
What is noi was looking for someone once,What is no6 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
it wasnt you,
but i found you instead.
i wasnt disappointed so much as surprised
but life takes different courses
as rivulets of tears and blood down my cheeks
you know. you do.
when realisation hits you like a knife in the guts
spewing forth your last meals,
and all the tubework you knew you had, but never have had the pleasure of viewing.
i remember the day i saw my first.
i remember the day i saw my first.
i remember the days of everythings
but i like to shut it out
i like to remember sunshine
even if the warmth i feel on my face in closed eyes
is the heat of anger
the rain i feel,
salty ch

i love the way i say ithow come perfection could be the smile of apology you made when you were always latei love the way i say it6 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
how come perfection could be
could be
would be
cant be
was?
was.
wasnt.
was it?
ricocheting back
and forth
velocity isnt lost each time
the bounce has changed
direction

whe n i fal li t coul d stil l happe nwhe n i fal l6 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
i t coul d stil l happe n
mayb e
mayb e
i t
coul d
i a m stuc k u p dow n o n i t
dow n o n i t
i surrende r gladl y fo r
i kno w thi s
glidin g
familiarit y - famil y - hear t hear t
collapsin g i n o n i t itsel f
bea t
bea t
beatin g int o m e
i a m s o sur e
s o unsur e
o f i t o f i t al l
ca n yo u hel p m e
hel p mysel f
i t i s abou t t o happe n
an y da y no w
i ca n jus t fee l i t
lik e electricit y
i n th e ai r
pulsin g throug h th e
liqui d t o m y lip s
i a m echoin g i n
thes e hallway s o f
tremblin g lightl y gentl y quietl y
i wa s s o sur e unsur e
i wa s s o unsur

two taughtYou were me in my dream. I watched you placate myself with nervous flickings of my fringe behind my ears. Smoke curled around my splutterings as you habitually inhaled, forgetting it wasnt your body; those werent your lungs.two taught6 years ago in General Fiction More Like This
I tried to warn you before you looked into my satchel; you made me take out a handful of balled up tissues, bunches of forgotten receipts and a half empty notepad, with some useless words scrawled joylessly across the half full. No pen.
Curses started to back flip continuously out of my mouth, words you had always said, and I had never wanted to. I tried to tell you that I didnt mean what I was saying&

running through the messesyou trick your mind,running through the messes6 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
you forget all the impulses,
you silence the routines and fractures of memories isolating your every moment.
you take a long cold drink.
you rest your head against the wall for some stability.
you let your mind drain out the sludge you keep there rotting.
you stop the motions,
you stop them just before they start,
you volley your thought processes into another direction.
you loosen your grip,
you let it take hold of you for just a second,
you allow yourself to give in to the screaming and all of the rushing voices.
you do this
you do this so you can
you do this so you can just go on.

Ahh...fingertip to fingertipAhh...6 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
in essences of whispers
a sentience
surrounded
and ignored
swallowed in
deep within
this circumference
surrounded
deep within
swallowed in
surrounded
fingertip to fingertip
wrist to wrist
surrounded
bound and bidden
fingertip to fingertip
surrounded
and ignored
surrender your sighs
i shall release mine
like ghosts of ever
after this
surrounded
mists of release
fingertip to fingertip
surrounded and ignored
these forces
these unseen forces
are your feet
are my feet
and opposite polarities
gravities
centripetals
centre petals
he doesn't...
surrounded
finger tip to fingertip
swallowed

golden cageThis day: today. Is any other day, all days.golden cage6 years ago in Philosophical More Like This
Tomorrow, yesterday. Everything in one, nothing in it all.
You take a bit of black, and with every brushstroke you shade hurt
and pain and suffering; all the cliches that only we, us, you, me, ever feel
for the first time, every time. Exactly how each generation creates sex.
No one wants to believe in ultimate nothingness, not even the depressed little ones with their drunken fist shaking at night skys.
Even when convincing yourself to believe that there is only void, null, empty black holes and vacuums full of minus; some stagnance remains - human hope.
Which is just another term for huma

vacillateim just here,vacillate6 years ago in Surrealism More Like This
placidly skimming the tips of my toes in circular directions on your chest.
no.
absent mindedly stringing myself up as drying pearls that you
possibly. well it was never going to be a question of never
but a question of when.
[dont ever sing it to me]
dont you sing it to me
but you sang it to me.
fingers on lips, then sticky taped lips down, then electric tape,
then it was just another voice beating on inside of me.
(i wont ever let me say it)
sometimes maybe, perhaps,
i wish it were more...
basis for complaint is compliance
how much?
how long? and what else did you lose in the tumble?
my stones are nearly smoot

becoming y.I was brought up well.becoming y.6 years ago in Transgressive More Like This
My mother taught me to feel guilty about everything.
And of all the boys that ever flailed their cocks at me like I owed them that kind of therapy, you were the only one that made me feel like a fucking whore.
but i want to go back to there, to then, to that time. not now. not here. not this.
this is shit.
i am in read-only mode.
give me some hope for other people
i'll sleep when the room stops spinning, when the thoughts stop coming
got none left for me
i try to make as little noise as i can. in whatever i do.
i smile at little kids. they tend to smile back.
it's like infiltration, a pretty package, with a l

When no one is around youLook, I'm going to start saying your name like a swear word, okay? I'm going to muster all my little kiddedness and scream it like I can offend someone, see.When no one is around you6 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
I'm just going to say it at inopportune moments, and clasp both of my hands over my mouth when I say it in front of the wrong people.
I'm not going to say it like a magic word anymore, I'm not going to say it like it invokes enough happiness in a papercup that I can swallow down and easily discard of the carrier. Crush.
Well then. I'm just lying arent I?
I'm not going to say your name at all anymore; I leave it up to the screams.

lappedi want to be sp i ltlapped6 years ago in Typographical More Like This
osso
white bl ms of cream ing
splatter
splatter
i want to be spilt all over
all over
all over [the floor]
[all over you]
...would you cry over me?

pleasance: an un-i am lost in this vale of i'spleasance: an un-6 years ago in Other More Like This
this trudging through of whys
memories
and
forget-mes
(nots)
knots in my
as i
why
in an all the same melting down of a couple of jumbled letters and a you

mosaicand we'll go on living our livesmosaic6 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
and we'll go in pretending
and we'll go out ignoring
the truths we never face
and we'll go on dying inside
and we'll go on exchanging
this for that, and every other else
to try and substitute
and we'll go on living our lives
and we'll go on living
and we'll go
and
we'll go on living our lives
dying inside
because the best parts are always broken
because the best ones are always shattered
and you can never fix what was never whole

indefatigablewhy is it that you always realise too lateindefatigable6 years ago in Other More Like This
'too late'
and yet what is that exactly?
it isnt understanding, changing yourself to fit someone else's predisposition for thoughts of you
to be same
to marry into someone else's mould
and pretty fucking picture
it is a tiny lie breathed in through tigering breaths
i can't change myself in order for others to 'make' me shake me happy
-
i am much better aren't i when i don't speak
it lets an impression last
doesn't sully memory
--
i want understanding
i i wont get it
i know
i know
it ' s drowning in dreams again
it is letting mellifluous memories drown me in their sticky sweet e

'snot whiteive wondered lakes of petals'snot white6 years ago in Surrealism More Like This
in a journey to you
lowered toes into depths of crimson
through to sight lines of kisses
supposing that roses don't have thorns,
and that ice does not melt,
backwards, we could say time decays into bloom
and whatever comes down must always fill up.
falling upwards with tenser velocities
what we could then deduce is that a smile
is really a grimace, a tear, laughter
an expanse of sighs, neutral, for the cancelling of both signs.
so then colours are better,
we can find that our sky is always
blue when we put our glasses on
and black light will be white, so you can never paint things on your arms.
we

and we willand we'll go out with our new modesand we will6 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
our new waves of thought
of being,
of laughter
we'll create new jokes
new idioms
new cliches
that we'll bounce back in one anothers lips
as kisses
but not.
we'll forward on charging
like we were batteries left for enough hours to
listen to your songs again.
we'll be new and bright and shining like a star
finally showing from behind clouds
we'll be happy and shining like children running on beaches naked
where sex isn't anything but girl or boy
we'll jump off cliffs and sew each other back up with band aids and dettol
because big brands make healing more real.
oh we will chase our nightma

Number one and tooi need to start a conversation with myself.Number one and too6 years ago in Surrealism More Like This
there is a word perhaps, as a trigger, as a falling into descent procured.
i know, i know paragraphs, gentle paragraphs.
you could start it off with an affirmative.
with an i...
but dont, lovely lingering on nothings meaning everything is better.
more suited to actionless action.
and some sort of, right, smile.
so you start off with a 'hello'
with a 'how are you'
a generalised 'good, good, well that's fantastic'
and you stop.
dead straight staring into your own eyes.
incredulous, with faking,
speaking to yourself in such a way.
you could start with a scribbled note left to remind you

enter on cuesweat on your brow makes a good mixer for tinctureenter on cue6 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
your body is not my canvas, leather as it
is in the hardening stare of the sun
the son is a stone throw within you
rippling concentric circles in your eyes, ink
splatters on your dossier in
remembrance of
who
you
were.
obli-(que)
(ne)-gation
ground it all
to a pulp

Breaking upon wakingcrystal refractionsBreaking upon waking6 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
ally splendour to your teardrops
fascinated by the rainbows
bursting out of your eyes
reminiscing on your byways goneways idly violating
lone lines of thrumming
resonance
pitch
and fall.
i lack obstinance (surely i dont)
i lack resistance
and yet there is too much friction.
we are left with carpet burns
streaking through the sky as we
falling is so lovely
falling is so
falling is
falling
is falling so lovely?
as i say, with you, torture is pleasance,
death is awakening in your arms and realising warmth
protects nightmares away hidden back in pockets and shoe boxes
of shadows, behind doorways.
sleep,

orchestratedshoulders breakorchestrated6 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
of waves upon and crest -
suggest, lament
torn sides of shivering
blanketed between,
release and specimen
of touch, devoid
care swaddled in old
crowded on the precipice
burgeoning silver blossoms,
contusioned night
flight free of irredeem
dirge for prayer
swept kept, head rest
alas - time flickers...
for anon
release, pittered patters
on patterned white and black
dances of fingers,
ears lovers tease
for you,
this symphony in skin,
gentle races of erased flowing
beating me to descent.

Hiss Kiss excuse me i saidHiss Kiss6 years ago in Other More Like This
excuse me, fucking me
i not want
want not i
dont
i dont want to curtsy for you any more
a r a gg e d lipped derisive smile
decision on elusion
cant quite comprehend the why
suppose it isnt so
and we traipse forth and back hallways of combed straight lines
jigging the jogging of same same
no.
i wouldnt have it
yet i do, f

i just want to drift intoinsignificance reallyi just want to drift into6 years ago in Other More Like This
stopping
changing
carrying forth another
episode
ick
glimpse of
glance
over
here
and
it
all
just
disappears
dis- appears ?
how about just not appearing at all
non-appearing
fruitless
ca(k)re
less
much less
than
this
strung along an inconsistent song
struggling for a moment's piece of sentiment
struck by the inability to peace it all together
am
i am
you are
we all are
are all
just
we
another another person's triangle
a shaved head of dots to plan a map of your life
dot one, breathe
dot two, eat
dot three, drink
dot four, shit
dot five, fuck
dot six, find more eloquent ways in

dontophiliaShe loves the way they feel on her fingersdontophilia5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
as she rubs them back and forth.
The pressure, the roughness,
it felt much like relief.
But oh, when he used his
how it made her shiver.

The girlYou're not so tough, I think looking her over. She stood there in her black band tee and cons, looking like she could kick someone's ass if they dared talk to her. She was smaller than me, but I didn't doubt that she could take me down. I started to walk towards her, intending to take the risk. Just as I got close she pulled a paperback from her back pocket and started thumbing through it. I decided that was a sign she didn't want company so I continued to walk around her. When I got to the kitchen I cursed myself for being such a coward. I poured myself a mix of sodas adding a splash of alcohol. I stood for a minute, trying to decideThe girl5 years ago in General Fiction More Like This