Blue eyesAt the time I didnt know how something that was supposed to complete you left you feeling so bereaved, as if you had lost someone unspeakably important to you. Who did I lose? Myself, of course, but the illusion of love had blinded me so I couldnt see that I was slowly disappearing, as was every aspect of me with it.Blue eyes in Scraps More Like This
Love is either a deep, boundless lake or a lie- like those pools of water that seem endless but are only dyed to deceive you. The only way to tell the difference is to jump in.
Ive been thinking- what would you think if I started coming back into the music industry, Hisoka-kun? I asked, simultaneously scribbling some notes on a spare sheet of paper. I was not composing some complex piece; rather, I was mulling over a melody in my head that had come to me in a dream.
Coming back? Oh, right, you were a singer once. I forgot, he replied, not bothering to glance up at me from a novel.
I huffed and crossed my arms, shifting in my
Things unseen ch. 7 - WIPOver the next few months, I had to ask myself one question: Why the hell wasnt that little child prodigy (Artemis-Akira Stratford) completely insane?Things unseen ch. 7 - WIP in Scraps More Like This
In case youre wondering what spurred this question
Well, I took it upon myself to learn how to play piano. Why? Its one of those unjustifiable things, I suppose. It was maddening, really- screw ups left and right, and the overwhelming feeling of wanting to grab a chainsaw and hack the piano to pieces. A few months of playing drove me over the edge- so how did a few years of playing leave him unaffected?
Still, I learned. It wasnt the sort of talent that belonged at the prestigious school, but at least no one could say I couldnt play at all. What I could do, in fact, was sing but for some reason, I forbade myself to do it. Maybe I was used to this role of the girl that no one noticed, and knew that it was easier than being in the spotlight. I had fallen into a niche that was like quicksand- the mor
Chapter seven- Memory I couldn't believe it.Chapter seven- Memory in Scraps More Like This
I had set out to kill him- but it appeared as if I was the one who was going to die. Why here? Why now?
I had always wanted to die at the side of my true love, or something clichéd like that. In my mind, I had a more clear definition of how I didnt want to die than how I did- I never wanted to die at the hands of someone I hated. Maybe it was pride.
An overwhelming feeling of hopelessness eclipsed the anger, and I was sure I would start crying.
I would never see Artemis again, I wouldnt get the chance to say goodbye.
I could never look out a window on a rainy day,
I could never know the feeling of winning an award for my music, could never know the joy of being a parent. Instead of my life flashing before my eyes, all the things I never had did- what an awful, awful way to die.
A part of me almost began to smile- at least I knew everything now. At least I didnt die a fool.
I looked up to see what I thought would be the last thing I
Chapter five- CollapseIt was beginning to look like I was going insane. Thinking about what Id just done, I stared at myself in the mirror- it was becoming harder and harder to hide. The more I killed, the more I seemed to become hollow and my body began to collapse in on itself; my skin turned back to that sick pale, my clothes were too big, almost as if I was shrinking and becoming lost in them. I smiled a bitter smile and began to wonder: how long would it take everyone to catch on? Would there be one of those interventions? It would be useless, because this wasnt my fault. Something was sapping everything that was me, weakening me. My father had said kill or be killed but what the act of killing was killing me?Chapter five- Collapse in Scraps More Like This
Oh, you want me to go on a poetic rant about how it washes away everything and leaves the world clean and new? Thats bullshit, for one. Two, poetry is mostly bullshit.
But anyway, even as I sat on a windowsill, window open, watching