Warrior Boot Camp - Dwalin X ReaderWarrior Boot Camp - Dwalin X Reader1 year ago in Humor More Like This
"Rest, all of you. Tomorrow will be an intense day for everyone. If we expect to succeed in our quest, we have to be in shape" said Thorin Oakenshield, whose word is law and no one dares question his authority. He nodded to Dwalin, who returned the nod, as he chose his corner to sleep, always apart from the rest. You began to whisper to Bilbo, who was just as clueless as yourself,
"What exactly does he mean by being in shape?" you asked.
"I have no idea" replied Bilbo equally whispering. "but if all this long walk is not enough of an exercise, then I do not know what it is."
"Indeed, I feel my legs are swelling" you said to Bilbo.
"Lads, it is best if you save your energies by sleeping, instead of talking. Leave your worries aside." said Balin, who overheard the two of you whispering.
You blushed and then asked shyly, "I do not know what a dwarf training is like, should I worry?"
"Not really, you will be fine I promise. Now rest, lass." replied Balin to ease you down.
SO FLUFFY!!!-Hobbit Characters X Reader"Oh my goodness! Look at them, they are so cute!" You squealed happily.SO FLUFFY!!!-Hobbit Characters X Reader10 months ago in Humor More Like This
"That they are, lass." Bofur agreed.
"And they're so fluffy, too." Ori said.
"They're so fluffy, I can't even stand it." Fili said.
"They're so fluffy, I'm gonna die!" Kili said. You all agreed with him on that.
"What are you all doing over here?" Thorin asked as he and the others approached you, Fili, Kili, Ori and Bofur who were sitting around in a small group.
"This is what we are doing, uncle." Fili replied. You all move aside to reveal a litter of about a dozen bunny rabbits with their mother, who, surprisingly, was willing to let you play with her babies.
"Aw! How adorable!" Bilbo said, sitting down next to you as you handed him a tiny, fluffy bunny with brown fur.
Some of the other members of the company sat down with you and joined in. Bombur laid himself down on his back to let Bofur put one of the bunnies on his big belly. Bifur was transfixed by a little black and white patchwork bunny and started
Hope comes softly-Dwalin X ReaderHope comes softly-Dwalin X Reader10 months ago in General Fiction More Like This
Note: This is a sequel to 'For Her', my other Dwalin X Reader. Be warned, this story may cause severe liquidation of the cardiac muscle (melting of the heart).
Dwalin wandered through the halls of Erebor, looking over the familiar walls and images that he had not seen in many years. He remembered it all just the way it was before the dragon attacked, so full of life and warmth; so full of hope.
This was his home. A home that he wasn't sure he would ever see again. But now, here he was, walking through its halls, deep in thought and lost in memory. You'd think that he would feel happy and joyful at finally having returned. But, he didn't. Being back felt strange and somewhat gloomy. Because he knew what the cost was. He knew exactly what it took and what was lost to get them all there.
It had been one month since the Battle of Five Armie
Avengers x Reader Sleepover! pt. 2Avengers (and Loki) x Reader sleepover! pt. 2Avengers x Reader Sleepover! pt. 21 year ago in Humor More Like This
You ran into your room and got changed into your Dalmatian onesie. "Heeheehee this is going to be so much fun!" You squealed in delight. You walked into your bathroom and brushed your teeth, then you put your hair up in a loose, messy bun. You grabbed your duvet, a blanket and a few pillows before exiting your room once again.
Steve and Clint were already in the sitting room when you got there. Clint was wearing a plain t shirt and baggy sweatpants, while Steve was wearing American flag pyjamas. You walked over and sat between Steve and Clint, who were playing a game on Tonys Xbox. " I love your pjs Steve. They're so cute!" Steve blushed at the complement. "Awww, thanks (y/n)." He shyly replied. You watched Steve attempt to play against Clint in some sort of racing game. He was loosing, obviously. Steve still had no idea on how to work modern day technology, even though he's been unfrozen for almost two years now.
"Aw, Clint you know I can'
Fili's New brother - A fanfictionFíli sat quietly and listened, though all he wanted to do was put his hands over his ears. His heart was beating hardly, like a great hammer, as he sat waiting outside the chamber. His feet tapped the wooden wall behind him.Fili's New brother - A fanfiction1 year ago in Short Stories More Like This
He was scared for his mother, for she was not well. That was all he knew for certain. Something was terribly wrong with her. Why else would she scream like that in the room next door?
He was afraid, and yet he yearned to ease her pain. Had he been but as big as his uncle, sitting beside him now, he would have fought for her life. He would have killed what was hurting her now. Had he only been older, and not the five years of age that he was.
His uncle, Thorin, put a hand on his shoulder, as if he could feel Fílis fear.
“Be strong for your mother, Fíli, for she needs all the strength she can get.” His voice was soft, but when Fíli looked up at his uncle, Thorin had hard eyes, full of worry. His smile didn’t reach
An Unexpected Visit - Part 3The love of a motherAn Unexpected Visit - Part 31 year ago in Drama More Like This
Tauriel had slept for a while. An uneasy sleep with dark thoughts and worries. She was either too hot or too cold, and the contractions would rise and fall like a fiery tide, burning her body with sharp pain. She didn’t know how long these pains would last before the child would be ready to come, yet she hoped it would be quick.
The old dwarf was sitting in the corner by the hearth, snoring, waking every hour by Tauriel’s exclaims, and then informing her it was still a while before the child was ready.
Tauriel woke suddenly again. The fire was burning her lower abdomen and tears of sweat were rolling down her forehead and chest. Her fingers dug into the sheets beneath her, and she cried from a pain she could do nothing about.
Tauriel hurled the animal skins away, for she felt like she was being suffocated.
«Are you sure that is wise, my dear? The room is quite cold still,» a soft voice spoke suddenly.
Tauriel was startled and met the ey
Elvenking's beautyElvenking's beauty1 year ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Snow-white, oh snow-white
Like jewels of pure starlight
Are silky hair so long
Of our noble elven lord
Like evenstar of midnight sky
Are jewels bright
On hands of Mirkwood’s king
Our lord of light
Sitting upon throne of old
Dressed in long silver gown
On beautiful hair glitters crown
Of nobles of the kings
Pure shining eyes
Like midnight stars
More blue than the sea, you may think
Is noble look of the elvenking
His crown so bright
his face so fair
Such beauty he posses
Charm in every move he makes
As I stare at the king
Who throws away his red cloak
I hear his voice so close to me
„I’m patient. I can wait…“
Even in Death"With the Battle of Five Armies fall the heirs of Durin's line."Even in Death2 years ago in Drama More Like This
Balin looked away from the horizon and at his brother's face. Dwalin's face was solemn, sad. As it should be after such an occurrence. The battle had cost them much. Thorin Oakenshield had been their leader, the dwarf they had followed to the very end. A dwarf who should have been King Under the Mountain. Instead his life had been cut short at the swing of a sword, and with him died his nephews, his only heirs.
Inwardly, Balin sighed. Durin's heirs...dwarves who had shown so much potential, only to have their lives snuffed out in one single battle. Dwarves who had seemed to be able to endure anything and anyone. But nothing lasted forever.
"Thorin, Fili and Kili were strong," Balin said softly. "True, Fili and Kili had little experience in real battle, but they were so very talented...I do not believe Durin's heirs would have fallen this day had it not been the will of almighty Iluvatar. They would have lived on, and rule
Kili and Tauriel - Could you love me? A fanfictionKíli wasn't sure what to do or say when he looked upon the beautiful, tall elf maiden. As a dwarf he was neither tall nor beautiful, unlike the elven men this maiden must normally be courted by. He was therefore unsure if her feelings were like his, or of another nature.Kili and Tauriel - Could you love me? A fanfiction1 year ago in Romance More Like This
He was shorter than her by a head, and far less beautiful. Kíli wasn't even a mature dwarf by the standard of his own kin. He was still young at 77 years of age, and his beard wouldn't grow in full yet. Tauriel was as complete as any mature woman could be, or so he believed.
When he laid his eyes upon her he felt as though his insides were melting gold, and he felt his mouth dry, as no words could escape him. She was fairer than any gem or stone he had ever seen. She was shining brighter than Mithril, and her skin was clearer than any diamond. It looked as smooth as well, and he yearned to touch it.
When Tauriel then took his hand he was even more dumbstruck, and he had to lick his lips before being able to u
At Your Side -- The Battle of the Five Armies SongDo not fear, my loveAt Your Side -- The Battle of the Five Armies Song10 months ago in Songs & Lyrics More Like This
As arrows rain down from above
I will be your shield
When enemies refuse to yield
As the darkness closes in
I will be there
Don't give in
Dodging scarlet swords
Tears rolling from the grief of war
Seeing allies fall
I try to reach your desperate call
When everything but fear has died
I will stand close
At your side
At the sound of horns
My fears of losing you reborn
When all hope is lost
Nothing lessens the painful cost
As blood puddles at our feet
I'll lie with you
As we sleep
A Beginners Guide On How To Be Majestic- Or how to become the dwarf you´ve always wanted to be. -A Beginners Guide On How To Be Majestic2 years ago in Humor More Like This
1. Be gruff.
2. Be proud of your size. Never wear high heels unless you need to peak over a wall out of strategic (or voyeuristic) reasons.
3. Eat. A lot. Never refuse an invitation to dinner.
4. Spill as much of your ale as possible while drinking.
5. Avoid silly songs.
6. Look into the distance, if convenient. If inconvenient look anyways.
7. Unless it would kill you. Obviously.
8. Wear dead animals´ skins and furs. Eat the rest. A dwarf does not join PETA. Nor does he become vegetarian. Or even vegan (for he´s not an elf).
9. Avoid elves. They´re sparkly and hug trees. And ride moose.
10. Imitate your pony´s latest hairstyle.
11. If you have the chance to let your hair flow in the wind, do so.
12. Never cut your beard unless you´re in mourning.
13. When you´re in battle, keep your weapons in the best possible shape.
14. Beards extensions are a big no-go. A proudly worn growing beard is more honourable than a cowardly di
Lament for HaldirLament for Haldir1 year ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
Oh, Haldir of Lothlórien
The fair captain of the elves
Brave like thousands of the men
Skilled in fighting with a sword
With gentle smile on his face
In his hand he held the sword
Wore golden armor and red cloak
His eyes were blue as the sea
So handsome he seemed to me
I saw him marching to Helm’s Deep, and I knew
I won’t see him anymore
He looked so deeply in my eyes, and said
„Wait for me in Valinor“
I couldn’t hide tears in my eyes, for I knew
He won’t return anymore
I heared his voice in my ears, as he said
„Wait for me there on the shore“
Then he entred city’s gates
With elven soldiers by his side
And he said he came once more
Honour allegiance of old days
I saw him standing on the walls
He so noble seemed to be
Holding elven bow in his hands
Silky hair flowing in the wind
I saw him fighting with long sword
This great and skilled warrior
Such courage there he showed
He slayed many of the orcs
Suddenly I saw him on his kn
An Advanced Guide On How To Be Majestic- Or how to become the dwarf you´ve always wanted to be - in 50 additional steps. -An Advanced Guide On How To Be Majestic2 years ago in Humor More Like This
1. Know yourself. This will make you appear even more majestic than you already are.
2. Do not, under any circumstances, take the Hobbits to Isengard.
3. Only trust elven blades if there´s no Elf on the blunt end.
4. Be polite to the Lady of Lorien.
5. In fact, to every woman.
6. It might be your mother you´re talking to.
7. If the Hobbit of your choice won´t accept the foot hair curlers you brought him, try giving him a pony.
8. Or food. Hobbits love food.
9. Punch your fellow family members in the ribcage if they talk nonsense. It might save their life.
10. When eagles are around make sure to hug a Hobbit.
11. When entering someone else´s house, do not forget to scratch the dirt off your boots on some antique pieces of furniture.
12. Don´t learn to swim. If you must cross a river, use barrels.
13. When realising a legend is true tell everyone (and risk your life doing it).
14. Wear your hair and beard
An Expert Guide On How To Be Majestic- Or how to become the dwarf you´ve always wanted to be the 50 final steps.An Expert Guide On How To Be Majestic2 years ago in Humor More Like This
1. One does not simply toss a dwarf. It has to be done majestically!
2. And if you have been tossed or tossed one, never tell anyone about it. It´s a majestic secret.
3. If you kill an Orc or Ouarg make sure to take care of it quickly. These things tend to pile up.
4. Never let more than four dwarves climb on a pine tree. It´ll break.
5. Forget Red Bull. Dwarf Ale gives you wings!
6. If your host passes out just party on. He won´t mind.
7. If your host doesn´t want you to use a piece of his furniture be so kind to humour him. You can always sit on it later.
8. Or sit on your host, if he refuses to lend you a chair.
9. Don´t steal your host´s table silver.
10. Some life lessons for you to remember: A doily is not a towel, and crochet is not a game, even if you have the balls for it.
11. If you don´t find your way and are searching a specific house, consider looking at the door. There may be a sign
50 Ways To Drive Akatsuki NutsHow to Drive The ENTIRE Akatsuki nuts, and get them to hate absolutely forever.50 Ways To Drive Akatsuki Nuts8 years ago in Humor More Like This
Or just piss them off real bad. XD
1.)Get Itachi to watch you practice saying thet Sasuke is your foolish little brother and is, therefore, weak.
2.)Steal Deidara's clay bombs and blow up Sasori's puppets. Then, blame on scary carrot martians from mars.
3.)Eat some shark in front of Kisame, make sure you chew really REAAALLLLLYYY slowly, while savoring the taste, then ask him if he wants any.
4.)Give Zetsu a huge bottle of weed-killer, and then ask him to go kill some nasty weeds. Make SURE when you hand it to him, the lid is loose. Then MAKE ABSOLUTELY SURE you drop it all over him and the rest of his coat.
5.) Ask the leader why he is a ghost, and if he say 'I'm not a ghost' then stick your hand through his chest and scream, 'OMG LEADER IS DEAD AND MY HAND IS IN HIS CHEST!!!!'
6.)Send out calls to everyone that the ppl in the Akatsuki hate and then explain to leader that your throwing a party with them in
In Which Kili Enters MirkwoodHis leg stung where the spider had pinched at his boot, trying to drag him from the company.In Which Kili Enters Mirkwood1 year ago in Humor More Like This
But the elves didn’t seem to acknowledge his discomfort, or if they did, they didn’t seem to care.
He wagered the latter was more true.
The company (minus their hobbit) were marched up a long, narrow carved walkway, adorned on either side by spritely willow trees, whose flowers were gently being plucked from the branches by the soft breeze. A massive carven gate loomed ahead of them. Kili watched his uncle stiffen in recognition at their location and the young dwarf prince didn’t have to guess where they were heading and WHO they’d be meeting.
The king of Mirkwood.
The dwarves were prodded up a long, winding walkway that began to arch upwards and Kili’s gaze drifted to admire the tall, spiraling branches and roots that wrapped around the stone walls, marking how plant and rock seemed to meld into one thing.
He frowned at the tall, lithe warrior elf in front o
50 Ways to Piss Off Pein1. Wave a magnet in his face50 Ways to Piss Off Pein7 years ago in Fan Fiction More Like This
2. Ask if he uses all his bodies for an orgy
3. Tell him his eyes are creepy and the Sharingan looks way cooler
4. Call him Yondaime
5. Pretend you believe him to be a shadow
6. Ask if any other shadows can talk, or if hes just magical
7. Tell him one of his bodies looks like a girl
8. Tell him Zetsus hitting on Konan
9. Ask what kind of parents name their kid Pein (It means the same thing in Japanese as pain)
10. Tell him its really lame how all his bodies have the same name, and that as an evil mastermind he should have more creativity.
11. Point out that his eyes look like targets
12. Try to hit them when training with kunai
13. Ask if he needs a hug
14. Tell him his god-complex is just lame and will get him killed
15. Show him Death Note as proof
16. Ask WHY he wants to even take over the world
17. Follow him around constantly
18. If he asks what youre doing, say youre playing Follow the Leader
Echoes in my Mind Ch. 1Chapter 1: ComfortEchoes in my Mind Ch. 13 years ago in General Fiction More Like This
"N-No, please s-stay away ! N-NOOO!!!"
I shot straight up in my bed, wakened by what I realized was my own screams. Dazed and disoriented from sleep, I couldn't remember where I was at first. However, I was suddenly aware of something wrapped around me. With the nightmare so fresh in my mind, and not even sure if I was still dreaming or was awake, I began to panic and struggled to get away; yet I was held firmly, but gently, in place as a voice whispered softly in my ear.
"Shh it's ok, Amber You're safe Everything is alright "
I instantly clung to the figure tightly, relieved to hear his voice and feel him beside me. "B-Basil," I whispered breathlessly, burying my face into his shirt. "I-It's the nightmares again "
"I know, darling, I know," he said quietly, pulling me closer and wrapping his arms tighter around me, trying to comfort me. "It sounded bad. I heard you screaming my name, and I I-I thought " he trailed of
An Old LegendAn Old Legend3 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
Ages long gone and ages long passed
Shades of grey, man's memory fades fast
The glory days told of old
Shines as brightly as silver and gold
Before the dark, before the strife
Before many of the spans of life
There lied the glory that men bore
The gilded light of Westernesse's shore
That era of brilliance, that age of wealth
That time of wisdom and of great health
Those days are passed or so it is said
As now the great kings of lore lie dead
Is there a hope against such reckless hate?
Where does it lie? The enemy's gate
Draws nearer every day
And now there is little that holds him at bay
But still we hold on to legends and tales
What more will we have when the strength of men fails?
There is still one yet who holds the power
To aid this land in its darkest hour.
From father to son, the title has been given
In the shadows these brave people have striven
To drive away the darkness that besets all
While there is still life in them, men shall not fall
I know the king shall come again, f