InsanityInsanity6 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
To Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time, You Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice!
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write 'For Marijuana'
6. Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With The Prophecy'.
7. Skip down the hall, Rather Than Walk!, and see how many wierd looks you get.
8. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
9. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.
10. Sing Along At The Opera.
11. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.
12. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.
13. When T
Heart and Home, ch1Heart and Home, ch13 years ago in General Fiction More Like This
It was autumn and the smell of rotting leaves on the chill morning air was almost pleasant. Better than the usual scents of filth and decay in Kirkwall, anyhow. Thanks to Merrill, they were hiking up the Sundermount again, on their way to do something stupid. Extremely stupid. The tiny Dalish mage looked worried as Hawke walked beside her, and behind them Varric grumbled.
She hated to drag him out of the city like this, but there really wasn't anyone else she could trust to come along on this errand. Before leaving, she'd spoken to Aveline and left notes for Sebastian and Fenris. The guard captain was suspicious, but she knew better than to pry. Sebastian would be unhappy that he was left behind, but there was no way she could drag the Chantry brother out to summon a demon. Just thinking about it made her feel tense and unhappy. And Fenris . . . Fenris would be livid when she
Invictus - Chapter One - Tears of a Broken HeartInvictus - Chapter One - Tears of a Broken Heart3 years ago in Romance More Like This
Chapter One -Tårer af et knust hjerte - Tears of a broken heart
Margurite Shepard: Earth-born, War Hero, Sentinel. Full Paragon with a very healthy dose of Renegade. Saved Wrex, Saved Rachni Queen, Romanced Kaiden, Saved Kaiden at Virmire, Saved the Destiny Ascension; All squad members recruited and loyal, destroyed Heretic Geth, Destroyed Collector Base, Miranda and Legion killed.
For the purposes of this story, Shepard doesn't receive Thane's LotSB letter until after he leaves.
"Shepard, ETA to Invictus is twenty minutes."
Shepard rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand. "Thank you, EDI. Have Garrus and Tali meet me at the Kodiak in thirty."
Margurite Shepard stared with empty eyes through the dark portal above her bed into the empty blackness of space. She didn't need a mirror
DA2: SolaceTitle: SolaceDA2: Solace3 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
Game: Dragon Age 2
Characters/Pairings: Isabela, FemHawke/Fenris
The pungent liquor ran down her throat in huge gulps, starting to take effect on her tired mentality. Blood was rushing to her head, causing a blush to come over her face. Her eyes felt as if they were crossed, her tongue felt slick against her teeth, and her limbs were beginning to feel heavy. Cozy warmth emanated from her fingertips, and every touch caused what was like an electrical current to run through them. The people surrounding her were blurred, and their voices were muffled. Sentences formed in her mind slurred into a mess of words, and the reason why she was drinking was becoming hazier by every second.
It was exactly as Hawke wanted it.
The woman beside her was making the most noise in the tavern with her cheering and toasting. Being scantily dressed did no harm in attracting younger, craving gazes upon her.
Animal Rights in 210 WordsAnimal Rights in 210 Words7 years ago in Academic Essays More Like This
Why do we choose those that we are familiar with over those that we cannot familiarize with instantaneously? Just because animals cannot speak multiple languages, or urbanize acres of land, does not mean that they are lesser than us. Do we not both eat, breath, and communicate with the world? We have come to accept the fact that we are the greater race, we have been told so and have thought so throughout history.
But what of the dolphin? Or the pig? Has science not shown us that they equal us in intelligence? But yet we still slaughter them and disregard them as lowly beasts. They may not walk on two legs, or are clearly understandable, but does that really mean we are better? We think that we cannot share the land, so instead take it over. We think that we cannot listen to animals simply because we cannot understand them, so we view them as dumb and unreasoning.
But maybe were the unreasoning and dumb beasts. If living things are our equals in
KalahiraMass EffectKalahira3 years ago in General Fiction More Like This
Guided Meditation -
Shepard and Thane
The captain's quarters are far off from the engineering deck, but I can still hear the hum of the engines if I shut the music off and listen to the quiet. Most nights, it's enough to get me to sleep.
I'll lay back and watch the stars crawl by through the skylight, or watch the fish flit around in their tanks. Slowly, it becomes harder and harder to keep my eyes open. I'll roll over so the glow of the fish tank doesn't penetrate the darkness behind my closed eyes as I drift off to sleep.
The darkness is overwhelming. If I squint really, really hard I can just barely make out the pinpricks of distant stars. But it's so hard to keep my eyes open. I'm cold. Freezing cold, so cold I feel like my bones will implode and my skin will tear as it shrivels and tightens and I open my mouth to scream.
I can't. I open my mouth, try to
In PreparationIn Preparation3 years ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
Title: In Preparation
Author: E-Girl007 (Emily G.)
Game: Mass Effect
Characters/pairing: Kaidan Alenko
Disclaimer: Mass Effect and Kaidan Alenko are property of BioWare and Electronic Arts. This is purely a non-profit entertainment exercise. The writing however is my own, and I would ask that if you wish to feature it anywhere make sure credit is given to both myself, and BioWare/EA. Thank you.
Something old was playing on the sound system. Something really old. Kaidan looked up from his drink and over to the stage where the musicians played. The front woman was blonde and hugged the microphone, pressing it to her lips like the romance would make all the difference. She had a low voice that slanted sweetly in all of the right places. He turned completely in his seat to give his full attention to the stage.
Ain't it good to know that you've got a friend, when people can be so cold
Her eyes met Kaidan's and she smiled as she moved in time with the piano and the guitar.
Children and AnimalsChildren and Animals3 years ago in Romance More Like This
When she got to the clinic he was busy - as usual. There were groans and coughs from the many patients littered on the rough cots scattered around and Anders was talking earnestly with a haggard young woman who was holding a boy in her arms. The boy was shaking; she could hear muffled sobs and even from the door she could see his arm, hanging limp away from his body, had been very badly burnt.
"Bring him over here," Anders said in his soft voice. He hadn't noticed Saoirse enter and she scanned the room quickly, looking to see if there were any cases she could deal with. When she couldn't find anyone who was in immediate need of her help she turned back to Anders, who had managed to get the boy to sit up on one of the taller wooden benches.
"And how old are you, Serah?" Anders said.
"Mam says I've got ten summers, Messere Anders," he said, hiccuping a few times as he tried to repress the tears that filled his eyes and threatened to spill.
"Really? I would have thought you were at least
A Half Hour TillA Half Hour Till3 years ago in Sci-Fi More Like This
It was almost time to go. She was sure Miranda was on top of things but Shepard would have to double check everything. She would have to suit up, check weapon stability, make sure there was enough ammo, and check reinforcement on barrier and shield batteries amongst other things. It was terrible. All she wanted was to stand here with Thane in the shower until she was good and ready. But time would not permit it. There was suddenly so much they both wanted to live for. To have it taken away would be
"Siha" he probably read the sadness in her eyes. Thane brought her closer with his hands locked in hers. She followed to wrap her arms around him, breathing in his scent. It was something even the water cascading down them could not take away.
"I don't want it to stop here" she confessed.
"Nor I, Siha."
She slouched further into him, burying her face in the crevice of his neck. "If I told you I was scared, would you still follow me into this?" She closed her eyes in shame as
Drops In The Ocean ShepardxAlenkoDrops In The Ocean ShepardxAlenko3 years ago in Romance More Like This
"I appreciate the help." Shepard said with a bitter tone in her voice, her hand clasping the recently acquired data pad the Asari councilor handed her with minimal interest of what the report actually said. They were talking high detailed secrets, there wasn't going to be anything in a written report, she already deduced that. The issue was the severity in the councilor's voice, the sheer desperation for help.
"It's you who will be helping us. The Matriarchs are growing desperate, for the first time in our history Thessia is vulnerable." She sighed and began to walk away, her hands folding in front of her body. Shepard could only follow as she continued to explain the situation with incredible skill, the vague details leaving key facts carefully eluded. "For all our intellect we're outmatched by Reaper fire power." Shepard wanted to laugh at that, remembering Liara's father and how she mentioned the Asari tactics were about as useful as tits on a hanar in a time like this.
Chronicle~ Chapter OneChronicle~ Chapter One3 years ago in Settings More Like This
"Be home before dusk Kalia, I don't like the way these skies look today," Mum called after me as I tugged on my father's old gray Alliance jacket. I smirked as I slipped out the door of our bungalow without saying a thing back to her-
At the time I didn't realize how much I would come to regret this.
The old autumn air greeted me with a chill as the leaves dance around my worn combat boots. I looked around at the small settlement we lived in, at the long steel bungalows, the people going about their daily priorities, and at the Alliance flag that stood high in the middle of it all. Mindoir was originally set up to look like earth so that the Alliance pilots that came here before their first mission wouldn't feel so lost in the planet's vast gray skies. But about fifty years into the project the scientist noticed that the chemicals they placed in the core of the planet were affecting the people more th
Two Hawkes: First NightsThe two blondes stood outside the Hawke estate, neither man eager to go insideTwo Hawkes: First Nights3 years ago in Romance More Like This
"You know they've been drinking " The first said.
"Please tell me your lyrium stash is well hidden "
"She finds it no matter where I hide the damn thing, it's like she can smell it."
Both shook their heads and sighed, "Templars " they said at the same time.
"Well I guess we better go in and stop this before it goes too far."
They entered the mansion, hearing the high pitched laughter from the study. Indeed the women had thrown a party in their absence and it sounded like it was in full swing.
"Then h-he he you know what he did then Thera?" Maeve slurred, swaying side to side slightly while she sat on the floor in front of the fire.
"Heehee, what did he do Maeve?"
"Oh I thi-think y-you already know "Maeve purred before bursting into a fit of giggles.
"T-tell me anyways!" Thera commanded, falling out of her chair and laughing.
"It involved electricit
Maybe,Maybe,3 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
There was no certainty in his voice when he told her to leave. It was as if the words had spilled from his mouth on their own accord, he had not given them such permission to hurt her as they did. Hawke's lips turned into a deep frown, the edge of her soft mouth yanked back in a gentle growl.
"Fine." She spat, turned on her heel and marched out of the clinic.
Anders stood rooted to his spot for a few moments, staring angrily after her as she disappeared down the steps of his Darktown clinic. When she had completely evaporated from his sight, he threw up his hands and began pacing in a manic rage. "Fine? FINE?! Everything I've done for that blighted-- and she responds with 'fine'?!" He gave a roar that would've put Fenris's battle cries to shame as he slammed his fist into a nearby wall. The soft dirt crumbled under his violent impact. "Doesn't she know the dangers? The risk she's taking? The-- the..." Anders dragged a hand over his face as a small
We will be StormClanWe will be StormClan3 years ago in General Fiction More Like This
I woke during the night to find Crowfeather sitting just inside our den, watching the rain fall outside. A chill had swept into the once-warm tiny cavern, and I fluffed my fur up against it, suspecting it might have been because he was no longer beside me. Bits of rain splashed from the ground onto his paws, soaking the fur above his paw pads. A crack of thunder, almost like a lion's roar, caused the fur on the back of his spine to lift.
I lifted my head, and that was enough motion for him to look back at me, warmth returning to his eyes, which had been glazed and distant. "Crowfeather? What's wrong?"
He started to stand, then shifted back into a sit again, wrapping his tail tightly around his front legs. "I couldn't sleep," he said. "I kept thinking about what it's going to be like when we make our own clan." His eyes flashed with passion.
A thorn twisted in my belly. The thought of clans only made me think about what I'd left behindmy sister, Squirrelflight, my mother and
Deliverance-Chapter 1Deliverance-Chapter 13 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
She could almost feel the stares, but she didn't really care; her entire attention was focused on the screen before her. Absently, she thought she would have done better to take this incoming mail upstairs in her cabin, but it had been too late to do that the moment she read the opening line.
"We have someone you're familiar with "
Normally, she'd have dismissed the transmission at once, consider it a cruel, malicious joke or even a scam-there were a lot of those going round the extranet, after all-but she had instead read through it. And she was sure she had been staring at her screen for a goodly amount of time by now; given she normally didn't stand still for this long, it was no wonder people were getting concerned.
"Everything alright, Commander?" a hesitant voice finally asked and she blinked, recognizing it as her appointed assistant. She had been the one to point her to the unread message a few long minutes ago; she nodded, looking up, trying to seem as fo
Mass Effect: Playlist PairingsMass Effect: Playlist Pairings2 years ago in General Fiction More Like This
1) Something More
For a moment in time, there are no threats to the galaxy. No rogue spectres, no collectors, no batarian space stations, no geth revolutionaries. Just him and her and the soft humming of the ship. It's unnerving for all the wrong reasons, but the lack of imminent death or dismemberment saps his will to respond.
And yet, they're out there. The comm blinks green with a message from the Alliance Military that they've both been ignoring for the past 23.8 hours. Reapers still loom in the distance. Loss still weighs heavy in their hearts.
There's always something out there. Something trying to tear them apart. Always something more trying to destroy them.
But for now, space drifts past the cabin window silently. The fish tank buzzes. The space hamster squeaks his wheel. Shepard snores lazily and shifts against him.
All is right an
No Sympathy for DevilsNo sympathy for devils.No Sympathy for Devils3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Not for them, or us.
You know what we are.
You can see it in our nature,
Indivisible from our truest form.
My breath portends brutality.
Violence has always composed our core.
To deny it would be to deny our heritage.
I must harness my birthright.
Judge me not
By the temperament of my voice,
Or the iron in my eyes,
But by the will with which I fight.
Your pity is an unwelcome crutch.
I refuse it.
Do not question our nobility.
We wage war on many fronts,
But our enemy is singular.
We have seen him.
We know him well.
Our lives will be the final offering.
We'll build the altar ourselves.
No, we don't need your help,
But you may sharpen the knife, if you wish.
A Poem of a WardenMy blade sinks in to the rotting fleshA Poem of a Warden3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Never doubt her, she always knows best
A swing of my steel, and down goes the beast
Another victory, and tonight we shall feast
For the Darkspawn are falling and the heroes Rejoice.
The bard will sing of our Valor, praise from her voice.
A century has past, since the Archdemon fell
A century of peace, now thrown down to hell
A swing from my blade, and a raise of my cup.
Tonight we celebrate, as we climb back up.
The Maker has challenged us, our Grey Wardens fight
For the Darkspawn that come, we will fight through the night.
Time has repeated, but our numbers replenished
One-Hundred thousand strong, we won't stop till their finished
Refusal to quit, refusal to halt
We are Grey Wardens, by choice not by fault
Our magic is strong, our swings just as mighty
With the force of our steel, and the passion in our hearts
Their numbers will falling, Andraste will guide us.
We are Grey Wardens, and never shall we fall.
Strings of the Guitar,Notes from my HeartWhen Shepard entered the Starboard Observation Deck,she knew what she was about to find.And she was right.Kaidan was sitting at the couch waiting for her.However,what took Shepard by suprise was the instrument Kaidan was presiously holding in his hands.Strings of the Guitar,Notes from my Heart2 years ago in Romance More Like This
"A guitar?"Shepard said as she stepped in front of him,looking carefully the acoustic guitar Kaidan had in his legs.His hands playfully touched the strings,while a small grin appeared across the line of his face.
"Yep.It was a gift from my mother. It was my companion during BAaT.I remember sitting in the middle,all the other kids around me "Kaidan said a bit melancholic.Shepard was sitting next to him and threw a quick glance over the window.
"Was Rahna among them?"she asked him softly.Knowing that this incident was a black page for Kaidan,she gulped after doing the question.Stupidstupidstupid Kaidan looked at her,his brown eyes crashing into her green ones.
"Yes,she was and apparently she seemed impressed by my musician abili
Lost In The WoodsLost In The Woods3 years ago in Drama More Like This
My lungs are going to explode.
There is no other way to describe it. I need more air but they are incapable of delivering it.
I'm running. Running running running and I cannot stop, they will catch me. My bare feet slip across rain slicked leaves. I am in the forest, water drips from the ebony tendrils plastered to my head, neck, and shoulders. My robes are soaked, weighing me down. I slip off the thick outer layer and shiver, willingly surrendering my body to the cold.
They are after me.
Terror, fear, it is a stench that seeps from my soul to coat the land around me. I am sure they can sense it, they know this smell well, and the howls that pierce the air confirm it.
I am no longer a girl, a mage; I am not considered a person any more.
I am prey, I am the object of desire, and they want me to fall to watch as the mabaris' tear me to pieces.
I stumble over roots and fallen tree branches, my thin hands gripping tree trunks and plant vines. The rough bark scrapes my delicate flesh.
Finding Strength ShepardxAlenko"You mean a lot to me Kaidan, I love you." Three years. Three absolutely agonizing years Kaidan had waited for Shepard to whisper those three simple words to him. As her hand brushed against his face and he looked into her eyes, she held nothing but affection and admiration for him. There had always been holding back, skirting around the idea, and light playful jokes about it. But when he finally had her sitting in his lap, their gazes locked in each other she finally let him know just how much she cared about him. There was nothing keeping her from him anymore, as he'd long abandoned his philosophy of leaving a way out as well. He no longer wished to be with anyone else, no one else would ever be able to fill him so completely the way Shepard did. He wanted to be hers and hers alone, he wanted to be the man she needed, the man she wanted. It was obvious that Shepard didn't actually need a man to protect her. She could handle herself against just about anything this galaxy could thrFinding Strength ShepardxAlenko3 years ago in Romance More Like This
Nowhere To Go But Forward - Shiny ObjectsGarrus stretched out in the MAKO, hands interlocking behind his head as he leaned back, resting his feet on the dashboard and stared out at the lush green landscape before him. It would have been a nice place to vacation one day. Too bad the air would kill all of them if they tried to go out without their helmets.Nowhere To Go But Forward - Shiny Objects3 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
He glanced over at Shepard in the driver's seat beside him, who was currently drumming the wheel with intent purpose. Probably trying to figure out how she was going to find a single data module in a colony inundated by pyjaks, no doubt. She kept looking down at the radar and then looking back up before returning back to the monitor, brow furrowed. Perhaps it would have been better if the geth had gotten to it first.
"That admiral of yours never wants to send you anywhere nice, does he?"
She sighed, sinking back into her seat, giving up on whatever tactical plan she was trying to come up with. "No, he really doesn't." She reached down and tossed him his rifle. "C'mon. Doubt t