Perdition Chapter Nine - Dysphoria(What… what is this? Where am I?)
Loki awoke in chains as thick as those of Fenrir’s, and though his stomach rolled with each and every movement, he tugged on them violently. Head swimming, he tried to piece together the events that had led to this: Jötunheim, monster, Thor, throne, Bifrost, Odin, wormhole – ah. Death had been his intention, but who was he to argue with fate? Heavy eyelids finally forced themselves open, and Loki came face to face with a man-skeleton with eyes full of bloodlust and a twisted, toothy smirk. Loki skittered backwards despite himself, but he quickly recovered his courage.
‘How dare you chain me in this manner?’ he roared, a mouse in front of a lion, ‘I am Loki of Asgard, and you will be punished for your crime!’
‘And I am Thanos the Titan!’ it bellowed back, ‘and a whelp like you should mind your tongue before it is ripped out!’
Loki was shocked into silence for a moment, eyeing Tha
Perdition Chapter Six - L'appel du VideThor’s Coronation.Perdition Chapter Six - L'appel du Vide1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Loki had tried to be happy for him – truly! He had! – but all too easily, that familiar bitterness that had filled him in his younger years had risen to the surface. Though most of his hatred was targeted at Odin who had caused him so much grief, Loki could not deny that which he felt in Thor’s presence. The Golden One, the shining beacon of Asgard, most beloved, most treasured, most worthy son, had stood back and watched his torment and his pain. And Loki could neither forget, nor forgive. Did they not think him capable of ruling? True, his magic had been derided as a sly and dishonourable way of winning battles, but nobody had complained when it had saved the kingdom. Loki felt like grabbing his father and shaking him, asking him why he loved Thor so much and he so little. All he wanted was to be Thor’s equal in his eyes, and in the kingdom’s eyes. He knew he wasn’t the rightful heir. But still, it stung to see how much
Perdition Chapter Three - InfandousBreathing harshly, Loki limped up to the palace door, holding a newborn foal. His newborn foal. Though Sleipnir’s weight was almost too much for him to bear in his weakened condition, Loki persisted, frightened that he wouldn’t be able to walk on his eight shaky legs. The guards opened the doors immediately, staring curiously at the disfigured baby and Loki’s tattered clothing. He paid them no mind. Upon entering, Loki turned wearily at a ragged shout of his name, and was nearly bowled over by an exuberant Thor, who flew at him from the staircase. Sleipnir nickered in distress.Perdition Chapter Three - Infandous2 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
‘Brother!’ Thor boomed, ‘Where have you been all these months? I have missed your trickery. And for what reason are you carrying such a foal? Father has ordered that all disabled animals should be killed for their own good.’
Loki hissed threateningly, hitching Sleipnir up in his trembling arms.
‘He is mine!’
Thor stared nonplussed at his brother.
Perdition Chapter Four - EphemeralLoki almost felt secure. Nothing and no one would ever replace his firstborn, his Sleipnir, but Fenrir, Jörmungandr and Hela were slowly healing the hole in his chest. What did it matter that Fenrir preferred the form of a wolf, or that Jör liked being a snake, or that naturally, Hela was half alive and half dead? What did it matter, for they were his children, and he loved them more than anything else? He had hidden them well, he thought, on Jötunheim itself, where even the Aesir loathed to go. In their frozen home his children were happy and free, which was more than could be said for his eldest. From where Loki stood, life was tolerable.Perdition Chapter Four - Ephemeral1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Loki froze where he was stood. That sounded like more than a few people. Hoping it was mere paranoia, he gathered his confused children quickly and changed their appearances to those of normal children, and his own to a female. Just in time, it seemed, as the door crashed down beneath the boots of Asgardian warriors,
Perdition Chapter Eight - ShatterHe had gone too far. He knew that now. These past few months, he had been driven solely by jealousy and bitterness, and like a child chasing a ball rolling down a hill, events had passed out of his control. At first, he had felt a wicked sort of satisfaction as Thor was berated and banished, a vicious pleasure that burnt him from the inside out, as he – Loki! – was the favourite for once. The joy in it was short-lived, however. For the first time in his life, he was uncertain. Though the royal sceptre felt good in his hand, he knew he was not the right person to wield it, for he was untrusted and untrusting, quick of wit, but not of forgiveness, crawling in the shadows cast by his charismatic, incandescent brother. He had caused them all such pain, in the vain hope that it would match that which he had felt, cast aside and deprived of his little ones. His plan, his hopeless, deceitful, delusional plan, that was formed to force them to care for him, had failed.Perdition Chapter Eight - Shatter1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Perdition Chapter Two - Castigation‘Hey, Loki!’Perdition Chapter Two - Castigation2 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
Loki flinched as his name was called roughly, and marked his page with a finger. The Warriors Three did not care for such pastimes, and therefore, neither did Thor. He had heard, and ignored, the clack of wooden swords for hours now - he did not want to engage in their brutish roughhousing.
‘Come and battle with us!’ Fandral all but roared, smacking him hard over the head with his faux-weapon, ‘Or are you just a cowardly Jotun runt?’
At this, Loki’s blood boiled, and he stood in a rage, while Thor and the others sniggered. He stomped over to them, and a sword was shoved in his hand unceremoniously, before he was pushed forward to face Fandral. He did not know how to fight, and they all knew it. Nevertheless, the spar began, and Loki was soon merely attempting to shield himself from bruising blows.
‘I knew it!’ Fandral shrieked triumphantly, ‘One with such meagre sparring skills must surely be a Frost-monster!
Perdition Chapter Seven - SolivagantThere were not words to describe what he had felt when the icy fingers of the nameless Jötun had touched his skin and left it sickly, damning blue. In a second, the endless taunts of childhood aggressors, Odin’s tough-without-the-love parenting style, and his own crushing feelings of difference, finally made hideous, sickening sense. Numb, he had kicked the equally-thrown Frost Giant away from him and fought on, desperate and biting, in the air that suddenly didn’t feel as cold. Oh, he had continued to play his part, of course, as Thor had been cast down to Midgard (not unlike his own precious Jör, but nobody else had mourned his loss, had they?), as Sif and the Warriors Three had nursed their suspicions, yet inside, he was in turmoil.Perdition Chapter Seven - Solivagant1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
‘The Casket wasn't the only thing you took from Jötunheim that day, was it?’
He had torn the truth from Odin, at war with himself. What once was, was no longer, and the old and the new struggled for domina
Perdition Chapter Ten - Tremor‘So… boy-prince,’ Thanos greeted Loki when his swollen eyes could open again, ‘are you ready to take up the task I have asked you to complete?’Perdition Chapter Ten - Tremor1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Loki shuddered, unwilling to say yes, but unable to say no. He bowed his head and lowered his gaze in deference in the hope that it would dissuade Thanos from hurting him further, but his hopes were in vain. One powerful kick to his shattered ribs later, Loki let out a strangled whimper, tears of pain and mortification trickling down his face. One of Thanos’ scaly fingers scraped the tears away roughly, bringing some of the skin from his cheek with it.
‘Weakness will not be tolerated. Sentiment is not for the worthy.’
Thanos gripped his neck and pulled him upright by it, forcing him to rest his weight on fractured ankles. Loki gasped, biting his tongue until it bled.
‘I ask again, monster. Are you ready? Are you ready to betray your family, and your realm for our cause?’
Perdition Chapter One - The LonelyAll his life, he’d been the underdog. A thinker amongst warriors, a trickster in a world of those who hated tricks. And prince though he may have been by title, it was evident to all that he was not well loved. Not by his so-called parents, not by Thor. Not by anybody. And for so very long, he had wondered – why was it that he was different? Why was Thor worth so much more than he?Perdition Chapter One - The Lonely2 years ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
The answer only revealed itself many years later, and by then, of course, he could no longer be saved.
The cell in which he lay was decidedly claustrophobic, all unforgiving stone and fathomless darkness. Loki stared into the abyss, feeling as if the walls were pressing in on him. Part of him wished they truly would, and end his misery. He remained motionless on the frigid ground as footsteps approached his cage, holding his breath and listening to heeled boots tap out a staccato rhythm, echoing through lonely corridors like bell tolls in a clock tower. His fingers s
Perdition Chapter Eleven - BrontideHe was delirious with power; it thrummed through him like the centre of a warp core.Perdition Chapter Eleven - Brontide1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Thanos had commanded that he take control of this realm, and so it would be done. As he stood on the Tesseract platform, it did not matter that he was wracked with shivers, that he was covered in cold sweat, nor that he had not eaten or slept in weeks. The little voice that whispered urgently in the back of his mind was drowned out by a sickly rush of bloodlust, directed towards the human scum that dared to stand in Thanos’ way.
‘Sir, please put down the spear!’
He considered his weapon for a moment. They thought he would hold such a primitive arm as a spear? His attack on the one-eyed man was justified for his irreverent demand, and those who leapt to his defence were similarly incriminated. He fought with a strength he had not had in years, less desperation and more clean, sharp brutality – a style that Odin would surely be proud of. He chose the marksman as his pawn for hi
Perdition Chapter Twenty One - Recrudescence‘You must fix this!’Perdition Chapter Twenty One - Recrudescence1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Odin was all fury and spittle as he towered over Loki, who had to let his nails bite into his palms hard to stop himself from shaking. Loki didn’t understand why the burden rested on him, as it was not he who the blame lay with. As they were newly settled at Asgard, Odin had asked a builder to fortify their defences by building a wall. A number of Asgardians (Loki suspected Thor was somehow involved), had bet that the builder would not be able to finish within three seasons, and had stupidly offered the builder the prize of Lady Freyja of Vanaheimr if he could do so. What they had not taken into account was his stallion, Svaðilfari, whose power was unparalleled, and the builder was dangerously close to completing his task. Loki had had nothing to do with said bet, but, as always, it had collectively been decided that he was at fault. And here he stood, not even an adult in the eyes of Midgard, quailing beneath his father’s misplaced r
Perdition Chapter Nineteen - BeleaguermentThere was silence in the room – bar Loki’s quiet sniffling and the rasping turn of pages – magnified by the distant laughing and shrieking of Thor and his friends. He had been refused entry to their special club yet again, and humiliated to boot. Who would have known that Volstagg’s older brother was lurking round the corner as Loki spat his first (and last) painful insult? Either way, the maids would be angry at the blood dripping steadily on to the bed and Father would be angry that Loki couldn’t be like the other children and Thor would be angry because he’d been shown up by his little brother again, and so Loki was crying. He was crying in the ugly way young children often do, with the tears sliding uncomfortably down his neck and past his collar, and the snot bubbling up until he felt it drip down his philtrum, and disgustedly wiped it away with his finely decorated sleeve. Prince or not, he was still only a boy.Perdition Chapter Nineteen - Beleaguerment1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
He wasn’t reading the m
Perdition Chapter Twelve - NovitiousThor dragged him from the aeroplane and threw him into a jagged wall of rock. Loki lay crumpled at the bottom, gasping. A spark of fear and of fury was lit in the back of his head, though it was suppressed by the drive to follow his orders.Perdition Chapter Twelve - Novitious1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Thor raved at him like a madman (you always had a temper, dear one), but Loki parried the verbal blows with vicious words of his own, tongue twisting as he spat out what would hurt most. There was no reason Thor would notice anything different about him, for he too was convinced of the image of ‘Liesmith’, hateful, treacherous, mutinous. The shrieking voice in his mind beneath the fog rose to a steady wail
(BROTHER, LOVE, BROTHER, LOVE!)
but Loki pushed it away with little effort, savouring the expression of pain and betrayal on Thor’s face as he hissed out yet more bile. ‘Imagined slights’, yes ‘imagined slights’ how dare he? How dare he? He knew nothing of Loki whatsoev
Perdition Chapter Fifteen - SaudadeLoki’s throat burned from screaming, his eyes bloodshot and sticky to the touch. He cursed himself internally for staying silent when it had mattered to speak – perhaps Thor might have listened? No. No, the rift between them had grown too large. He felt it as a wound in his chest, open and festering, unstitched and unhealed. He ached for repentance, for life as it once was, when he knew nothing but his family, and the stinging taunts of others were soothed by Thor’s mere shining presence. But now he had nothing.Perdition Chapter Fifteen - Saudade1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
For the first time he surveyed his surroundings. His cell was small and dingy, the flagstones beneath his thinly-soled boots were freezing, and he could see very little in the oppressive darkness. He was still leant against the door, so with monumental effort, he dragged himself away, shuffling into a corner in the vain hope that the intersection would yield more heat. Odin had ripped all but the scraps of his magic away from him, yet Loki managed to dredge
Perdition Chapter Thirteen - Contrition‘He will make you long for something as sweet as pain.’Perdition Chapter Thirteen - Contrition1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
The words echoed through Loki’s mind, battling with the cloying wave of calm and obedience that fell over him like a blanket, warm, yet somehow suffocating. He quivered imperceptibly under the harsh gaze of Thor, facing him down on top of Stark Tower. They had clashed fiercely, as on the Bifrost, only this time, Loki noticed, Thor was much less inclined towards sympathy. As the humans were preoccupied with the Chitauri forces, he and his brother had fought savagely – Thor for the sake of Midgard, Loki, with the sweet whispers of Thanos in his ears, for the sake of having nothing left to lose, and all too much to avoid. And then, he was caught, and a strong hand forced his gaze towards the ruined city.
‘Look at this! Look around you! You think this madness will end with your rule?’
To Loki’s addled mind, Thor’s words were confusing and uncomfortable, and he tried to wrench his head
Perdition Chapter Fourteen - TraducementGagged, shackled and helpless, Loki allowed himself to be dragged by Thor. The ‘Avengers’ (or so they called themselves) followed behind with an air of superiority that would have infuriated Loki under different circumstances. Now, however, he was reticent. He was still trying to piece together his fractured mind, sorting between his own thoughts and emotions, and those ugly echoes of Thanos’.Perdition Chapter Fourteen - Traducement1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
He stiffened in terror. He had considered briefly the horrors that might be bestowed on him by his father, but he had not thought of Thanos’ retribution. Surely it would be terrible – when they could steal him away from Asgard, that is. Shivering, he raised his gaze to Thor’s to try and gauge his situation. Thor, as always, was an open book, but when Loki looked at him now, he saw things that had not being directed at him before. Thor thrummed with repressed fury, and his demeanour was colder than Jötunheim. He seemed thoroughly unfeeling as he held
Perdition Chapter Twenty Two - DysphoriaThe deed was done, but not as he intended. Svaðilfari had been distracted alright, enough to chase him around for three days until he finally submitted to-Perdition Chapter Twenty Two - Dysphoria1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
It was of no consequence. Or so he told himself. Loki, still in his mare form, collapsed on the grass in a field on the outskirts of Asgard. He was too exhausted to shift back into his Aesir form, and too far from the palace to return there as he was, so he simply lay there, wallowing in his own misery. How could he go back to his father and tell him he’d been violated by a horse? He’d be laughed out of Asgard! No, he would tell no one. He would return to the palace and endure, as he always had done. And it was with that wretched thought that he finally fell asleep.
He was disorientated when he woke the next morning in his mare form, but when he had gathered his senses, he believed he had enough energy to try transforming back. Hauling himself unsteadily to his feet, he let the magic flow through him, but instead
Perdition Chapter Sixteen - NemesismWhat he wouldn’t do for some water. Just a drop. Just a tiny sip of that glorious liquid to soothe his dry throat and swollen tongue. The guards hadn’t turned up for weeks now. He would have assumed the whole dungeon was abandoned if only he couldn’t hear the rhythmic pound of patrolling feet echoing down the corridor. Somehow, that made it worse. His stomach growled uncomfortably, clenching though there was nothing to digest. He had long since eaten every last crumb of what remained on the abandoned tray on the other side of the room, but still he stared longingly at it, imagining with ravenous clarity a plate full of the wonderful feast food at the tables of Odin. Rich, succulent pork, thick, warm broth, bread with butter melted into it – oh! For a slice of bread.Perdition Chapter Sixteen - Nemesism1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Of course, food and drink weren’t absolutely necessary for his survival. He was a God, after all. But he still felt the hunger pangs and desperate thirst of a human. He could feel his body e
Perdition Chapter Twenty Five - HalcyonSigyn was a delight. Her big, blue eyes and long, golden hair masked the sharp wit and intelligence of one much more suited to sorcery than battle, and for the first time, Loki found himself falling head over heels in love. They were married in beautiful Vanaheim, where even the flowers seemed agreeable, and Loki could ignore the disapproval of those who wanted her to marry one of their own. Though Mother had begged him to return with her to Asgard after the wedding, he had refused. After all, what was his was so often mistreated in his homeland, and he wouldn’t let that happen to his sweet Sigyn. It turned out he wouldn’t have to.Perdition Chapter Twenty Five - Halcyon10 months ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
She fell pregnant in the winter, and by spring she was blooming, all burgeoning belly and gentle smiles. When Mother visited and rested her hands on that blessed stomach, she foretold the birth of twin boys, which both excited and worried Loki. Two more children threatened by Odin. That was, of course, if Frigga was right. Sigyn laboured in th
Perdition Chapter Twenty Four - SanguinaryWhen Mother had told him that she was going to visit her family in Vanaheim, Loki jumped at the chance to go with her. He had long tired of the stifling walls of the palace, with its war games and spiteful courtiers, and his mother’s people had always seemed to be more enlightened than the Aesir. Vanaheim was beautiful, but in a different way to Asgard. In contrast to the towering spires and glistening waters he was used to, he was met with an altogether more rustic charm. Verdant green surrounded the stone walls of castles, brooks babbling their way through lush forests containing creatures of which Loki had never seen the like. It was wonderful, like the tales Mother had read to him as a child. Why ever had she left this place?Perdition Chapter Twenty Four - Sanguinary11 months ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
While Mother spent time with her distant relations, negotiating treaties, and marriage proposals, Loki spent his days wandering the woods in search of some peace. She had made vague inquiries about the possibility of a marriage of his own, but Loki ha
Perdition Chapter Thirty Visceral‘Loki! Wait!’Perdition Chapter Thirty Visceral8 months ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
He stiffened, and stayed his feet, pushing back the fury that was inspired by that voice. He had run off before all the courses had been served, already feeling miserable as Odin toasted Thor for the twelfth time, spilling his cup of mead. It wasn’t the only to be spilled, of course. The court was filled with animals. Thor never refused an offer of food, so Loki had thought himself to be safe to slip away without attracting attention. Apparently not.
‘Nervous, brother?’ he asked, mouth twisting sourly as he remained facing away from him.
‘Nervous? Whatever have I to be nervous about?’
When Thor caught up, his greeting involved a resounding slap to the back that sent him pitching forwards, stumbling to regain his balance. The acidic glare he threw Thor in response was enough to make him flinch, so he muted it ever so slightly. ‘You are the devoted brother’ he reminded himself.
Once under control, he draw
Perdition Chapter Twenty Six - StygianThe grief consumed him entirely. He spent his days alternately weeping, confined to his room, and begging his mother for Vali back. She withstood his pleading with tears of her own, telling him that it was not her decision, that she couldn’t do anything to help him, and before long, it was clear she could hardly bear to be in the same room as him. So he bade her go in a screaming rage, hurling poisonous words and precious trinkets alike, and she did not return to the prison he had ensconced himself in.Perdition Chapter Twenty Six - Stygian10 months ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
The first time Thor came to visit, with sad eyes and wringing hands, he apologised for his loss and told him not to upset Mother. Loki fell on his back, screaming with hysterical laughter until his lungs burned and his sides ached, pulling, clawing, tearing the bedclothes beneath him. When he opened his streaming eyes, Thor was gone.
Once, they sent Odin in. After weeks of isolation, his outbursts had finally taken their toll, and he lay on his bed, prostrate and exhauste
Perdition Chapter Twenty - EquanimityThe high-pitched giggles coming from the vacant daughter of an inept lord grated on Loki’s last nerve. Irritated beyond belief, he raised his head from his arithmetic to glare at the vapid wench perched precariously on his preening brother’s lap. Thor caught his eye as his hand travelled somewhere dangerously close to obscene, and winked. Scowling, Loki returned to his sums. Thor was not fond of arithmetic. Nor indeed, of languages, history, politics, astronomy, medicine, or any other academic pursuit. All he cared about was fighting, women and mead. He had been allowed to finish his studies before he reached manhood, so hopeless was he at concentrating, and took up combat training in earnest. Day and night, Loki heard the unmistakable grunts of unsubtle offences, and the clashing of swords rang in his ears as if it were part of his biology.Perdition Chapter Twenty - Equanimity1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
Thor had a good reason to be celebrating, however: he had just won his first battle as leader of the army in Vanaheim. In his
Perdition Chapter Eighteen - SaviourThe tears had dried on his face, leaving meandering lines of pale skin amidst the grime. He knew somewhere in his mind that his children were hallucinations of some sort, possibly even conjured by Odin to torment him – he did not know. All that he was sure of was that he was slipping into a sort of madness that not even Thor would be there to save him from.Perdition Chapter Eighteen - Saviour1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
It was early evening, though Loki couldn’t tell in his cage, and the changing of the guard could be heard outside the door. In earlier days, he had called out to them, but he had given up on that futile venture pretty quickly when it was clear no one would respond. He had begun to draw listlessly in the dust by his feet when he heard a commotion in the corridor. Footsteps thundered down the hallway, punctuated by sickening cracks and agonising screams. Loki scrambled to his feet, heart pounding, all too aware that he was defenceless without his magic. He drew himself back into his corner in fear, fists balled and rais
Perdition Chapter Twenty Three - InexorableSo it wasn’t exactly conventional. But Loki didn’t care very much. Angrboða was everything his father hated, and so naturally, Loki had fallen upon her like a starving dog would a leg of ham. Unfortunately, after the first few months, the thrill of rebellion had worn off, and Loki had had enough. She had the personality of a fencepost, and the intelligence to match.Perdition Chapter Twenty Three - Inexorable1 year ago in Introductions & Chapters More Like This
She was now pregnant, and Loki of Asgard would not be known as a father who would abandon his child. Just as he had been, with Sleipnir. So he waited, tried to look after her even if she tried to refuse his help. What was a couple of months to a near-immortal?
‘Don’t just stand there!’
The hiss, tinted with pain, carried across the freezing cave they were hiding in. Oddly, it had never bothered Loki as it should, and though his breath coloured the air smoky grey, his uncovered fingers remained unaffected. Angrboða arched her back, letting out a bellow as she bore down. Loki