how to be honesti was 14 and in love, i was 14 and cryinghow to be honest7 years ago in Free Verse
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under a blue trampoline, deciding that day would be a good day
to save my dinner money
for something more important.
i learnt the hard way that stuffing lies behind my ribcage did nothing
but aided them to grow so tall they fell through
and banged hard,
like a ten man band reminding me
that I have swimming pools full of care to give
and nobody to take it,
I just tie my hair back and take off my shoes,
swallow my heart again and let it soak my eyes.
the pathological drinker by my feet cannot help,
the bulimia in my fingertips does not get it out fast enough
And safety pins are not that safe at all.
these lungs have lost half their capacity in twenty seconds,
while my brain cells thirst
for twice as much,
i have a million problems like these
burrowed in paper cuts, in my bedsprings,
where my chest lay in 189 pieces.
i am small, but i still i told you a secret
that weighed six fat-years more than me.
i was surprised when your leg did no
do not attempt to remove thisIt comes out fast, but not in words.do not attempt to remove this7 years ago in Free Verse
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This is my life, the direction the blood flows
the direction my fingers point. Hard,
shoving down into places I've only just seen,
places I only dare reach after three hours
of alcohol. And here I am again, besides piles of dirt,
and I am pushing outwards
from my heart. Running against worlds that have words
magnified and I see why,
but wish it was not like this,
like swallowing flying sauces,
these are collected wounds, thinking straight,
sat under a double duvet on a single bed
and I will not look up. I will check moles three times a day
for inflation, take in oxygen while holding a notebook with 40 poems
If my back bends to my breaking point, if my abdomen muscles split
like cold lips, if I tell the truth
will it take me up in elevators, will it take me down new halls?
This is falling, this is never reaching the ground,
never eating leaves then getting up to go.
What if I am sorry, if I could jump harder up and down,
if I could cau