I Was In A Bad PlaceI’ll indite my crude and clumsy rhymes
From my place in the pitch dark
And will wait all night if needs must
For that one creative spark
That will manifest thoughts in my mind
Into a charged lightning bolt
Strike my memories, open my wounds
And let writing be my salt
So cut me and see the metaphors
Floating around my blood stream
Pour salt on the literal lesions
To punctuate my primal scream
As painful at first as the memory
But after the initial sting
Wounds will heel, leaving only scars
Numbness replaces everything
This lack of feeling is temporary
As a writer I live for the pain
Of opening up new abrasions
To keep me lucid and sane
Deviant words in dank surroundings
Disturbed thoughts I can not waste
I apologise in retrospect
But I was in such a bad place
Here With YouYou're right on the edge,Here With You2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
But you don't want to fall.
You're grasping in the air,
For anything at all.
Finally you find,
A place in my hand.
I begin to pull,
Bring you onto land.
Don't you worry.
You're safe here.
You'll be okay.
There's nothing to fear.
I see you crying.
You think of the end.
You feel so alone,
But I will be your friend.
Just talk with me.
You can even cry.
Just tell me everything.
Please don't be shy.
I just want you to smile.
I know it's tough to do.
Please just remember,
That I am here with you.
Only MeWhat would it feel like,Only Me2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
To just disappear.
You wouldn't know,
If you just weren't here.
There is no feeling,
Because you can't feel.
You can't interpret.
You just aren't real.
It's so lonely here,
Where you used to be.
I look around,
But it's only me.
If I Could DrawIf I could draw, I'd draw the world.If I Could Draw2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I'd draw abstract with a bunch of swirls.
I'd draw some trees and a small lake.
I'd draw the truth, as well as the fake.
I'd draw my friends and I'd draw me.
I'd draw the details of everything I see.
I'd draw the visions in my head.
I'd draw the dreams from my bed.
I'd let you see the world as I do.
I'd capture what's known by few.
There's just some things words can't show,
Some parts of my head you'll never know.
My drawings are so terribly bad.
Artistic ability, I wish I had.
Red DreamsDarling,Red Dreams2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I have thought about
kissing your scraped knuckles
as much as I have thought about
slicing my skin wide open like the sky.
I have dreamed of brushing
your collarbones with my mouth as much
as I have dreamed of greeting death
with a kiss on the cheek.
I have already loved you every
minute of my dragged out life.
Please do not think that
you weren't enough.
(My wiring is faulty.
I was always just a building
destined to burn.)
Suicidal Tendenciescourage doesn't comeSuicidal Tendencies2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
from the fibers you're
born with. You aren't
brave when you decide
when you wake
up in the bed
smeared with your
own self destruction
and you act as though
you aren't crumbling
into the carpet.
or when you hold
a piece of shrapnel
to your veins and
want to sever every last
one, but you throw it
out the window.
or when you stand
on the sunset
with clouds straddling
your mind and your
whole existence ready
to hurl itself over the
railing, but you limp
home and through the screen
door and pretend to walk
on air again.
That is bravery.
then he wavedhis fingers are harp strings,then he waved3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
tall blades of grass, cowering with a breeze,
a howl escaping them.
the notes with the wind curve across dunes,
mountainous joints curl with each pull,
sand escapes through protective eyelashes,
spreading its wings, gritty feathers,
enveloping a woman,
wearing time on her face like a veil,
she imagines the rugged strings
vibrating against her satin fingers
are the throats of songbirds,
cut from their beaks.
her tears and soft sobs write songs for the harp
he left near a window from which she
saw him smile to her for the last time.
Such a Peculiar PoemFeast upon the frozen dead, find yourself filling with dread.Such a Peculiar Poem3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Emotionless specularity, nothing more was ever said.
Elimination is key to the time, devour your face within your mind.
And from the forgetfulness comes a sliver of rhyme, damn the rest and seek the mime.
The mime who crossed the Gate of Lions, the mime who walked the Edge of Time.
The mime that danced to the rhythm of Gods, the mime that stepped between the lines.
Seek him out in the blank squares, he prepares vessels and broken hairs.
And when you see him say to his face, "Darling, your mind is space."
As Death ApproachedAs death approached, the girl just smiled.As Death Approached2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
"You've kept me waiting for quite a while."
He wonders "Shouldn't death you fear?"
"I've always thought that death was near."
The girl turned away to sink what she said.
"I have always felt I was already dead.
I float through this world without a care.
It's almost like I'm not really there.
So, no I'm not afraid of no longer being.
You can see that I'm already nothing."
Death just nodded. What she said was true.
"Regardless it is time for me to take you."
The girl stood up, all ready to go.
An afterlife she thought, wasn't likely to show.
Death did his duty, and took her away.
The girl finally had her awaited day.
Genuinely SmilingI test it out in the mirrorGenuinely Smiling2 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
The face I want them to see...
The gentle smile
Blesses me falsely
Even to my tear filled eyes,
But I won't let it fall
I try to make it shine more broadly
To be sure they know,
When they finally see me
Gaze into my unseeing eyes
And see the peaceful wonder
Left behind in my smile,
That I'm in someplace
Far better than here
Free of pain.
Someplace that I can genuinely
I want them to see.
The Mark of SinWhat if every time we committed sinThe Mark of Sin2 years ago in Traditional Fixed Forms More Like This
It was marked upon our skin?
And to be naked meant they knew our past
I bet we all would want to undress last
Adults would have such a hard time disciplining their kid
when just under their shirt the truth they hid
And how many preachers would have to sit down
because can a marked up man make honest sound?
All the prisoners would hold a grudge
when put away by a marked up judge
Or would we never be able to throw stones again?
because we found out we're all the same in the end.
ObsessionBlood-shot eyes frantically search,Obsession2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
Trembling hands with apparent blue veins are cut and bleeding
with lucid desperation.
The need is instilled deep within,
Will never cease and will always devour.
Sleepless nights and idle days start to fuse together.
What is the difference between the sun and the moon?
Quaking with a persistent panic,
What’s wrong with me?
Don’t want to be
Loneliness:a limbless spider entangled inLoneliness:3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
its own web,
writhing and awaiting to
only to be devoured by the fly.
skinwalkershe was a vicious prion,skinwalker2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
anomalous & infectious—
my fractured mind was the
perfectly unsuspecting host.
i was so ashamed of life
& you had all the answers.
"don't let me go,"
she hissed each night,
coating my flesh in a
(it was just too damn easy
to grasp your viral hands.)
i know my ribcage is almost on empty
& my heart is converting to toxic waste,
but i still have a feverish serum in my veins
& a voice not yet conquered by broken bones.
your plague of malevolence
shall never govern me again.
I Was Once Told My Heart BeatsI was once told my heart beatsI Was Once Told My Heart Beats2 years ago in Urban & Spoken Word More Like This
But how can I be sure
When my soul feels so empty
No sound so pure
As the reverberation of life
Beating in my core
So should i believe them
I'm sure they've lied before,
They said you only die once
But I first died when I was four
When daddy snuck into my room
And treated me like a whore,
And they said crying helps
That it sets the pain free
And though i cried every night
The tears never helped me,
They even said wounds heal with age
And though I got older,
Every single day
My wounds only grew deeper,
But I still continued to believe them
Even as they lied to me again
Telling me I'd find someone
Who'd save me from my pain
Someone who'd love me
For who I am
Not what I am
And past what's happened to me
Though I've searched and hoped
Believing what I was told
I was never enough for anyone
And my heart grew cold.
I was once even told
My heart beats
But that seems too lovely to believe.
You're Not AloneSometimes the words that are writtenYou're Not Alone2 years ago in Concrete Poetry More Like This
Don't really ever make sense
And we find ourselves confused
But our feelings so intense
Sometimes we cannot see what's
staring us directly in the eye
And while they wait for us to notice
We say our sour goodbyes.
There are times we don't take risks
Risks that could change our lives
and when the opportunity ceases to exist
we wish we could change our minds
But you cant live in the past forever
Because things don't ever stay the same
And while we blame everyone else
We only have ourselves to blame
So hold on to the moment
and take a long, hard look around
be happy with what you have in life
and refuse to be put down
Everybody has struggles in life
and while they may not all be known
just remember troubles come and go
And that you are never ever truly alone
FrostbiteNumbnessFrostbite2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I can’t feel my toes and at first I think
It’s just my toes.
I can cover them up.
I can warm them.
It spreads, like fire,
I glance away for a second, it seems, and my feet are cold
That’s funny, I didn’t feel that
Maybe I’ll cover them up too
I’ll warm them up.
I’ll take a nap
Maybe a short rest will make it all better, warm them
What’s that? How long has it been?
My legs… are you still mine..
Why has my breath left me, short?
Has everything but deserted me?
What about you, are you still here?
Are you still with me?
And before I can say goodbye, I think my thoughts are leaving me too –
LiliyaBright-eyed,Liliya2 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
mistress of light.
A Life for a Death My eyes flutter open. It's dark all around me. It seems like the black abyss goes on forever. Upon realizing that I was lying on my back, I slowly pulled myself up off the black ground. The only thing I can see is a faint light flickering a ways ahead of me. As my mind clears, I remember what I was doing here. I slowly make my way to the light, it's intensity increasing with every step I take.A Life for a Death2 years ago in Short Stories More Like This
My shoes clank across the hard floor. The fact that the sound didn't have an echo was creepy, suggesting that this place truly did go on forever. I take them off and cast them aside. I won't need them anymore, anyway.
Finally, after what seems like eternity,
LifelineI hate how I look;Lifeline3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
The bags beneath my eyes.
I hate who I am;
The endless torrent of lies.
Sometimes I do things I know I shouldn't
And I don't do things I know I should,
Only that I could and would,
Because that's how people work.
Everyone has motives
And nobody is selfless
In this world that doesn't want
Everyone's gonna die
And I'm not gonna lie;
Sometimes that thought is the only thing
That gets me through the day.
I miss my old razor blade;
Scissors don't go deep enough
This red isn't my favorite shade;
I like it purer,
Then I could be surer
That I'm a threat to myself.
I'm trying to cut down,
As apposed to cutting everything else,
But I doubt I'll ever stop
Because every slash,
Every bloody drop,
The whole crimson rash,
I'm still alive
And I am
With or Without YouYou have been standing there behind this glass for a long timeWith or Without You3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
I see you standing there, wanting to be free
Wanting to be free from your own situations
I see you waiting there for me to return
Nothing more than an emotionless face
Just starring there, a glare of emptiness
Now, only if I can make a smile
Only if you can believe me that I still care about you
Only if you can believe me that try my best to cherish you
Only if you can believe me that we can make this work
Look deep, down in your heart
There is pain that you have
Pain that is unbearable but you still carry it
But it is neither a pain of misery nor a pain of sadness
It is a pain of missing, to be without
It can't be irreplaceable
All you have is hope, hope that something will change
A burden to be lifted, no let it be found by joy and richness of others around you
To be fulfill with me
So I put my hand the glass, gently yours comes up too
I feel that you are so close but yet so far away
Looking at your long black hair, your
BlindIt is aBlind3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
crushing sadness -
as a fire
in the spirit,
black autumn leaves
in the snow -
it smolders so.
Just stale smoke,
into blind eyes
I do not care
if the stars
shine at night
or the bare
tattoo their design
upon my door...
ThoughtsI was once suicidalThoughts3 years ago in Free Verse More Like This
But now all I feel is
And I ask myself
...is that any better?
How Do You Like Your Eggs In The Morning?Sunnyside up.How Do You Like Your Eggs In The Morning?3 years ago in Flash Fiction & Vignettes More Like This
The pan was still warm when I dropped it into the sink. We had eggs. You had them sunnyside up, but I couldn't bear runny egg whites and so I had scrambled. Just in case. You found your right shoe and left. I sat at the kitchen table drumming my fingers against the buttercup plastic cloth and thought about Life with a capital L. What was it all about?
I started to think of breakfast as a metaphor for us. You had it all together. Sunnyside up. I was scrambled. A convoluted tick of a person. I started to consider my life as being thoroughly forked. I watched the birds outside the kitchen window for a while and did not relate them to what I had just eaten. After a long slither of time had passed I got up and washed the pan until the eggs were gone. You never came back. I learnt not to mind.