FrustratingI’m a mind changerFrustrating in Free Verse More Like This
A pessimistic one indeed
Dark minds do not vanish
They stay till their master dies
I miss those times
Where curses were granted
Probably I had played too much
Now, it is slowly shortening my life...
At least that is what I believe
I will use it carefully
Life with no games isn’t interesting
I wish it would work again
I feel like stabbing someone
But I was too nice, too weak, to do anything
How sadistic? I want to burn someone...
Skin someone alive if I couldn’t curse.
++E.Shadow.X++ April 13th 2013
White RabbitI wish to be the White RabbitWhite Rabbit in Free Verse More Like This
I wish to be the One because
I can live in Wonderland
The created dream land
I will be the One
to choose who will be living in my World
I will be the one
who Name those people
I might not be the Queen of Hearts
But that’s okay
I would love to have the White Rabbit’s job
That’s all I want
I will be having Tea time
I will be following Alice
Alice of Wonderland
I’ll be choosing Alice
Who is Alice?
Nobody would be the real Alice
Because the Alice is always killed by Me
White Rabbit, Cheshire Cat, Mad Hatter
Three different people in the same World
Either helping or hunting Alice
Never can the other two knows about the real Alice
Alice is with Me
So the story still continues
Until I was killed
There will still be hundreds and thousands of Alice
The job of White Rabbit is risky
But having to enjoy first before death
Worth a lot
I love dangerous games
Death to fake Alice
I create this World
I create this Game
Kill me to End
A different FeelingNever thought I would actually be so happyA different Feeling in Free Verse More Like This
Never thought you were actually gonna call me the second time
Do you know how happy I was?
Never thought this was going to happen
I thought it would be impossible
Guess I just have to believe in the impossibilities
I have started to like you
and I have started to forget that guy…
It is a great to forget that guy
But is it really a good to like you?
I hope it is…because you are the first…
the first who made me smile during a call
Because of you, I would want to go school
In order to meet you, I would do anything
I think of you more than I think I’m going to be.
I guess this is a sign when you like a person right?
++E.Shadow.X++ March 27, 2013
Muchas graciasThanks for being my lightMuchas gracias in Free Verse More Like This
The days are still young
I’m letting you go…
++E.Shadow.X++ 19th SEPT 2013
my falling worldI’m a little too tired to reactmy falling world in Free Verse More Like This
I only see my world falling
I was too straight-headed
I only thought of happy endings
To react what had happened
It was just all too fast
I don’t feel much but I felt weird
So weird and tired....
As my world falls
It was no surprise to me anymore
I thought I found light, but I forgot...
nothing could be found without trying.
I was too open, what did I think of you as?
One says that I like you
The other says that it was all just admiration
And nothing more than that.
Probably that’s just it.
Happy ending does not exist
That’s why, every few seconds,
There are tragedies. There are deaths.
If only I was back to being Yuki
Everything wouldn’t be as frustrating.
It will be fine and I’ll be with my darkness...
Don’t I love the darkness?
++E.Shadow.X++ April 13th 2013
A to ZAverage test marksA to Z in Free Verse More Like This
But never feels dark
Change every year
Dumb rumors spread through my ears
Every single day
Friends say, “see you” and you’ll say “okay!”
Go away ‘coz you disgust me so much that made me say ew
Hate you till you make me want to slap you
I know that—there’s no use hating somebody
Just because he doesn’t want to be your buddy
Kindness and generosity doesn’t benefit you at all
Let me put it in detail for y’all
Make your life easier with no stress
No stress means more freedom and rest
Of course, I’m serious about this overall
Perfection doesn’t exist
Quit being sexist
Racist all you want
Seduce your siblings and you’ll be the trouble one
Toy your friends
Underestimate their fans
Vague memories of the past
When Yuki was the one who Cast
Xyvette, the Last
Yacking, the spirits vanish fast
Zero, the infinity zeros are still a vast
You had me moldI kept checking my cellYou had me mold in Free Verse More Like This
waiting for a reply
ring-a-ding-dong the bell
maybe I was being a little too pry
I wonder if I chose right
To like you instead of him
Someone that would make my world bright
To let what passed past dim
I will not be so fast
So it looked as if I was being cold
You’re probably the first and the last
to have me mold
++E.Shadow.X++ 4th APRIL 2013
How shall i describe these people?Is ridiculous how shallow human brains might beHow shall i describe these people? in Free Verse More Like This
To believe when a ‘yes’ is said
When it is obviously wrong to me
but what price would it take to be paid?
Nothing needs to be paid
as long as it doesn’t hurt you
So why care about what was said
why bite off more than you can chew?
++E.Shadow.X++ 4th APRIL 2013
SONNETShall I compare thee to a ghost?SONNET in Free Verse More Like This
Thou art more haunting than I thought so.
Tornado does kill a thousand of hosts,
And thy job is to watch the faded souls.
Sometime thy big green eyes look into mine,
In the darkness of the deserted park,
Looking at me like you’re a mute mime,
Stood still and stiff when you heard a bark.
Thy lovely image shall not disappear;
Memories we spent will be cherished.
Once disappear, there will be only tears;
And as I hope, it will never vanish.
So long as I can breathe or eyes can see,
And can hear, I’ll be able to find thee…
(Yuki) ++E.Shadow.X++ 2009
FALLING APARTFALLING APARTFALLING APART in Free Verse More Like This
Everything is falling
In the other-side of the world
I no longer see anything special
In that class I’m currently in.
I’m mentally falling apart
I asked for help
But none came
I’m emotionally falling apart
Soon going back to the old me
I do not want to return
But is it optional?
++E.Shadow.X++ 14th of DEC 2012
A Midnight WearyA Midnight WearyA Midnight Weary in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
Amongst twinkling stars,
Much like a cricket's chorus;
Types his essay:
"Failure is red,
My parent's say;
An Asian get 'B'
Is shameful display!"
Words for the Young BloodsWords for the Young Bloods:Words for the Young Bloods in Free Verse More Like This
To all my ninjas sittin' low on the street side,
I want you all to raise your head with pride.
Because I'm callin' out, for the youth to come together
And get those big wigs off the fuckin' power ladder.
You ready? Because we're going at it hard:
See I'm the kind of guy that they're all playin' with
A systematic crisis workin' in the way we live.
The big shots still sittin' and they growin' fat.
With young bloods starvin' just to get their life on track.
We take psychometric tests and make a passing grade,
But ain't no job cause the corporate head is gettin' paid.
And when they screwin' with the money, they ain't never cut.
The young bloods be the first to get their letter up.
I say the system ain't shit and we all got it wrong,
The old mothers are just stayin' in for way too long.
I say we cut them from the system that they fucked up,
And let the young bloods take it; we'll just fix it up.
They set the game, but we're the ones playin' main;
I guess t
A Game We Hate to Play:A Game We Hate to Play:A Game We Hate to Play: in Free Verse More Like This
I stand amongst a screaming crowd,
And you'll hear them shout it out.
"All this shit just isn't fair,
Life's a game but we don't care!"
Hear me, do you think I'm lazy?
When I talk I'm crazy,
Sorry I'm just hazy, but I-
Still think that I'm like Jay-Z
Rappin' here with Stacy;
The boys they call her baby; Haha...
And we're playin' this song for the killers,
The ones with no hope workin' shop at the tillers.
And if you think that we're just the fillers,
You wouldn't be wrong; we're just grain at millers - haha!
All this shit just isn't fair,
Life's a game but we don't care!
We're gonna change the game tonight,
C'mon let's turn out the light!
All this shit just isn't fair,
Life's a game but we don't care!
We're gonna change the rules tonight,
C'mon let's turn out the light.
Lights off, everybody nights off,
Walking through these streets of -
People drinkin' Smirnoff;
Prayers for tomorrows,
Whisper as they borrow
Player versus PlayerPlayer versus Player:Player versus Player in Free Verse More Like This
Elemental artisttry, as lightning weaves through the air.
I see the bloodthirst in his eyes, the hunger for victory.
A demand to be recognised, yet soon to be silenced;
Perfect and perfunctory - my opponent made defunct...
As I stand above this dying creature;
The flicker of life soon fading from their eyes.
I smile and whisper a word of parting,
For the fool who fell where he lies.
-Unfinished piece by Chen Yuan Wen, 10th April 2012
I Like To Play With SkinI Like To Play With Skin:I Like To Play With Skin in Free Verse More Like This
My dear friends and watch,
As the feeling of life itself
Crumbles beneath each ounce of pain.
Needles slowly piercing into the body,
Paralyzing nerves and expressions.
A mask of pure horror; living terror,
Kept alive on the barest limit of the border.
Such tempting features,
Leave me eager to slip a knife beneath flesh.
Ripping soft layers of epidermal mache,
Tanned and dried, woven slowly into a loving mask.
And with my latest acquisition complete,
Only twenty spaces remain...
-Chen Yuan Wen, 28th April 2013
The Flower of EvilThe Flower of Evil:The Flower of Evil in Free Verse More Like This
Evil is but a blooming flower,
It is born from a humble seed
And grows to corrupt a forest.
To watch its infection spread;
To be a part of its existence...
I can think of no better prospect,
Indeed one might baulk at the idea,
Of seeing millions suffer.
To watch worlds scream and writhe;
To see them suffer and die, with living eyes...
Yet there is a mysterious beauty in such devastation,
Fear that shakes me to my very core;
Is transfigured into a twisted pleasure:
As I am frightened, so too am I aroused.
I am addicted to the ephemeral sensation;
To the borderline between rapture and rupture.
To see my own blood soaking from splitting wounds;
Leaves me maddened amongst these blooming flowers
-Chen Yuan Wen, 1st May 2013
Remember Your DuesRemember Your Dues:Remember Your Dues in Free Verse More Like This
You think you can forget it;
As soon as you forget it,
Believe you will regret it,
Relieved of all your credit.
Your honour and your lifestyle,
Curled around my knife while-
You sit and play your games,
Thinking everything's the same.
But I'm watching and I'm waiting;
This patience suffocating,
But it's worth the while I'm waiting
For this hatred I am facing.
You thought it was forever,
And so you did endeavour;
To pretend the chains and ties,
That bind you; they have died.
But the fact is you have lied;
Forgotten where you're tied.
The markings on your side,
Remember why you hide!
But its too late for apologies;
The ice has just cracked -
And my gun has just cracked,
And soon you're getting capped.
No love for another traitor,
No love for another hater.
Remember who is greater:
A king or his creator?
-C-Dragon, 22nd April 2013
Into The Mental AbyssInto The Mental Abyss:Into The Mental Abyss in Free Verse More Like This
To the edge of the very abyss I have travelled.
With worn feet, gone bloodied and bare;
Dragged upon stones that stretch like sharpened spines,
Leaving tattered spoils of flesh in my wake...
Even so, I am incapable of halting;
Like a zombie, I remain numb and hypnotised.
Shambling ever onward, toward the glimmer of light.
Eager to be behold the 'she' that awaits me:
A wonderous wellspring of inspiration and knowledge;
Perfect, yet fragile, in both shape and form...
It is her majesty, her radiance,
That leaves me drained...
Alone in the depths, I am humbled and awed.
Yet the admiration that I feel soon turns corrupt,
It renders my thoughts both dark and cracked...
For if any other were to find her,
They would wield her as a weapon.
They would have no need for inspiration.
Creative thought would be an utter simplicity:
Leaving a perfect world, without opportunity...
Indeed I could never share such a thing.
Jealousy leaves me ugly, but still I c
The Witch HunterThe Witch Hunter:The Witch Hunter in Free Verse More Like This
The morning is cold with a solemn chill
As the black wagon rolls into town.
The people are silent, like a funeral wake;
Their eyes never leave the ground...
The choked rasp of hindered breathing
Can be heard as he emerges from within.
The priest bearing the book of executions;
It is bound with the blackest strings...
Let evil be destroyed on this lovely day
The priest growls with a twisted grin.
He signals to his companion, who steps out lightly
This man shall purge this town of sin!
The priest then opens the book and waits;
His companion simply gazes into the crowd.
He looks as though he is listening;
And apparently the sound is loud...
With a movement as quick as a bolt of lightning
He reaches and grabs the arm of a boy.
The boy struggles and hisses violently
But the man controls him like a toy...
He places the boy on a special table
Forged and smithed from blessed iron.
The shackles keep the boy in check;
As he thrashes abo
Practice Poem - Poor Little TimmyPractice Poem - Poor Little Timmy:Practice Poem - Poor Little Timmy in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Down into well, poor Timmy fell,
Down he fell into the pits of hell.
Brought into hell by an eldritch spell,
Poor little Timmy who fell down the well.
Alone he cowered and shivered and shook,
He shook for hours, so long it took,
So long it took for him to feel well,
Well enough to explore this hell...
Through pathways littered with scenes most gory;
Most gory indeed was little Timmy's story,
A story of fear and suffering defined,
Poor little Timmy, he ran out of time...
Now then, I think I'll go welcome my little guest...
-Chen Yuan Wen, 14th December 2012
Quietly suicidal."Those things'll kill you,Quietly suicidal. in Free Verse More Like This
"I'm counting on it, sweetheart."
Things I'll tell you when you're older (4).There is never a wrongThings I'll tell you when you're older (4). in Free Verse More Like This
time to love someone,
but sometimes there will be
the wrong someone who
will love you the
Things I'll tell you when you're older (6).In the end,Things I'll tell you when you're older (6). in Free Verse More Like This
you're all you have.
Clockwork.She shows up unannounced.Clockwork. in Free Verse More Like This
Her shoes in one hand and
her heart in the other;
butterfly wings and
mud strewn on the carpet.
"I don't want to talk about it."
And I wasn't going to ask, but
She steps over the welcome mat and kisses my cheek,
"you need to shave,"
she says as she drops her shoes and her
heart in my hands (flutter-stopping clockwork).
I left my trust in the desert.I still thinkI left my trust in the desert. in Free Verse More Like This
you'll leave me
Dear Eleanor.Dear Eleanor,Dear Eleanor. in Free Verse More Like This
I wrote you a letter
but I don't know where to send it.
You've been trying for years
to make someone your home but
you can't build a life in
someone else's skin and I
wish you'd stop trying.
You were/are/will always be
a skeletal vision of loneliness,
burying your bones in another
person's chest in the hopes that
they might grow you into
something loveable enough
And I wish I could have
kept you, but you are terrifying
You left your
shoes in the wardrobe by the
guilt you saddled me with
and I stopped trying to
give them back.
Sweet deceit.Your promises areSweet deceit. in Free Verse More Like This
sinking cavities into
You burnt a hole
into my gums,
another on my
a million into
(I forgive you.)
Anagapesis.Early morning;Anagapesis. in Free Verse More Like This
white china flies by my head
and I roll my tongue around the hairpin
'I love you'
'I wish you were dead.'
A(nother) letter to myself.You have grown.A(nother) letter to myself. in Free Verse More Like This
You are not ten years
old and silent.
You've found the words
and you have made them
your sword and your shield,
your battering ram against
the walls you built when you
were too afraid to live.
And I know that some days
you feel like letting go,
That you wonder if it might
feel like flying if you spread your arms
and close your eyes and pretend you
aren't doing this to die.
You have stood on the edges
of rooftops and bridges
(To follow her, I know,
but you were not born to go this way.)
and you have climbed back down.
You will make it, my girl,
by the skin of your teeth.
And when you get here,
I will have built a life out of
the ashes of yours.
You will be born into me,
and I am strong enough for both of us.
Scorpion"Show me your bones."Scorpion in Free Verse More Like This
the atlas of her thighs quaked
as she misplaced her skin
in the backseat of his car.
"I'm a scorpion, you know-"
a messy promise
& she smirked,
sure of her limbs,
her scars, & her teeth.
"I dare you to stake claim to this clavicle."
astrological.i. On some nights,astrological. in Free Verse More Like This
street lights guide
this lonely heart
to her lonely bed.
ii. In this universe of twilight skin
& mismatched bones,
I wonder just how many poems sleep
beneath the inkwell of her eyes.
iii. My body is a house of stars,
and her palms are black holes
sucking ( me ) into their vortex of
iv. She says, "Please—my moon,
please—give these bones a reason
& I am whispering lovelies
into the sanctuary of her heartbeats.
v. "Goddess temple,
sunset eyes, &
my windowpane love-
Let us eat the stars
fly.this is hard for the world around us to grasp:fly. in Free Verse More Like This
these wildfires raging in our retinas
& the sins we wear like demonic similes
on our tongues- they are not enough.
& i am so fucking sorry of saying i'm sorry.
but, tell me,
what is a young poet(ess) to do
with veins made of kite strings?
Collection of poetic nothings.We were opal Tuesdays,Collection of poetic nothings. in Free Verse More Like This
tattooed into the
rose garden curve
of my vertebrae,
gliding me through this wild youth.
But, like Icarus—
I was a sky conqueror
& these silk wings
touched the sun.
My inhalations are heavy,
like the earth he bruises
beneath his fingertips
as I chase silence.
"You've got a tongue
made for words." He says
against the arrogant thorns
of my briar spine.
"Learn to love yourself."
How do I say I love you
without saying I love you?
"I want to replace my heart with you."
You are spider silk woven
into my harvest moon
limbs traveling this road map
of songbird sin.
You are not just in my head now,
you are dancing in the lingering stars
of my night-witch frame
& setting me on fire.
You're not bruised enough
to write poetry.
Allow these bones to tell your story, Love.
wet scribbles, tattooed tragedyI am shedding my skinwet scribbles, tattooed tragedy in Free Verse More Like This
like the poetry that bleeds
from your ink-cracked lips
onto the bare bones of my
Unfold these moon-shy limbs
that chase silence
& beg stay-with-me.
For you are the only verse
hidden within this labyrinth
of scar-damaged flesh.
astrology.i lost my cigarettes today whileastrology. in Free Verse More Like This
sparing kisses to too many witches
with apastron blackberry tongues.
& like the scattered stars of scars,
saturn's rings whispered secrets
to the telescope eyes of these strangers
cradling galaxies between lovely bones-
( their fingertip heat
knowing nothing of intermissions. )
William,If I am nothing but an actorWilliam, in Free Verse More Like This
on a stage in this dust town
of rose torn bones and washed up
stars, why is it that the galaxy sculpted
crescent moons in my palms
I could make a list,but I merely bit my lip when she asked me,I could make a list, in Free Verse More Like This
"What is it you're thankful for?"
How could I tell her
I was thankful for this heart
that beats a thousand times over
when I hear her speak?
dust.I'm chokingdust. in Free Verse More Like This
on the ink-dipped fingers
of verbs & metaphors
still lodged in this bruised,
paper crane throat;
of your words,
still kissing my ribs.
How can you judge me-
when you don't bother
to read the naked poetry
beneath the temple of my flesh?
How long can butterfly
ankles hold up a
Don't bother whispering
your secrets to nebulae,
not even the dust in my veins
will listen anymore.
Dear Poetry,I might be dangerously on the verge of being poetic, but-Dear Poetry, in Free Verse More Like This
Sometimes I don't feel me in my own skin.
I am too many breaks between pulses,
& a heart still living in the autumn of 99.
I'm telling stories about a girl.
A soul made of ink & godly metaphors,
too much for a non-homeostatic body.
There were once fireflies in her smile,
alight between the gaps in her teeth.
love letters carved into wrists
she never sent.
She is Porphyria, & you are her lover.
A Southern DesireA Southern Desire in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Home...Home is where that heart lies,
and my heart burns...
It burns to but a husk of its former self.
Can you not see that allowing the fires to grow,
is no better than tossing more fuel
upon its already aggressive hide?
It merely thirsts for more fuel
and hungers for more kindling...
yet its appetite will never find satisfaction.
This desire from south of Heaven comes,
The heat rises with every spark,
and this is what they want more than you realize.
The Man in my EyesMy flight is uncontrollableThe Man in my Eyes in Free Verse More Like This
beneath the heavy waves...
And when the sand of the
shores finds my unconscious body
I awaken, and my eyes
are named dazed and confused.
The waves tug and push,
and they sound like muffled screams.
Sand is caught in the mysterious
and open wounds the ocean gave me.
The trees sway almost with
the wind in a breeze of anarchy.
My heart races faster
than the tugging waves...
The pieces of my ship are
scattered along this shore.
Broken like pride, useless
pieces of trees long dead.
A twitch becomes a movement
within my limbs and I rise.
Yet I only descend back to
the rugged sheets of sand.
My eyes roll and my environment
fades to black.
A hooded figure with wings
visits me in realm unknown to me.
His presence comforts me
and soothes my soul.
A hand meets my shoulder,
and a voice tells me to wake up.
Before my opening eyes
fades into my vision, a man.
He stands like a lion, and remains silent
with the grin such majesty.
No pride encompasses his essence,
but only t
Genre, Oh GenreGenre, Oh Genre in Free Verse More Like This
Shame befalls me, for what the muses inspire.
Is such the magnet of my psyche? Such dreadful words from pen to paper?
I question not my sanity, only the purposes for which
such written things flow from me, as to what message is to be sent...
Though dedication fills me to the brink, so does a constant curiosity...
overflowing to the shores of embarrassment.
Shame befalls me, but I write as a messenger, and my muses come from Above,
where even dreaded words are sometimes called for.
The DifferenceThe Difference in Free Verse More Like This
That the dove gathers twigs for it's nest, in which to live as a home, in peace...While the vulture searches for corpses, with which to satisfy it's gluttony.... Scavengers both, living & dying by the laws of a bitter nature.
What more can I do?What more can I do? in Free Verse More Like This
What more can I do?
I've lost you, I've lost you.
The tides came in and took you,
Consumed you, and swallowed you whole.
The husk that returned,
It wasn't you, it wasn't you.
What is this fossil of a friend,
Changed, possessed before me?
I felt I could trust this husk once,
But you lied, but you lied.
No more than a fool,
More foolish than you, was I.
No more a man than a boy,
Filthy pig, filthy pig.
The tongue of a liar
Is forked for deception and hypocrisy.
You never listened, never heeded,
Poor fool, poor fool.
Whether right or wrong,
A friends consideration was I needed.
Yet the ocean spat you back out,
Foul taste, foul taste.
And returning meant little to you,
Wearing the cold rusted armor of apathy.
What more can I do?
I've lost you, I've lost you,
Find me again
when you've found yourself.
Begin to Begin to BecomeBegin to Begin to Become in Free Verse More Like This
Perched way up high,
A starved vulture watches me grow
restless beneath a blanket darkness...
A fever grows, tearing away from the inside out.
A cancer becomes my surrounding.
No sense can ever be made of it.
A gasping wind hurls a sharpened wave over me,
jabbing at my withered being,
washing me with a cold grasp.
The vulture, of feather and bone,
watches the seasoning of its future food,
screaming in the agony, I am made into nothing but a carcass.
beneath the iron hand of a broken home,
the vulture is given the go ahead,
and swoops down with an eager gravity.
Perched way up high, I watch with smiles
as the vulture picks away at an empty corpse.
Laughing with wings upon my back.
It's Just a PhaseIt's Just a Phase in Free Verse More Like This
It's when you close your eyes that you can hear endless cries for help,
But you can only see whatever your mind allows.
The world is a beautiful Hell worth fighting for,
all as a matter of perspective.
It's just a phrase, it's just phase,
Adjust the gaze and give none but praise.
Open your tired eyes, let the floodgates swing open
and wash away the dirt and grime of this world.
Find it's beauty, hidden past the piled filth,
and wipe it clean with what tears fall from you.
Redeeming qualities are what outweigh the countless flaws,
yet we ignore them because we love to hate.
What storms come, come to pass,
and at their end does the sky remain.
Dreams on a BattlefieldDreams on a Battlefield in Free Verse More Like This
Oh sweet sleep, take me away...
Away to the restless worlds
Of my subconscious wonderland.
Unhand me, reality...
let go and set me free.
From soul to psyche,
the visitation of my thoughts
To my warped imagination.
Where both angel and daemon,
Do visit me in my nightly coma
My memory fades from my grasp
with the cold sweat and opening of my eyes,
but I do know better as to the cause by effect.
my visitors wage war
within those restless lands.
As they are and have always been,
By dream or nightmare regardless am I
without doubt in the slightest,
intrigued by such evidence
and presence of the transcendent ones.
I know not the faces but the marks are left.
feathers in air, and hooves in earth.
Found in my perception,
blurred but far from blind,
They have long since fooled me...
1. Foul Calamity To Filthy Mind1. Foul Calamity To Filthy Mind in Free Verse More Like This
The widow carried the glass of blood on her back,
up the climb of the standing hairs upon my arm...
Her stare was without emotion,
but all eyes were on me with each and every step.
My hope was in my half empty glass,
yet the widows glass was always filled with blood,
every drop from every venomous bite...
One by one, her steps draw closer to my pounding heart.
She burrows beneath my sleeve,
the receding image of her legs,
is enough to overtake my heart...
the suspense alone ravages my pulse.
What bitter calamity had overtaken the life through my veins,
by God, such a fear building the arctic sweat about my flesh.
I can still feel the movement, as my life slowly fades...
and her muffled laughter sealed my desolation.
Delivered to evil was I, in a web wrapped coffin,
embalmed by and during the final chapter of my story,
Reborn and reconstructed, molded by the ashes
of the past I once thought behind me.
My innocence begged down on its knees,
and with my head tilted, and its rais
I Can't StopI Can't Stop in Free Verse More Like This
So warm, the addictions embrace,
Where calamity leaves me in the fulfillment of yet another craving.
Cleanliness left me long ago, dear mother,
when first you bathed me with ice and mad ranting
Sugar coated was the way we liked it in the gingerbread house,
with a chilling cherry on every top.
I still can and chose the memory of the bones
as they cuddled in my bruised and trembling hands.
I still recall the first of them all...
how the warmth left them like the life in their eyes.
How I danced in my out of body experience,
with myself, as we celebrated the night away.
I remember, dear mother...don't you? Why did you construct
your baby into the monster you so fear?!
Who were you to play the role of Victor?!
To make such horrid thing that I know in the darkest mirror?!
Why should it end here? Why not watch
the play you wrote to it's electric end?
ShatterWhat am I waiting for?Shatter in Free Verse More Like This
Suspense builds & builds
Until the walls come crumbling down
My inner-self is left tattered & torn
I am unavailable
To the world, surrounding features, & figures
I am shielded
My shield made of masks of many years,
Tears of many years,
Experiences from time’s grasp.
It cannot be broken.
I am closed.
I am concealed.
You cannot find me here.
My silent screams will lead you astray.
Do not be fooled!
I really do wish for a shoulder to cry on.
I really am screaming in unnoticed agony
My eyes are glazed over,
Do not be fooled by the shells of “strength” covering the contrasting blue
Arms to hold me,
And only hold me,
No questions asked
Would be a blessing in midst of battle
But I would be a statue,
Immobile in a human body
Stone makes up my entirety.
Bring a hammer to my head,
I will shatter.
Torn and BeatenButterfly delicaciesTorn and Beaten in Free Verse More Like This
Gentle in the whispering wind
Floating on the drift of their wings
A beautiful creature
Supported by such little weight
One turn can snap its wings
A change in events can turn it around
And a mighty storm can bring it
And Yet I Only See Blood and DarknessIf you ask what I am doing in the late hours of nightAnd Yet I Only See Blood and Darkness in Free Verse More Like This
This is where my mind shall rest:
If I cannot be lifeless
I will be gone on the inside
And no one can convince me of otherwise doing
I have given up
The tables have turned & I have now thrown myself in the opposite direction
This tug-of-war has weakened me
And no matter how long & hard your pleas may echo
My brain has set on inward comatose
What I have woken up to doing
What my eyes have been seeing
What my ears have been hearing
What my instincts have led me to believe…
All point to the obvious I have truly gone insane
An insane person belongs away from all
So why not escape from the view of all’s eyes
I will still remain in your sight
It is my emotions & feelings that are not visible
Because they will not be there
I am not turning numb
Numbness is still a sensation
I am no longer letting any emotions reside in me at all
It will be better for you won’t it?
Mercy in a HeartbeatMy eyes are shut,Mercy in a Heartbeat in Free Verse More Like This
As my body drifts on weightless clouds
Letting my brain know I lay unconscious,
Drifting into a land of dreams…
Is that an angel?
No, I think not
I am surrounded by a swirling black cloud
Just out of my reach is a paved road
But I am covered,
The darkness is engulfing me
I have heard of the heavens, earth, & fiery hell
But I do not know the Creator personally
I see red through the evil penetrating my soul
Pale beauty stands before me
I am cautious so I do not move
But now her hand is extended,
A look of understanding & comfort,
Masks the features of a knowing face
My fingers twitch,
Itching for a knowledge root
My arm moves towards her slowly,
A smile begins to form on her face,
Happy at my feeble attempts
Suddenly filled with energy,
I snap back,
Into evil presence
I see her follow me,
She takes ahold of my hand on her own,
I keep my face away,
Scared of reaction,
Of the feeling of love
Of light in darkness
HeldIf life was actually only our dreamsHeld in Free Verse More Like This
And in our dreams; reality wasn’t based off society
And society simply didn’t exist
Wouldn’t our “lives” hold so much more?
Rebellion ContagionAgainst all standards of society shall weRebellion Contagion in Free Verse More Like This
The “rules” of our world
Who says it cannot be?
Go for something
That your heart craves to receive
Do not hold back
You may be surprised at the result
For its own special reason
You may know the answer
Maybe in a year
Maybe before death takes its toll
But everything happens
For a reason
Take a breath
Breathe in the reliever of honesty
Rebel with me
When the Clock is TickingGrowl…When the Clock is Ticking in Free Verse More Like This
SunkenI sense my own powerful desireSunken in Free Verse More Like This
To know what your purpose is
In treating me the way you choose
I spiral down from the seat
I once had been placed in
Wishing to shed this earthly dirt
I’m trying to remove the soil
That buries my despairing hope
Only more piles on me
Halting my weak attempts
Strength had vanished from my bones so long ago
Leaving physical endurance a mere once upon a time
There is no space
That would allow me to make movement
I am confined to a state of intense aversion
My lungs have quit
Both deflated, shriveled, pieces of nothingness
No kindness to grant me new air
Do not fail to remember
You are the reason
For my asphyxiation
Are your actions an increasing result
Of my precise accusations towards your descendant?
As he almost became rightly labeled as an offender….
The label never occurred
Leaving me with stares from others
Claiming me to be a mythomaniac
Your significant other assists you
In the telling of false statements directed at me
Creating a crowd
Surfacing Air....Bondage to creation mounts itself upon my backSurfacing Air.... in Free Verse More Like This
Not Holy creation,
But the creation of a ticking bomb,
Ready to explode when Satan’s call has been answered
My eyes remain tightly shut as I feel the weight shift
I can tell the time is coming soon
I have exploded into fiery fits of despair before-
But not like the one that remains,
Getting heavier with each breath flowing through my tiring lungs
I revive into a lighter mood,
And push away a painful past
I let my mind drift away into paradise
I felt so overwhelmed by the peace at hand
Only the love from the close ones around me
And the Father up above,
Could leave me with such a light & hopeful feeling
I never tore the bomb off my back,
For it was created by the Enemy
He would not let me grasp it in desperate, clawing hands
So I ignored the dreaded day
I knew it was to come soon,
But who said it would be today?
I am now sunken,
In an ocean of eternal pity
Environment worsens itself,
Included with the pain already felt inside my withe
These Things So SmallThese things she wishes to screamThese Things So Small in Free Verse More Like This
They get bigger & fiercer underneath her all too thin skin
It’s been stretched too much
And her tears, that have just begun to fall, disintegrate the frail surface
She means only best
But gets the worst in return
Her body has been aching in protest
Yet she is left to fend for herself
To pick up the mess she wishes she did not have to call hers
What is showing in physical sickness
Resembles all too much the battle within walls no one can see through
She is ignored, betrayed, hurt
But no one within reach at night is there to push her through
For they are the ones who claw at her entirety
“Look at me! Look at me!” she cries
But only in her dreams
Because no matter how hard the tears fall
No matter how weak she has become
No matter how broken her heart may be
They only see ugliness
They are gambling with her life!
She is lost & insecure
She is unsure of what lies beneath
They made her believe she is a monster
When truly she is sensitive &
When Dreams Aren't EnoughWhen Dreams Aren't Enough in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
wind and falling leaves
like whispered words that redeem
me and soothe my soul
You're My PoisonI'm dyingYou're My Poison in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
The pain seeps through
Clutching at my heart
Ripping it to shreds,
You merely watch
Pretending you're not the cuase
Seeing me die slowly
Every time you leave me,
But you return
As you always do
Slowly sucking the poison out
That you yourself placed
And i begin to forget,
Just for a moment,
And fall back into love with you again.
And with every kiss
Every time we fuck
Every second i spend loving you,
I feel the poison
Seeping back into my heart
And with everytime you leave me
i begin to die again
While you pretend not to see.
You're the poison and the antitode
My killer and saviour
The reason i want to live
While i slit my wrists,
You're my poison
And my addiction
As i continue to drink you in
And choke you down
Your Poetry SucksYes, roses are redYour Poetry Sucks in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
And violets are blue
But you have to understand
Who said they had to,
Its about imagination
Emotion and orignality
Not the reiteration
Of dead men's practicality
They are your sentence
To a world that has to listen
As you create the difference
Whether it be
With angst poem against love
Or how you set your heart free
To fly like a dove,
For these words
Whether or not they be true
Their beauty and ideals
Will be used to define you,
Hope ,in fact, has feathers
And like a caged bird it sings
But these words will only be tethers
That strip you of your wings,
Those are their words
Meant for their time
And meant for their herds,
But this your time
Meant for your words
And whether they be meaningful, stupid
Or completely absurd
I'm sure they'll be amazing.
sloppy love-poem hammeredwell I could besloppy love-poem hammered in Free Verse More Like This
but there is a
I am just intoxicated
I'm always getting drunk
on things that
metaphorically sloshed on
the snow, the rain,
frank sinatra songs
I got smashed on a swing-set
stabbing the sky
screaming into the
the way you believe
you can fly
for an infinite split-second
that night it was you
hits harder than an
harder than a
fifth of vodka
Spoilers For my Younger SelfI.Spoilers For my Younger Self in Free Verse More Like This
sometimes things will make sense
but mostly they won't
and one night
when the maps give you open wounds instead of
you will sit motionless in a parked car
baptized with safety instead of
you will wield smiles like fishhooks,
contagious and sharp
waste yourself on
you will kiss a man
who tilts your chin
and touches you slow
you will spend your whole life waiting
for something to hit you hard enough to make you
feel like you have
spent thirty years in a broom closet
you will live night daily
waiting for the sunrise
and occasionally dancing
for the stars
untitledall of my beginningsuntitled in Free Verse More Like This
look like thin slices of
dust motes streaming in my
give me an
let this sunset fire
scream a wild death
I will trace your road map
looking for nothing but an
it's the journey
it's the flight not the crash
(it's the flight
it's the charred wings
it's the teeth of a night intoxicated
with a hunger we can never quite
no investmentsevery muffledno investments in Free Verse More Like This
“are you home yet?”
whispered to myself
begs a new set of limbs
to be my first and final confessional booth
my inhibitions stutter-sweep what needs to be said into
a wary circling
this is my violence, my stunted
to let my fears crash through the atmosphere
like a nightwinged anything,
exhilaration between my teeth, clutching at the horizon
I may never be reckless enough
to trust you enough
to let you carry my past
Culture shockSometimes restaurants are reallyCulture shock in Free Verse More Like This
hit me like an ax to the
I want you to know I am
adding your name
to the list of people
I am not allowed to fall in
I want you to know that
I didn't after all, I was
mood swingsthese are the accumulations, the teeth ofmood swings in Free Verse More Like This
my downward spiral, a
double helix of
everything I am unable to mutate out of
I am jealous of the birds
for their escape artist exit strategies
(my roots aren't even deep enough to
hold me upright.) You had a nightmare,
you tell me, where I was thirsty and you
offered me water that killed me when I drank it
I am surprised and pleased to find a metaphor that
finally makes sense
WaxI learned to fly in a cageWax in Free Verse More Like This
when I managed to
take to the atmosphere
I know I must have seemed
something like a feathered candle to you,
about to ignite. I caught the fear making you thinner,
exposing your deepest bones, but I
was discovering how to fall in mad love with the
sky, and that's where we
over a decade ago before any of that
you used to whistle to the
birds while my wide eyes
witnessed the answer-back
miracle. It's a shame my flighted
language couldn't steal a song from your
throat, metaphorical or otherwise. It's a shame
it took my broken wings
to splint you back to whole
manifestosand there you aremanifestos in Free Verse More Like This
unconventional enough to
resuscitate my heart
the way you make me feel at least
13 years younger is
uncontrollable, manifested in
how I show you my art like
maybe you'll tape it to your fridge
I dig so hard
the way you hold adjectives and nouns
mangle them up and sew them together
in a colorful mass of
and I'm in constant
everything you do hits me hard enough to
shatter my communication skills
inhibitions and (oh now)
I'm a greedy child,
only three words saturating
gateway drugshere's to the dirty-wingedgateway drugs in Free Verse More Like This
out on corners
praying for cigarettes
I started believing in God
the moment I caught you
with your halo fully exposed
rocking a smile like the
do not resuscitateI've been waiting threedo not resuscitate in Free Verse More Like This
for your skin to soften into something
I can recognize
counting your edges when the tea is cold
with your frostbite
spoon-feeding forgetfulness to your grudge-
child when you are too hungover to
sharpen your claws
I have been waiting three suspected counts of arson
for the ashes to give you back to me
I am the WriterI am a protagonist,I am the Writer in Concrete Poetry More Like This
A minor supporting character
I am the investigator,
The prophetic narrator
I am your hero
Your forgotten sidekick
I am the writer
Day NineI don’t know whichDay Nine in Free Verse More Like This
I’m more afraid of:
breaking your heart,
or finding that you don’t
even have a heart to break.
Day ThirteenI lost you long ago—Day Thirteen in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
when you looked into my eyes
and saw someone else.
Day NineteenI.Day Nineteen in Free Verse More Like This
This building will always
remind me of you.
You left your presence
in its walls and
it creaks like a
I hear you have a
I’ll never know if
it’s a he or she,
and that is surprisingly okay.
You are every cyclist
wearing aviator sunglasses,
which means that I see you,
six times on my way home.
that is the same number
of times that my heart stops
I have a friend with
the same name as you, it
feels weird saying it
I’ve written you
pages of poems,
hoping that your memory
will bleed from my fingers
like a pen
running out of ink.
The results of
this test are
Day TwelveI joked about killing myselfDay Twelve in Free Verse More Like This
seven times today:
Four times in the morning,
twice in the afternoon,
and once on the bus when I
didn’t think anyone could hear.
funeral is on Sunday, and I
can feel the base in my
There are no roots to
the left of me,
and the right is
barely hanging on.
No one told me that trees
die from the bottom up.
2012January2012 in Free Verse More Like This
I had my heart broken
every time they clasped hands.
The man in the
made me feel
like I was important
just for a moment.
I wrote a story that
It blew my head up
like a red balloon.
I nursed the
from two months before
it beat in a different chest.
I must have slept
through all 31 days
because I can't
My heart was squeezed
through unknowing fingers
and when I finally allowed it
it wanted to stay.
I cut my hair to my shoulders.
I tried to find my
and did not succeed.
I learned that I did not have to
wait until I deserved my happy ending.
I spent the longest day of my life
watching the sunrise swallow the stars
with the fastest friends I have ever made.
I wrote more stories in a month
than I had in the previous 365 days.
I tried to observe the world,
but found my perspective was limited.
I can no longer have
Day EightI used wishes likeDay Eight in Free Verse More Like This
to get from one day to
11:11’s and starlight, starbrights.
I’ve found I don’t
need them anymore, darling.
I bridge the 24 hour gap
holding your hand
and tracing constellations
over the space of your skin.
Day SixteenA woman played with her babyDay Sixteen in Free Verse More Like This
across the street from a policeman
holding the biggest gun I
have seen in my life.
Today, I played tourist in
my own city
and I saw that grass grows
the same way
on any side.
Changes Due"See the way the top of the building blinks?" he asks, pausing to breathe some warmth into his stiff fingers.Changes Due in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
"Steady blue, clear view.
Flashing blue, changes due.
Steady red, rain ahead.
Flashing red, snow instead."
We stand beneath Boston's skyline, the February sky spite hard, tiny flakes that don't even feel like snow at us. I begin to wonder if we are trapped inside a snow globe of the city, as if someone bumped the one that I bought for my grandmother when I moved here.
"Changes due, what does that mean?"
He shrugs back at me, "The guy who wrote it probably just needed something to rhyme with blue."
I pull my hands from my coat pockets and press them to his cheeks as I think of all the things that rhyme with blue.
Glue. Flu. Queue. Askew.
The color returns to his cheeks as he places his hands on top of mine
"What would I do without you?"
Hue. Screw. Through. Dew.
"Do you want to go to Starbucks?" he continues. "I think you need something warm."
I nod as he t
Day FourteenMy grandmother was planning aDay Fourteen in Free Verse More Like This
in her free periods during her senior year.
A picket fence, a baby on the way,
the real American Dream.
My mother rang the wedding bells
just after she tossed
her University’s graduation cap.
Why take a hop when you can leap?
My family puts a special emphasis
on the word “friend” if he’s male,
parading a ghost of a figure around
as if I have
achieved the medal of adulthood to
wrap around my finger and say
“I do” because
just isn’t an option.