffer
to stand still was to endure
Like the insults thrown at me, like the physical abuse
they drive their way into my skin and remain embedded
Unable to be removed except by force
And now comes the masterpiece, the perfect finishing touch
A wall of words and photographs depicting my sorrows and greivances
The filthy shame of these long years and the pain which I've kept inside
Now I engrave it into this concrete canvas...
Let all the world know of what was done to me
even as I part from it...
For in death I swear they shall have no reprieve!
In life I wanted to be beautiful and in death I shall finally be so
For the weight of
I Comfort MyselfWith a warm drink, whispering secrets to my own reflection.I Comfort Myself in Free Verse More Like This
The struggles that plague me, though none may know,
Are only for the ears of my quiet mirror, who smiles
Softly, warmly and with care. He tells me, I'm fine
I've done well for now and soon I may finally rest.
Though the silence continues to press upon me,
Weighing upon my soul like an iron crate.
Still I find comfort in whispering secrets,
If only to my own reflection - holding a warm drink...
-Chen Yuan Wen, 17th October 2012
You Left Me StrongerYou Left Me Stronger:You Left Me Stronger in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
Hey there, it's been awhile, do you remember me?
I guess you might not, since I wasn't very important to you.
You know, I spent so many days thinking about - what I did wrong
I questioned if maybe, I was at fault or if I was screwed up.
I thought a lot about the things you said...
The things that were my fault, my problems.
I took them to heart at first, but then I realised you were wrong.
I realised that you are selfish and ugly on the inside.
On the surface you pretended to care, but like a cancer;
You amputate someone the moment you think they've gone bad.
You hide from the rigours of life and only emerge like a parasite
When everything is good - when everything is fine and dandy.
I used to think that I was afraid of you leaving,
But now I know, that you've left me stronger than I was before.
You know, this was supposed to be an emotional whine; an emotional spill,
Maybe I was supposed to cry tears and beg you to come back, but you know wha
Sending Me To HellSending Me To Hell:Sending Me To Hell in Free Verse More Like This
I close my eyes, as the black smoke fills the air.
Incense burned to create a semi-choking sensation.
A tiny inkling of the perceived suffering,
But it is enough to make this difficult...
Next, wounds are carefully opened.
Patterns carved into the flesh,
Resembling the nine circles of suffering.
As each begins to form a red river,
An ocean pools beneath my stained elbows.
In the distance I hear the cackling of witches;
Accompanied always by the mad shrieks of those beyond.
Already they can taste the red wine that I ooze
And eagerly, their tongues wag; anticipating the feast.
Concentrate...I have to concentrate
My teeth grind together, as I force them shut,
The pressure causes my jaws to ache and my body soon stiffens.
It seizes up like an iron vault, my mind its secret mechanism;
Twisting, turning, seeking the accepted combination.
I can feel them now, reaching for me...
Tongues begin to lick at my open wounds,
Lustfully salivating unto m
To The Beautiful YouTo The Beautiful You:To The Beautiful You in Free Verse More Like This
Here we are, sitting behind these screens of glass,
Reading lines of text, yet smiling, laughing and crying.
It's strange to think that I could have this much fun -
Considering that I've never met you before, but then again
Perhaps that's the reason why I don't have to pretend.
Some people might tell me, that what we have is just a fantasy,
I doubt I'll have the chance to actually see you in this life-time.
But even so, in the time that we've spent together - Well,
I feel as though I've connected with you, more than anyone else.
I feel as though I know you better, than those just a few feet away.
You might take this little confession as something silly,
Maybe you'll even forget about it as time passes,
But I for one could never forget about someone like you,
And so I'd like to dedicate this piece, to the beautiful you.
-Chen Yuan Wen, 17th December 2012
Wonder.Do you fear your own death?Wonder. in Free Verse More Like This
Is it hard to conceive?
Draw in your last breath, then-
Your last breath will leave.
Isn't it strange to think,
That there's a timer above your head?
A countdown you can't see,
That finishes when you're dead.
Don't you ever wonder,
What it'll be like when you're gone?
I bet the world will keep on spinning.
There will be another dawn.
But the harsh reality behind it-
We're all going to die.
There's no reason to try to fight it
Not even to question why.
It makes me wish that I could have a little more to give,
Because I'm not afraid of how I'll die...
I'm afraid of how I'll
Missing Pieces.I am a missing piece. Something that someone needs.Missing Pieces. in Visual & Found Poetry More Like This
But at the same time, I feel so incomplete.
I’ve wandered way too far, wondered for far too long
Am I a missing piece? Or a piece that won’t belong?
Is it possible I’m damaged and not missing at all?
That I’m just as dysfunctional as everybody else?
Pretending to be perfect never softened a single fall.
But neither did admitting that you’re broken and flawed.
A broken missing piece. Is that all I’m meant to be?
There is no master plan that includes the likes of me.
Being all alone, it’s a hurt that will not cease.
A hundred thousand years from now
I’ll still be
Stenciled Smiles on Paper HeartsI don't like to feel this wayStenciled Smiles on Paper Hearts in Free Verse More Like This
There must be something I can say
Cause I hate just watching you
When I know the pain you're going through
You're not alone; I've been where you are
Contemplating where I'll place my next scar
Hiding razor kisses underneath long sleeves
It doesn't make it better; nothing is achieved
All you'll earn are the scars you've got and
The lesson learned is the lesson forgotten
You feel like no one's there, no one cares what you do
Let me put it to you straight: That is never true
I was shunned, pushed away many times before
Then I realized it was I who had closed the door
I took a chance and opened up to the people around me
Told them of my secrets, now their love surrounds me
You're not alone; I've been where you are
And I know that life sometimes seems so hard…
But believe me, from one person to another
To make a book better, you never destroy the cover…
You are worth it...
The Story of UsIt's just beneath the skinThe Story of Us in Free Verse More Like This
Her heart so paper thin
It fell and broke again
It's all because of him
Left her for what she was
A broken shattered soul
She can't believe she can
Repair her heart to whole
She's tried so many things
To ease the pain inside
But she still feels its sting
In each tear she's cried
But then you came along
You took this broken girl
Made her believe she's strong
You have become her world
Look deep into her eyes
Let all the pain subside
Return the tears she's cried
Don't ever leave her side
She's fallen hard for you
Please don't betray her trust
You may have heard this too
This is the story of us...
Poets And Artists.I am self-destructive.Poets And Artists. in Free Verse More Like This
You are the affected.
I’m a thought that’s still in motion.
You’re an idea perfected.
I’m a sacrifice without you.
But with your life, I’m injected.
I’m a thousand puzzle pieces.
You’re the way to connect it.
If Ever I Lost YouWhat weighs on your mind?If Ever I Lost You in Free Verse More Like This
What's taking up your time?
You tell me not to worry and you swear you're really fine
Please open up to me
Tell me of your fears
You know I'll kiss the scars and I'll wipe away your tears
Don't keep it to yourself
You know you're not alone
I couldn't live my life without you ever coming home
I'd be so lost inside
I wouldn't recognize
The person that I see in the reflection of your eyes
Just tell me you're okay, and that you love me too
I don't know what I'd do
If ever I lost you…
Love Me.She falls asleep most every nightLove Me. in Free Verse More Like This
To the sound of her parents pointless fight
And clinging tightly to her tear soaked pillow
She goes to school most every day
Wishing she could run away
From all those who torture her
For not being ‘cool’
Her mother, she just plain ignores her
Her father’s never even there
Who would notice if she were gone?
Who would even care?
She just wants to make it quick
To take this razor as her friend
And feel its tender loving kiss
Pressed against her paper skin
She just wants to make it stop
The feeling lonely, sad and hated
She holds the blade up to eye level
I don’t know how long she waited
She presses hard against her skin
And lines of ink bleed from the pen
The blade, it rests there on her knee
On her arm she wrote
Hurts Like HeavenOh. My.Hurts Like Heaven in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
God, it hurts like heaven;
Longing for all your affection,
Every bit of your attention,
You're a divine intervention.
In this life that's turned to hell.
I can't help it when I reminisce,
In moments that are just like this,
I remember when we had our kiss,
And now how much I really miss,
The times when we weren't separated,
Were the best memories that I've created,
To reunite is long awaited,
I feel like I'm incarcerated,
In my own personal hell.
I can't help it when I think of you...
I hope one day we'll say "I do."
But for now I have to struggle through,
Until the day I get to you...
It won't be long, love, I know we'll be fine...
So, darling, stay strong and keep your hand held in mine...
I'll never let you go and I'll always make amends...
I'll hold on to you forever, or until forever ends...
Acceptance.Friends all stand in front of me...Acceptance. in Free Verse More Like This
Laughing, joking carelessly...
I hide my arms so they can't see...
What it is I've done to me...
And though I try to hang around...
They often leave me feeling lost...
What will it take just to be found?
How much more will my joy cost..?
('Cause I don't live, I just survive)
(Among the crowd, I'm ostracized)
(I can not be indemnified)
(I fell too hard, I broke this time)
My parents always yell at me...
Like I won't get it unless they scream...
But I never do know what they mean...
Why do they have to smother me?!
I've got my back pressed to the fences...
I'm sorry that I'm such a hinderance...
I long to feel some kind of presence...
Something more than this hated essence..
Suffered from my unjust sentence...
All I ask for from this world...
Is a little bit of pure acceptance...
Think of This..You want to end it?Think of This.. in Free Verse More Like This
Think of this.
You write your suicide note... And you set it on the table.
You take your razor, your silver, two inch razor. And you start to slide it across your wrist. You barely feel a thing. After all, the pain of life is more than the pain of the blade.
And you take that belt you never wore, the one that was too tight, the one you starved yourself to fit into. And you wrap it once, twice around your neck... and you pull it tight.
Barely breathing, you put the ends of the belt on something to hold you up.
Something to strangle you.
Something to kill you.
And you die.
And that's the end, right?
So, so wrong.
Your younger brother, the four year old little boy that you loved so much. He walks into your room, only to find you hanging there, lifelessly. Only to find you with dried tears on your pale face. Only to find your suicide note... the one you left right before you died.
And so he runs in tears to your mother. And she reads the note, barely able to brea
You're Not?You're anorexic if you're thinYou're Not? in Free Verse More Like This
You're not? Then you're obese.
If you're different, you're insane
You're not? Then you're a fake.
If you're happy, you're hiding something.
You're not? You must be emo.
If you're dating, you're a slut.
You're not? You must have no friends.
If you're popular, you're a jerk.
You're not? You're a nobody.
If you're quiet, you must be disabled.
You're not? You obnoxious freak.
If you're you, you're wrong.
Then you must be perfect.
I am not a stereotypeSlide the blade across your wrist.I am not a stereotype in Free Verse More Like This
"Doesn't it hurt?"
I can't feel anything.
Punch your own stomach.
Does it hurt yet?
"Why do you do that?"
The pain makes me feel alive.
"I don't know."
"What's wrong with you?"
I'm dead inside.
I'm just depressed.
Stare at your arms.
"What are you doing?"
I just have low self esteem.
I'm just human.
I'm just me.
Bipolar DisorderLook over your shoulder. They're watching you.Bipolar Disorder in Free Verse More Like This
Tighten your stomach muscles.
Bounce your leg up and down.
"Are you okay?"
Don't say anything.
Feel it, feel the thoughts melting from your mind.
"What are you doing?"
They're behind you.
Kill them before they kill you.
Please save me.
Crazy. You're crazy.
No one wants you.
Pull the trigger.
"Please tell me what's wrong."
You wouldn't understand.
"Who are you? I don't know you anymore."
I'm a nobody.
I am Bipolar Disorder.
... "I don't know."
And That's Wrong.You're fat.And That's Wrong. in Free Verse More Like This
Or maybe you're
I don't know.
But you're not perfect.
And that's wrong.
Or maybe you're
But you're not perfect.
And that's wrong.
Or maybe you're
But you're not perfect.
And that's wrong.
Or maybe you're
like everybody else?
You're not perfect.
And that's wrong.
In a Little Girl's MindThere sits the girl with the things in her eyesIn a Little Girl's Mind in Free Verse More Like This
Monsters, destruction, and sweet butterflies
Hopscotch and daisies, surrounded by screams
Beautiful dresses now torn at the seams
Crayons and paintbrushes, villains and grins
Young, gladsome innocence, hatred and sins
Little red houses on roads left to fade
Gorgeous moonlight shining off of the blade
Blood pouring out as she cries her own name
Knowing she's forced to take each bit of blame
She could have stopped it and left it behind
All of these things in her troubled young mind
She could have saved them if she dared to try
Rather, though, she left herself there to die.
Now, others watch as she sits on the ground
Keeping their distance and letting her drown
In her own worries and things she won't tell
Waiting for her mind to kill her as well…
Mind, oh MindSmiley face, smiley face, can't you ever see?Mind, oh Mind in Free Verse More Like This
So much to be sad about, so much that could be
Going wrong for everyone, going wrong for you.
Smiley face, smiley face, don't you feel it too?
Sad face, sad face, can't you ever tell?
So much could be going great, going oh so well
Sad face, sad face, can't you ever see?
Life is spend much better when your thinking thoughts of glee.
Mind, oh mind, why can't you agree?
Thinking everything at once is slowly killing me...
I AmI am the shadow, and I am the lightI Am in Free Verse More Like This
I am the sunlight, and I am the night
I am the battle, and I am the fighter
I am the water, and I am the fire
I am a raindrop just ready to fall
I am the world, and yet…
No one at all.
AnorexiaMeet a girl named No One, with a heart of shattered stoneAnorexia in Free Verse More Like This
Staring at the other girl, the one that's not alone
Girl with skin that glistens, with the eyes of crystal seas
Grin of shining diamonds and a laugh like a disease
Flashes just a glance and soon, she's every trouble's cure
She has everything… and No One's off to be like her.
Eating turns into a crime, she'd rather be away
Thrusting fingers down her throat to make herself okay
Watching as her very bones are seen behind her flesh
There she drowns in tears, for she has not yet seen success.
Minutes turn to hours, and these hours turn to days
Every moment slipping, slowly fading into grey
Rapidly, her body turns to nothing but her bones
As she fights for beauty, as she battles for the throne.
Broken hearts must learn to beat, and this she came to know
Learning it the hard way when her heartbeat grew too slow
Yet, she somehow managed still to shine from what's within
Lying in her casket with her hidden, unseen sin.
Final thoughts ins
I am Me. Who are You?I am thirteen years old.I am Me. Who are You? in Free Verse More Like This
I am not typical.
I am not average.
I am me.
I have been in two mental facilities.
Both times for thoughts of suicide.
I am not emo.
I am not a freak.
I am me.
My mother attempted suicide about six months ago.
My sister attempted suicide when i was eight.
But, I am not a victim.
I am not tortured.
I am me.
My father had a heart attack just over a week ago.
He was hospitalized for nine days.
He recently returned to the hospital for kidney problems.
I suffer from Bipolar Disorder with Psychotic Features.
I have hallucinations.
I have delusions.
But I am not a disorder.
I am not my difficulties.
I am not my troubles.
I am me.
R.I.P WordsDo you know what it feels like?R.I.P Words in Free Verse More Like This
To feel something, but...
be unable to express what it is;
to be silent;
to fight it alone.
I know how much it hurts,
but I don't know how to show it.
Poetry used to be my refuge,
a place where I could be alone -
express all my emotions,
without being judged.
I'm losing it.
I can't connect to poetry.
Everything sounds so stupid...
Everything I write sounds stupid.
I have to erase all my feelings,
because they don't sound right.
The words aren't real.
They don't show what I feel
And maybe this will be the last.
Maybe I'm gone:
lost of all emotions.
I'm truly alone...
I used to have poetry.
Now I have nothing.
Socially awkwardDo you know what it feels like?Socially awkward in Free Verse More Like This
To feel so socially awkward
around people that you feel
uncomfortable in your own skin,
knowing that you don't fit in.
And, you walk away...
thinking that being alone
will be better for you -
but you're wrong.
You just feel even more alone;
even more rejected from society;
perhaps even sad, in some way.
What do you do while waiting for someone?
As you wait, and wait, and wait for them -
hoping they'll come soon
lest you seem like a loner
walking aimlessly around,
causing people to pity you.
And your face gets hot,
you start to sweat because
they know -
they know of how alone you are
and they feel sorry for you.
Today, I cried.December 10th, 2012.Today, I cried. in Free Verse More Like This
Today I cried.
I wasn't bullied today.
Neither was I bullied yesterday.
Nor am I going to be tomorrow.
But I cried.
Because I relived every moment.
And that was enough.
I succumbed to my emotions.
Today I cried.
I wasn't particularly weak today.
Neither was I weak yesterday.
Nor am I going to be weak tomorrow.
But I cried.
Because I relived every moment.
And I'm not ashamed.
I succumbed to my emotions.
But... I'm not ashamed.
Today I cried.
But that's just the way I am.
Once in a while, you just need a good cry.
To remind yourself of:
the little emotion you have left.
Writer's blockInspiration.Writer's block in Free Verse More Like This
What does one even think of?
A monster, rabid, bubbling with froth?
Stars that dance across the night's sky?
Perhaps some psychic business, one's third eye?
Or perhaps something related to blood,
slicing one's veins and arteries to cause a flood?
Maybe, just maybe - a love story?
Where we create and reminisce in an old memory.
Let's take a leap of faith, be extra innovative:
Combine all these stories... into something creative.
A monster that rides the stars across the night's sky
and a psychic that needs blood over their third eye?
Veins and arteries that cause a loving flood
of one's emotions and of course, crimson blood.
And then with the tick, tock, of the clock,
Our story is complete - no more writer's block.
To 2013.Oh twenty-thirteen,To 2013. in Free Verse More Like This
will you love me more?
More than your friend did?
What am I saying...?
Twenty-twelve hated me;
played me like a pawn,
in its many games.
I'm not expecting a lot from you.
Just don't hurt me as much
As twenty-twelve did.
That's all, really.
I don't know what to think of you.
Only time will tell me -
Tell me everything about you.
I'm tiredTruthfully, sometimesI'm tired in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
I want someone to help me
and give me a break...
RememberMemories.Remember in Free Verse More Like This
The thought worries me,
that I might just forget it all.
I'll forget the spontaneous times
where I would feel happy,
for really... no apparent reason.
I'm so scared,
that I'll wake up and
not remember anything,
and even if it means
losing the depressing memories -
I can't bear to let it go.
It shaped me into what I am today,
believe it or not -
all those sad, depressing memories.
And if I were to age and perhaps just
forget it all...
I would lose myself.
What would I do?
Who would I be?
Oh, sweet and painful memories -
please, never leave me.
How are you?"Hey! How are you?"How are you? in Free Verse More Like This
Frozen to the core,
Ready to cry some more,
Life is just rushed...
In so much pain,
Life has no gain,
Not good enough,
Life is just so rough,
No one could care less,
Sorry for complaining so much,
Sorry for being selfish and such,
"I'm fine, thanks for asking! And how are you?"
she knows her paper cuts by name.Rose bloodshe knows her paper cuts by name. in Free Verse More Like This
on her tongue
reminds her of yesterday's.
A heart's hoarded secrets,
love me pretties, &
scarlet letter dreams.
do these boys know
of the bitter winter
like a blizzard
in her veins?
The sharp edges
or the crisscross
of origami limbs?
as deep &
as the ocean;
Ways to conquer heartbreakDance with fistfuls of roses, shred their petals one by one and wear their thorns like armor.Ways to conquer heartbreak in Free Verse More Like This
Write your secrets between the folds of paper cranes and tuck them safely between the empty spaces of your castle ribs.
Open your broken heart to hummingbirds, allow them the warmth and shelter of your arms.
Rebel. Tape poetry to your limbs, Cummings and Sandburg and Sexton.
Take a walk outside of your skin for a while, run with wolves.
Extinguish that forest fire that’s been curling too long in your lungs.
Be that lionhearted girl those snobby poets always write about.
Allow that cavern of stars in your throat to speak your truths in uppercase letters, in free verse yet to be proofread.
Write about wars and victory.
Be the hero.
Please, forgive me.Like lies, you saidPlease, forgive me. in Free Verse More Like This
I make breathing the cosmos
through rose colored lungs
look easy- vertebrae stretched
toward the moon.
& I'm hanging my bones
out to dry, carving Saturn's
rings into my wrists- my
star burst ankles.
I swore then I'd keep my
black tongued poetry
& uprooted limbs far,
far away from you.
But, like lies, galaxies,
& night fevers, you
are the destination
on my star map skin.
Show me what the stars look like tonight.I’ve fallen in love with wars & darkness.Show me what the stars look like tonight. in Free Verse More Like This
The kind of darkness said to have made
shadow monsters of seen-too-much eyes
& the kind of war lands made of
desecrated, dandelion wrists.
I am the wind, the morphine pump
& I’ve carved my bones into stars.
I wear them around my neck
like outward sun marrow
warming my carotid pulse.
These little glow-in-the-dark blankets
aren’t enough to stifle the sounds;
but my anatomy never seemed to fit
together the right way anyway.
binge eatingi have a buildupbinge eating in Free Verse More Like This
of black holes
suffocating my arteries,
having swallowed down
the bitter taste of too many
girls with galaxies traveling
the length of their spines.
i ate them in mouthfuls,
gaping & sad like a binge
reaching for the skies-
unable to hold them all in.
i don’t think the universe
is as vast
as it used to be,
of my ribs;
i am hungry.
& with a collection
of moon sighs
as a reminder
in my pockets,
i will just have to learn
how to calm this swollen
Please,don’t make mePlease, in Free Verse More Like This
fall in love with you,
I don’t want to remember you,
those Sunday morning
or the way your
lost boy eyes always,
always found a way
to find mine.
There are only so many times
I can allow you to slice
through my scar tissue
before I finally
You.You told me onceYou. in Free Verse More Like This
you would break my stars,
tear them from the sky and devour them
s l o w l y.
I neglected to tell you
they all had their own feelings
and your bruises form my own constellation
in the quiet valleys of my firefly skin.
I am the milky way.
And you, my sweet-
You are nothing more
than a dead star
with a pretty name.
Poets have the loneliest hearts.I drink morphinePoets have the loneliest hearts. in Free Verse More Like This
like peach tea;
down 6 pills by morning
just to keep my mind
& I know I can go days
without speaking a word
I want a moon shy girl
with wolves at her back,
bite mark ankles &
a bottle of writer’s tears
tucked under one arm.
I want to be end of the war
kisses bruised into her hipbones;
the epilogue written over her
With these wisteria limbs
February cold, &
these weak lungs
exhaling coralline whispers,
I’ve got a tongue for words
but still have no idea how to love
a universe girl.
wishbones and flowers I think it’s selfishwishbones and flowers in Free Verse More Like This
how I have compared
every other kiss
( After all-
good things don’t
invite themselves into the lives
of little girls who categorize
their disorders by the scars
on their wrists and who
allow strangers to hang them
from their necks like wishbones. )
But, no one’s hands
have ever staked claim
to this scavenged wasteland
not even my own.
And it’s hard to forget that;
please forgive me.
As you will always
be the one who taught me
that it’s okay to be sad.
I am girl.Other boys tell meI am girl. in Free Verse More Like This
I’d look best
& they know
I am girl-
from the curve of my hips,
to this jutting collarbone,
lonely of love bites
But, your hands shape
falsities out of my limbs
with a tongue speaking of me
Why do I allow your body
to find rest against these bones
when you don’t even recognize
the taste of my moon skin
between your teeth?
I Can't WriteI can't sleep.I Can't Write in Free Verse More Like This
Reality is a nightmare I can't escape.
I can't eat.
Food lost its flavor long ago.
I can't think.
Voices are too loud.
I can't breathe.
Air became toxic.
I can't live.
Life is no longer possible.
Wonder HellWelcome to the world of Fuck Ups.Wonder Hell in Free Verse More Like This
Here's your razor and pills.
Make your way to the bridge and stand near the edge.
Don't lose your balance to soon.
Think things through.
Too late now?
Take your time, but not too long.
Mommy might find your note.
Daddy will make calls.
Whatcha doing there?
Slit your wrist and take the pills?
People usually only choose one.
Oh now you're gonna jump?
I hear sirens.
Three - Go!
Your conscious kicked in.
You don't know what to do.
Jump and end it,
or live and regret it.
Time on the clock.
Flip a coin.
Einie miny minie moe.
Here they come.
I hear their footsteps on the path.
Don't worry I'll help you.
Stay away from you?
I'm just going to give you a little push.
Promises Last A LifetimeOutside my car the rain continues to batter down upon the Earth. Seeming as though it's attempting to awaken the Dead below, I count the minutes until I arrive. Three more miles up the road and this will all come to an end. Is that what I honestly want?Promises Last A Lifetime in Short Stories More Like This
On the radio, men on the talk show broadcast, "-and that movie, John, will be coming out on August 22nd." Widened eyes, I pull the car over along the broken sidewalk. My chest heaves heavily up and down while it tries to allow the rest of my body to quiver. Tears fight to break through my closed eyelids. I can't let myself fall apart, not now, not again. Opening my eyes I stare and ahead of me the memory replays through a rain-covered windshield.
"Natalie! Come on! They're here!" Nathan shouted far ahead of me. I raced around the fallen trees with leaves reaching to grab me and over the trickling creek singing the forest’s lullaby, trying to keep pace with him. Nighttime clouded my vision causing me to only see within a few steps
Mommy MommyMommy mommyMommy Mommy in Free Verse More Like This
Look at me
See what all I can be
Aren't you wowed
What can I do to make you proud
Please get out of bed
I'm tired mistaking you to be dead
Please don't cry
You and step daddy don't have to say good bye
Did I do good
I did the best that I could
I didn't mean to make you part
And make step daddy break your heart
No need for shame
I will take all the blame
Please don't date
It really is something that I hate
Don't leave me again
Can't you see I'm in so much pain
Please come back
Your heart has turned black
I don't want to watch the young one
Can't the dates be completely over and done
Are you even my mom anymore
Because you just seem like an uncaring whore
I hope you're happy
Because you've lost me
MessEverywhere I goMess in Free Verse More Like This
Every single place
The troubles seem to grow
Every smiling face
Eventually frowns with woe
Why can't I do
I just screw
Up everything despite
The happiness I try to spew
Is it me
Am I the source of this ache
Does the pain flow free
Is this what I make
Should I go away and hide
Never to see others
Or the outside
But would I stop another's
Pain and be the only one that ever cried
What is a life with no grey
When everyone is sad
I'd give it all away
It wouldn't be that bad
I would finally be able to say
I saved a life
ListenCan you hear meListen in Free Verse More Like This
Listen to my cries
Feel my pain
See your neglect
Understand what you've put me through
Hear me roar
My anger bouncing off the wall
My sadness ringing in
Your deaf ears
Can't you hear me
Do you just not care
Listen to me
Don't walk away
I'm not finished
If only you'd hear me
If only I could make you see
Why won't you listen
Why don't you care
Do you not see the tears
You're the one that's made to care
It's your job
Why can't you just listen
Maybe you can't hear me
I'm just not loud enough
MuteI rip out my vocal cordsMute in Free Verse More Like This
One at a time
With no disregard towards
The blood and gore I'm
Getting on my rotting palms
No one cares anyways
They wouldn't care if I was dropping bombs
They're too wrapped up in their own days
Why make myself mute
Now they can't hear me complain
About my oh so very cute
And insignificant pain
Now they won't need
To suffer anymore
They will be freed
From me, only a constant sore
cR a zYHer outbursts of deafening laughtercR a zY in Free Verse More Like This
Bounced and hurled around
Her 'special' white room
As she rocked back and forth
Hitting the soft pillow like walls
Making the sleeves of her too tight jacket
Move with a similar rhythmic motion
But what stood out the most were her eyes
Even though they sometimes were hidden
By her untamed mass of dirt brown hair
Her bright midnight blue eyes shine brightly
She did not see the white room
Nor did she feel the suffocating pressure of the room
Instead she saw and felt a soft field of green grass
And a little black kitten with amber eyes
That would bat at a delicate butterfly
That carried the starry sky upon its blue wings
She felt the cool spring breeze and gazed
At the quickly fading sunset
That sprouted colors you could never captured
Even she, herself knew that she was crazy
But she no longer cared
She no longer wished to try and grasp
The flimsy string that connected people to reality
And all that came with it
Despite that she was crazy
And no one wo
WordsWords float on a thin lineWords in Free Verse More Like This
Some scurry through
My cloudy mind
Never to be caught only
Leaving their essence behind
Give me writings to where
People can sometimes find
What I mean
No matter what I do
I can never seem to convey
The emotion of my poem to
A person despite who they are
I even doubt you
Will get just what I mean
When I finish a poem I rue
Make the stupid poem
My own words
Are twisting and forming
Into a poem I didn't make
Sometimes I feel like crying
The frustration is so great
I keep writing
Otherwise I'll always
Be just scribbling
HopeHope is just the liesHope in Free Verse More Like This
I tell myself
Hope tells me tomorrow
Will be better then today
So I don't cry myself to sleep
Hope whispers that next time
I'll do things right
When I only make it worse
Hope says that everything will be alright
When I know it won't be
Hope promises that there is a perfect
Person for me and that one day
I'll find that person
Hope shouts that one day
I'll do great things
And will always be rememebered
So that I'll never truely die
Hope sings of a better place
When there isn't one
Hope mocks that it could be worse
But most of the time
I'd do anything to not be me
Hope is merely a lie
But that's okay
Because a lot of things are lies
As Tears Come To My EyesAs tears come to my eyesAs Tears Come To My Eyes in Free Verse More Like This
I try to block out everyone's lies
And I have to deny
That I will cry
Because it is easy
To smile at the sleazy
Rather then to explain why I'm sad
Or why I'm mad
I have no escape from my enemies
And each emotion I hide has a fee
The pressure of it all
Just makes me want to fall
Into the protective darkness
Rather than return to the heartless
And as tears come to my eyes
One more piece of me dies
The Other Side of the GlassOn the other side I can see,The Other Side of the Glass in Free Verse More Like This
Happiness is waiting for me
I want it desperately
But everything has a fee
I knock on the glass that separates me
From the joy that I seek
Thinking someone would let me out
But as I continue to knock I begin to doubt
That they'll open the door
But that just makes me want the happiness more
And I bang on the glass till my hands are sore
I now am not miserable or
Happy, I'm lost but I have hope
You would think I'd give in to the darkness
But seeing the happiness
Brings light into the other side of the glass
Torn WingsTorn Wings in Free Verse More Like This
I wasn't good enough to fly
They said when they decided to rip off my wings
I didn't know why
They said all those terrible things
Feather by feather they tore apart
My beautiful wings and most of all
I couldn't fly anymore, I only could crawl
Didn't anyone care how it made me feel
Didn't anyone care
That I would never fully heal
Wasn't there anyone to keep me from falling into despair
I guess there wasn't a person to save an outcast
So now the only thing to
Do is to try and outlast
The pain, it'll be the hardest thing to do
Besides trying to fly again
It has been so long since I've flown
Am I just setting up myself up for more pain
I could end up completely alone
But I have to try
I have to jump
Just to prove my
Heart is still alive with its constant thump
So here I go
Spreading my wings that have managed to grown back
And I look down at the ground below
At people who's hearts are black
I leap off of the building
To find not a single part
Of me is yielding
I know I am flying,