Yes, this is cliche. Yes, this is a cry for attention because I need to get it out.
Yes, I'm officially coming out.
But only on the internet.
I. Am not. Straight.
I'm so tired of keeping it inside. I don't care if it's online but I need someone, anyone to know.
I am pansexual. I say pan because I find myself getting attracted to any gender, not just male and female. I figured it's time to stop pretending like it's not me and just embrace it the best I can instead of telling myself that I only think I feel this way. I've felt this way for about four years now. No, I'm not "confused"--I know what my heart wants and it makes me want to cry.
And if any of my friends in real life or my family knew this I don't know what they'd do. I don't know how they'd react. But I'm too fucking terrified to ever bring it up, even when everyone always bugs me about getting married and having children. I know some of them have accounts on here. And if they read this...please. Don't bring this up. Not yet. Let me bring it up to you. I'm sorry but I just don't think I can tell you yet.
Writing this has made me feel like someone punched me in the gut. Posting this is making my skin itch and sweat and oh god why am I doing this.