Locked in my mindThe rest of them aren't perfect,Locked in my mind in Free Verse More Like This
But you are,
You never change.
You're always there,
If someone had told me then
How it would all end
I'd have done better.
But who knew it'd be
I remember talking to you,
They tell me I was wasting my time,
Talking to someone who will never talk back.
Someone who will never touch me
Or hold me, or dry my tears
Or kiss me.
That's all I want,
But they say it'll never happen
You're locked in my head.
A glass wall impossible to cross
I can see you
I can almost feel you...
But we'll never be.
And I love you,
How can they say I don't?
I need you, don't go!
They pull me away
I need you, you're the only one who understands
You visit me in my sleep.
Carrying me to the dream world
How can they say you're not here?
That you're not real,
That you don't exist,
Even though you sit taunting?
I love you.
If only you could be here,
Away from your prison,
Where you'll never
You're still goneThey say life is very short,You're still gone in Free Verse More Like This
But without you,
It feels like five lifetimes.
Though I can feel you near,
You'll never again
How does death become you?
Has heaven provided
For you well?
Not that I'd know it,
But I think if he is there with you
He's been cared for as well.
It seems so unfair
He gets an eternity,
I get a lock of hair.
I still love you,
Darling, don't doubt it,
Especially now that it is night.
I look around
I can almost see you
In the moonlight.
I reach out to hold you close,
But as it is,
You're naught but a ghost.
It's hard to breathe with
This knife your death
Has left in my chest.
If I close my eyes
I can see you swirling, happy
In that evening dress.
I still have it at home,
But without your warmth
Don't fret for me dearest,
I know I'll see you again
But until then,
I've nothing but moonlight,
And you're still gone.
- Your dearest Edmund, 1938
Dark Angel's WingsIf I fell through the clouds,Dark Angel's Wings in Free Verse More Like This
Would you stay, if only to watch me bleed more?
If I could leave you,
Would you cry and beg me to stay?
If I wasn't so foolish
Could we be?
If I could stop thinking about you
Would you start thinking about me?
But now I see as I look into your deceiving brown eyes,
You are darkest temptation with no pure intentions.
And I hate you,
I hate what you've done to my soul.
A whirlwind just beginning to pick up,
Is my love not enough?
Is my affection not enough to make you stay?
Dark angel's wings,
More like devil's cloven feet
And sharpened horns,
And a lifetime of hate and love.
Is this what we would have been?
It's too late; you took too long to speak,
Even as you stutter in my mind,
You would never beg me to stay and comfort you.
You are an angel, a real fallen angel,
Not a beautiful, ethereal creature that has lost its way,
But a demon that has flown up to tempt me into my destruction.
And I am salvaging what I can,
Of my devastated hear
DollFor a long timeDoll in Free Verse More Like This
I looked at you
Then reality splashed down
And I almost laughed
Though I really cried
When I saw your eyes.
Your empty, plain,
Generic Barbie doll eyes.
I know I'm not one to judge,
You're so fake,
Not even lies to lean on.
You're a beautiful face
Taped to a balloon
Full of nothing.
If your eyes
With something, anything,
Besides the intake
Of what's going on around you,
You know, a soul,
Maybe it would work.
But I'm sorry, it won't.
I know I'm a living doll myself,
But listen to that word I used.
You're not even dead.
You're just empty.
You never talk or cry or laugh
You have never kissed me back.
Though it hurts to leave
You have no personality
But the one I gave you in my head.
The one where you hold my hand,
And say something other than "okay."
And actually give an opinion.
I almost wish we were arguing
Wouldn't it be better
Than those lifeless, absorbing eyes?
I'm not saying I hate you,
But I know you don't try at all,
Promiscuous girlShe cries every eveningPromiscuous girl in Free Verse More Like This
Sitting on his bed
Not because he hurts
But because they hurt
They act so mean
Because she is free.
She is who she likes,
She does what she wants,
Yet they mar her with their taunts.
All she wants is reassurance.
It's none of their business,
Even if it's not particularly wise.
And in the silence,
She listens for the whispers
Of a thousand regrets.
As the murmurs grow stronger
Into laughter and dark glares
Her eyes are full of sunlight
Her arms ready to hug anyone who needs it
With a never-failing smile.
But underneath her calm façade
She often sobs
But if she didn't really love him, they'd know.
And her friends must watch
As a whirlwind of hate destroys her fragile world
It's none of their business.
Not that they didn't want it to stop,
But it got so bad.
And eventually that promiscuous girl with the loving smile disappeared
Where the taunts couldn't harm her
For a fresh start.
And it wasn't fair because her friends did still car
Bad BloodObserve them sitting thereBad Blood in Free Verse More Like This
Layering on a fresh coat
Hiding their guilt
And ignoring their evil
For polish, they will give away
I am not wholesome
My halo weeps
My arms are held back
Drop, by drop, by drop
Tears of life
Hush, we are pure
An angel fell and broke its wings
I held it with shaking hands and watched
The energy ebb away
A flux in the landscape
God's intervening hand
Or was it the Devil's painted pure?
The angel whimpered, but
I could do not but to hold it
And who to pray to besides the angel itself?
Time ran on
Tears like splotches of ink
And nothing but a vain sentence-
Beware, dear angel, their blood is not good.
Price of BeautyEverybody supports the girls who are down and out,Price of Beauty in Free Verse More Like This
Finished with their luck,
But what about the beautiful girls?
They're so deceptive.
But we just want to live,
We're not after your boyfriend,
Trust me, there's a price to beauty.
We get it every day,
She stole this, she did that,
And did you hear ?
Stop being so mean,
We can't help being who we are,
Just because we were born cute
Doesn't mean we're bitches.
We're equal in soul
As in body
If not more.
You're just as beautiful,
But you won't know it until you wake up,
It doesn't matter what size cup
Or skirt you wear.
I'm so tired of getting stared at,
I just want to be pretty,
It hurts when you know you're beautiful
And no one else cares
Take that into account.
We're not all supermodels
Who said you're not beautiful?
Who made you so insecure,
Wake up and know
There's a downside to everything
Please keep this in mind
Next time you're
Hold me closeI smile constantlyHold me close in Free Verse More Like This
Even when you push me away
I still run back.
As if I've found my comfort zone
But the quiet is a heavy verdict
I'm not ready to be locked out.
Though it's not as if we ever were.
I just want you to hold me,
Hold me close,
Don't let me go.
I'm not ready to be set adrift,
I just need your touch,
Tell me things will be better
The silence is still so numb.
A bandage on a raw spot,
Don't ignore me.
I just need you,
Come closer, don't be shy,
I don't need much.
Just your touch.
I sit here,
Just hold me.
But you can't,
And I understand,
But I don't get it.
Hold me close,
Don't ever let me go again,
Your arms wrapped tight
I shouldn't care,
But I do,
Won't you comfort me?
Please, just move on,
Cross into the light
From where I watch in the dark.
It's so cold where I sit,
I can't feel anymore,
I just want your reassurance,
Just hold me close
If I could flyIf I could flyIf I could fly in Free Verse More Like This
I would stay in the sky all day
Floating around the intricate clouds
With warm sunlight as my robe
And my hair as my flag.
If I could fly
At night I would wander to the atmosphere
Gaze in wonder at the stars
Forget the people below
And let the night wind carry me through.
If I could fly
I wouldn't often come down
I would be liberated from earthly worries
And I wouldn't care about you anymore.
SummertimeThe sunshine shines through evergreen trees,Summertime in Free Verse More Like This
A sunset sparkling on emerald leaves
In the memories of my past.
I've thought about this for a while,
It's undeniable, I don't doubt it.
But I won't go the extra mile.
Instead I'll just tell it as it is,
Like a breeze through an old window,
A memory that will now be his.
Let it be your burden now,
It's not like it's a mystery
Every morning was a fresh one,
Every afternoon a good one,
Every evening an exciting one.
Back when I was the sweetest girl
This half of the world
And I was so naïve about the others.
I cared about you all so much,
You were my best friends,
My one and only.
And video game sprees every night
Phone calls every weekend to get together,
And everything was all right.
The weirdest things set me adrift,
The scent of a grocery store,
The feel of a car turning down a lane.
And a glimpse of an abandoned tennis court,
Like God trying to tell me how good I had it.
But I've gotten the message once too many.
To see it al
broken muse.''I'm only complete with you, angel.''broken muse. in Free Verse More Like This
''And why is that?''
''Because, you're my missing chord in my broken song. You're the missing piece in my heart. I only feel complete when I'm with you.''
''But you shouldn't love me, there's nothing to love.''
''Are we talking about the same person here, baby doll? Because you're everything to me and more. I'm the one who doesn't deserve you. Why don't you ever sing anymore?''
''Because I have nothing left to sing about, I have nothing left in my heart- everything's been taken away. My heart is too numb to feel anything.''
''What if I try and fix you? I miss your voice, angel.''
''You can try all you want, but my voice will always be broken.''
I'm still drowning.He was gone.I'm still drowning. in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
It's been six months since I've seen your face,
and I miss seeing your smile
because your face would always make my heart burst out in a love song
as butterflies swarmed all over my stomach.
Ever since you've been gone,
I found out that I hate looking into oceans
because I keep thinking about how you just drowned your sorrows away,
and your final breath was just so easy.
(A part of me wants to hate you because you never said goodbye to me,
but I know that I'm never strong enough to ever hate you.)
All I have left of you is my burned photograph,
and I still feel like I'm drowning.
Fearless.Girls always say that their ''boys'' are special, handsome, and differentFearless. in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
just because they think they belong to them,
but sometimes girls can be over-dramatic when it comes to love
since they don't want to have a guy that will walk all over their heart
just because he can.
girls try to hard to be beautiful
as they spend hours looking at themselves in the mirror,
experimenting with different makeup and trying out different smiles
just so they can become love experts
and have a guy fall for them
so they don't have to be alone.)
I can honestly say that even between all of the nail-biting and perfume-
I still love you because you've never changed.)
listen to me scream.I promise you there was never anything wrong with you,listen to me scream. in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
it was always me.
I'm sorry for ruining our fairy tale dream,
I would give anything to have you back.
(And the truth is I've been broken since you've left.
I always was the type that wasn't committed into being in a relationship
because I was afraid that I would end up heartless.
But the truth is that I should have believed you
when you said that you were different.)
I used to love your soft kisses
because they always made my heart feel alive again.
You always whispered ''You're beautiful''
in my ear but I never believed you.
(All I would do was laugh to myself.)
I know it's hurting you,
but it's killing me.
All I wanted...My human heartAll I wanted... in Free Verse More Like This
A person to heal it
But nobody seems to care
But then someone suddenly appears
With the wrong intentions
Giving me false hope
You are just like all the rest
You use me
Like a mere toy
And wants to throw me away when I'm no longer useful
But I object
I ask and I beg and I plead
But you do not listen
And just go away
Leaving me behind once again
And here I am
Alone in the darkness
With another piece of my soul broken
Usually been told to do soI used to wish I was dead,Usually been told to do so in Free Verse More Like This
but then I realized,
my pain is gone...
I've had so much pain,
now I don't wish to die,
I'm already somehow dead...
I loved you,
I loved you,
I loved you...
I hate you,
I hate you,
I hate you...
Sometimes I miss you,
the old you...
But then I remember how you hung me dry...
I want to be dramatic,
I want to cry,
but I simply can't...
I can't explain it...
I love you
but I never want you back...
I loved you,
you'll remember throwing it away,
I gave it my best,
I gave it my all...
Trying to be positive,
but there's nothing to be positive about,
nothing at all to smile about...
I want to cry but I can't...
I want to scream but I can't...
I want to sleep and never wake up,
my dreams are much sweeter than reality,
sometimes even more realistic than reality itself...
but my will is dying...
I'm just going to go with the flow,
as I've usually been told to do so...
ThankfulI can admit I've waited,Thankful in Free Verse More Like This
I can admit I've done all I can,
I can admit I loved you with all my heart,
I can admit I always made sure you were happy...
What happened to us?
You left in such a rush...
What do I do now?
Cry and sink to the ground?
You left me for a two bit whore...
You left and I finally got my closure,
it was worth the wait.. the closure...
Sometimes I ask my self why I loved you...
But I guess at some point me and you were true...
It's over now, for good...
And I'm thankful for that...
The Asphalt MelodyThe asphalt imbeddedThe Asphalt Melody in Free Verse More Like This
Into my melody
Chorusing from in to out
He was continual
I was contrasting
A fight for the spotlight
With tempo of abundance
Sweet tire song humming
I sang of nothing but endurance
Delicate tender stroke of the handle
Rushing wind of the asphalt song
Whirling of the soprano
As my melody rested
The asphalt sang baritone
In a thud, it now leaves a mark
The audience witness
A moment in flat
A shrill of pain
A split of divine
The tune it sang
Came to an end
My head split with a beautiful parting gift
Pebbles of quiet but lasting memory
Sweet songs of pain.
Poisonous MemoriesThey call to me with a scent,Poisonous Memories in Free Verse More Like This
Striking a memory to trigger
Lingering in grave silence
Sudden emotion taking over
History repeating in movie version
The mental scars that are left from the past
Like battle wounds of the veterans of war
The memory is crippling
Like a snake bite
A nightmare to relive
That has you in a strong hold.
A whipping to take and no security phrase
A cup of elixir for the wretched
As the memory unfolds
So does the grip on reality
No simple elucidation to this poison
As I sink further into a dream like thought
The further I fall from grace
Slowly being poisoned by
the taunting, haunting and desolate memories of old
Eroded HomeThe day I left the mountain movedEroded Home in Free Verse More Like This
A blown volcano-
one part you
The ash was strewn across the sea-
one part you-
two parts me.
We trampled down the knee high grass
and made a stage
for moth and man
but the earth kept moving,
like a dancers dress
eroding and sinking the populous
The boats collapsed-
fell into the sea
My Latest AttemptThe fish hooks in my skinMy Latest Attempt in Free Verse More Like This
drag the frozen edges of morning closer.
I can't sleep
for gravity's sake
will you let my breathing go
like a kite in a windstorm.
Detach my string from your debate
so I will be carved into the side of a cave
and discovered six hundred years later and framed
off for studying-
isn't that the job of every therapist
and every sick thought that
comes stampeding through my mind
like a boulder crashing through a frozen lake.
DemonsOh how I was captivated by your deep silhouette against mine,Demons in Concrete Poetry More Like This
Under the influence of which we wrote our names in pavement plus forever,
A kind of innocence I couldn't resist, your hooded figure swallowed mine,
I leaned into your shoulder and repressed my shuttering wings,
As you dealt your oxygen for smoke against the abandoned building,
Planting seeds of your fading life in the ground against my desire,
Each time felt like the last time, I'll always remember that lost smile,
And I'll bury those memories six feet under, the demons awaiting their arrival.
Big City DreamsShredding pavement only to expose the same blessed dirt,Big City Dreams in Concrete Poetry More Like This
I had under my fingernails seventeen years ago,
Bleeding envy for those stolen from this town,
Who now fade in salt water foreign to my taste buds,
And walk on roads unfamiliar to my feet,
While I rot on these jaded streets,
Anxiously waiting at the bus stop,
Carrying my ambition and abandoning the standard,
Seeking out my big city dreams.
BurialI wonder if you felt out of time, or if you felt time at all?Burial in Concrete Poetry More Like This
Defeated, but you appeared so whole.
A casket contradiction, rosy cheeks on a frostbit baby.
I envision you soaring But never breaking ground.
Your peach body swallowed by the earth.
But we're burying this girl in our hearts.
A beginningShadows eclipse the sunshine in my worldA beginning in Free Verse More Like This
as I stand alone, in my own failures
No more raindrops, only tears
Some real and others silent
mourning a dark past.
These black clouds won't last forever
they will be gone;
before a new,
and more colourful, dusk.