
The Revenge of YartekBeware the man who knocks four timesThe Revenge of Yartek3 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
BANG BANG BANG BANG. "HELLO?" Yartek continued to smash the phone against the brickwork. Some rather expensive technology started to crack and splinter under the strain.
Yartek didn't care. It wasn't his phone.
"I KNOW you can hear me!" he bellowed, his squeaky, girly voice echoing down the phone line. "I can hear you giggling."
"That's better."
"What do I want? You know what I want? I want back in!"
"Yeah, I want to be in Doctor Who again."
"Of course you can do it, you're the producer."
"Sod off! You brought the MACRA back!"
"I don't care if they've got a good union. Screw the Macra."
"Oh. Ew."

Things Daleks Would Never SayO-M-G! YOU LOOK FAB-U-LOUS! IS THAT PRA-DA?Things Daleks Would Never Say4 years ago in Humor More Like This
THATS WHAT SHE SAID.
O-KAY, WE GIVE UP. YOU WIN, DOC-TOR.
TIME FOR A MAKE-O-VER, GIRLS!
HEL-LO. MY NAME IS DA-LEK CAAN. YOU KILLED MY FA-THER. PRE-PARE TO DIE.
ALLONS-Y!
O-M-G-F-T-W-B-B-Q?
AM I BOV-VERED?
OH, SOD IT. WHO NEEDS EXTERMINATION ANYWAY? IM JUST GOING TO GO HOME AND MAKE A CUP OF TEA
GIT-R-DONE!
UNICORNS ARE PRET-TY!
I NEED A HUG