Growing Around - Pilot (Draft 2)Growing Around - Pilot (Draft 2) in Comedy More Like This
[Scene: Linda and Robert are walking home. A school bus full of adults is riding off behind them. Linda and Robert each have backpacks on]
Robert: How'd you do on the test today?
Linda: Look for yourself. [She hands Robert the page]
Robert: Wow [looks at it disbelief] How do you not know how to make a water balloon?
Linda: Seriously, when are we ever going to use this stuff? Let's just get home. I've got to make a phone call to Janet.
Robert: You need to start thinking about the consequences. These bad grades are really starting to pile up.
[They reach the stairs]
Linda: Look, I've had a hard day. I just want to relax. I'll deal with my grades later.
[They open the door and enter the house. Sally is on the couch playing a video game. Linda runs upstairs towards her room. Robert walks towards the kitchen]
Sally: Where are you going?
Robert: To the kitchen to do my homework. I want to just get it out of the way.
Sally: Oh no you don't mister!
Robert: D-did I do something wrong?
Growing Around - Episodes - A Tale of Two Kiddies[We open to see Linda distracted in class, typing on her cellphone]Growing Around - Episodes - A Tale of Two Kiddies in Comedy More Like This
Linda: Huh, so that's what's going on around the world. I hope things calm down in the—
[She's knocked back by a spitball]
Linda: AGH! Who did that?
[She looks up to see Kathy, staring angrily at her with her arms folded and a straw in one of her hands.]
Kathy: The only place in the world you should be worrying about right now is my classroom.
Linda: Hey! I'm paying attention.
Kathy: Oh really? Then tell me what color crayon Jimmy Stitch used to sign the Ice Cream Proclamation?
Linda: Um.... green?
[Kathy raises one eyebrow]
[She looks over to Robert, who is looking kind of embarrased for her. It's clear that Linda has falling into one of Kathy's traps]
Kathy: Linda, if you were paying attention you'd know that's not what we're learning about today.
Linda: Oh come on, you've got to give me a chance!
[Kathy is heading back to her desk. She doesn't even turn around]
Kathy: Alright, you can be th
Growing Around - PilotGrowing Around - Pilot in Comedy More Like This
[Robert playing video games]
Sally: Uh, Robert why are you still playing that video game?
Robert: Because it's fun.
Sally: Why don't you go outside and do something else. Are you really going to spend all weekend doing this?
Robert: I don't see why not.
Sally: Well, maybe I want to play.
Robert: Ugh, can I please finish this level?
[Sally looks at the screen and sees Robert failing at beating a boss]
Sally: Up, left, perry, thrust.
Robert: I think I know what I'm doing.
[Loses a life. In frustration, Sally takes the controller]
Sally: Come on, come on.
[Sally beats the boss, and sticks out her tongue at Robert]
Robert: Okay, fine. Can I have the controller back now?
Robert: Why not?
Sally: It's my turn now.
Sally: Ugh. Alright, but if you die again I'm going to own you in multiplayer.
Sally: I'm coming! I'm coming!
[Sally trips over one of Linda's possessions while Robert is playing a video game in the background]
Growing Around - Episodes - Best Enemies[We open up to see Sally standing in front of a three-story building. She's looking up at her car, which has somehow gotten up on the roof. She's in the city part of town.]Growing Around - Episodes - Best Enemies in Comedy More Like This
Sally: Well... this is some way to start a day. How am I supposed to get that down before the candy sale ends?
[A child in a police officer's uniform walks up to her]
Officer: So, that's your car up there?
Sally: [Still looking at the car] Yeah, wanna help me get it down?
Officer: I'm placing you under arrest.
[We see that Sally's been handcuffed]
Sally: Hey, that's not fair! I get my car stuck on rooftops all the time and you guys never seem to mind!
Officer: Well, you usually don't run through six buildings, two parks, and a subway train when you do. I hope.
[We cut to a panning shot of a bunch of mayhem that Sally's destruction has caused]
Sally: Um... it wasn't me...?
Officer: Tell it to the judge.
[We gilligan cut to the court room.]
Sally's lawyer: I told you, the "it wasn't me" defense never wo
Hope and Expecations: Part 2I must admit, sleeping alone is not as cool as it once was. Sure you have all the room you need to yourself on the bed, but once you have a wife, things feel so empty when she is away. For three full nights I was alone without Marge while she was in the hospital after giving birth to our second child Lisa. At first I thought the idea was great, more room for me for a few days, but then on the first night as I lay there, I realized I had no one to hold on to. It's definitely a crushing experience, and I hope nothing horrible ever happens to Marge because you never realize how much you miss your wife until they leave you for a while.Hope and Expecations: Part 2 in Drama More Like This
But the loneliness is gone for the moment, thank God. Marge came home this afternoon with Lisa in tow. She is a darling little thing, so tiny and so innocent, unlike Bart who had the mischievous look in his eyes the minute he burst from the womb. Of course, looks can be deceiving; maybe she is hiding it for a few months before she shows her true colors. Or m
Hope and Expectations: MaggiePork chop night, a night that is rarely missed by my family, mainly because Homer claims I make them to perfection. The kids love it too, they say that the slices of meat are tender enough to make it extremely juicy and delicious, there is rarely any fat, and if there is, it's just scooted aside to be thrown away later or given to the cat who seems to enjoy it. No one complains, they eat it with vigor and compliment me on another delicious night of pork chops, along with a scoop of apple sauce that disappears as quickly as the pork chops. It's something I always enjoy making for them; I always prepare them with love and care even on nights like tonight.Hope and Expectations: Maggie in General Fiction More Like This
Of course tonight I knew things would not go well, I knew it the moment I walked into the supermarket and had to buy a new brand of pork chops that were cheaper due to the financial situation we are in now. Homer decided to change jobs; he wanted his dream job working as a pin monkey at a local bowling alley. He had wanted to do this fo
Hope and Expectations: Chapter 5, Life Ruined?"So you've ruined your life"Hope and Expectations: Chapter 5, Life Ruined? in General Fiction More Like This
I kept staring at those words on the pamphlet Dr. Hibbert gave me after he announced I was pregnant. I am not ready for this, not at all. It felt like a stone had fallen into the pit of my stomach, and I wanted to throw up. But I knew it was only the baby that was inside, the one that had given me morning sickness for the past few weeks, the one that was now ruining my life. I could not believe I had let myself stoop so low with Homer the night we joined the castle club. Granted I love him dearly, but I don't think we are actually ready for this.
We don't have the right jobs for us to take care of this child; I still live with my mother and my sisters. Homer lives on his own, but how much can he do for me when he barely even finished high school? If I got a new job, it wouldn't be for very long, I would have to take care of the baby. I can't ask my mother for money, she has my sisters to take care of. So what should I do?
I'm so upset and thinking so hard a
Simpsons:Hope and ExpectationsIt's two A.M.Simpsons:Hope and Expectations in Short Stories More Like This
Even though I've been working through eight hour shifts for the past three days and feel exhausted, I just can't sleep. My mind is racing with thoughts about what I have put myself through, and most importantly what Marge has gone through. I keep thinking if I did the right thing by marrying her, I love her to death but I can't believe I went as far as to get her pregnant. I mean it's great that I will soon be a Dad, but will I be a good provider for him?
Working these eight hour shifts have been long and tedious, flipping burgers is not my idea of fun, and neither is sitting by the drive through waiting for some low life to show up and ask for a meal. They always want something special on that meal, extra mayo, no onions, can the hamburger have no meat in it, that of course it not possible, but I just humor them and give them a fake smile when they come up to the window. And I do it all for Marge.
I miss her so much right now, but I really don't deserve her, not a bum li
Coraline: Perfect little girlPerfect little girlCoraline: Perfect little girl in Fan Fiction More Like This
The Beldam was hunched over the old worn table inside her private workshop, her equipment scattered about the table. Her appearance once again resembled that of Mel Jones but still tall and grotesque, much to most peoples horror.
Standing in the open doorway of the workshop was a young girl with blue hair in a dark blue star sweater. It looked like Coraline Jones? No, this was not the same Michigan girl whom defeated the Beldam only months ago. Coraline was not missing an arm, a leg, an eye patch or even had a black button eye.
What is it, Coraline? The Beldam asked the badly damaged and dishevelled Coraline look-alike with great annoyance, not turning around to face her. Cant you see that Im a little busy here, daughter?
Mother youve been in here for days. When will you come out?
The Beldam responded sharply, looking over her shoulder at Coraline,
Coraline: Spoiled BratCoralineCoraline: Spoiled Brat in Fan Fiction More Like This
Other Coraline 2s face was flushed red with frustration as the Other Mother, or better yet known as the Beldam entered the room.
Other Coraline 2 looked the weight of a baby killer whale! Her enormous stomach stuck out like she was 6-7 months pregnant, stretching the fabric of her dark blue star sweater. Her pudgey arms were thick and round like logs; her hips were massive and her backside jiggled around as if it were stuffed to the brim with fruit jelly. In place of her eyes were two large black buttons.
The Other Mother once again looked like the slender, curvy and overall beautified version of Mel Jones only with button eyes and wearing a silk black dress with white polka-dots.
"What is it sweetie pie pumpkin?" she responded in a syrupy voice.
Other Coraline 2 sat on the floor of the other worlds living room, looking miserably down at the empty pink box of chocolate bunnies. "It's just that I
Coraline: Christmas shoppingCoralineCoraline: Christmas shopping in Fan Fiction More Like This
In Ashland, Oregon, USA, the date had reached December 12 2009. Christmas time was nearing and the people of Ashland were already flooding the shopping malls, trying to get to Christmas shopping done quickly, if possible. And amongst the hundreds upon hundreds of families that had come to shop were the Joneses
Coraline Jones walked down the aisle of the toy department of the store called 'Expensive Useless Junk'. Her parents, Mel and Charlie Jones was currently shopping for Christmas presents for the families' relatives in Germany. Mel told Coraline to go look at whatever she wanted her to her get for Christmas.
"Hmmm " Coraline hummed to herself as she looked over the aisle at the countless selection of dolls and action figures. None of them interested her in the slightest, especially all the Barbie dolls that you could not turn your head without seeing. She was well passed the stage of dolls at ele
Chapter Three- Stepping StonesChapter Three- Stepping StonesChapter Three- Stepping Stones in General Fiction More Like This
Hailkit stood by Mistystar’s side, head held high as she gazed down at her Clanmates. Finally, she was a warrior. Finally she could prove herself to everyone. Finally she could help her Clan.
She pricked her ears as she heard the beginnings of a chant. Her Clan was chanting her warrior name, recognizing her noble actions, “Stormkit, Stormkit, Stormkit,” They chanted, eyes only on her older brother. He roared and strutted, gaining nothing but admiration and the continued chant, “STORMKIT! STORMKIT! STORMKIT!”
Hailkit tried to mrow out her grief, tried to step up so they could see her, but she was trapped in Stormkit’s sha
Storm- Chapter OneChapter One- A SwimStorm- Chapter One in General Fiction More Like This
“Thunderkit!” Thunderkit woke to the ever-present whine of his littermate’s voice. He tried to ignore it, snuggling closer to the warm fur of his mother. On one side was the comfort and softness that only Icewing could bring. On the other, there was only a stale breeze and the nagging feeling he could be attacked at any time. Sure enough, a few seconds after his name was called, a paw found its way into his side, “Come on, Thunderkit! Get up! We wanna play!”
The tiny tom just squeezed his eyes tighter closed and pressed further into his mother’s pelt. There was no way he would let anyone shake him out of a perfectly good cat-nap. Fearing another jab, he mewed sleepily, “No. Play without me. I wanna sleep!”
“Come on Stormkit, leave hi
Storm- Chapter TwoChapter Two- Lightning StrikesStorm- Chapter Two in General Fiction More Like This
Thunder crashed once more from outside and Hailkit let out the loudest mew yet, snuggling close to her mother so only the tops of her ears could be seen. It had been raining since morning, a heavy storm circuit that darkened the sky and stirred the air. Rain was coming down in sheets, softening the soil and washing it down towards the lake. It was the second biggest storm of Thunderkit’s young life, the first being the one in which the kits had been born.
Thunderkit was fascinated by it. The streaks of light shooting across the sky, thin claw scratches that faded before he could blink. Endless water spraying from dark, threatening clouds. The smell of life and renewal seeping through the air. It was, he decided, beautiful. His favorite part of this otherwise unbearable s
What If She Stayed?What If She Stayed?What If She Stayed? in Fan Fiction More Like This
I remember perfectly the day she was born.
It was cold and dark outside. When I first saw her, I remember thinking, "Oh my god. Is she really mine?" She had the most beautiful brown eyes that were always taking in everything since she was only a few minutes old. Right from the start she was always moving and observing things and loved blabbing in that adorable baby-talk.
She smiled and reached up to me and gave this tiny, happy cry. It was surreal for me. Unbelievable, really. I was afraid, though. What if this was all a dream? I didn't want to wake up, but then I realized it wasn't a dream. It was real life, and I was truly relieved and overjoyed.
Charlie and I thought about naming her Caroline at least that's what we agreed on before she was born. But it just didn't seem special enough, you know? So, finally, I had it. Coraline. C-O-R-A-L-I-N-E. I thought of it myself! I just switched the vowels and we had the perfect name for ou
Wybie and CatWybie Lovat was running around the house after his grandma, desperately pleading as he did so. Wybie was seven years old and just begging for a pet, but his grandma refused him every time.Wybie and Cat in Fan Fiction More Like This
Wyborne, how many times have I told you, were not getting a pet! she told him sternly.
But gramma! the seven-year-old protested. Everyone in the first grade has a pet! Im not asking for a dog or anything, I just want something! Im the only one! His lower lip quivered and his eyes widen to the fullest extent that they possibly could.
Ms. Lovat turned around and sighed. Wyborne, Im sorry. she murmured as she crouched down and put her hand on her grandsons shoulder. I just dont have time to help you care for a pet.
Wybie frowned. But Ill take care of it! You dont have to do a thing except help me pay for food and stuff! he promised as he began to hop excited
kiki601's Christmas presentSoft Christmas music played through the house as Maddie hung up another part of the string of tinsel she had wrapped around her arm. As she put up the red glittery tinsel, she couldn't help but think about the holiday. She had been asked countless times what she wanted and she did give the people that asked a list. However, it wasn't a complete list since there was one more thing she wanted that she wouldn't get. Well someone would be more accurate.kiki601's Christmas present in Romance More Like This
"And that was a classic we all know and love," The overly cherry DJ on the radio announced, making her smile lightly at how forced it all sounded.
"Next up we have a new song that people keep asking for, so to keep them quiet here it is," That line made her laugh out loud as she finished putting up the red tinsel and grabbing the silver and heading to another wall.
The song that started playing was one of those remakes of a old, good song that wasn't all that bad. She had got three half
The Darry that stole Christmas"Deck the halls with boughs of holly," Pony's voice rang through the living room as he hung up another Christmas bulb.The Darry that stole Christmas in Humor More Like This
"Fa la la la la, la la la la," Soda finished for him, stringing up tinsel around the big front window.
"Tis the season to be jolly,"
"Fa la la la la, la la la la,"
"Don we now," Pony started but was interrupted by a groan from Darry who came out of the kitchen.
"Will you two please stop singing, its bad enough your making our house look like something from a bad TV Christmas special, but singing too,"
The two younger Curtis's looked at each other then started snickering.
"Bah humbug," Darry muttered, in a sarcastic manner.
"Come on Darry, get into the spirit of things,"
"No," And the older male walked back into the kitchen.
Pony and Soda just kind of shrugged and went back to putting up the decorations. When they were done dinner was just about ready, so Darry walked back into the living room.
"Well what do you think?" Soda asked, coming to stand on one side
To Who?Summary: A Family Guy (kind of anti-)fanfic. When karma strikes members of the Griffin family, they know just who to turn to in their times of need. Well kind of, anyway. One-shot.To Who? in Fan Fiction More Like This
To My Loving Daughter,
Hey, honey! Remember me? It's your daddy! Yeah...anyway, it's been a long time since we've seen each other, so I just thought I'd write. Oh, and you know, while I have you, I was wondering if you could send along a little money for Daddy? Daddy's special hospital bills are kind of steep, and the doctors are getting a little mad 'cause the Social Security won't cover everything. I try to tell 'em that I don't need to be here, but after Daddy's last little "accident," the judge just won't believe I can manage things on my own without your mother around. (And that stupid chicken's fuckin' Jew lawyer isn't make things any easier, let me tell you. Er, um, no offense to you and your new
50 Words of Barch and O'NeillSummary: A Daria fanfic. Do you know what the world needs? More ONeill/Barch fics. Here are fifty super-short ones. Some sexual references.50 Words of Barch and O'Neill in Romance More Like This
As long as they kept their relationship fun, casual and kinky, Janet could pretend that she wasn't falling back into the pattern that led to her first marriage, divorce and heartbreak.
Then one day, without even meaning to, she accidentally used the 'L' word...
"I hate Mondays." To most people it was an innocuous statement, but somehow Janet was the only one he could admit hating anything to.
They had both been in pain once, for different reasons and at different points in their lives. They had simply dealt with it by following completely opposite paths.
Deep down, Janet was overjoyed there was at least one man who still found her attractive. (The rest, of course, were just shallow pigs who couldn't appreciate the allure of a mature, experie
Coraline - Midnight Talk"Coraline?"Coraline - Midnight Talk in General Fiction More Like This
Mel wandered aimlessly in the dark atmosphere. There were no walls or floors - just a spacious black void that made chills run up her spine. This was more than unsettling. She was also alone. She had been calling out her husband and daughter's names for a while now. How long, she didn't know. But there had been no responses from anyone. This "place" was also noiseless, and with each passing second of utter silence, fear crept its way deeper into her heart.
"Coraline! Charlie!" she called, becoming frantic. "Where are you guys?!"
Again, there was no response.
The dark-haired woman stopped, allowing herself a moment to pause and think calmly. She placed a hand to her temple, realizing that her heavy breathing was causing her to become lightheaded. When her brain had stopped pulsating, she finally heard it. It was faint, but after ambling idly for so long (or what it seemed to be) in complete silence, her ears where suddenly well equipped to pick up the most muted s
Coraline - Mother's Day"A little red, for the heart...and a little green for a few swirls," Coraline Jones dictated as she drew on a piece of white construction paper. She was in her room at her desk putting the finishing touches on her Mother's Day card.Coraline - Mother's Day in Fan Fiction More Like This
"There," she said in a satisfied tone. She held the finished card in the air to examine it properly, "what do you think?"
Coraline's best friend, Wybie Lovat, sat on her bed with Cat on his lap. He looked over the card and then nodded his head in approval.
"Looks great, Jonesy. Your mom's gonna love it!"
"Hope so, I worked really hard on it. I even made it so it opens like a pop-up book, see..." she ventured as she quickly demonstrated the function of her card. It was a rather pretty card with long, green swirls and a giant red heart in the middle.
Coraline smiled dearly at her hand-made creation and then skidded to her bedroom door.
"C'mon, Wybourne, let's go see the look on her face when she sees this beauty!"
"Sure," agreed Wybie as he carried the blac
Craig Hoffman Stalks Meg?June 10th (night before performance at the Showplace Arena)...Craig Hoffman Stalks Meg? in Fantasy More Like This
The Griffin family arrive at an Executive Inn and Suites hotel around 3:00 in the morning, tired, exhausted, but happy because they delivered the most electrifying and outstanding performance of a lifetime. Their tour bus pulls up outside of the Executive Inn and Suites parking lot. Luckily, everyone is asleep and there is no commotion
or crowd to mob the the family. Chris carries his Gibson Les Paul guitar in with him, because like Dethklok's Skwisgaar Skwigelf, Chris plays random guitar chords like
there's no tomorrow, and at 15 years old, Chris can play like a pro...
Lois: "Okay, kids, you wait here while I go get our room."
Chris: "Boy, I hope we're right next to the swimming pool!"
Stewie: "Oh God, yes, last time we went to get a room, we had to drive off because it was ransacked and there were two dead people in the floor of the shower..."
(What-if sequence referencing Rob Zombie's "The Devil's Rejects..." Stewie come
Meg Griffin Called To BattleAfter recording "Diamond Sword", Meg decides to go to the Quahog Medieval Times with her brother Chris and her mom Lois to relax and enjoy a great show of sword fights, dragon slayings, jousting, epic battles, and a fresh hot dinner. What else could be better? She has had enough of Connie Dimico and her friends giving her (Meg) a hard time, and being ignored by school bad boy Craig Hoffman, who still doesn't find Meg attractive enough even though she's sporting heavy metal garbs. Tonight, Meg is sporting a beautiful sleeveless shirt with a male knight holding a sword up to the sky, standing amidst the foreground of a dragon breathing fire, black leather pants, and boots. She is looking beautiful! Little does Meg know that her awesome Progressive Metal songs that she has sung will earn her a special spot in Medieval Times...Meg Griffin Called To Battle in Fan Fiction More Like This
Lois: "I didn't think it was possible, but after Medieval Times listened to your song, they invited you here personally! Oh, Meg, I'm so proud of you."