BipolarEvery day, wake up and take a pillBipolar5 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
So you don't go looking for lethal thrills.
Haven't you ever wanted to go to the brink
Of destruction, just to see if you'd sink
Into the clutches of death or if you'd survive
Just because God still wants you alive?
You live on time stolen not borrowed
From some intangible thing called tomorrow.
Forget that white, round pill stamped 1-4-2
And you'll realize how much you can do
If only they would let you try
To jump off, spread your wings, and fly.
But even with the meds in your system,
You still aren't without symptoms.
Your working memory abilities
Are poor enough to come to futility.
Imagine the frustration when you find
You can't recall what was in your mind
Just moments before. You find yourself lacking
And your brain seems to be slacking,
Even when you're given some cues
Not everything comes to mind for you.
And not only memory, but functioning speed
Is a hindrance and daily you find you need
More time than others do to process events
006When I was young,0062 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
so very, very young,
I was deeply in love with fans, propellers, windmills.
I remember having these tiny little miniatures in plastic,
with the most biting colour combinations; green-purple, red-yellow;
and I'd just sit there, blowing, and merrily watch the fins
And when I first saw cogwheels
and screws and crankshafts and eggwheels
I floated amidst the gorgeous sorcery.
I wanted to find out all about machines; how they where,
through what and by which they stood,
why they turned.
What that meant.
My father bought me a huge book, I read it.
Didn't care about the text, I just
looked at the pictures over and over again
and I could see them coming to life.
Deuce the years later,
we were sitting next to each other,
hot cocoa and coffee, the game installing.
"You'll love this", he said,
and my eyes were regaled with the crackling and whistling
of gigantic animated clockwork, all spurry in their richoils.
Because you've made me Love youYou make me laugh,Because you've made me Love you2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
you make me cry,
you make me pretty in my mind
and to everything else, blind.
But out of all the things you do, you've
made me love you.
Like your shadow when you walk
past, I follow the steps you take, I
walk in your shoes, I
understand you. Sometimes it's
not as comfortable as I
would like but I do it because you've
made me love you.
I know that my jokes aren't funny
and that I may be sensitive and emotional
and I'm not really anybody beautiful
and as positive as you make me be for you I
still see the truth in the world.
Even if it's not happy but you've
made me love you.
And I'd do anything for you.
But you don't know I love you the way I do and in fact you
must not know. Because I fear you wouldn't love me
Not the way I love you.
I'll never tell you until you tell me first but,
but what if you're just feeling the same about me but
what if you're thinking these same thoughts then
who goes first?
you wouldn't love me. Not in a
a sliver of the galaxyto the star girl on the edge of my tongue:a sliver of the galaxy2 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
your hair dye is fading; you are a patch work
quilt comprised of sleepless nights and
the world around you romanticizes
the sadness that fills you like a broken well,
but you know they’re wrong --
having a darkness that threatens
to overwhelm you every single moment
isn’t glamorous at all.
you’ve started to trace your skin
with a knife again, itching to press
a little harder, to draw on your body
the only way you know how.
but you won’t.
because that will mean
that you’re just as far gone
as they think you are.
and there’s still a sliver inside of you
that doesn’t want to let go.
--the girl on the other side of your mirror
The Girl and the ChildThere was a girlThe Girl and the Child1 year ago in Free Verse More Like This
And there was child
The girl dreamed of loss
And the child played until the late hours of the morning
The girl was sad and lonely
And the child still clung to everything she had
The girl was tired and done
And the child was afraid to grow up
The girl missed the child
And the child missed the girl
One day the girl left her heart on the child's doorstep
And then retreated into the shadows
The child held it in her hands
The child searched for years and years
But she found nothing
She finally fell to her knees never to get up again
The girl came out of the shadows
And saw the child on the floor
And she wept until she had no more tears
And once she cried her eyes, she laid there beside the child
And stared into the dark that now consumed her
The girl nodded for mother and laughed for father
Did for brother and worked for grandfather
But she cried for herself
Until no more light shined
And she was just another lump on the bed
The girl did not know how unhappy she w
Forget-me-not #2You're a little blue flower flourishing in my headForget-me-not #22 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
nourished by all the things between us left unsaid
WitchcraftCall me SarahWitchcraft9 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
was all she said
and I had the uncomfortable
feeling of being haunted.
I let her legs
and red nails
do the talking -
stories I grew up
not believing in,
silver spoons and moons
hung so low
I could taste them,
and autumn lost
between her shoulders.
I never said the right words
and night retreated
when she turned her head
We let the candles burn -
rich foliage of air
the only traces left.
Prince's Wish - 1 of 3Prince's Wish (1/3)Prince's Wish - 1 of 33 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
AN: This story contains: weight gain of the male variety and stuffing.
You can't deal with that? Have you met mister [x] at the corner of the screen? He will show you the exit
"More!" the cook commanded and more food was shoved down the funnel that was in Saki's mouth and down his throat.
This was already the fifth big dinner session, but he still felt like bursting as more food stretched his stomach. His belly bloated up in front of him, heavy with all sorts of meals and fattening desserts. Slow circles were rubbed on the stretched and taunt skin to help ease the pain as much as possible, but it was no helping, considered by how fast the food went down the funnel.
He groaned as his stomach grew yet rounder again. But maybe in a few weeks it would all be better. After all he was chosen by the prince and this all was an honour.
Three weeks later the new roundness in front of him felt better. It was still strange
Bipolar DisorderLook over your shoulder. They're watching you.Bipolar Disorder2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Tighten your stomach muscles.
Bounce your leg up and down.
"Are you okay?"
Don't say anything.
Feel it, feel the thoughts melting from your mind.
"What are you doing?"
They're behind you.
Kill them before they kill you.
Please save me.
Crazy. You're crazy.
No one wants you.
Pull the trigger.
"Please tell me what's wrong."
You wouldn't understand.
"Who are you? I don't know you anymore."
I'm a nobody.
I am Bipolar Disorder.
... "I don't know."
EmpyreanMomma said to never marry an astronaut,Empyrean1 year ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
they will always prefer the twinkling starlight
to the light in your eyes.
They'll only end up in ships that float
aimlessly in zero gravity and you will not be there.
Momma said to never marry an astronaut.
You will stand firmly on the earth,
clutching the ground and knowing
they will always prefer the twinkling starlight.
Planets will fracture and stars will collapse
long before he recognizes he can travel
to the light in your eyes.
My Chubby Pig: Part IMy Chubby PigMy Chubby Pig: Part I4 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Leor had always been obsessed with cute things. Cute animals were his favorite, and he collected the like coins. Leor was a prince, the 6th in the line to the heir, and so money was not an issue. By the time Leor was twelve, he had a harem of animals. However, all of his pets seemed to have one thing in common: within a year of being purchased, their weight nearly doubled. The servants who worked at the castle were mystified at the sixty pound cats and nearly a hundred pound dogs, and they couldn't even guess the weight of Leor's pony. The prince, however, saw no problem with this.
"Doesn't it just make them cuter?!" He would ask excitedly as he used both arms and most of his strength to pick up one of his cats.
It was obvious that Leor actually thought this, and kept all of his animals fed to the point of bursting. The animals received so much attention from Leor and the servants, they were probably the most spoiled beasts in the kingdom. Each one was simple a w
HurtLies stacked upon each other,Hurt2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
A disgraceful factory.
Hurt being passed around,
A disease that spreads so easily.
Lust that finally awakens,
A sinful need.
We’ve created our own kingdom,
We’ve buried our own graves.
There is no turning back,
No back button to press.
A stinging feeling,
As the reality seems more unpleasant.
The salvation looked for won’t be found,
There is no happy end.
The only salvation I see is the one,
With the gun against your temple.
Something Ugly and Something BeautifulThere was just me-Everything that I didSomething Ugly and Something Beautiful2 months ago in Free Verse More Like This
Everything that I was
Nothing else but all that I amAnd then there was something else-A crack of something
A smudge of something
Something else beneathAnd it grew-The something you introduced
Overwhelmed my everything
Revealing something newAnd it unveiled something ugly-But with every crack
And every smudge
You made it beautifulAnd then I understood.
M o n s t e rM o n s t e r4 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
Delight Drive. The street's very name explained how every house looked. Each one was painted with bright, cheery colors; a reflection of its owner. Every lawn was trimmed and watered to perfection; every flowerbed overrun with all sorts of tulips, daffodils, peonies, roses, and each bed was completely devoid of weeds. Each fence was lined with flawlessly pruned hedges. And the homes themselves seemed to emit a feeling of warmth and comfort.
It made Zacky sick. It was too happy, too disconcerting. No one seemed to have a mind of their own. Every basic idea was the same.
Zackary Baker never considered himself to be goth, but he couldn't understand how so many people enjoyed these colors. They were too bright. He knew that not everyone liked darker shades, as he did, but this was too much.
As Zacky trudged home from school, he glanced up at the clouds, keeping an eye out for rain. If it did he was in trouble. His hom
Let People InI used to hate people so much because they're so quick to judge and betray each other. They'll say they're your friends, but then ignore you or shun you when it stops being convenient or fun for them. They use you as much as they can, and when they're done with you they all just disappear. I didn't want to have friends like that, and I thought I didn't need them. I thought that, but it wasn't right at all. I thought I was stronger, rejecting relationships and friends. But once you reject people, you're stuck. You lose the opportunity to make those connections that define your life. And when you've lost those chances, you don't get them back.Let People In2 years ago in Emotional More Like This
I found someone like me to share my pain with. She's still one of the most special and important people in my life. She always will be.
Whenever you meet that person, whether they're a friend, a lover, or a family member, don't turn them away.
Up until recently, that's all I've ever done. I've tried to build trusting friendships, romances... and it
RiskI reached to grab your waiting handRisk1 year ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
You pull away again
I stretched just like a rubber band
And failed under the strain
It`s like a game of chess we play
We move our pieces round
As rook takes knight, we play the game
But then the moves run out
I don't know why we dance and dance
In circles like we do
You hate the risk, I want the chance
To prove it all to you
But in the end, it ends the same
These things, they often do
I try to play, I lose the game
And now I'm losing you
© Jarrett Douglass DeLude
Miles Away-GermanyxReader~~Backstory~~ 5 years after happily marrying your true love, Ludwig Beildschmit, he was suddenly called out for an abrupt war mission. He had been in the army for a while now, even as you were dating. He sometimes were called out, but never to fight. He wasn't due to leave for another month, but the news hit you like a bullet. It's been a month since he was called, and it is the day for him to leave.Miles Away-GermanyxReader2 years ago in Romance More Like This
"I pack my bags & say goodbye to my wife for what seems like the millionth time. They said it gets easier, but they lied."
"Ludwig.." You managed to croak, tears in your eyes, but you resisted the urge to bawl in front of him. Your handsome, tall husband looked down at you, his baby blue eyes full of sorrow. A half-assed smile tugged at his lips as he reached for you, his strong arms pulling you into a warm embrace, where you dug your ace into his chest, not wanting to leave.
"____, I have to go, a-and you know zhat.." His strong German accent always got you. You felt h
fallingi.falling3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
i met you in fall
while i was too busy
with the changing leaves
and the changing tides
to notice the shocking
blue of your eyes
when i did
the sun was as high
as we were and the
sky azure as they
the next season i
needed your warmth
it wilted with the trees
a gap between us filled
with silence and cold
in sync with the
world like dying
last year we couldn't
touch without breaking
my own rules and i
dreamt every night of
reaching out and
closing that gap again
and i missed you
more than the sun
or it's warmth
this year i've been
too long untouched
too much unknown
to die with the season
or mourn your warmth
so i'm flying to you
in your endless summer
Crossed Times 7 - ContactCrossed Times 7 - Contact4 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Chapter 7 - Contact
Altiar sighed as he tossed and turned around in his bed for the fifth time tonight; no matter what he wanted, it seemed his restless mind would not allow him to sleep. Sighing softly the Arabian male slid out of bed; he was wearing practically nothing but the assassin didn't seem to mind; the curtains were drawn and it was dark in the room you could barely see the outline of the furniture the only light coming from the glow of the digital clock next to his bed told him it was 4:45am.
Altiar frowned a bit and started to pace around in his room; what was he going to do? There was no way he could face Alex, he wouldn't be able to look the man in the eye! Hell he could barely look at Dana right now without knowing that her brother was watching his every move; if he didn't know any better he'd say Alex's paranoia was rubbing off on him.
Ever since Alex kissed him he had been avoiding the other, and for good reason! He didn't know why
re: chromesthesiaon the body and proprioceptionre: chromesthesia2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
as subjected to
upon inspection of varying souls
and sounds, this
that at a certain frequency
the ribs expand to make
more room for reverberations--
that the sternum shakes
as pillars do--
that the chest lifts in an attitude
of breathless expectation--
and that at a particular, powerful wavelength,
all subjects reported that they had never felt more impaled
upon their own spines.
ten years ago.ten years ago iten years ago.6 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
knew i was still
a romantic because
my dreams were still
filled with white dresses
and golden rings and
now, i know i am
a skeptic because
i am haunted by
and heated passion
and the faces
real, too real.
Cat LadyWhen I grow oldCat Lady3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I will be the crazy cat lady
all the neighbors talk about.
I will dwell
in a house of sycamore
and live off taffy and gin,
and paint my ceilings yellow.
I will dangle carrots
off the clothesline
and only bathe on Sundays.
I will keep 47 cats
(or maybe 63)
and give them names
like Cumberbund and Camembert
and let them sleep in the kitchen sink
where they can dream of midnight raids
on the pantry-
of sardines poached in pepper sauce
and mocking bird and beetle pie
and we will fish off the crumbling pier.
I will tie bells to their tails
to warn the birds
they are invited for a meal
and watch them flying over
their wings a tell tale
sigh of autumn weather.
And at night we will curl
up on the porch
fur bristling under blankets
and October's jumbled moon
to dream of chasing
mice among the rafters.