Depression and I are Fuck BuddiesWhen I was young I made a friend.
She was kind of quiet-
a loner, like me.
She wore a long cloak of stars and melodies
that would wrap around us both when she got close.
As we got older
we became closer-
until she was all I could see.
She gave me words of comfort,
whispered when no one was around.
And I would hold her close,
Keeping her curled up inside.
Even when she was mean,
I would forgive her.
If she made me cry,
I would hold her closer.
We are never apart for very long,
though the people around us would try
and rip us from each other’s grasp.
She would simply disappear
for hours or days or months.
And soon she would sneak in my bedroom
with her cloak of starlight and music
and hold me in a lovers’ embrace.
End of a long day.I’m tired.End of a long day.7 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
Maybe I should go
And lay down
Searching for you again in my dreams
It’s been too long
Since we met last
I’m chasing you
Like a shadow
Sometimes you’re there
Sometimes I’m all alone
Left out in the light
Without anything to hold on to
Doubting if this thing is really true
You’re like a wild animal
It’s impossible to tame you
You come only when you like
Stay only as long as needed
To remember me I’m still here
Bringing the breath of life back into my dusty bones
I wish you’d stay
Be on my side for all days
Because without you
I feel I’m nothing but a passing shadow
In a world of blackness.
Depression - What It Is InsideTrapped and enclosed,Depression - What It Is Inside9 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
It can't be exposed.
It knows all we're taught,
and contradicts every word.
We become it's biggest addict.
It has no faith.
It has no love.
It comes too late into the age,
And chokes all who feel it hang,
To evict us from our home.
Without a fault.
Without a soul.
It's nothing we should know.
Guilty of sitting alone,
Unworthy of what others deserve.
No need for fears,
No need to pretend.
Only a desire to disappear.
Don't reach for the brightest hand,
Just crawl away.
This idea of none,
To some a magicians hoax.
Without a friend for fun,
The thought will never come,
To those who never know.
It forever persists,
It will never leave.
While we can't be saved,
And with nothing to be,
At our core we're not gone.
Murder your PoemMake your poem suffer,Murder your Poem7 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
it needs to know how you feel.
And if it doesn't, your poem is ignorant.
Gouge the pen deep within it, until bloody ink stains through.
Write very hard
so your poem can feel your scars.
If you crinkle the corners,
it needs to have broken tattered bones.
Feeling exhausted before your done.
Do not share or post your poem so soon,
for it needs to feel rejection.
Most important, before it dies.
Clean it's wounds, or tape its rips,
do no accept forgiveness..
As your poem dies, you'll be surprised.
Your dead withered poem,
Sheets“I adore you,”Sheets8 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
she said, whimsically twisted in the rippled gossamer sheets of their bed.
And in these words were memories of weather-worn love letters,
long kisses with smeared roseate lipstick,
and layered mascara outlining her chatoyant eyes,
for he loved the way it looked.
she said months later, tightly grasping the rippled gossamer sheets of her bed.
And in these words were soiled and crumpled goodbye notes,
untarnished roseate lipstick on her opulent lips,
and smeared mascara, creating an ashy mess on her pillowcase,
for who cares if he used to love the way it looked.
She whispered to empty sheets,
“I meant abhor you.”
AfraidIts not irrationalAfraid6 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
It is not stupid
Everyday is a battle
For this, I'm not suited
I am tired of fighting
These feelings, these urges
It should be exciting
But against my walls of iron, it surges
I want to have someone
Without these fears
Of this life, I've begun
I had many tears
Pain, misery, and no trust
Are my only experience
My heart is covered in dust
From only a few instances
I want to be nestled
Close to a person's heart
But everyday I wrestle
I just don't want to hurt
Mental SuicideI just might kill myself again.Mental Suicide10 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
Dying WorldWhen a young boys,Dying World8 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
Blood does run,
In his hands,
A loaded gun.
When a young girl,
Screams for mum,
As she is pulled,
Into a van.
When the elderly,
Are targets of ridicule,
From the hooligans,
With spiteful tongues.
When the newborn,
Have no chance,
Cause our world burns,
With each new dance.
See the dusk,
Of the age of man,
Stand beside me,
Beneath burning sun.
of deviantARTists and those who browseThey call us usersof deviantARTists and those who browse7 months ago in Haiku & Eastern More Like This
for a reason, now let me
get my daily fix
True HappinessHappiness isn’t about your deepest wishes coming trueTrue Happiness7 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
Neither is it about getting what you want when you want it.
It’s about appreciating all you have, while you still can.
Happiness is more than just a chemical reaction in our brains.
It is pure to the core, uncontaminated by passion or appetite.
Happiness is simplicity - finding the beauty in the little things in life,
The things that mean more to us than anything else in the entire world.
Happiness is, above all, a necessity of life.
Nobody can ever be truly void of joy, and if you beg to differ
Just know, that sometimes
It takes getting everything you’ve ever wanted
And then losing it all
To know what true happiness is.
GoodbyeI want to mutter a million things,Goodbye7 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
but they’re catching in my throat
And my heart is heavy in my chest,
with a weight that holds a heavy load
This weight is not a pound of gold,
but rather a pound of worthless rocks
And now I’m spitting bits of gravel
as I try to talk
Deceiver.Rip out my heart,Deceiver.6 months ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
And blind their eyes,
Show them your truth,
Feed them with lies.
Deceive my emotions,
Throw me to the ground,
My importance to you,
Is nowhere to be found.
Make me listen,
Do not let me express,
Your mind is divine,
And mine is much less.
Demonic eyes of death,
Angelic smile of life,
Pure hands that clean,
The blood off your knife.
Façade of light,
Hides your darkness,
Making them believe,
You only mean kindness.
The sound and the silenceThe sound of a heart breaking is not like glass shatteringThe sound and the silence3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
it's a loud, roaring scream of despair
and then silence
for the longest time, all there is, is silence.
But slowly, slowly a beat returns.
Faint, unsteady and fragile.
Like the tentative flutterings of a baby bird's wings, as it learns to fly.
So afraid of falling.
But slowly, slowly, the beat gets louder.
Like a drummer in a marching band.
Nervous and hopeful.
The sound of a heart beating again is like a soldier being welcomed home.
Covered in scars, but happy again.
Ready to face whatever lies ahead.
Sleep WellBedtime storiesSleep Well4 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
are told by memories,
and often end
with a hero dying inside us.
MonsterI'm the monster.Monster6 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
No, I don't need to hide under your bed,
inside your thoughts is good enough for me.
Only help will make me go away,
and I make sure you don't get it ever.
I come when your full of high spirits,
and push you down into a pit of despair.
Sometimes, I leave and make you
feel the cold numbness you despise.
You'd rather hurt then be numb,
and welcome me back.
Only the strong ones can shake me off,
and continue on their right path;
instead of the bad one I've created for you.
Suicidal BreathsWith a decrease in energy,Suicidal Breaths1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
Fatigue, sick-to-stomach and feelings of mortality,
She still survives,
Though she buries herself in broken lies.
She says she's fine,
She's just okay,
But deep down inside,
She's full of sorrowful pain.
She believes what she hears,
And avoids what she sees,
Feeling the sad, pity, indescribable beliefs.
She sits in a corner full of isolation and guilt,
Darkness and ache,
Counting the pills she spilled.
White and Blue,
Just one more.
Vision becoming blurry,
She's shaky and becoming worried.
Looking in a reflection,
Ribs soon distinguishable,
Bones and fright just popping out,
She screams inside and yells for help.
No one's around,
She can't hear a subtle sound.
She pleads to why she's on this earth,
Why her mother had to give birth.
She falls to the ground,
Blending into the darkness of the unspoken place,
She cries and cries,
Soon she'll be erased.
Five Truths I Never Spokei. Fuck you.Five Truths I Never Spoke4 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
People say you shouldn’t end things on a bad note
because god forbid you regret it later,
but I think this was the only truth you ever said to me
and i wish I could learn how to mean it right back
even when my hands aren’t shaking,
then maybe it would finally span the miles between these
two lonely islands.
I always knew I was a bit too much for most people
but I never deserved the words you layed out
(or the ones you held back)
and it took me far too long to come to terms with that.
ii. I give up.
I was never much of a quitter because
I never really participated in anything,
but this game has gone on far too long for my liking
and I’m rather tired of shitting around.
I am the worst with goodbyes but
there is something about you
that’s been gone much longer than you’ve been around,
so I guess I never really said hello in the first place.
Maybe I’ll see you around when you’re whole again,
but today I am leaving you behind, and
5:17 AMand it's sad to think5:17 AM6 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
that if you came back
to tear me apart
i'd let you.
On WritingWrite for todayOn Writing7 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
And like it’s all
That’ll be left of you
Never write for popularity.
Write with clarity, but
‘Don’t make everything said’.
Write a million things;
An ode to the voice
Inside your head,
An elegy for the living,
A carpe diem for the dead.
Write to tell
To just keep
They’ll find a way out.
Don’t write for approval,
That way misery lies.
Poetry can’t be judged,
Not properly –
Write for yourself;
Doesn’t matter if it’s
Good enough for
You’ll never be Shakespeare.
But he’d never
Have been you;
Pour your heart into it,
That’s the best
That you can do.
Imperfect WriterWords are written in a fluid motion.Imperfect Writer1 year ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
The thoughts are rushing; there’s so much commotion.
Cramps arise from within my wrist.
The story continues on without a murderous twist.
Stress has crept along my back,
For there’s something I believe I lack.
I can see the blood, the horror, and the hate.
But I cannot find whatever I expected would be great.
Every time there’s something missing,
Something that I don’t believe I’m overanalyzing.
So, I add and add and add until I find a fit,
But the unknown stretches to Beyond and I lose it.
Therefore, I make it all new again and again.
It all starts over, though, and I know I cannot win.
I dread the day when the unknown will consume everything whole,
And I’m left with another unfinished goal.
I’m an imperfect writer; that much is true.
But I’m not alone; you’re with me, too.
We, writers, all have been cursed,
For the good and for the worst.
Our thoughts are contaminated with lies,
And they expand
Slumber.He awoke to find himself asleep.Slumber.1 year ago in Philosophical More Like This
© Rocio Belinda Mendez 2013
Lost VirginityHe took pride;Lost Virginity11 months ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
She claimed shame.
Ode To Writer's BlockStaring at the piece of paperOde To Writer's Block1 year ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Without the faintest idea
Of what to write, I sit
In my chair, pencil not moving
Madness gaining another step
I wonder how many mornings
Or perhaps it was evening time
When Frost sat down to write, that he-
Spent staring at the empty page
Clueless about subject matter
Writer's block, such bloody torment
Making a wanker out of me
Always appearing at my door
At a most inconvienant time
What a terrible patron
When You Are AloneWe tell each other––When You Are Alone10 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
as our hands create bunnies on the wall––
that we can be nothing
when we are alone.
I do not feel alone,
and you do not look it,
and like cats, we are comfortable
with the quiet
knowledge that the world endures.
When I am curled into the arms
of my couch, I read books
When you are alone,
I [also] disappear.