A Cat's LifeA Cat's LifeA Cat's Life3 years ago in Free Fella More Like This
The averge day of a cat is one of splender and joy
It is a life suited for only the finest animals and only kings and queens can truly understand them
The averge day of a cat is much harder to fullfill than it looks
Do you humans think it's easy to kick the litter so far out of the box?
Has it never occured to you that it takes great strength and flexability to make sure that my litter ends up ALL THE WAY across the room?
And what about hiding under the stair case and raking my claws across your ankles?
You never even consider how much power of mind, how much timing and planning and speed it takes to stick out my claws right when your feet come walking by
I'm sure you've not taken into account what great talent it takes to find the perfect time to lay on your laptop and sleep wile you're trying to meet your deadline
Nor do you ever seem to notice how much vocal training it takes to make my feline vocal chords reach that perfect pitch of loud, obnoxious meowing
Cat JournalDay 983 of my captivityCat Journal3 years ago in Free Fella More Like This
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Imbeciles! There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn